When Rachel was eighteen years old, she was the first person in her group of friends to leave Lima. She left quickly, eagerly, and never looked back from the second she stepped foot in New York City. New York had always been her happy place, and Lima had always been nothing but terrible to her. And because her dads knew that they'd never again be able to pull Rachel away from the bright lights of Manhattan, they'd splurged and bought her a small apartment near her college campus, as opposed to having her live in student accommodation. It was a good decision, and Rachel had never felt more at home than in her little apartment above a quaint little bakery.

Although Rachel kept in contact with some old friends from glee club through regular phone calls and emails, she never once returned to the town she grew up in. If anyone wanted to see her, she'd insist that they visit the city, that they take her perfectly made-up but small guest room. She never wanted to return to the little town in Ohio, and the people who knew her well enough understood that. However, during her first year away from home, there was one singular reason that sometimes made her long to visit, and that reason was Noah Puckerman.

Breaking up with him had been a total disaster, and she'd felt guilty for months afterwards. How could she not? Every time she remembered it, all she could picture was the expression on Noah's face, changing from shocked to angry, with that little flash of hurt in between, the one that had vanished almost as quickly as it appeared. She'd wanted to visit home, call him, anything to check up on him, because despite the fact that she'd broken up with him, she still cared. She cared too much about him and his future, their future together even, and she was getting little in return. So what other choice did she have?

It had taken a surprising amount of strength on her behalf, but she resisted the urge to contact him. Break ups are rarely easy, and theirs was no exception. She'd missed him, of course she had, but she learned to move on. She'd had her career to think about, the one that she'd worked towards her entire life.

College had been amazing. Rachel, although she'd previously been the kind of girl who had major difficulties when it came to making friends, had fit in so easily. Her classes were filled with people just like her (although maybe a little less talented). They shared the same interests and passion for music, and within her first week she'd made friends with two girls who went on to become her very best friends throughout her time in New York (with the exception of Kurt, of course, who was studying at a different college in the city).

To help her dads fund her studies, Rachel got a part-time job in a family restaurant and earned the most tips because of her smile and her enthusiasm. Because of her job, her studies, and her constant stream of auditioning, Rachel was the busiest she'd ever been, and she'd loved almost every second of it.

The one thing that had taken Rachel by surprise was how difficult it was to get noticed in the city. Of course, she knew she'd be in the same boat as thousands of other girls who shared the same dreams, although she'd always been firm in her belief that she'd be the most talented of all of them. Maybe this was the case, but no one seemed to want to take that chance, and after over a hundred auditions where she'd earned only five chorus parts and three roles as an understudy, she'd really started to believe the various directors when they told her she "didn't have the right look", or - much more bluntly – that she wasn't pretty enough.

The constant rejection hit Rachel hard, and for a while when she was twenty-one, she broke down completely. Extremely low on money and self-confidence (her job didn't exactly pay her a fortune), she started eating less - despite the fact that she was already thin. She saving every single spare penny, and she began looking into rhinoplasty again, even though she'd already dismissed the option once when she was seventeen. Even the idea of a boob job had crossed her mind once or twice, and it was Kurt who finally managed to talk some sense into her once he'd realized what was going on. She remembers the moment clearly – he'd stormed into her bedroom one morning with a buttery croissant, a full fat strawberry smoothie and a box of candy, demanding that she eat them. The two had ended up spending the entire day snuggled up under Rachel's blankets talking, crying, and looking through various picture albums where Kurt would point out how beautiful she looked in every single photograph.

Three months after she reached her lowest point, she managed to score an understudy role as Rizzo in an off-off Broadway production of Grease. She'd tried not to act too happy when the original actress (the director's niece) was fired during the second week of rehearsals, after arguing with her uncle non-stop over his ideas, but Rachel couldn't help the huge smile that spread out over her face after she had a rough run through of the dialogue and her big solo, and noticed the director staring at her with an expression of complete awe on his face after her performance.

"Rachel," He'd choked out, and she'd tried not to smile at him too smugly. "That was... I should've..."

