Day 2: Jiru's Log:
I am starting a log book to help pass the long, sailing days on the endless ocean. At least, until we reach the next island; which Luffy says will be Fishman Island. I hope it's nothing like Thriller Bark. I hate Thriller Bark and hope it burns to ashes.
It has been forty-eight hours after our Thriller Bark departure. Luffy will NOT eat the cheese platter I made for him and I ask why; he explains that cheese is the worst food to eat before battle. I have no clue what he is talking about; so I go to ask his best friend, Usoppu.
Big mistake asking the chronically lying sniper; I can't make heads nor tails of the long-winded story about building-sized zombie bears and size-changing Perona ghosts. (I never met the woman called Perona on my stay on Thriller Bark.) I try several times to direct the bragging 'Captain' Usoppu on why Luffy won't eat cheese, but fail in each attempt.
I go then to ask Nami; and she informed me she would provide an answer, as long as I could pay for it. I told her I wasn't going to pay, because the only Beri-valued thing I had at the moment was the with the large, double-fisted size diamond that Luffy had allowed me to choose from the Thriller Bark treasure. Nami had taken all the treasure AND credit for that round. Damn her, if she keeps her wily skills up, this treasure hunter will soon be out of a worth-while job. Oh well.
I ask Robin why Luffy won't eat cheese, but the reserved older woman just smiled conspiratorially at me and suggests asking Sanji. That Robin, I swear she practices in front of a mirror the straight faces she uses in teasing me. I don't know what to do with that clever, level-headed woman.
I move into the kitchen to ask Sanji why Luffy won't eat cheese; but end up with a mouth full of raspberry cheesecake the cook had been fixing for his trio of lovely women. I am the most susceptible – next to Luffy of course – in being distracted by food. Sweets, fruits and breads are my biggest weakness on the ship. Sanji, of course, is to blame for this development; as the blonde-headed cook creates nothing but the food of heaven. I leave the meats and vegetables to Luffy. (I'd kick Luffy's butt if he ever ate my seafood, though.)
I am focused on enjoying the sweet delight when Zoro swaggers in and opens his mouth to tease me; since karma always comes full circle. (I had mercilessly teased him back on Thriller Bark.) The swordsman suggests I take the cheesecake, smear it over my body and go lie on Sanji's bunk.
The cook is utterly and verbally stunned; the brain behind the sharp eyes being torn by sexually-explicit fantasies – his arousal clearly evident by the nosebleed – and the primal instinct to tear the swordsman's view on women into pieces and reshape it into something better. I laugh at both of them and suggest a threesome. This allows me to win the argument and spare both of them from having to resort to physically violence – Zoro IS still healing from the Luffy-expelled wounds that Kuma gave to him.
I yell out the door for Chopper; since both Zoro and Sanji are losing blood via nose. Brooke saunters in then, inquiring why Zoro had stormed out of the kitchen in a confused rage.
I shrug my shoulder in fake ignorance; not yet fully comfortable with being myself around the newest member of Luffy's crew: Dead Bones Brooke. The skeleton; by Franky and mine's calculations, is ninety-one years old. I have no idea what to think of that; since Brooke acts like he's eighteen. Then again; Franky acts the same, so they are both crazy and perverts.
With every crazy thing that happened from there to day's end: Luffy bothering Sanji for food – which the cook refuses him until dinner – I completely forget my original mission in finding out why Luffy would not eat cheese.
Oh well.
Day 3:
My wake-up call on day three after leaving Thriller Bark is something I never want to experience again. Never. The sniper had pranked me awfully good; at Luffy's insistence. The Lying Sniper had somehow managed to not only put fake bugs on my bunk; but in my toothpaste as well.
For those who do not know me; I hate – MORTALLY HATE – certain bugs, spiders and snakes.
The Sniper had somehow created fake spiders and roaches that moved on their own. Yea, he kept yelling at me: 'THEY WEREN'T REAL' every time I nearly had him. But the feather-light touch of a spider on my skin is something I can't stand. I also feel like screaming my lungs out even at the mention of a cockroach. They are icky and deserve to die.
I have to honestly say I spent half the day hunting for Usoppu to put his head on a platter. You wouldn't believe how many hiding places one can find on the Sunny-gou. The other half of the day, I spent plotting my revenge on Luffy and Usoppu.
Day 4:
Chopper asks me if I am feeling any better with my healing left ankle. I told the brown-furred reindeer it really, really itched. He told me it should since the bandages had itching powder all over them. I told Chopper to go help Franky in carving out two coffins; since I was going to kill Luffy and Usoppu yet again. They pranked me a second time. Just how they managed to infect my bandages with itching powder is beyond me.
I spent the WHOLE day harassing the mischievous pair mercilessly. I threw air-balls at them, wanting to leave them with bruises all over their bodies for putting itching powder on my bandages. I had to zip around sitting on my air-pad, using my Reiki-Reiki power, to chase them down to hurl the air-balls. I missed more than I hit; but nothing seemed to make them fear my wrath. They loved it; I guess they were really, really bored since this is the second day they pranked me. It usually rotates. Lucky me.
I quit my Luffy & Usoppu harassment at dinner and utterly ignored them until I retired for sleep; remembering to not only check for creepy-crawly bugs in the bed; but making sure that there was no itching powder within my clothes.
I hope tomorrow they'll forget about trying to goad me into chasing them and go prank Zoro or Sanji or somebody else.
Day 5:
The morning turned out to be normal; as there were no bugs and no itching powder. I had taken my time to get myself started for the day; calling in Chopper to assist me in changing the bandage on my foot; as per his instructions. The discoloring on the skin has faded away 90% and the swelling has gone down by half. It no longer hurts every time I move. (Which made chasing Luffy and Usoppu not as fun as it should have been. YOU try chasing two idiot teenaged males around on a large ocean-going ship; while zipping around on an air-pad that is controlled by your mental focus and will power without jostling a broken ankle.)
