A Bad Mission
Chapter V -'This One's for Play'

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and you're stupid if you thought if one second I did. : )
Warning: This fic has both shounen-ai (and maybe some yaoi, I haven't decided yet) and cross-dressing. If those things offend you I suggest you not read it because if I get any mail complaining that I have guys kissing each other then I'm going to kick the sender's ass.

Rating For Story: Rated 'T' until farther notified (I might change it to 'M', so beware for that.)

Pairings For This Chapter: A little onsided NarutoSakura and some onesided SakuraSasuke

"You go first, Kazuko," Sakura demanded, looking toward her new friend, "It was your idea."

They were all sitting on the floor in a circle, chairs and couches forgotten, in the middle of Naruto and Sasuke's dorm living room.

"Okay," Kazuko agreed happily. "My turn…Emiko, truth or dare?"

"Dare," Naruto said bravely, grinning like a maniac.

"Alright," Kazuko accepted, "I dare you to…to call up a guy you know and have phone sex with him," the girl decided. "He can't be a boyfriend though," she added as an afterthought.

Iruka sat down on his couch, relaxing for the first time in quite awhile. He had just gone out with Kakashi for a friendly visit and the sake he had been talked into drinking was overcoming his body. His head was buzzing and the worries he normally had were all chased away by the slight buzz his head was giving off.

Briiiiing Briiiiing Briiiiing

Iruka was woken up from his mild daze by the sounding of his phone. He calmly got up from his couch and picked it up, not really caring who it might be for the first time in quite awhile, perhaps even his whole life.

"Hello?" he greeted happily with an idiotic smile plastered on his face.

"Hey Gorgeous," the voice greeted in return. "Are you busy?"

"Nope," Iruka said indifferently, not really registering how sexy the voice from the phone sounded. "Why?" he asked, just mildly curious.

"Well I would have thought that was obvious," the voice said. "You see, I'm all alone in my bedroom and I was getting lonely. I thought maybe you could cheer me up," the voice explained.

"Of course I'll help you," Iruka accepted. He always tried to be as much help as possibly. "What do you want me to do?"

The voice gave a small, flirtatious, one syllable giggle. "Well I already told you, Handsome," the answer answered, "I'm all alone, completely without clothes in a bed. Tell me what you plan to do."

"Mmm…" Iruka thought. "I'd probably take off my clothes and join you, if you wouldn't mind that," he answered reasonably.

"If it was you?" the voice asked. "I wouldn't mind at all. In fact I think I would help you get undress. Then I'd start to kiss you," the voice answered. "What would you do then?"

"I'd kiss you back of course," Iruka answered, "That's the gentlemanly thing to do. Then I'd…then I'd move down and suck your neck."

"Oooh, I like the sound of that," the voice answered, "In fact in appreciation I think I'd go down a bit farther and start to lick your penis."

The voice was met with a silence on Iruka's end of the phone. He had just fallen asleep.

"I think he fell asleep," Naruto said, blushing greatly as he hung up the phone.

"I can't believe you were that boring to him," Sasuke laughed, smirking at his teammate. "And here I thought that Iruka would jump at the chance to get you in bed."

"Sh-shut up, Katsumi!" Naruto yelled. "It's my turn now and I chose you," he announced, pointing to Sasuke. "Truth or dare?" he asked.

"Dare," Sasuke decided without a moment's hesitation.

"Good," Naruto accepted, smiling wickedly. "I dare you to call up Kakashi, state your name, and then tell him you love him," Naruto challenged, smiling proudly at his dare.

"F-fine," Sasuke agreed, mentally kicking himself for picking 'dare' instead of 'truth'.

Kakashi went into his apartment with a happy smile on his face. He had just got back from treating Iruka to sake and the guy had finally loosened up slightly. Needless to say the ninja was quite proud of himself.

The masked man stretched and threw himself onto his couch that immediately molded into his body. Beaming proudly at his accomplishment for the day he took out his latest Flirting Paradise book. Kakashi's smile became two times as bright when he looked down at his book. He had gotten it three days before it was supposed to come out.

Briiiiing Briiiiing Briiiiing

His phone interrupted his reading, telling him someone wanted him for some reason or another. Kakashi sighed and reluctantly put down his book and picked up the yelling phone.

"This better be good, you interrupted the best part of my book," Kakashi stated into the phone, instead of the normal greeting polite people (like Iruka) gave.

"Kakashi?" the voice on the other end asked hesitantly.

"Yes," Kakashi answered with irritation. He wanted to get this conversation over with so he could return to his book.

"Uh…this is Katsumi," the voice on the other phone said, pausing, waiting for Kakashi to say something.