He shook his head in disbelief and moved to kiss her on both cheeks, and she'd flushed with pleasure and relief, and above all, pride. She'd been thrilled for the rest of the day, even though she'd went on to spend four excruciating hours working on direction and blocking.

The reviews for the show had been good. The reviews for Rachel herself had been outstanding. She had credits to her name now, and it was because of those that she landed the lead role in an off-Broadway production of Beauty and the Beast. It had been one of the best experiences of her life, much more professional than Grease, though she'd always think of her first proper show fondly and nostalgically. She played Belle for almost a year to amazing reviews, and because she was quickly climbing up the ladder, more and more people were beginning to be interested in her work. After her run in Beauty and the Beast had come to an end, she didn't allow herself any breaks. Always afraid that her newly-discovered stardom would begin to fade, she dived into more auditions and charmed her way into the leading role of Maria in West Side Story on Broadway. Actual Broadway.

When she got the call, she'd been at an elegant restaurant with Kurt and his boyfriend, and she'd promptly burst into tears at the table, causing everyone in the room to look at her. Kurt had immediately rushed to her side, wiping away her tears until she'd been able to speak in between her deep, heaving sobs.

"I'm on Broadway!" She'd wailed dramatically, and Kurt had started crying too because he'd known first-hand how much she'd struggled. Kurt's boyfriend Henry had laughed at the pair, and the obvious tourists in the restaurant had started applauding enthusiastically, whilst the New Yorkers simply went straight back to eating.

She remembers Kurt ordering bottle upon bottle of alcohol, and she'd stumbled home drunk on champagne and happiness. She'd navigated her way through the streets of New York, arms linked through Kurt and Henry's, all the while singing every Barbra Streisand song she knew (all of them) at the top of her lungs.

Her run as Maria had lasted a year, and it had been the best year of her life. So many of her dreams had come true. The city had been plastered with posters of her face, advertising the show, and her dads had insisted on taking her picture by every single one when they came to visit. She'd demanded that everyone she knew bought copies of the soundtrack, and reserved her friends and family front-row seats on opening night. She threw herself completely into rehearsals and fell in love with not only the show, but her leading man too. She and Robert, although they never officially dated, frequently got together in Rachel's apartment after an especially-stressful show, or after they'd shared a few drinks. She supposes that he'd been her friend with benefits, even though she had always despised that term. She'd have loved for him to have been more than just an occasional sex partner, but Robert was somewhat of a ladies man, and when he actually fell into a relationship with a girl who wasn't her after seventeen months of working with him, she decided it was time to leave the show and leave Robert behind her. She wasn't worried about her other options – she now had an agent who assured her regularly that there were offers coming in for her every day. Still, she'd loved her character and she'd loved Robert, and she cried hard at the end of her final performance for many different reasons.

At twenty-five, she landed her dream role as Elphaba in Wicked. She'd never worked harder on any role, simply because she knew that she had so much to live up to. She distinctly remembers fretting to Kurt one night after rehearsal as she soothed her blistered feet in a basin of warm, bubbly water "how on earth am I supposed to compare to Idina? Idina!" However, despite all of her worrying, her focus and hard-work paid off, and it was proven when the New York Times described her as "the best Elphaba that the Gershwin stage has seen in a long, long time" after her opening night.

She lived, slept and breathed Elphaba for two years, and it was worth every second. In those two years she won her Tony Award, the item she now treasures more than life itself. Also, she fell in love with thirty-six year old Nathan, a critic for one of the more prestigious entertainment magazines in the city. Unlike her relationship with Robert, Nathan actually fell in love with her too, and they're still together now, in a calm and sophisticated relationship. He takes her to jazz concerts and expensive bakeries for lunch, and he's the kind of boyfriend that she'd always secretly wanted. Classy and mature.

