Well,
Here's the next episode!
Please read and enjoy!

Sorry if I had so many errors on the first episode,
But this time, I reread AND revised it PROPERLY now.

Guest starring Lindsey Lohan as Blackfire.

Disclaimer: All the references, characters, and everything else owned by a proper owner is owned by a proper owner. If there is a problem, PM me. Don't ban or delete my account or anything or I swear I'll-

A gigantic white comet like thing shot through the dark oblivion before soon splitting into three. One descended on the earth as if it was a shooting star and served as a background for the colorful fireworks set upon the sky.

Witnessing the falling white flash shine and perceiving it as a shooting star,

"Make a wish dear," a woman's voice urged.

"I wish I'd get laid already," a man's voice responded.

"What?"

"What?"

Zooming to another part of the scenery, a ferris wheel flashed its appearance among the other rides and stands that made a nameless carnival.

Awing at the sight,

"They're so big!" Starfire cheered, "And so pretty too!"

Checking out his companion's butt,

"Yeah," Robin smirked, "They sure are."

Turning to her teammate,

"Tell me again what they are called," she requested.

"Your ass"

Realizing what he just said,

"I-I mean fireworks," he shook his head before looking back at the sky, "Yeah...fireworks."

Silence filled the two as they continued to watch the bursting blooms of color spark colorful glitter across the sky. A frown came upon the red-haired teen as a thought came to her head.

"On my home planet," she started, "Explosions would mean that the Gordanians were attacking," turning to her masked friend, "You are certain Earth isn't under attack?"

"I know what's gonna be," he muttered.

"What?"

"What?"

Clearing his throat, "Want some cotton candy?" Robin offered before stretching out the fluffed sugar.

Staring down at the candy,

"The last time I ate a ball of cotton, it was white and did not taste very-"

"This one isn't drugged," Robin informed, "Now do want some or what?"

After witnessing Robin eat some himself, Starfire smiled before doing the same. She took time to taste and feel the sweet sugar in her mouth and gasped.

"It vanished!" she noted.

Robin chuckled, "That won't be the only thing that's vanishing tonight," he muttered.

"What?"

"What?"

Starfire blinked before shrugging it off. She looked forward before sighing.

"When I first came to Earth, I did not think I would fit in," she started, "Earth is filled with many strange things."

"Trust me, Earth isn't that bad," Robin commented, "You can find a lot of things you can 'fit in' to. You just need some time. In fact," he smirked, "I know something I can 'fit in' to."

"What?"

"What?"

"Robin," she called out worriedly, "Are you feeling alright?"

"Starfire I'm a 15 year old boy in tights and a cape," Robin stated, "How often do you think I get laid?"

"What do you mean by-"

"Here comes the finale!" Robin interrupted as he pretended to be interested at the increased number of exploding flashing colors, "Yes!" he cheered.

Staring at her excited friend, "Earth is full of amazing things," she awed at her friend.

Turning to the red-head and noticing her amazement, Robin smirked.

"Why don't I show you all of it?" Robin smirked devilishly.

Blinking peculiarly, "What do you mean?" she asked, "How would you do that?"

Robin inwardly cheered to himself. This is his chance to get laid! And with no interruptions.

Smirk deepening, "Why don't we go back to my place so we ca-"

Robin jumped from his seat and his grew big at the sight of something large and purple carry Starfire away from him. His mouth grew agape as Starfire's retreating form continued to disappear.

"WHAT THE F-"

-Opening Credits-

"I do not wish to go wherever you are taking me," Starfire's eyes glowered to the tentacled machine that carried her, "Robin told me he'd show me the rest of the Earth, and unless that's where you're taking me,"

A starbolt formed in her hand and the redhead used it to blast the purple squid-like thing.

"I do not wish to go!"

Fortunately for her, the shot paralyzed the flying machine for a few moments, giving her a chance to escape. It didn't take long until the purple thing regained movement before pursuing the alien girl once again.

-Scene Transition!-

A ring was shot through a bottle nozzle and a cheer was heard in response.

Beast Boy and Cyborg high-fived at Beast Boy's victory before he reached over for a giant chicken.

Chuckling proudly, he then handed the chicken to the blue-haired girl.

"Haha!" he cheered, "I told you we'd get you that "bildo" thing," Beast Boy said before the female retrieved the fake hen.

"This is way too big," Raven stated.

The three turned around at their leader's appearance behind them.

"Titans!" he called out, "Trouble!"

"Where's the dumb bimbo?" Cyborg asked.