"Sasuke?" Kakashi asked, knowing Katsumi was the female name his student was going by while he was in enrolled in the all girls' boarding school.

"Yes," Sasuke admitted after a few moments of silence. He quieted again, waiting for his gray haired teacher to speak.

"What is it?" the masked ninja asked, afraid something bad might have happened. "Did someone get hurt? Did something happen to you three?"

"No," Sasuke answered, "Everything's fine over here." Then he paused again, waiting for the other man to speak again.

When he didn't Sasuke continued. "I-I just called you to say…uh…" Sasuke tried to say, pausing for a moment to organize his thoughts.

"What is it, Sasuke?" Kakashi asked, now growing annoyed at the time the Uchiha was taking up. He wanted to read his book, damn it.

"I called to tell you…" Sasuke repeated. "…To tell you that I…I love you," Sasuke finally got out.

Silence fell on both males. Sasuke, because of his embarrassment and Kakashi, because of his surprise.

"Well, uh," Kakashi finally said, his thoughts no longer on his new book but on the problem Sasuke had just thrown at him. "That's quite a bit of knowledge," he admitted, "It's, uh…good to know."

When Sasuke said nothing back the teacher racked his brain for something else to say. "And I uhm…like you too," Kakashi said, "As much as a teacher can like his student, I mean."

"I see," Sasuke finally spoke, "Thank you, Kakashi. I have to go now." And without another word from his teacher Sasuke hung up the phone.

Kakashi didn't get to read his new Flirting Paradise book. He was too busy thinking about what Sasuke had said and whether or not he said the right thing in response.

"There," Sasuke said, hanging up the phone with a slight blush on his face.

"So what did he say?" Naruto asked excitedly, leaning towards Sasuke so he didn't miss any word of the explanation.

"That wasn't part of the dare," Sasuke said, refusing to answer the blonde boy's question. "You should be more detailed in your dares next time," he said.

"All right Sasuke, it's your turn now," Sakura said quickly in attempts to distract her two teammates from breaking out into a fight. "Whom do you pick?" she asked her crush.

"Kazuko," Sasuke answered with a smirk on his face. "Chose," he commanded, "Truth or dare?"

"Dare," Kazuko decided, undeterred by the other dares that had been decided that evening. "What have you got for me, Katsumi?" she asked with a smile, ready to do anything and everything.

"I dare you to give Emiko a swirly," Sasuke decided quickly, smirking even more, "She can show you where our toilet is."

"No way!" Naruto cried at the injustice of the dare Sasuke had posed for Kazuko, "That's not fair! I already had to call Iruka! How come I get a swirly when it's not even my turn?"

"Sorry, Emiko," Kazuko apologized with a smile on her face. She wasn't sorry at all. "I have to give you a swirly whether you like it or not. I'll use force if necessary," she threatened.

"Fine," Naruto sighed, getting up from his sitting position and walking towards the bathroom, "I'll submit. Come on, the bathroom's this way." Any fight he would have put up would prove he was a ninja and he couldn't bring attention to himself. He didn't have any choice but to let it happen.

A few flushes of the toilet later a smiling Kazuko came back into the living room followed by Naruto with a towel wrapped around his wet head.

"My turn again," Kazuko said with a happy smile on her face. "This time a chose you, Katsumi. Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," Sasuke decided, learning his lesson from last time with Naruto.

"Alright, let's see," Kazuko said, thinking aloud. "Who was your first kiss?"

"My-my first kiss was with Naruto," Sasuke admitted, looking down at the ground and purposefully ignoring Naruto's gaze.

"Are…are you serious?" Naruto asked, astounded the Uchiha hadn't kissed anyone before him even though he had so many fan girls. "But…why? You've had tons of chances before he came along."

"I've been too busy with things of actual importance," Sasuke replied with dignity, "I don't have time to go around kissing people."

"But that kiss was an accident!" Naruto screamed. "It's so pathetic! Your only kiss was an accident and it was by a guy that hates you!"

"I don't care," Sasuke snapped back "I'm not some slut who measures her worth on how many kisses she's received," he explained, inwardly wincing at the fact that he had to refer to himself as a girl.

"You just don't know how to loosen up," Naruto complained, dropping down from his sitting position so that he was lying on his back.

"Fine then Na-Emiko," Sasuke said, almost forgetting to use Naruto's fake name in the heat of his frustration. "Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," Naruto said proudly, giving everyone a self-assured smile, sure that he had foiled whatever plan Sasuke had thought up.

"How many people have you kissed?" Sasuke asked. "And you have to state everyone's name so we know you aren't lying," he added.

"Well…I kissed Sasuke," Naruto answered, suddenly becoming shy, "And…uh…there was…"

"Well there you go," Sasuke said with a little enthusiasm in his voice. "You've received as little action as I have," he declared.

