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I don't own the Gilmores.

Chapter Twelve - Life Will be the Death of Me

"Hey Daddy." Rory smiled when Jess opened the door to his apartment, quickly frowning as the words left her mouth. "Well, that was incredibly dirty." She smirked as she followed him into the apartment.

"I expect no less from a Gilmore. What are you doing here?"

"Mathew's still working, and I got bored watching him type, so I decided to come here and see my favourite parents to be. Where's Lydia?" She asked as Jess sat back on the couch and she took the arm chair.

"Bathroom." Jess jerked his thumb in its direction. "Whoever called it 'morning sickness' was way off."

"So, if she's sick, why aren't you doing that whole good husband thing, and holding her hair?"

"She has forbidden me." Jess sighed. "She was rambling on about she was gonna get fat, and how I'll want to leave her, and if I see her throwing up it'll only exacerbate the problem. And then I opened my mouth."

"What did you say? Hopefully you nodded and agreed?"

"Nope. I told her that exacerbate was a big word for a math. teacher and either she'd eaten a dictionary, or our kid was a genius."

"No. Jess, you idiot. What did she say?"

"Nothing. She threw a dictionary at me." Jess pointed to the small red bump on his temple.

"Good for her. So she's in there by herself?"

"No, Lil's with her. But I swear, this pregnancy thing is making her crazy. It's like living with a Gilmore."

"Hey! I'm offended by that!" Rory threw a cushion at him. "And be thankful she's not a Gilmore. My mom kicked Luke out of the house for two weeks when she was pregnant with Charlie."

"Why?"

"He insulted Paul Anka."

"I know she loves that dog bu-"

"Ah nope." Rory cut him off. "Real Paul Anka. He insulted real Paul Anka, not the dog one."

"Okay, that is crazy. Even for your mother."

"I know. So you thank your lucky stars you don't have a knocked up Gilmore on your hands. Just, think before you open your mouth. Filter everything."

"Okay." Jess nodded.

"How weird is this?" Rory laughed, "Me giving you tips on how to deal with your pregnant wife."

"About as weird as you dating my best friend." Jess grinned.

"Or you having a best friend!" Rory gave him a bright smile.

"Low blow Gilmore."

"Well, you weren't exactly Mr. Popularity in high school." Rory laughed as Lily came out of the bathroom.

"Oh and by the way," Jess whispered to Rory, "don't tell Lydia she looks good. That caused tears earlier."

"Men." Rory rolled her eyes as Lydia came out from the bathroom, a damp wash cloth pressed to her forehead.

"Hey, Rory." She smiled weakly. "When did you get here?"

"Few minutes ago. How you feeling?"

"Terrible. Oh and Jess?" She sat beside her husband, "I'm sorry about earlier. I know you didn't mean anything by it. I'm just really cranky and can I blame it on the hormones?"

"Sure." Jess put his arm around her shoulder, pulling her to him and dropping a kiss on the crown of her head.

"I know you're not gonna leave." She placed a kiss on his chest.

"Well not unless Rachel McAdams asks." Jess quipped, causing Lydia to pull out of his embrace and hit him on the chest.

"Jess!" Rory gasped, "What did I say about a filter?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean it. I swear."

"It's fine. I forgive you." Lydia smiled, resting her head back on his shoulder. "But only 'cause I'm too tired to fight."

"Seriously. Filter it." Rory pointed her finger at Jess.

"I don't think I have one."

"Oh, Rory, you haven't seen the scan picture yet." Lydia reached over Jess and picked up a small silver frame and handed it to Rory.

"You framed your scan picture?" Rory laughed taking the frame that read 'My 1st Picture" across the top.

"Yeah." Lydia nodded and got up to sit on the arm of Rory's chair. "There." She pointed to a small gray dot in the middle of the picture. "That's Peanut."

"Peanut?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Peanut's very cute."

"Thank you. I think so too."

The door knocked and Lily got up to answer it.

"Hey Mathew." She retreated back to her spot on the sofa.

"Hey. I brought pizza." He smiled putting the pizza on the table and kissing Rory lightly on the lips.

"Is there cheese on that pizza?" Lydia asked, placing her hand over her mouth.

"Yeah." Mathew nodded as Lydia turned and ran to the bathroom again. "What's up with her?"