"You mean Starfire?" Robin asked.

"Yup"

"That's the trouble," Robin said before turning around.

"Let me guess," Cyborg started, "She flew away when you wanted to knock her up didn't she?"

A scowl grazed the masked teenager's face, "She didn't know that," he stated.

"Well I'm pretty sure she can't miss the light saber in those tights of yours."

"Oh shut the f*** up and let's just get her already!" Robin snapped before leading the three of them to save the said girl.

The four ran until they reached the tip of a dock and watched as their red-headed teammate continued to be chased by the unknown flying squid.

Starfire turned around at the machine and gasped when its tentacles reached out one by one to retrieve her.

Wanting to fight back, Starfire shot a couple of starbolts at the machine's head, only to have no affect.

"Why does everything that's pointy, long, and fast always go after me?" Starfire wondered to herself before turning around to flee.

The four titans watched as Starfire zoomed past between them with her pursuer close behind.

"Looks like Starfire got another one," Beast Boy noted.

"If it tries to get her with in its legs again before mine does," Robin clenched his fists, "It dies."

After the statement, Starfire returned and flew behind the titans before the five of them prepared to attack her pursuer.

Beast Boy came first by transforming into an alligator, planning to capture the machine its mouth. Unfortunately, that didn't work out so well.

Raven used her magic to lift a hotdog stand.

"Come on hotdogs," Raven urged, "If you can't hit me, at least hit the foe here."

The machine collided onto the alienated one, to no avail.

"Damn it!"

When it approached him, Cyborg waited until he was behind the machine and grabbed it by the tentacles.

"Starfire what did you do last night?" Cyborg asked as it struggled to keep the machine in his grasp.

"I...don't know," Starfire responded, "All I remembered was drinking something Robin gave me an-"

"Got it"

Soon, the machine wiggled its way out of Cyborg's hold and headed toward Starfire's way again. To defend her, Robin pulled out his metallic stick and whacked the machine with it, causing the machine to fall into the water.

"Dude!" Beast Boy awed as he looked down on the place on the water the machine collided, "Robin actually did something?"

The titans turned around when the machine was seen emerging through the center of the dock. The machine rose up to the sky before turning around to pursue its target. When it approached them, Robin jumped on the machine and searched for something to turn it off.

"This is for stopping me from getting laid!" Robin thrusted his arms into a control system somewhere on the machine and yanked some wires off of it.

Robin jumped back onto the dock in one piece before the five of them watched the machine explode with the other fireworks.

Turning to him,

"Robin," Starfire started, "What exactly was in that drink you gave me?"

"Something I may or may not use again tonight," he responded.

"What?"

"What?"

Back at the tower:

"Thank you friends so much for saving my life!" Starfire cheered as she danced gracefully around the room, "Ooo, and thank you so much Robin for giving me that stress-relieving medicine! Mmm, is it me or is getting hot in here?"

The four titans eyes grew wide when a zipping sound was heard from her side of the room.

'Ah f*** yes!' Robin cheered in his head.

"Put your clothes back on hun and make way for someone who can really do the job right."

The five titans turned to a black-haired chick posing coolly against their long black couch. Her outfit was almost the same as Starfire's, only cooler.

(A/N: I don't mean to be prejudiced but I just love her outfit! And no it's not goth or emo. It's just cool.)

The girl chuckled and stretched out her arms to take in Starfire for an embrace.

"Sister!" Starfire cheered, "You're finally out of rehab!"

Pulling out of her grasp, "The name's Lindsey Lohan," Lindsey informed, "And yeah, I got bored so I knocked up some guard and got him to get me out."

"But enough about me," stretching out a hexagonal green gem tied to a string to serve as a necklace, "Look Starfire! Shiny!"

"Ooo!" Starfire dazzled, "Shiny!" she awed before taking the necklace.

"And I heard from the loopy men on the streets that you guys must be the Teen Titans," Lindsey announced before approaching the half robot.

"Cyborg right?" Lindsey guessed.

"H-hey!" Cyborg cheered, "How did you figure that out?"

Looking over the half-robot's form,

"Lucky guess," Lindsey answered before moving on to the blue-haired girl.

"And you must be Raven," Lindsey observed, "Damn and people say I'm emo?"

Ignoring the steaming girl, Lindsey moved on to Beast Boy.

"Oh my gosh!" Lindsey cheered, "Hulk Hogan? It's been a while!"

"No," Beast Boy corrected slowly, "It's Beast Boy."

"Oh," Lindsey blinked, "Never mind then."