"Shut up," Naruto ordered, lifting his torso up into a sitting position again, crossing his arms across his chest, and pouting out his lips.

"Stop acting so immature," Sakura demanded of both of them. "This game's getting boring, let's play something else," she suggested.

"If we had some guys we could play spin the bottle," Kazuko thought out loud, placing her forefinger to her chin in thought.

"I don't have any problem playing," Naruto declared, secretly hoping that if they played he could kiss Sakura.

"No thanks. You might like girls but the rest of us don't," Kazuko said, writing off the idea.

"We could make each other over," Sakura suggested next, not in much favor of the idea herself. She was just throwing out random thoughts.

"No way," Sasuke said immediately. "I'll run out of make up, I don't have much left," he made up as an excuse.

"Hmm," Naruto said while he thought. "Let's just watch a movie or something." He proposed

"No television, Brainiac," Sasuke said, crushing the idea. He then pulled up his legs to his stomach and hugged his knees, placing his chin on them in an attempt to get more comfortable.

"Did you get a chance to see the new math teacher?" Kazuko asked out of the blue.

"No, I haven't been to the classes' building (1) yet, so I haven't run into any teachers," Sakura explained. "Why?"

"I heard he was unbelievably gorgeous. All the girls I talked to while I was trying to find my dorm were raving about him. Apparently he's drop dead sexy," Kazuko explained with a smile on her face and mischievous eyes. "I thought maybe you might want to heard over there and see if he's there," she suggested.

"It's pretty late," Sasuke said, not liking the idea, "I don't think he'll be over there at this hour."

"Everyone says he's over there all the time," Kazuko insisted, "It's worth a try at least."

"Yeah, come on Katsumi," Sakura said, siding with her new friend. "Emiko's coming, aren't you Emiko?" she asked, turning towards Naruto.

"Are you kidding? Of course I'm coming," Naruto said, standing up with Kazuko and Sakura. He didn't want to disappoint his crush.

"Fine," Sasuke gave in, just wanting something to do. "This is so stupid," he muttered, getting up and following the others out the door and into the hall.

"And the counselor is pretty sexy too," Kazuko said during their walk across the grounds to get to the actual school portion of the campus. "Of course I can't say if he's hotter than the math teacher until I see the competition, but he does rank up there in the sexiest people in the world list," she continued.

"So what about the other teachers?" Sakura asked, wondering what other hot teachers she would be getting during her stay here. It felt good to be surrounded by girls for a while. It was something she missed being teamed up with two boys.

"There aren't many more hot ones," Kazuko admitted sadly, "The other teachers are mostly old hags. Though there is the Geography teacher. He's pretty handsome, but he's super strict. People usually try to steer clear of him."

"Anyone else we should steer clear of?" Naruto asked, hoping for information that could keep him out of trouble in this school.

"The English teacher for our year's a real pervert," Kazuko accused, "I heard he looks down girl's shirts and stuff. I would make sure not to be in the room alone with him if I could help it."

"The door has a lock on it," Naruto pointed out once they had reached the building, even going so far as to actually pointing to the lock with his forefinger to insure everyone saw it.

"Yeah, that's typical," Kazuko said, shrugging indifferently, "The back door's always open though. We can get in that way."

"How sure are you someone's here?" Sasuke asked once they had entered the dark school building through the open back door.

"Someone's always here," Kazuko insisted in a whisper, "So be quiet, we don't want to get caught."

"Wait," Naruto whispered back, realization showing on his face. "Are you implying we aren't allowed to be here?" he asked.

"Um…yes. You didn't seriously think we were allowed in here whenever we wanted, did you?" she answered back, rolling her eyes at the obviousness of the situation.

"I can't see anything," Sakura complained, consciously widening her eyes in attempts to catch any extra light so she could see something, anything.

"Well that wouldn't be a problem if you were following the rules," a voice in the dark answered her.

Immediately the quartet ran in all different directions, fearing to be caught and put in detention before even the first day of school.

Unfortunately for Sasuke (and fortunately for the rest of the group) he ran right into the unidentified man who had spoken to them through the darkness.

Sasuke's undignified "Oof" was followed by a distinguished "Nice to meet you too," as the unidentified man pressed Sasuke into a hug, allowing no escape for the poor Uchiha.

"Come on," the man said, pulling a struggling Sasuke into a nearby classroom.

"So," the man said, locking the door and turning on a light while his back was facing his captive. "Let's see who this intruder is, shall we?" he asked, turning towards Sasuke. "Ah, and it's a pretty girl, I see," he said with mock astonishment, "Well who would have thought it."

