Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or any of these characters… if I did, Karofsky wouldn't exist anymore, Jesse wouldn't have been such an asshole (albeit one I believe legitimately fell for Rachel), and there would be a LOT more Blaine.
A/n: Alright… I FINALLY have an update for all of you! I'm sorry about the long wait; between vacation, work, and trying to get my school situation for the fall figured out, I haven't really had a lot of time to write. And what time I've had has been focused mainly on the novel I've spent the last year and a half working on that I just recently scrapped and started over from scratch. Which is going pretty well, actually – I almost have as many words now as I did on my original draft, and I spent about 4 months on that one. The second draft (which has been pretty much completely rewritten) has been worked on for less than a month. Anyways… onto the new chapter!
Blaine watched silently as the nurse stuck a needle into his arm. "Is this really necessary?" Blaine asked. He didn't particularly like needles, and they had already drawn a lot of blood for other tests.
"I'm just following the doctor's orders, sweetie. Given your family history, it's probably better to have more information…" the nurse began. Blaine closed his eyes, trying to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach as the nurse worked. That had started not long after he'd woken up, and it only seemed to be getting worse. "We still need to get a chest x-ray, too, to help rule out any kind of infection."
"But my chest doesn't hurt…"
"That doesn't mean that there couldn't be something wrong… the more information we have, the easier it will be to make a diagnosis. Just trust me on this one." Blaine nodded, bending his elbow once the nurse removed the needle to help stop the bleeding. He didn't particularly want to be at a doctor's office in town, but the nurse at the school infirmary had insisted that Blaine be seen by an actual doctor as soon as she'd heard his symptoms.
The nurse finally left Blaine alone in the exam room; the secretary from the school office that had driven him to the doctor had stayed out in the waiting room for privacy reasons, and Blaine had brought a book because he had known that it would be a while. He got off the exam table once she was gone, settling into the only other chair in the room with the book he was still working on for his English class.
It seemed like ages before the doctor actually came into the room, but once he was there the man didn't waste any time getting right to the point. "We need to get you into the hospital, at least overnight. You're pretty seriously dehydrated, and your blood sugar is elevated… I'm worried that you might be suffering from diabetic ketoacidosis." Blaine shook his head, closing his eyes and trying to fight back the tears.
"But I'm not diabetic…"
"Blaine, it's definitely a possibility. Which is why we need to really look into this, to make sure that we take care of your symptoms and get you healthy."
"I need to get back to school… I have too much to do this week, and I'm already behind…" Blaine began.
"Blaine, this is a medical emergency. I know you don't want to think about it, but the reality is that whatever is going on could be fatal. You're only going to get worse… I can't let you go back to school like this."
"I can't…" Blaine shook his head, still trying to process everything. "Diabetes?" The doctor put a hand on his shoulder.
"I think so… we still need to run some more tests, but I don't see any other possible explanations. And given the fact that you have a family history of the disease, that would be a logical explanation for all of your symptoms." Blaine finally nodded, sighing.
"Okay… I'll go," Blaine replied.
"I'm going to go call the hospital to let them know you're coming, and I'll explain everything to Miss Johnson. Are you okay?" Blaine nodded in response, pulling out his cell phone.
"I just…" Blaine began. He couldn't finish; Blaine was too upset to get the words out.
"I understand… you need a minute." Blaine glanced down at the screen of his phone as the doctor left him alone, scrolling quickly through his contact list until it hit the one number he knew he needed to call. He didn't want to scare anyone; Blaine knew that as soon as Burt and Carole heard that the doctor wanted to put him in the hospital, at least one of them would drop everything and rush to Westerville. He didn't want to cause them any more grief, but Blaine knew that they needed to know what was going on.
The phone only rang a couple of times before Burt picked up the phone. "Hummel Tire and Lube, Burt speaking."
"Mr. Hummel… it's Blaine…"
"Something wrong, kid? Shouldn't you be in class right now?" Blaine sighed, closing his eyes again. He didn't want to do this; he didn't want to screw up everyone else's lives again.
"I'm at the doctor's office. They… they want to put me in the hospital…"
"Okay, kid… tell me what's going on. Why are they putting you in the hospital? Does it have something to do with all of the meds you're taking?"
"No… it's not the meds. The doctor thinks I might be diabetic. He said they still needed to run some more tests to be sure, but that he can't think of another explanation…"
"Okay… I'm going to call Carole before she goes to work, and we're going to figure something out so that you don't have to be alone. Just hang in there, and do whatever the doctor tells you. Let him figure out what's going on so that we can get you better." Blaine nodded, even though Burt couldn't see him.