And now, at twenty-eight years old, Rachel finds herself wanting to take a step back from the stage and explore other options, before time passes and a fresh new wave of talent hits the industry. She worries, much more than she'd like to admit, about being out of a job, being unable to find work. She knows how difficult it can be. After all, she was once that person living on cheap instant-meals and candlelight for a while, right out of college and still only landing chorus roles. The only person who ever knew how bad it got was Kurt, and that was only because he caught her by surprise one night by spontaneously showing up at her place. She didn't tell anyone else, and made Kurt swore he wouldn't either. She refuses to be seen as a failure, and she just can't experience that feeling of desperation ever again. It's why she's decided to slowly build up a film and TV career alongside her stage one. More credits mean more opportunities, and that means less chance of ever going back to worrying about how she's going to pay rent (even though she has plenty of money in her bank account so that she doesn't have to worry about that for a long, long time). She needs to be ready, be prepared for the absolute worst, which is where this movie comes in.

Also, she thinks she'd make a really good film star. And she can't imagine a better on-screen debut than with the role she auditioned for earlier today – a sassy, sexy, scary serial killer. She could be amazing at that role, she just knows it. She only hopes that Ben, Noah and the others know that too.

She doesn't know why she let Noah kiss her. She doesn't know what to say to him as he looks up at her now, his eyes searching her face intently. He's always been very good at that. It flusters her now just like it used to – she always felt that he was looking deep inside her and seeing things that no one else ever saw, even if it does sound ridiculously clichéd.

"You have a boyfriend," He repeats her words, and she bites her lip, nodding her head. He narrows his eyes and lifts himself up out of the pool so that he's standing beside her. She can see the outline of his erection through his boxers and she flushes, looking away from him. She's dripping water everywhere. They both are.

"So what the fuck was that?" He asks angrily, stepping over to the patio and grabbing the towels he brought out earlier. He practically shoves one into Rachel's hands and she glares at him as she takes it, before quickly toweling the ends of her hair dry.

"You show up out of nowhere after ten years, audition for my movie, we have a few drinks, and then you let me kiss you? You don't think you should've mentioned your boyfriend earlier?"

"Please don't start, Noah," Rachel says, her voice firm and in control. "It's been a lovely evening. Let's not ruin it. I just-"

"You already ruined it," He replies, eyes dark. He picks up her dress and throws it to her, and she only just manages to catch it before it lands in the pool.

"Please don't make this worse than it already is," Rachel says pleadingly, because she honestly thinks she's about to start crying, and she can't break down in front of him. Her head is a little cloudy from the drinks she's had, and she's just so mad at herself for spacing out, for forgetting everything except the way Noah's rough hands felt on her skin. "I don't know what I was thinking, I just-"

He rolls his eyes and she feels him watching her as she dries the bikini as best as she can with the towel before slipping into her dress, each movement clumsy and awkward.

"So what, huh? You see me and everything comes rushing back? All those feelings you once had?" His words are absolutely dripping with sarcasm and she hates it, how awful he's making her feel right now. She feels terrible enough without him adding to the guilt.

"You have no idea what you're talking about," She says, her voice eerily controlled. "It's not like I suspected you were going to kiss me after ten years of no contact whatsoever."

"Why the fuck would I contact you after you ditched my ass?"

"Why do you feel the need to bring up old arguments?"

"Why do you let me feel you up and get all turned on if you're not going to let me fuck you?"

She splutters indignantly. How dare he say such disgusting things after just hours of meeting up again? He's never had any manners whatsoever, and she's suddenly beginning to remember just how frustrating he can be. She sends him an absolutely murderous stare as she ungracefully shoves her feet into her shoes. "You are such a pig, Noah Puckerman! Do not talk to me that way!"

He smirks dryly at her, and she swears she could just slap him right now. "You know what, Princess? How about I just don't talk to you at all?"

"Fine!" Furious, Rachel throws her towel in his direction, and although it hits him squarely in the chest, it has no impact whatsoever. He raises his eyebrows and she huffs angrily, before spinning around and heading back into the house. She accidentally kicks over a bottle of beer on her way to the door, but she makes no movement to clean it up.

She hates that he lives so far away from where her hotel is – but she's got far too much pride to ask him for a ride back to the city. She saw a bus stop at the bottom of the hill leading up to his house, and that will just have to do.