The man was very handsome, even Sasuke had to admit it. He had long blonde hair drawn together in a lose braid. He was skinny, but muscular, much like Sasuke was, except that his face was manlier. It wasn't as smooth as Sasuke's, it was more square. His eyes were bright green, unlike anything Sasuke had ever seen.

"You must be the math teacher," Sasuke guessed, smirking a little at figuring it out without anyone having to tell him.

"I am," the man admitted, "What gave me away?"

"I heard you were a handsome teacher in an ocean of hags," Sasuke answered, "It was pretty obvious."

"Well I'm flattered," the man replied, "My name's Akihiro but I guess you'll be referring to me as Suzuki-Sensei.'

Sasuke wanted very badly to say, 'Yes, and my name's Sasuke Uchiha but you'll be referring to me as Katsumi-Chan,' but he pressed that desire down into him and responded instead by saying, "I'm pleased to meet you, Suzuki-Sensei. You may call me Katsumi-Chan."

"Oh, now you're just being nice so you won't get into trouble," Akihiro indicted with a sarcastic tint to his voice.

"What gave me away?" Sasuke asked, repeating the teacher's question with a sarcastic air to his voice, smirking slightly.

"Ah, I see how it is," Akihiro said, laughing slightly. "I finally find someone who doesn't just squeal and run away and she turns out to be a bully," he complained.

"You've been squealed at already?" Sasuke asked, not able to keep the amusement from his voice. "I feel for you," he empathized.

"Oh yes, I can tell," Akihiro accepted sarcastically, smiling at his new student for the year.

"No really," Sasuke insisted, dropping the amusement from his voice and the smile from his face. "I know what it feels like to be squealed at and idolized. People think it'd be fun, but it's pure hell."

"Are you trying to tell me that girls squeal at you?" Suzuki asked with a smile pulling at his lips.

"Well uh…sometimes when I hang out with my brother he dresses me as a boy, because he doesn't want any rumors going around that he has a girlfriend. Girls would always squeal at how cute I was. I even had my own fan club for awhile," Sasuke explained.

It was somewhat true at least. Itachi had often dressed him as a girl, pretending they were going out, holding hands, going out on pretend dates, luckily it hadn't gone past pecks on the cheek. His brother was warped, he knew that now, but he used to love it when he was little and didn't understand the sin behind such acts. It made Itachi focus on him and appreciate him. It had made him feel worth something to his brother, when normally Itachi didn't give him a second thought.

And his experience as a boy was quite what he described. The girls, the squealing, and the fan clubs were all reality for him back in Konoha.

"And you do that, huh?" the teacher asked him, bringing Sasuke back to the present. "So tell me, how cute of a boy are you?"

"Not that I ever tried to be cute," Sasuke answered, "I'm not very interested in girls." It wasn't until the sentence was out of his mouth that he really thought about it. Fortunately it fit his situation just fine at the present time, though he would truly have to ponder the implication of what he said at a later time, preferably when he was alone and not in a room with a gorgeous guy.

"Yes well, I'm not either," Suzuki admitted, "So you can understand the difficulty I have in my position."

"No way," Sasuke breathed. "I wouldn't have ever guessed you were gay," he admitted.

"Yep, bring me a handsome guy and I'll be more than happy to prove it to you," Akihiro said with laughter in his voice.

"Sounds tempting," Sasuke said before he even thought the words. He had been talking about himself as the handsome guy, but the math teacher (fortunately) took it as a girl trying to get permission to see two boys making out.

Akihiro laughed again, taking it as another sarcastic comment by his present favorite student. "But on to more important things," Suzuki said, dropping his laughter and putting on a serious face. "What were you doing at this building before school hours began?" he asked.

"I was dragged here by some idiots that wanted to see if you were really as hot as people kept saying you were," Sasuke answered truthfully.

"Well I can't really blame you for that," the man laughed. "Get out of here so you can tell your friends how hot I really am. All charges for sneaking into the school are dropped."

"Really?" Sasuke asked, not believing his luck, "What changed your mind?"

"I just can't bring myself to give cross dressers detention," the teacher answered sarcastically, "They remind me too much of myself I guess."

At first Sasuke was shocked still. Luckily he remembered the story he had told the teacher about Itachi. Suzuki was talking about him as a girl dressing up like a guy, not him as a boy dress up like a girl.

"You don't cross dress," Sasuke assumed, getting back on topic and smirking a little.

"Yes I do," Akihiro insisted. "Next time I'll invite you along and we can go on a date, how 'bout it?" he asked.

"Sounds fun," Sasuke accepted. "I can't wait," he added, unlocking the door and stepping out into the dark hall and out the back door into the now moonlit outside.

1- quite obviously the wing of the school where the actual learning goes on