"I'll be okay, Burt… you don't have to change everything for me…"
"You just need to worry about getting some rest and getting better. Not about anyone else," Burt replied. "Don't worry too much… you're going to be okay, understand? The doctors are going to take care of you."
"Okay… I just need to tell Kurt what's going on…"
"Okay. Just take care of yourself."
If there was one thing Kurt really hated about Dalton, it was the fact that all of the teachers would take away cell phones the moment they saw them. Under normal circumstances it wouldn't have been an issue, but his English teacher refused to give the phone back until the end of the school day despite the fact that Kurt had tried to explain that he was waiting to hear from Blaine. He'd only gotten the phone out because he'd thought he'd felt it vibrate.
"So, what did the doctor say about Blaine?" Kurt sighed as Wes asked the question. Blaine's friends all knew by now that the nurse in the school's infirmary had sent him to the doctor's office in town. Which pretty much everyone at Dalton knew was a bad sign; the nurse could take care of just about anything, and she only sent students who were potentially really sick to see someone off-campus.
"If I knew, I would tell you. But my phone got taken away in English class and I couldn't get it back until after last period. You haven't heard anything?" Kurt figured that if anyone was going to hear from Blaine besides himself, it would be Wes or David. And since David wasn't currently available due to being out of town with the debate team, Wes was the logical choice.
"No… I'm surprised he hasn't texted me trying to figure out why you aren't responding…" Wes replied. "We should probably go get your phone before he starts freaking out."
The two boys hurried down to the English classroom and Kurt left Wes waiting just outside the room as he went in to get his phone. The teacher wasn't happy at all, but she handed over the phone with a warning that she had better not ever see him with it out again.
Kurt had approximately half a dozen messages waiting for him, mostly from Blaine. Kurt was surprised to find that one of the messages was from Carole's cell phone. He clicked on the oldest message from Blaine.
Call me when you get a chance… they're sending me to the hospital. :( Kurt bit down on his bottom lip as he read over the rest of the messages, doing his best not to freak out about the fact that his boyfriend was currently in a hospital bed.
"Everything okay?" Wes asked. Kurt shook his head, sighing.
"I have to get to the hospital… I don't know what's going on, but it really doesn't sound good," Kurt replied.
"I'll go with you. We should take him some stuff to keep him entertained… did he say how long they want to keep him?" Kurt shook his head.
"He didn't say. I'm not sure if they know yet… Blaine didn't say anything about why they were putting him in the hospital. I'm worried…"
"I'm sure he'll be okay in a few days… let's go get his computer and some of his movie collection. And Harry Potter – he always wants to watch those movies when he doesn't feel well." Kurt smiled slightly, grateful that his boyfriend had friends who cared enough to remember things like what movies Blaine liked to watch when he was sick.
"That's a good idea… I think that's pretty much the only thing he likes when he's sick that we might be allowed to bring him," Kurt replied, sighing. "Let's go… I'm sure he's not alone, but I'd rather be there with him."
Being in the hospital sucked. Blaine knew that before he was admitted, but it certainly didn't make dealing with being stuck in a narrow bed with an IV line in his arm any easier. He sort of felt bad that he was screwing up Carole's work schedule once again; she had spent so much time off taking care of him right after his mother's death, and now she was taking more time off to be with him while he was in the hospital.
"You really don't have to take off work… I'll be okay by myself…" Blaine began.
"Don't you dare start worrying about me taking off work… your health is much more important. And Burt and I don't want you to be alone right now… not until we know what's going on and we know that you're going to be okay," Carole replied, cutting him off.
"Carole…"
"We're not going to argue about this, sweetie. You get some rest… I have a feeling Kurt is going to be here soon to check on you. And I know that you will want to be awake while he's here."
"I'm not really tired," Blaine replied. "I'm just still really thirsty…"
"I'll talk to the nurse and see if you can have anything to drink." Blaine closed his eyes as Carole squeezed his hand, standing up and walking out of the little room to talk to the nurse for Blaine. He didn't want to be there; Blaine wanted nothing more than to be back in the dorm room he shared with Kurt, working on the ridiculous amount of schoolwork that he still needed to tackle. But there was no way anyone would let him leave now, not when they knew that he was sick.
"Blaine?" The boy opened his eyes as he heard a familiar voice calling his name, smiling slightly as he saw his boyfriend and one of his best friends standing in the doorway. "How are you feeling?"
"Definitely not sick enough to be in the hospital," Blaine replied as Kurt and Wes approached the bed. "What's in the bag?" Wes smiled as he put it down.