… … …

Puck curses to himself as he dumps the beer bottles in the trash and shoves the towels in the laundry basket. That little display back there got way too out of control, and he's so angry about it that he accidentally knocks a bunch of stuff over as he storms through the house, forcefully navigating his way through the maze of cardboard boxes. He just can't wrap his head around what happened, and why the fuck he's so mad right now. She made a mistake, yeah, but it's not too big of a deal, and he knows that. She was like, intoxicated or whatever. So why the fuck is he so pissed about it? He knows he acted like a total douche, but apparently he finds it really easy to get angry at Rachel, and he fucking hates that she got such a reaction out of him. It shows that he legit cares about some shit, and he doesn't, okay? The whole day has just been fucking insane. It caught him off guard, or something.

Okay, so maybe he cares a little bit, but he sure as hell doesn't want her to know that.

It probably all comes down to their history together with all the unresolved issues, but he sure as fuck isn't going to bring that up again.

Jesus Christ. He knew that inviting her back to his place was a bad idea. But she'd looked so fucking happy today, and she'd always had this goddamn power over his pathetic ass.

Still, he shouldn't have let her leave by herself, even if he was a total jackass, and she was acting like a complete bitch. Shit.

… … …

The first thing Rachel does when she gets back into her hotel room is have a shower. She feels gross, not only because of the sweat and chlorine from Noah's pool, but from the guilt, anger, and alcohol that's surging through her body. She definitely sobered up on the bus ride home, but the shower still helps her to feel better, and she only cries a little bit as the warm water runs over her smooth skin.

She feels so out of place right now. It's only been two days, but she misses the loudness and familiarity of New York. Granted, Los Angeles isn't exactly quiet, but it's doesn't sound anything like home. Maybe this whole idea was a mistake. Maybe she should skip the callback and try a different movie. Maybe she should just go back to New York, and try out for a role in the next big Broadway musical. She just doesn't want to deal with any more scenes like the one she and Noah had today. She doesn't think she can.
And then, as quickly as the feeling appeared, it's gone, replaced with annoyance at herself for letting one stupid boy make her doubt herself and her decisions. Sighing loudly, she quickly towel dries her naked body and pulls on her favorite nightgown, hating the way that Noah has always managed to get into her head and make her question things. She hasn't seen him in almost ten years and he still has that effect on her. How does he do it?

Rachel looks at her phone, suddenly filled with longing to talk to Nathan, to hear his voice. Suddenly feeling tired and hungry, Rachel climbs onto the bed and crosses her legs, calling room service quickly to order a sandwich. There's a text from her agent, letting her know the details of her callback audition in four days, and she reads it three times, biting her lip nervously before she dials her boyfriend's number.

He answers on the second ring.

"Hey, darling."

"Nate," Rachel answers, the corners of her lips turning upwards in a small smile. "I miss you."

Nathan laughs fondly through the phone. "Rachel, it's only been two days. But nevertheless I miss you too. Quite a lot, actually. How is California?"

"It's different. I like it."

"More than New York?"

"Of course not! Although I do quite like how you aren't really shoved along the sidewalk here. There aren't as many crowds."

Nathan laughs again, and the sound comforts Rachel. She leans back into the mountain of pillows and closes her eyes.

"How did your audition go?"

"It was... I got a callback."

"Rachel, that's amazing! I'm proud of you sweetheart."

"Thank you. It just means that I'll be in LA for a little while longer."

"But it will be worth it, right? If you get the part?"

She murmurs an agreement and grabs a spare pillow, hugging it to her chest. "Yes. But I wish you could've flown out with me until the audition process was over."

Nathan sighs, and she knows he wishes he was there too. "I know, darling. I want that as much as you do. But I have meetings and concerts lined up for the next few weeks, you know that. I have deadlines."

"I know, I know." She smiles a little. "I think you'd like it here."

"LA? Not a chance, Rachel. Too laid-back for my taste. I thought you'd be the same," He chuckles and she giggles alongside him, knowing that he's right.