By the time I exit my room and joined the galley for breakfast; Luffy and Usoppu had already consumed theirs and were gathering their fishing gear to complete their plans of fishing all morning. I asked Franky and Robin to warn me if they moved from their railing-sitting spots on the starboard side or if they did anything remotely suspicious. They said ok.
Minutes ticked by as the other pirates slowly drifted out to do their own daily schedules: Robin to do her reading on the sunny deck, Nami to check the course, the weather, then retire to her cartography room to draw more maps. Chopper left to go play around in his medical room as Brooke followed the reindeer; wanting to offer his help. Franky, being the last to finish his food; told me he would keep an eye on the fishing pair. The crew had slowly been catching on to the pair's pranks over the past couple days; so Franky offered his help in giving me a reprieve. This leaves me, Sanji and Zoro left in the galley.
It has been three days since I last teased Zoro and Sanji; so I think up something quick. Offering my assistance to one or the other; Sanji immediately jumped on the chance for my help, only to turn around and state that my lovely hands shouldn't be tarnished by the dirty dishwater and forbids me to help him.
The cook's statement sent Zoro into a snort-laughing fit and the swordsman informed the cook on how he should permanently assign me to become the scullery-maid. The comment provoked both males into another macho-fight – something that was prime fodder for merciless teasing. I off-handedly mentioned that, if I were to be a scullery-maid, I would have to wear ONLY my panties and apron while washing the dishes…with soapy water.
I never get tired of their reactions; Zoro's face went red as Sanji's nose bled again; dribbling all over his cigarette. I left then, telling them to behave or else before closing the galley door and leaving them alone with their imaginations.
The rest of my day leaves me with the leery feeling of being watched. Every time I look over my shoulder to the fishermen (Luffy and Usoppu, now with Chopper joining them) I just manage to see them stop staring at me and pointedly – with giggles and undisguised re-glances – to focus on their fishing. They have managed to catch fifty pounds of Royal Carnaan Trout (bluish-tinted fish the size of an unsharpened pencil) for the day's final meal. How they managed to catch ANY thing was beyond me; since it was clearly obvious the two had other things on their mind.
But thankfully; no more pranks for the day; the two ship's idiots were just themselves: capering about acting like fools. They managed to drag Brooke and Chopper in their random; aimless dances about the grass lower deck of the Sunny-gou. This of course, was done to entertain Robin, Nami and myself as we three ladies lounged in the afternoon sun.
At dinner, Luffy announced that Zoro would have the night watch again; since my watch was canceled; as per captain's instructions. I argued lightly against this; not wanting to be useless. But the captain remained firm in his belief that I wasn't to over-exert myself with my bandaged foot. The vote was eight against two; and the swordsman ended up taking night-watch anyway; since he had slept all day to begin with.
I went to bed; checking for fake bugs and any other childish pranks the two Fools would have planted beyond my knowledge. Nothing was forthcoming so I went to sleep.
Day 7: Luffy's entry
Today, I have found this book. ~straw hat doodle~ Yes, I now how too writ. Robin taght me. My nakama ~doodle face~ treasure hunter Jiru mistakeningly left this be-hind. Haha be-hind…butt. I said Butt. HAHAHA! ~smelly pooping-butt doodle~
This book has been left on the table by her; and I peek inside too see what it says and do not understand most of it. She writs too much in her spair time. I will sooooooo get in trouble if she sees this and nows I have it. ~doodle face with lazers coming out the eyes~
So I writ in this book too get her mad at me and chase me. I love it when she chases me. It is fun. Only not as fun as it shold bee for her. Bumble bees do not make good food. I now becuz I tried eating one once and it hurt. ~bumble bee doodle~
She will sooooo chase me when she sees this. Butt she will not catch me becuz she hurt her foot in the fight against the Bear-guy. I did not see it becuz I was sleeping; if I was not sleeping, I wood have protected her. I will become stronger next time becuz I hate it when my nakama get hurt. She has forgiven me thou, and makes me not think about it. It's ok, because I plan too get stronger anyway. She is my precious nakama; and has lost something precious too her at Thriller Bark. She is happy thou, not thinking about her dead child. She made me stop blaming myself for that and said she wood hit me if I got sad thinking about how she got hurt.
I wonder if Sanji has made lunch yet. I sit here on the Sunny-gou's head, trying to bee sneaky and rite in her book. Shold I rite that I like Jiru really really a lot? Sanji always talks about loving a woman butt I do not now what he is talking about. I like too teese Jiru ~treasure doodle~ more then Nami ~fanged-face doodle~, becuz Nami always hits me when I make her mad. Jiru just yells and tries not too laugh. She laughs so fast, it makes me smile. If she is happy, I am happy even more.
Tomorrow Usoppu ~long-nose face doodle~ and I ~strawhat doodle~ plan too prank her really really good by stealing her underweer and weering it on are heads ~panties doodle~. I shold hide this book so she will not now about are plans. I plan too bee Super Luffy and run around weering her underweer on my head. ~pantie face doodle~ This will make her laugh so fast and chase me. ~action chase scene doodle~
I also have something else to give too her soon. I got her the unykorn horn that was on the unykorn zombee back on Thriller Bark. She was so happy too see the unykorn even thou it was a zombee. She even asked the unykorn zombee to bee in are crew! She is so silly. Only the captan can ask for new nakama. Butt that is ok, since the unykorn did not join after all.
I shold go now and see if Sanji has any food. Writing makes me really really hungry.