"Just a few things we knew you would want. Computer, a couple of movies. And some school work, because we know you were already freaking out about getting everything done," Wes replied.
"But not too much, because you're probably supposed to be resting. Even if you don't feel that sick," Kurt added.
"Thanks, guys. Do you have to get back to school, or do you want to put on one of the movies?" Blaine scooted over to make room on the bed for Kurt, in case the other two decided to stay.
"We have some time… I was planning on sticking around for a little while anyway," Wes replied as Kurt pulled the laptop out of the bag, setting it up on the tray table and pulling out the stack of movies they had brought before he sat down on the bed next to Blaine.
"Your pick… and you should know we wouldn't just drop this stuff off and then leave you alone," Kurt replied, leaning in to press a kiss against Blaine's cheek. Blaine smiled slightly and snuggled closer to his boyfriend, closing his eyes and pulling a movie out of the pile without really looking. "Pirates?"
"I don't really care," Blaine replied, handing it over as Wes settled down in the only chair in the room. "Wait… where did Carole go?"
"She went downstairs to call my dad and get some dinner. Oh… and she asked me to tell you that they said you can't have anything just yet," Kurt said. Blaine pouted slightly. "Hey… it's just for a little while longer. They just want to keep everything controlled so that you don't end up getting sicker."
"But I'm so thirsty…" Blaine muttered.
"You'll survive. You just need something to take your mind off of it until things work themselves out," Kurt replied.
Blaine curled up next to his boyfriend as the movie started on his laptop, trying to focus on the adventures of Jack Sparrow rather than how much he really wanted a glass of water.
He didn't remember falling asleep, but Blaine certainly remembered being woken up as Kurt got out of the bed. "Please don't go…"
"I have to… we both have homework that we need to get done before class tomorrow. But I'm going to come back as soon as school gets out." Blaine closed his eyes as Kurt leaned in and pressed a kiss against his forehead. "I love you."
"I love you, too." Blaine gently squeezed Kurt's hand.
"See you later, man. Feel better, okay?" Blaine smiled at Wes as the two left the room. Blaine closed his eyes again for a moment, before he started to dig through the backpack the other two ad left, trying to find some more of his homework to deal with. He'd already finished the book he'd taken to the doctor's office with him.
Blaine had already started working on what was left of his chemistry make-up work before Carole came back into the room. "How are you feeling?" Blaine couldn't help himself as he rolled his eyes. He was getting really sick of that particular question.
"I don't feel sick… not really. And I really don't want to be here," Blaine replied.
"It's just until they get your blood sugar under control. Once they have everything stabilized again, they'll let you come home…"
"You mean go back to school."
"No… you're going to come back to Lima for a couple of days, just until you have everything under control. Then you can go back to school."
"I know what to do, Carole… my mom was diabetic. I watched her deal with all of this my entire life…" Blaine began.
"Sweetie, it's different when you have to deal with something like this for yourself. You may understand what needs to be done, but that doesn't mean that you're going to remember everything right away. It's just going to be a few days."
"A few days… that's like an eternity at Dalton…" Blaine began.
"You'll still have time to get caught up. We can make sure of that." Blaine sighed, choosing to go back to his homework rather than try to argue with Carole about any of this. Blaine was quickly learning that it was no good arguing with Carole and Burt about anything. When they made up their minds that something needed to be done, it was going to happen their way. "Just don't work too hard, sweetie. You still need to be getting plenty of rest, even if you don't feel like you're sick."
"It's not like I can really go anywhere… how am I going to overdo it when I'm still stuck in bed?" Blaine commented.
Blaine really didn't want to be stuck in Lima, but he hadn't exactly been given a choice when it came time for him to get out of the hospital. Now it was Friday, and Blaine was trying to figure out exactly how he was going to approach the subject of driving to the group sessions he went to every week. Blaine sighed as he walked downstairs fully dressed, wondering exactly what he was going to say.
"Hey, Carole? Can I talk to you?" Blaine asked, walking into the kitchen. He wasn't that surprised when she put down the dish towel, turning around to face him.
"What's going on? Is everything okay?" Blaine nodded, sighing at the question. It seemed like that was the only thing anyone ever wanted to ask him anymore.
"Yeah… which is why I'm wondering if I could go out for a little while," Blaine replied. "Just to group… I sort of feel like I need to go this week, after everything that's happened." Blaine bit down on his bottom lip as Carole seemed to think about what he had just asked.
"It's just for a few hours, right?" Blaine nodded in response. "Okay. But I think you should take something to eat, just in case you start feeling sick. And you need to make sure you check your blood sugar regularly."