"Sometimes it's nice to relax," She defends herself playfully, and there's a sudden knock on the door. Room service. She pulls a face. "I need to go. I need food and then sleep."

"You haven't eaten yet? Rachel, it's late."

"I just... lost track of time. Don't worry, I'm fine." She climbs from the bed and makes her way to the door. "Goodnight, Nate. I love you."

"Love you too, my darling. Sweet dreams."

… … …

When Rachel goes to the studio for her callback, she's tense. How could she not be? But everyone greets her warmly, and she meets Leon Carter, the smoldering well-known actor who has fangirls following his every move, despite the fact that he's happily married to a gorgeous supermodel. He's also the movie's male lead, and he's funny and charming, and she feels completely welcome.

Noah, however, doesn't say a word to her. Actually, she looks rather bored, and it unnerves her. What if he puts in a bad word and she doesn't get the part? No, he's not that person. Or is he? She doesn't know him anymore.

She tries to stop her eyes from flickering towards him as she and his cast members talk about the role and what she'll be doing that day. Noah stays quiet, eyes on his phone the entire time.

"Noah, you're being very rude right now. I don't think you should be texting during the casting session of a movie that you're producing," She scolds suddenly, unable to stop herself. There's a brief silence in which she thinks she's ruined everything, but then everyone's laughing hysterically, and Noah is rolling his eyes but putting his phone away, and Rachel blushes, hiding her face in her hands. She shouldn't have done that. She should not have done that.

"Rachel," Ben grins, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. "My God, you're perfect. You're exactly the kind of person we need."

Rachel looks up, biting her lip. Her cheeks are still red. "Really?"

"Confident. Sassy. Fearless. You're brilliant." Nick chimes in with a huge smile in her direction, and she giggles a little. She's always been a sucker for compliments. She watches as Nick turns to Noah, punching him lightly on the shoulder. "She owns you, dude."

"Fuck off," Noah scoffs, glaring at him. "Read the scene, Berry."

"Touchy." Leon teases Noah, and grins as he passes a script to Rachel. Rachel takes it and smiles back at him. "Ready, lovely?"

"Bring it," Rachel replies, and she feels Noah's eyes on her suddenly, like a sixth sense.

Oh. She remembers that line.

"You know, I just can't figure you out, Cassie." Leon reads, slipping flawlessly into his character, and Rachel focuses herself, quickly glancing down at her line before looking up at Leon with a breezy, controlled manner. "What are you even doing here?"

"You really think I'm going to tell a stranger all of my secrets?" Rachel raises her eyebrow and trails her fingers slowly down Leon's arm. "And I told you already, don't call me Cassie. Don't make me tell you again."

"I wouldn't call us strangers, exactly," Leon smiles cutely, and he pulls Rachel closer to him. She smirks and places one hand on his chest, easily pushing him away from her. Laughing lowly and dryly, she casually takes a step back from him and ignores the feeling of the extra four pairs of eyes on her. It's a small, warm room, but there's really only herself and Leon; Cassandra and Zachary, and those two characters are the only things that matter right now. She throws herself into the audition, and by the end of the scene she knows she's got everyone in the room eating right out of the palm of her hand. It's a good feeling. She feels powerful.

The scene ends when Zachary is about to kiss Cassandra, and Leon is so close to her that she can feel his minty breath on her face. She's looking up at him with heavy-lidded eyes, lips parted just slightly, and for some unknown reason, she wants so badly to look at Noah right now, just to judge his reaction.

"Amazing," Sarah breathes, when Leon breaks character and pulls away laughing, holding up his hand to give Rachel a high five. She has to stand on her tiptoes to reach him, but she slaps her palm against his, giggles, and turns to face the others. They all look impressed. Noah is wearing that signature look, managing to appear somehow bored and interested at the same time. His eyebrow is raised, and she can tell he's deep in thought.

"Amazing." Nick repeats, and Rachel knows she's got the part. She can just feel it.

… … …

"Rachel Berry," Ben says, leaning back in his chair. "She's got my vote."