"Ooo!" Lindsey awed before coming behind Robin, "This cape is sooo sexy!"

"...How did you get in here?" Robin asked.

"I seduced the security systems into letting me in," Lindsey smirked.

Raising an eyebrow,"You can do that?" Robin asked.

"Yup"

"...You do humans to right?"

"Oh yeah"

"Score!"

Leaning towards Raven, "I bet you can't seduce like Lindsey can," Beast Boy teased, "But unless you want to prove me wrong..."

"I'd rather seduce that wannabe octopus machine than seduce an animaniac," Raven stated and received a glare from Beast Boy.

"And this superhero mask," Lindsey awed as she inched closer to Robin's face, "Do you foreplay?"

"I can tonight if you wa-"

"So Lindsey!" Starfire interrupted just in time to stop Robin's hand from crawling up her sister's butt, "What brings you here on Earth?"

"I heard the earthlings here liked to party," Lindsey started before hopping on their couch, "And I wanted to try Earth's version of alcohol."

"Sure it got me on rehab," Lindsey started, "But it's not like the first time I did something naughty."

Suddenly interested at the topic,

"Tell me what else you did!"

"I bet she brought all the shut-downed factories back to life!"

"You know Hulk Hogan?"

"Oh I did more than just 'know' him," Lindsey winked, "Okay! So me and Hulk were in some party right? And then we got drunk and-"

"But sister!" Starfire interrupted, "Many have informed me that Hulk Hogan was dangerous because of a disease he has an-"

"Don't worry hun," Lindsey assured, "He always wear condoms."

"Now be a dear and get me that can of beer Cartoon Network tried to cover with a soda," Lindsey requested.

Starfire frowned and walked over to the fridge to comply to her request.

"Damn, I wanted the last can," Starfire sulked before taking the can from the icy storage.

-Scene Transition!-

"Our fourth drone has failed to return," one said, "The drones have failed us."

"Have they?" another inquired.

"Well do you see any of them holding the prisoner?"

"No..."

"Then shut up and let's go to Earth."

"...I hate you Frank."

"Lindsey!" Starfire called as she continued to search the halls of the tower, "Lindsey! Where are you sister? You forgot your medicine after eating breakfast!"

"That's perfect Robin!"

Starfire gasped at the sight of Lindsey and Robin's shadow coming close to each other.

"Now hold me right there and..."

A masculine grunt was heard and Robin was then seen tumbling onto a row of heavy dumbbells.

"That," Robin commented, "Was hot."

"Okay, now let me lock the room first so we can-"

"Hello Robin and my sister," Starfire protruded before anything else happens, "Am I interrupting?" she asked with inner proud-ness boasting in her chest.

"Well kind of," Robin answered, "Lindsey here was just getting me 'warmed up' for our 'spar'," he smirked, "Why didn't we ever do things like this Starfire?"

"That's because she's an inexperienced a virgin," Lindsey informed before pulling Robin somewhere away from the room, "Now let's go to your room before I stop being horny."

Starfire watched them from behind and frowned as she was left alone.

"Do any of you wish to watch a movie with me?" Starfire offered as she held out the movie food.

"Will there be any 'action' in the movie?" Robin asked.

"Umm...no?"

"Then no"

"That's good"

Everyone turned to the girl walking towards them in, to Starfire's surprise, Starfire's clothes.

"Since you guys are free," Lindsey started, "We could totally go clubbing tonight!"

"Yeah!" Beast Boy cheered, "I always wanted to get drunk, do stuff I'll probably regret but won't remember, and have a hangover in the morning!"

"Will there be chicks?" Cyborg asked.

"Duh" Lindsey answered.

"Count me in!" Robin cheered.

"They'll be serving free hotdogs."

This caught Raven's attention, making her officially in.

The five walked past Starfire as Starfire watched them walk away.

"I hope you don't mind me raiding your closet," Lindsey commented, "Robin literally tore mine off last night."

When Lindsey was in the right distance,

"Why am I related to such a drunk whore?" Starfire asked herself.

"C'mon boys," Lindsey urged as she continued to dance, "Superheroes like yourselves do know how to have fun right?"

"Bet Cyborg can do a mean robot!" Beast Boy challenged as he danced the dance himself.

"Oh so just because I'm black you assume I'm good at it?" Cyborg snapped, "Racist basta-"

-Scene Transition!-

(Oh f*** you Wolfie!)

"This party is pointless," Raven commented.

"Hey," an emo dude came up beside her, "Wanna do some stoic, unfeeling, off-screen fun?"