"I know, Carole… I'll do it." He watched as Carole smiled at him, walking over and giving him a hug.
"I know you're responsible and that you'll do what you're supposed to… I just can't help but worry. I'm a mom – it's sort of in the job description." Blaine nodded, knowing that Carole was right. It wasn't like she was acting this way to annoy him; she just wanted to make sure that he was okay.
"I know. I just get frustrated… I'm still trying to get used to the idea of being so completely out of control of everything right now…" Blaine commented. Carole nodded.
"I know, sweetie. But it's just a little longer… you just need some time to adjust to all of the new things going on in your life. Change is tough. Especially when you have to deal with so much of it in such a short period of time. Go get ready, and I'll figure out something for you to take with you to eat."
Blaine nodded, turning around and starting up the stairs as Carole turned around and went back into the kitchen. He picked up his phone, shooting a quick text message to Nick. I'm coming this afternoon… let them know I might be late. Blaine sat down on his bed, sliding his feet into a pair of shoes before he walked into the bathroom to start getting ready. He picked up the little black pouch that held his blood sugar monitor, pulling everything out and pricking his arm so that he could get a reading. He sighed as he realized the number was a little lower than it should have been, meaning that he had probably accidentally given himself too much insulin earlier. He was still trying to figure everything out, and it wasn't exactly easy.
Blaine grabbed his cell phone off the nightstand and tucked it into his messenger bag, adding in the little black case once he had re-packed it. He thought that he would be cutting it close to get to the meeting on time, but he wasn't going to go without having something to do. Considering how much homework he still had to do, he couldn't afford to forget it.
"Keys and a snack… do you need anything else before you go?" Carole asked, standing in the doorway of Blaine's room.
"I was going to grab something to eat before I left… I just checked, and it was 63."
"How about some fruit? I bought some oranges. Or blueberries… I know they're your favorite." Blaine nodded, smiling slightly.
"Yeah, that sounds good. I'll grab something on the way out the door," Blaine replied. He hugged Carole quickly, smiling slightly. "Thanks, Carole. For everything. It really means a lot that you and Burt have done so much for me… you didn't have to do any of it."
"We wouldn't have let you just get tossed around… that was the last thing you needed to have happen at that point. And you're a member of the family now." Blaine closed his eyes for a moment as Carole pressed a kiss on his forehead. "You should get going… I don't want you to be too late for your group meeting.
"Thanks, Carole."
Blaine slid through the doorway, doing his best to be as quiet as possible so that he wouldn't disrupt the group meeting that had already started. He had really tried to be on time, but traffic and the necessity of stopping to check his blood sugar again had pushed him a few minutes further behind schedule than he had intended to let himself get.
"Blaine… we were starting to wonder if you were coming." Blaine smiled slightly as he sank down into the empty seat nearest the door.
"Sorry… traffic was kind of a mess…"
"I heard that you might have had kind of a rough week… Nick mentioned that you had been in the hospital. Do you want to talk about it?" Blaine sighed at the group leader's question, glancing over at Nick. The other boy looked slightly guilty, but Blaine didn't even really care. They were going to figure it out eventually.
"I'm doing better. I, uh… I was diagnosed with diabetes. Type I… like my mom. I don't feel sick. But I keep thinking about how bad she got right before she died. How sick she was. And I can't help but start to worry that the same thing is going to happen to me, that I'm going to end up…" Blaine couldn't finish his sentence. He couldn't make himself admit that he was afraid of dying.
"You're afraid that you'll die because you have the same illness…" Blaine looked up at the words, nodding as he saw a new member sitting in the corner of the couch he had taken up residence in a couple of months earlier. His name tag said that his name was Eric.
"Yeah. Exactly." Blaine watched as Eric nodded.
"I know how that feels…"
"Eric, would you like to share?" Blaine bit down on his bottom lip as he waited to see what the other boy would do.
"I know you may think that it's the end of the world… but seriously, you can't let yourself give up just because you know that you might die. You don't have it that bad… trust me on that one. You have answers. Solutions. You go to the doctor, and they know exactly what's going to fix you. I go to the doctor and they have guesses, and a new combination of drugs every few months. You take care of yourself, and you'll live to a normal age. No matter how hard I try, it's going to be an accomplishment if I live to see twenty-five. It'll take a miracle for me to see thirty." Blaine watched for a moment as the boy took a deep breath. "I'm not saying any of this because I want your pity… I'm saying it because you shouldn't wallow in self-pity. You just have to live. While you still have the chance."