"She's having an aversion to dairy products." Jess told him as he followed Lydia. "Lyds?" He knocked on the door. "I'm coming in." He opened the door and then turned back to Mathew. "Get rid of that." He told him and closed the door behind him.

"Being pregnant must suck." Mathew sighed, as he lifted the pizza box and walked to the door. "There was a homeless guy outside who might like this." He paused and turned back. "Can she eat Chinese?" He asked Lily.

"Yeah, just make sure you get nothing with chicken. All pork. That's okay with you, right?" She asked Rory.

"I'll eat anything." Rory smiled.

"Okay."

"Here, Mathew, take my key." Lily pulled her key from her pocket and tossed it to him.

"Thanks." Mathew grinned, catching the key attached the small heart keychain and headed out.

"So, Lil," Rory smiled, "how's the new boy?"

"Who, Alex?"

"I thought his name was Dan."

"Oh, no, we just had a few dates. But we decided we're better as friends." Lily grinned, shaking her hair of her of her shoulder.

"So, Alex. What's he like?"

"Cute. But an idiot. I don't see it lasting much longer."

"Okay." Rory slowing nodded her head.

"I'm dating." Lily explained. "Playing the field." She used the phrase Lydia had used. "Relationships are to much hassle. I have plenty of time for them later."

"Well, good for you. I was never very good at dating. I was a relationship girl. Still am." Rory confessed as Jess and Lydia came back out of the bathroom.

"I'll make you some ginger tea." Jess kissed her temple and headed to the kitchen, while Lydia joined the girls on the sofa.

"Where's Math?"

"Getting Chinese. All pork." Lily smiled, wiping the smudged mascara from under Lydia's eye.

"Good. Tell me, why was I excited about this pregnancy thing?"

"The baby at the end." Rory smiled.

"Right. Well the amount of trouble Peanut is giving me now, they better be really quiet when they get here."

"Well you've a fifty fifty chance it'll take after Jess." Rory laughed.

"It better. If it takes after me, it'll never shut up." Lydia sighed, lying her head on Lily's shoulder as Jess exited the kitchen, a cup of tea in his hand.

"Are you finally admitting you talk to much?"

"Never!" Lydia sat up and took the tea from him. "I talk a perfectly average amount. It just seem like a lot to you because you are very quiet."

"Ever think that I just seem quiet because I can't get a word in edgewise?"

"No." Lydia scoffed.

"Yeah, Jess, it's not like you were all chat when we dated." Rory tapped his leg with her foot.

"What makes you think I could get in a word with you either Gilmore?"

"God, your husband's mean."

"I know, he sucks." Lydia agreed, "But I kinda like him," she placed a kiss on his cheek, "he's so cute!"

"Oh jeez, enough." Jess protested as Mathew came in.

"Chinese?"

"Yes! I'm starving!" Lydia grinned.

"You're one weird girl, Murphy." Jess told her, shaking his head.

"And you love it. Go help him." She nudged him with her elbow. "Oh and can I get a glass of lemonade. With two icecubes."

"Two?"

"Yeah, Peanut's very picky. It's your kid." She shrugged and handed him back the empty cup. "Thanks."

"I still can't believe that they're gonna be parents." Mathew wrapped his arm around Rory's shoulder as the walked back to Truncheon after dinner.

"I know."

"I mean, not Lydia, I think she was born to be somebody's mom. She's always looking after everyone, but Jess?"

"I know, he never seemed the paternal type. There were these kids, when we were in high school who worshiped the ground Jess walked on. The Banyons, Jake and Gavin, they were twins, they were eight and Jess was their hero. He pulled a lot of pranks and they couldn't get enough. And the amount of times I caught Jess cussing them out? He couldn't stand being around them."

"Jess was someone's hero?"

"Yip. Though the students have surpassed the master. The Banyons have been banned from being in the town square after dark. Jess was never banned. Though they did try it."

"They tried to ban Jess from town?" Mathew raised one eyebrow as he opened the door of Truncheon, standing aside to let Rory in first.

"Yeah." Rory laughed, tucking her hair behind her ear, and headed up the stairs. "Jess faked a murder, so obviously Taylor had grievance, and that sent Luke into rant mode. I then got annoyed at Jess, and Jess then fixed a toaster."

"Jess fixed a toaster?" Mathew asked as Rory pushed open the door of the apartment.

"Yeah, it was an apology thing. He denied it of course. Said the toaster just got better."