There's a murmur of agreement throughout the room, and Puck keeps quiet, because he knows he's just going to lose this argument. It's the final casting meeting for the role of Cassandra, and he just knows that come July when filming starts, he'll be around Rachel for at least four months.

He's totally fucked.

"I liked Katherine Heigl," Puck murmurs bitterly, and Nick scoffs at him.

"Are you serious? Rachel's perfect. All dark eyes and attitude."

"Katherine's taller," He argues for no apparent reason, and Nick looks as though he wants to punch Puck in the face if he talks Ben, Sarah, and Christina into hiring Katherine instead of Rachel. He knew the idiot was nuts for her. Fucking knew it.

"So? We'll put Rachel in heels if that's seriously an issue!"

"Guys," Christina interrupts them, holding up her hand all authoritatively and shit. "Let's look at this objectively. Rachel and Leon had insane amounts of chemistry."

Puck is not jealous, okay? He's not. That weird feeling in his stomach is just hunger or something. But he knows Christina's right. It's Rachel Berry. She could have chemistry with a goddamn rock.

"Rachel herself shares personality traits with Cassandra," Christina continues to list points, while the others nod their heads like those stupid little bobble-head toys. Puck tries hard not to roll his eyes at everyone. "Leon loves her, she's got the right look, the camera adores her, she's got great acting experience... Not to mention she has quite the fanbase after her roles on Broadway. She's not as well-known as Katherine Heigl, no, but frankly, I think she has the talent to do a better job."

"I agree," Sarah chimes in. "Besides, we'll get credit for casting a movie amateur also. It'll generate some great press for us. Bonus points."

"Puck," Ben says seriously, and Puck looks up at his friend, scowling. "Do you really think that this isn't the role for Rachel?"

Puck sighs, defeated, and gives in to the sucky thought of being around her for weeks on end. He's telling the truth when he answers. "No. I think she'll be awesome."

Ben grins at him, clapping his hands together. The sound echoes through the room. "Then we have an agreement. Fax her agent the paperwork, Rachel's our girl."

… … …

"I got the part!" Rachel's shrieking down the phone to Kurt, and he's shrieking back, and she's glad her cellphone is on speakerphone, because she could not handle his high-pitched screaming straight in her ear.

Her cheeks hurt from smiling.

"I knew you would!" Kurt cries gleefully, and she can hear someone talking in the background. "I knew it! Henry says congratulations!"

"Thank you!" She's laughing giddily, pacing all around her hotel room, too excited to sit still. "This is amazing!"

"I'm your date to the premiere, right?"

"Right! Of course!"

"I'm so happy for you, Rach!"

"I'm happy too! I thought that Noah wouldn't-"

"Oh hush, of course he wouldn't blackball you! That silly boy has always had major feelings for you, crazypants."

"Not anymore he doesn't," She says, and she hears Kurt scoff at the other end of the line. She told Kurt everything – she always tells Kurt everything – and the boy has already started coming up with his own theories about what could happen between them.

"Don't start your whining, my dear! You just got cast in a movie! With Leon Carter!" He sidetracks her from her thoughts, and she can't help but let out a little squeal. The words just sound too good to be true.

"We start filming in a couple of months," She tells Kurt, an ear-splitting smile on her face. "They're renting me a little apartment here while we're filming. So we have eight weeks to pack up my furniture and put my life in New York on hold for a little while. Speaking of New York, my flight gets in tomorrow at 10pm, and could you please please please be the bestest friend ever, and have some fresh bread and milk waiting for me at my apartment?"

"Sure thing, diva."

Kurt and Rachel talk for a while longer, but she's finding it difficult to really pay attention. Her mind is filled with thoughts of movies and trailers and director's chairs and premiers, and she has butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. It's definitely going to be a lot of work and undoubtedly stressful, but Rachel genuinely can't wait to get started and see if her talent on stage translates to the big screen. She's really only a little nervous about spending time with Noah, especially because they aren't really on the best of terms, but she can't imagine it will be too unbearable. After all, she is a professional and she's never let anything stop her before. This will be no different.

She doesn't think she can wait two whole months.