MISADVENTURES OF A MARY SUE
THE SPOT CONLON EDITION
Mary: (Throwing her hand dramatically against her sweaty forehead) My name is Mary…Mary Sue! I'm just immigrated from Ireland, and I'm looking for my childhood sweetheart/playmate. His name is Sean. I'm working as a Manhattan newsie to earn my keep, but whenever I can; I sneak across the Brooklyn bridge to look for my dear friend and only love.
Race: Her name is Mary, but her newsie name is Pointless. She's a total nuisance…but also completely perfect. (Is a love-struck puppy) She's amazing, and sells papers like a natural. She can look curvy, even when wearing men's clothing. Her voice is beautiful and sweet; she can sing, dance, and often works with Medda. Her accent is flawless, no matter what dialect she chooses to take on. (Faints from her pure awesomeness)
IN BROOKLYN
Spot: I've been here in Brooklyn avoiding…I mean searching, for my long-lost-love, Mary Sue. I heard that Manhattan found an Irish broad and named her Pointless. Apparently, Racetrack Higgins is in love with her. I went over the bridge to see who it was and…
Mary/Pointless: SEAN!
Spot/Sean: MARY!
Mary/Pointless: I missed you so much! My mother and father died tragically on the crossing from Ireland to America. It's terrible. I'm living now with the Manhattan newsies and have taken no interest in any of them even though they're all head-over-heels for me!
Sean/Spot: Oh Mary! You can come live in Brooklyn with me!
Mary/Pointless: I'll be over in five!
SOMEWHERE IN NEW YORK…
Newsie Leader of Queens: Apparently my borough has some strange fight to pick with Conlon and his new girlfriend will be the perfect bait! Yes, we'll kidnap the girlfriend and cause a huge city-wide newsie war!
Dumb sidekick: YEAH! Kidnap the girlfriend!
AFTER THEY'VE KIDNAPPED THE GIRLFRIEND
Spot: I suppose this means I have to go get her back…or…I could leave her for the next poor chapter of this story…