Haha... I'm not sure how good this chappie is, so don't kill me.

Also, I wrote it all in about four days... it just takes a while for my motivation to build up.

The first chapter got more reviews than the second... Is that a bad thing? XD

Hahah, anyways, basically this story may be updated before the week is over if I get a bunch of reviews. It isn't that hard, just type a sentence or two and press a button. It would mean so, so , soooo much to me as somewhat of a noob when it comes to writing.

Oh, and my fanfic called Apology... I will be changing its name and description. I haven't given up on it at all, but for the time being it's more of a side-project than anything, so I am very sorry about the utter lack of attention I'm giving it.

Anways, hopefully you guys will enjoy this chapter~

"Oh, hey Shizuo. Welcome back," Shinra smiled, waving to his guest.

Shizuo, who was still in somewhat of an aftershock wasn't quite sure how to respond. Fumbling for words, he seemed incapable of actually talking. Luckily for him, Shinra continued the basically one-sided conversation perfectly well himself.

"Celty told me about what happened this morning," a serious expression formed on the doctor's face, "If you really want to know about him, we decided you have the right to know. But I'm warning you, if you learn the truth about this man, your life will never be the same again."

The underground doctor spoke of this man sullenly… of Izaya… As if he was a nuisance, an insect that was better off gone. Shinra made it so Izaya seemed to be a bad person. Shizuo didn't like it. He didn't like where this was going at all. It became obvious to him that his friends didn't want him to know about Izaya. It hurt.

Shizuo couldn't do anything about the constriction in his chest; he had found someone who may hold the key to his past, the final piece of the puzzle… And the people he trusted most were pulling him away.

If they were going to portray Izaya as the bad guy, Shizuo stubbornly decided hi didn't want to hear it. They could think what they wanted; Shizuo knew everything had to be more than they thought… It had to be deeper than that.

The blonde smiled weakly, half hoping to depict himself as nonchalant.

"It's okay, Shinra. I don't need to know."

The brunet looked questioning, unknowingly urging his blonde friend to hastily change subjects.

"A-anyways, I got you this." Shizuo handed Shinra the paper bag he had earned earlier on that day.

"A gift? For me? You shouldn't have!"

Shizuo chuckled a little. He was glad the heavy atmosphere was seemingly gone, or at least dissipating.

"It was the least I could do. I mean, you've done so much for me these past few months and… I haven't really been that grateful."

"Shizuo, this was really unnecessary. Haha, that's what friends are for, right?" despite his words, the doctor looked inside the bag and drooled at the sight of the confectionaries it held.

The brunet smiled and dragged Shizuo over to his couch.

"But these do look pretty good," Shinra said taking a bite out of a sugar cookie, "want some?"

"Sure," Shizuo reached a large hand into the bag and pulled out a cookie for himself.

The room was overtaken in a comfortable silence apart from the sounds of munching and chewing accompanied by the occasional swallow.

Having some time to sort out his thoughts, Shizuo found himself wondering why he couldn't remember what he wanted to the most. The memories couldn't have simply vanished, so why wouldn't they come back to him if they were still there?

This was something completely out of Shizuo's realm of knowledge. Even though doctor's spent hours explaining him his condition within the confinement of hospital walls, Shizuo could barely say he so much as got the gist of it.

Besides, it didn't matter as much to him then as it did now. Knowing that his memories would reveal who Izaya was gave them a whole new level of importance.

Shizuo knew he could probably ask Shinra about this, but… Would the doctor be reluctant to tell him? Shizuo had been getting the feeling that there were parts of his past that had been hidden from him. The thought was sinister, something like the plot of a mystery/thriller film. It was for that reason that Shizuo decided the thought didn't matter for now. Even if it was true, these people… Shinra, Celty, Tom, Kasuka… They were very dear to him hand therefore deserved his trust.

Shizuo stuffed what was left of his cookie into his mouth, chewing and swallowing it. After wiping his mouth clean of any crumbs, he broke the silence that had previously invaded the apartment.

"Shinra, I've been thinking… if I still have my memories somewhere in my head, why won't they come back to me?"

Shinra seemed a little shocked at the sudden question but recovered almost instantly.

"Wow, that's quite the question, Shizuo," the doctor exclaimed, " It's also quite complex, so I'll try to answer in a way that's easy to understand. Simply put, there are various ways to lose your memories and regaining them just takes a bit of time in most cases. Sometimes a trauma can make you suffer from selective memory loss and forget only things about a certain individual, place or thing. You lost your memory due to a rather strong impact against the back of your head, so it's most likely that the memories you will have the most trouble recovering are those closest to the timespan in which you head was injured," the underground doctor pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "does that make any sense?