Raven shrugged before walking away with him.

When Starfire was left alone,

"Hey hot alien girl!" A guy called out to her, "Wanna go to the back room and get knocked up?"

"You mean like a door?" Starfire asked.

Loud laughter was heard and Starfire shrunk down and flushed at the embarrassment.

Starfire sighed as she rested her chin against her palms.

"Why am I not having the fun?" she asked.

"That's because you're up here, not down there."

Starfire looked up to see Robin walking towards her.

"And I wasn't just talking about the club," he added.

"I'm sure your suggestion sounds enjoyable," Starfire informed, "But I don't think it's enough to make me happy."

Robin raised an eyebrow at this, "Who doesn't get happy doing pleasurable things to my-"

"How do I look?" Lindsey interjected, showing off her pink wig.

"Like an Asian hooker," Robin answered, "Now if can excuse me, I'm trying to do this one," he pointed to Starfire.

Lindsey put her hands on her hips at the response, and cheered at the sudden change of music.

"Oh good an excuse to get some!" Lindsey cheered before dragging Robin back inside the club.

Starfire watched their retreating forms and sighed at the loneliness she's come to face again.

A flash was seen from the distance and Starfire gasped. Speaking of which...

-Scene Transition!-

Beast Boy continued to dance until he saw moving familiar moving figures on the roof fighting on the glass roof

"Cyborg!" he called.

Said man turned to face him.

"I need to go use the bathroom!" Beast Boy informed, "Can you dance with this hot chick for me while I'm gone?"

Cyborg nodded before dancing with the said girl.

Suddenly, purple tentacles reached out and grabbed Beast Boy while another machine tackled Cyborg.

-Censored Fighting Sequence-

"That was awesome!" Cyborg cheered.

"Yes I don't mind being a Teen Titan!" Lindsey beamed.

Bolting out of the dumpster, Starfire popped out and gasped.

"Maybe I should end this episode already and just leave," Starfire said to herself before setting off into the sky.

"No stay here!"

Starfire turned behind her to see Robin walking towards her.

"Let's piss Wolfie off by making this supposed-to-be abridged episode unnecessarily longer than it's supposed to be," Robin urged, "That'll teach her for keep interru-"

(Wolfie: Oh screw you!)

"Really?" Robin asked eagerly.

(Wolfie: No! Geez boy can't you control your hormones? They've been annoying everyone since the beginning of the episode!)

"Why don't you try being a geeky teenage boy in a superhero costume and you try getting laid!"

(Wolfie: Maybe I will!)

"Umm Robin?" Starfire called out, receiving Robin's attention, "The episode..."

"Oh," Robin jumped, "right, go on."

Starfire screamed through the giant tentacle's grip on her mouth as it continued to pull her away.

'Okay,' Robin thought as he started to chase after her, 'I only got one shot at this!'

'If I catch her, we both get a chance to live. But if I don't, we're both totally screwed.'

'Here goes!' Robin thought before he jumped and reached out to Starfire's foot. Unfortunately for him, he missed.

"Damn you Robin!" Starfire muffled as she continued to be pulled away.

"I don't know how I'm hanging upside down on this ship while it's flying over 70 miles per hour," Robin started with himself, "But I'll just along with it."

-Censored Fighting Sequence-

"My sister framed me for a crime she did?" Starfire fumed.

"Yes," Robin confirmed as he held Starfire's necklace in his hands, "That's exactly what I just finished telling you."

"Not to mention she's gonna get away with it," Beast Boy pointed to the flying girl behind him.

"Oh no she won't!" Starfire stated before chasing after her.

-Scene Transition-

"First you steal my spotlight, have sex with my future boyfriend, then accuse me of a crime that would send me to jail for life?" Starfire scolded to the black-haired girl, "What kind of an older sister are you?"

"This kind!"

Starfire wailed as a purple starbolt shot her back across the sky.

-Censored Fighting Scene-

"I can't believe I'm going back to that stupid place!" Lindsey fumed as she continued to be pulled away by the giant red alien's tentacle (A/N: hehe).

"You're gonna pay for this you little b****!" Lindsey threatened, "In a few episodes, I'm gonna force to marry a gigantic starburst and threaten your relationship with your friends and your kingdom so I can rule Tamaran!"

"What?"

"What?"

Oh finally!
It's finally done!
Sorry if I'm a bit vulgar in this episode.

But I hope you guys like it anyway.

Tell me whatcha think please!
And thanks for reading!