AN: I am sooooo sorry it took me so long to update! I got super busy with school and work! I hope that now I will be able to continue to post a chapter a week, I have a lot of the story actually written out; I just have to type and post! If anyone is interested in being my beta it would be much appreciated!

Anyways Enjoy! And please review to let me know what you think!

Fenris froze when he saw a flash of black and red.

"Ama?"

He had been in Kirkwall for two weeks now, and Ama had unknowingly eluded his grasp. Of course, the fact that he had been sulking and raging in Danarius' mansion for most of his stay could not have helped matters. The truth was Fenris was scared of what he would find; especially if what he found was his Ama in the arms of a mage cur.

"Venhedis!"

How could she forget about me? Did our love mean nothing to her? I would have done anything to project her!

Fenris did not want to believe a single thing Danarius had said to be true, but so far, it appeared that his bastard of a master had been truthful. As Fenris continued stalking down the dark alleys of Lowtown he heard a giggle, his eyes closed at such a comforting and achingly familiar sound.

"Oh Anders! I am quite drunk; I believe it is time for me to stumble my way back to Hightown and that ridiculous mansion."

"Oh no, Hawke… you must be joking my dear. You will be completely helpless!"

At that, Fenris saw a familiar flash of red bathing the walls outside of the Hanged Man.

"You know I can handle myself."

"Yes dear, but are not completely in the correct state of mind right now."

"Anders. I am going home, and I most certainly do not need your help. Go to the clinic, I am sure you patients need you, you have not been there in days."

With that, she stormed off in the direction of the Amell Manor.

It was then that Fenris got his first look at Ama in four years. She still astounded him with her beauty. His eyes swept over her luscious curves, which peaked strategically from the slashes and gaps in her robes. The red, twisting veins of lyrium contrasted sharply against her smooth porcelain skin. Her midnight hair shone down her back, ruffling in the breeze.

Oh Maker, surely I am lost. How could I harm this angel? Please, let her turn, let me see her face.

As Fenris continued to follow close behind her, his emotions got even more muddled. His anger at her leaving and betrayal was mixing dangerously with the mounting lust for his love. Fenris knew that soon he would lose control.

As Ama passed the Chantry, she felt her head begin to clear; she was never one to stay drunk long.

It has to have something to do with the lyrium. Fenris never stayed drunk long either.

At that thought pain lanced through Ama, she missed him so much. It was as if she had lost a part of her soul. She had not felt complete since her had left Minrathous, not even when she was able to reunite with her family.

Fenris had filled her heart when it had been ripped to pieces and crushed. Now that he was no longer with her, she ached every single day as if a scorching fire engulfed her heart.

Is that what Danarius meant? Is this what happens when we are apart for this long?

Before Ama could even finish her thoughts, she felt the hairs on her arm stand on ends. Instantly she froze, perking her ears to any sound. She felt a strong arm wrap around her, immediately her hands crackled with electric energy.

"Oh there will be none of that."

Ama almost collapsed from the sound of his voice. With a burst of blue light Ama felt her magic slowly drain from her body, while simultaneously Fenris flipped her around to face him.

Breathlessly Ama uttered, "Fen-n?"

Her cobalt blue eyes search his fiery emerald. He thrust her against the alley wall, and shouted in angst, "WHY?"

When she did not answer his fingers gripped her delicate shoulders tighter.

"Why did you leave me, and take up with that man," Fenris bellowed even louder.

"He-e w-was going to kill me, Fen," Ama whispered brokenly as her body began to tremble. His grip loosened at her use of his pet name.

"Y-You saw what he did to me the last time, I am not strong enough and he knew it. He was going to kill me before I became too powerful."

"But I am your balance! I would never let you lose control!"

"I couldn't do it anymore! I have never been as strong as you! I could not let him take me anymore! My body belongs to you alone! I hated myself, I still do! I don't deserve you, I never did!"

With that outburst Ama's body shook with sobs, as tears streamed down her face. Fenris was torn, "Did you fuck that blonde mage?"

"Do you think so little of me?"

"I overheard the two of you speaking earlier, you seem… close."

"He has been like a brother to me for the past four years, he knows my heart is, was already taken."

"I still don't understand, how could you leave me? You had to know what he would do to me! Do you know how long he tortured me? I was never given reprieve, never allowed to crawl back to your waiting arms, if you had even been there!"

"Fenris, I have cried myself to sleep every night because of the emptiness I felt at leaving you! But would you have preferred I be raped and murdered?"

Fenris flinched, "I would have kept you safe until we could have escaped together."

Ama's shoulders slumped in defeat, in barely a whisper, "Forgive me, my love."

Fenris mind was reeling, was this really happening? Did his one strength and salvation still love him? He stood closer, bringing his body flush with hers savoring the feeling. Fenris felt his arm hair prickle, and it was not from the anticipation. Sharply he disengaged from Ama and drew his greatsword, blue lines igniting.

"Fenris, what's the matter?"

Ama stood battle ready staff in hand, a ball of flames licked around her open palm. Her red light mixed with Fenris' blue, casting a mysterious violet tint to the alley. Fenris looked at Ama and saw his fierce warrior, her devastating beauty.

"Danarius is in the Free Marches, I can sense him, can't you?"

"It has been so long, my senses have dulled in that area."

"We must prepare for his arrival, I will not let him take you," Fenris said passionately, as he cupped Ama tear stained face.

"You are welcome to stay with me Fen," Ama said with a slight blush, trying to ignore the fact that she had not been with a man in nearly five years.

"That would be sufficient, but what of your companions? Do they know of me? Where will your pet Anders sleep?"

Ama bristled at his last implication," Firstly Anders has never slept in my bed; he only comes to give me a sleeping draft and retires to his own chambers. Also, my companions have some knowledge of you, but not much I have not shared a lot of my time with Danarius. They know you as my safety and my love that is all. I did not want to be someone that is pitied, only Anders know I was tortured, no details. Even that was an accident in the fade."

"I see. I apologize for my previous comment. Please, lead on."