Shizuo creased his eyebrows slightly and nodded to show he had understood. This sure made more sense now than it did a few months ago, but Shinra was pretty vague on how you could regain your memories, which was pretty much all the blonde needed to know. Unsatisfied, Shizuo continued to query the brunet sitting across from him.

"You said it just takes time to regain lost memories, but are there any other ways? Ways for that don't involve sitting around doing nothing apart from waiting?"

Shinra sighed. "I suppose that visiting familiar people and places as well as reproducing physical actions your body recognises would help, but nothing can be certain when it comes to memories. In a nutshell, all you can do is wait."

"But-"

"Shizuo," Shinra put his hand on said man's shoulder. "Your past will come back to you in due time. Stop stressing over all this; it'll do you no good. What your body needs more than ever now is rest. Please, just try to relax."

The doctor's words ticked the blonde off.

" 'In due time', you say? And when exactly is that? In a couple days? A couple weeks? Hey, how about a couple years?"

"Shizu-"

"No, okay? Don't, Shinra. I know you're only trying to be supportive, but you have no idea what I'm going through."

As the brunet's eyes calmed down a little, he looked his friend in the eyes.

"Shizuo, I've been in love with someone missing her memories for twenty years; I think I know more about your situation than you give me credit for."

Shizuo slapped Shinra's hand off of his shoulder.

"NO! NO, you don't! Celty's a dullahan, she has an eternity to retrieve her lost memories! I'm just a human, okay! I DON'T WANT TO LET OPORTUNITIES SLIP THROUGH MY HANDS JUST BECAUSE I CAN'T REMEMBER WHO SOMEONE IS!"

Shizuo panted, regaining his breath and hoping to have made a point. It wasn't out of malice or anger that he had lashed out at his friend, but out of sheer sorrow and desperation. He wanted to understand his own life… He had so many questions that needed to be answered. It was all he could do not to break down here and now.

The blonde bit his bottom lip, holding in tears threatening to escape. It could have just been his impaired vision, but Shinra's eyes seemed to have softened even more than they had previously been. The brunet seemed to be taken aback, exposed to a reality completely different from his own.

It was Shizuo's turn to be taken aback as Shinra pulled him into a friendly embrace.

"I-I'm sorry for not understanding how hard this was for you sooner… But, I still honestly think the best thing you can do right now is try to relax. You might regret not living as who you are now once your memories return."

Shizuo bit his bottom lip. He didn't know if it was the physical affection, the comforting words or all the confusion that had been plaguing him recently, but for the first time since he woke up in the hospital three months back, he cried.

He wasn't sobbing hysterically, in fact, he wasn't even crying out of sadness. The tears that fell from his tired eyes were simply releasing all the pressure that the blonde had been holding over his shoulders. The stress he had suffered was so great Shizuo felt as if he became pounds lighter as each drop of warm, salty liquid escaped his eyes.

Shinra patted the blonde's back awkwardly.

"Hey man… I didn't mean it that way… If you don't want time to take its toll, I can try to help you out… Just please… Don't cry."

Shizuo smiled at how awkward the doctor sounded, pulling himself out of the other's arms and wiping away a few stray tears with the back of his hands.

"No, it's not that at all, I was just… happy that you and Celty are here for me and doing so much to help," Shizuo laughed slightly as a couple more tears rolled down his cheek. "Sorry, I-I didn't mean to cry like that," the tall, sentimental blonde excused himself, wiping away a few fresh tears

Shinra smiled sadly, seemingly out of some sort of innocent guilt.

"Don't worry about it, I'm sure things haven't been easy for you."

Shizuo chuckled, taking in a deep breath of air.

"I'm not lying… I don't know what I'd do without you two."

The brunet couldn't help but feel unworthy of all his friend's praise. He did, after all, know quite a bit of the things that Shizuo wanted more than ever to know.

"Haha, I really don't think you need us that much," Shinra protested cheerily, scratching the back of his head.

Shizuo smiled, getting up from the couch and making his way over to the door.

"Think what you want, but you guys are practically family to me," the underground doctor seemed pleasantly surprised hearing this, "tell Celty I said hi, and… Enjoy your sweets."

And with that, Shizuo shut the door and headed over to his own apartment, feeling much lighter than he had felt for months.

TO ALL WHO REVIEWED, I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH I WANT TO CRY!

Akemi: Thanks so much for the lovely review. I do enjoy knowing what my readers think of my stories. Suggestions and such are always appreciated as well XD Hopefully this update wan't too late. ˆ ˆ;;

Simply Emotional: Awwwwm, thanks so much dear! ; 3 ; That means a lot to me.