"I think that's the best advice anyone has given me since all of this started," Blaine replied.
The group session was pretty normal after that, with everyone who wanted to talk getting a turn. Blaine mostly kept quiet, listening to everyone else and occasionally sneaking glances at Eric. He wondered what was wrong with the other boy that caused him to be so ill. But he had a feeling that it wasn't appropriate to ask, and Blaine didn't want to impose. Instead of approaching the guy after the session ended, Blaine chose to walk over to Nick and talk to his friend for a few moments.
"You aren't mad at me, are you? I was worried… you said you were coming, and then when you were late I sort of wondered out loud if you had ended up back in the hospital. Which made everyone else worry…" Nick began.
"It's okay. I was sort of wondering how I was going to bring it all up… I wanted to talk about it."
"You are okay, right? I don't need to be worried, or anything?"
"I'm still kind of in the learning curve, trying to figure out how to do all of the stuff I used to see my mom doing for myself. But I'll be okay once I get used to all of this." Blaine was a little surprised when Nick moved in to give him a hug, but he accepted it. Strange things happened in group all the time; given all the emotions that got brought up in a given session, it wasn't all that unusual for people to need some kind of comfort afterwards. "Hey… is everything okay?"
"I'm just glad you're okay, man. We were all really worried. I was really worried. Before I knew what was going on, I was afraid…" Nick began. Blaine raised an eyebrow, until he realized what Nick had been afraid of.
"You were afraid that I had done something stupid…"
"Yeah." Blaine nodded. "I'm sorry… I shouldn't jump to conclusions like that. I'm the one who did that, not you. And you've done everything right – you asked for help when you needed it. You've worked to get through all of this without doing stupid shit like trying to kill yourself."
"Nick… chill out. Just call me before you start to freak out again, okay? I'll tell you the truth, if you really want to know." Blaine watched as Nick smiled.
"I didn't think all of this through very well, did I?" Blaine shook his head, smiling back at his friend.
"No. You really didn't. But you haven't exactly had a lot of experience with trying to help someone else through all of this… this is new territory for everyone."
"So… will you be back at school on Monday?" Nick asked. Blaine shrugged.
"If I get this dosage thing figured out, yeah. I'm still kind of having trouble… I'm doing something wrong when I figure out how much insulin I need to take, so I keep ending up with my blood sugar a little too low. Which means I have to eat at weird times and stuff…"
"You'll get it. It just takes some practice, I'm sure."
"Just as long as I don't end up making myself sick again, I'm good. I don't want to end up back in the hospital any time soon," Blaine replied. He watched as Nick nodded.
"I'll talk to you later, man… I think there might be someone else who wants to talk to you before you go home." Blaine turned around as Nick gestured behind him, smiling at Eric.
"I'll see you at school next week." Blaine stuck his good hand in his pocket, walking over to the new guy in the group. "Hey, man. Thanks for earlier… I really think I needed to hear that."
"No problem… it's all about your attitude, really. The way I see it, you can't let yourself get upset over the stuff you can't control. Being sick is one of those things…" Blaine smiled slightly, nodding at Eric's comment.
"Yeah. I get that. It's just hard to deal with at first, you know?"
"No… I wish I did know. But I was born sick. My mom didn't know that she had HIV until after she had me, and by then it was too late. I was already infected. I guess that makes it easier to accept the fact that I'm going to die young – I never knew what it was like to really have much of a future to begin with."
"I'm guessing your mom died?" Blaine asked. He watched as Eric nodded.
"My dad, too. He was infected first… didn't realize that having unprotected sex with other guys would potentially cause a problem." Blaine watched as Eric scoffed at the thought. "Yeah… my dad was a closeted fag…" Blaine backed away, crossing his arms as he did so.
"Don't use that word. I really hate that one…" Blaine began.
"Oh. You're gay…"
"Yeah, I am. And I have a boyfriend. So I really don't appreciate it when people say things like that, like there's something inherently wrong with being gay."
"I'm sorry, man. I didn't mean that as a shot at you. I don't really care, okay? I just have a hard time forgiving my dad for what he did… it's one thing to be in a committed relationship, but he cheated on my mom. With a guy. He couldn't ever admit that he was gay." Blaine sighed.
"Just don't use that word, please… I've dealt with a lot of shit in the past, and it always seemed like that word was somehow involved in all of it…"
"I really am sorry, Blaine. I should know better than to say shit like that around people I don't know. You never know what people feel or believe before you get to know them." Blaine nodded.
"It's okay. Just… try not to use that one. About anyone."