"Sounds like Jess I know and love." Mathew chuckled as they headed to his room, "Never taking credit were it's deserved. The man's too self depricating."

"Yeah." Rory nodded and sat on the edge of the bed.

"You okay?" Mathew sat beside her and placed his finger under her chin, and titled her head up. "Hey what happened?" He asked when he saw she was crying.

"Nothing, it's stupid." She tried to laugh, wiping away her tears.

"It's not stupid if it's got you upset."

"I never thanked him."

"For fixing the toaster?"

"No." Rory shook her head. "For getting me to go back to Yale."

"Yeah, he mentioned that you'd dropped out of school. Right after he came back from Hartford. We had get him blind drunk of course, and he didn't make much sense. And we didn't know who you were."

"Yeah, I was pretty clueless. And he called me out on it. I did try to thank him once. I send him a postcard on the campaign trail from Texas. San Antonio, actually. There was a gaint pair of cowboy boots on the card. I told him that I'd never have seen the gaint boots without him. It was silly. But it was easier than calling."

"Did he get in touch after that?"

"Kind of. He sent a postcard to my mom's house. It had just five printed words on it, and he didn't sign it, but the picture on the front was The Liberty Bell, so I figured it was him."

"What did it say?"

Rory sighed and bit down on her lower lip before answering. "You did it yourself Gilmore."

"Well he's right." Mathew cupped her cheek in his hand, "He yelled at you. You got yourself back in school. You worked to graduate on time. You got the job."

"I guess. Sorry for getting all weepy on you It happens from time to time when I remember what a moron I was."

"Hey, your human. We all screw up."

"Sorry for all the Jess talk too. You don't need to hear that."

"I knew you and Jess had a past when I got into this thing. Don't sweat it."

"You're sweet." Rory smiled.

"So no more Jess talk?" Mathew asked, leaning into Rory and kissing her.

"No." She smiled as she pushed him back onto the bed and straddled him,her knees at either side of his hips. "In fact, no more talking, period."

"I like that plan." Mathew grinned as Rory bent forward and kissed him again.

"No! This is completely unacceptable!"

Rory was wakened the next morning at nine by the sound of Chris' voice. She sat up and found herself alone in Mathew's bed. She slipped on his shirt from the night before and left the room to find Chris pacing the living room, shouting at someone on the phone, while Mathew watched him from the couch. When Mathew spotted her hovering at his bedroom door, he quickly stood and nodded his head towards the kitchen, indicating for Rory to follow him.

"What's going on?" Rory whispered when they reached the kitchen.

"One of our regular columnists hasn't emailed their piece for the 'zine, and Chris is getting anxious." Mathew explained as Chris reached the kitchen door and hung up the phone.

"He quit!"

"What?"

"Yip. He's moving to Wisconsin with his girlfriend."

"Who the hell moves to Wisconsin?" Mathew asked no one in particular, sinking into a kitchen chair and resting his head in his hands.

"This blows. We have a full page to fill, and less than five hours to find some content. Do we have any freelances we could call?"

"No, they all have pieces in this issue."

"Any of your poets have any new material we could print?" Chris sounded desperate.

"Uh, guys?" Rory finally spoke up. "You do realise you have a journalist in your kitchen, right?"

"But you write about politics." Chris told her.

"I didn't always." Rory smiled, pouring herself a cup of coffee and standing behind Mathew's chair, running one hand through his hair. "I could knock you out an opinion piece?"

"That would be great!" Chris grinned, picking up the phone again. "I can try to get the printing deadline pushed back to three instead of two. I'll let you know. You're a lifesaver Rory!" He left the room, dialing as he went.

"You sure about this?" Mathew turned his head to look at his girlfriend.

"Yeah, I am. I just need a laptop and two hours tops." She smiled, bending forward to kiss him. "Oh and a lot more coffee." She whispered before standing up straight and heading back to the living room. "I can use your computer, right?"

"Never Judge a Book by its Cover Praise." Chris read the title of Rory's article before looking up at her.

"It's about how you should read a book because you think it sounds interesting, not because the blurb says it's amazing." Rory explained as Chris read the article.

"Well, it seems good. Great, even. You really helped us out Rory. Thanks again."

"It's no problem. But shouldn't you be proofing that. I know I'm good, but I'm not perfect."

"Oh, Jess is proofing it."

"Jess?" Rory asked as he came out of his office.

"Seriously Gilmore, you have to get over this Hemingway phobia."

"It's not a phobia. And 'The Sun Also Rises' was right in front of me, proclaiming that it's 'brilliant', whereas when I read it, I wanted to throw it out the window."

"Philistine." Jess muttered before turning to Chris. "I've sent you the edited article. Nothing major, just a few misplaced commas, and a randomly capitalized 'never'. But it's really good. You should consider giving her the column if Don's really gone."

"Seriously?" Rory gasped.

"Yeah. You've a unique voice Rory. I've always said that."

"Well thank you. But I have a job, remember?"

"You should think about it though. It's only two pieces a month, on something other than politics."

"Don't I have to think about giving her the job?" Chris asked.

"You know you want to." Jess smirked as he put on his jacket. "I have to run. Lydia phoned about thirty minutes ago demanding pickles."

"So, do you want the gig?" Chris asked Rory as Mathew came downstairs.

"What gig?"

"Jess thinks we should give Rory Don's column."

"Really? I think that's a great idea."

"You do?" Rory enquired.

"Sure. I mean it can't hurt your portfolio, and if it's too much workload, we can always find someone else."

"Okay, I'll do it." Rory smiled as Mathew pulled her into a hug.

"Really? Rory you are my hero!" Chris laughed as he emailed the finished 'zine content to the printer.

"So, you've a new job?"

"Not a new job, it's a side project, mom. Two extra articles a month. No big deal."

"Okay, if you say so. Anyway, how's Mathew?"

"He's good. We're going to see a movie later. It sucks I don't get to see him during the week, and then he works a lot when I'm here." Rory sighed, as she flipped through the channels of the muted TV.

"Long distance sucks, huh?"

"Big time."

"Oh, how's Lydia doing?"

"Glowing. Though a lot a nausea. I feel bad for her. And Jess, he keeps saying the wrong thing."

"I'm still weirded out at the thought of Jess tackling parenthood."

"Really? I think he'll be a great dad. Oh listen mom, I gotta go. Mathew just came in, and I'm not even nearly ready to leave."

"Okay, well give everyone my love. I'll talk to you later kid."

"Yeah, bye mom." Rory smiled and hung up the phone.

"We don't need to leave for another three hours," Mathew grinned, checking his watch, "so, unless we're going to the movie's premier, you don't need that long to get ready."

"I know." Rory smiled, standing up and wrapping her arms around his neck. "But I figured we could do something else with the time." She peppered kisses along his jawline.

"God, you're eager this weekend."

"Problem?" Rory pulled back and pouted.

"Not even in the slightest." He grinned, sweeping her up into his arms and carrying her to his room.

"Jess?" Lydia wandered from their room at ten past midnight, when she had woke up to find Jess absent from their bed. She found him on the couch, the only light in the room coming from one small side lamp and his laptop.

"Lydia?" He looked up and then saved his document before closing the computer when he saw her. "What are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep. Had a nightmare about Peanut. I gave birth and it was a giant peanut, with legs and arms." She told him as she sat beside him.

"What?" Jess laughed as he sat his laptop on the coffee table. "That's crazy!"

"I know, but it really freaked me out."

"You know that it's impossible for you to give birth to a peanut, right?"

"Yes." She sighed, resting her head on his chest.

"Good. Freak out over?" He kissed the crown of her head.

"Freak out over." She confirmed. "Hey, are you writing again?" She pointed to the laptop.

"Yeah, kind of."

"Kind of? For how long? Can I read it?" She sat up, grinning.

"I've been writing again for a few months, but you can't read it. It's nowhere near ready."

"But when it is?"

"Sure." Jess bobbed his head once.

"Good. I'm glad your writing. You're too talented to waste it editing other people's work."

"Thank you. I think."

"It was a compliment." Lydia laughed. "Hey, babe? You know we're going to have to move, right?"

"Yeah, I was thinking that myself. This place is too small for all three of us and a baby."

"So, we'll start looking soon?"

"Yeah, tomorrow, first thing." Jess placed a soft kiss on her forehead. "Now back to bed."

"You coming?"

"In a minute. Just want to finish something." Jess picked up his laptop again.

"Okay, but don't be too long." Lydia requested.

"I won't." He promised, as he started to type again.

Shorter, I know, but it's exam season, so I thought a shorter chapter is better than no chapter, right?

Reviews are love in an elevator!