My apologies for the delay of this chapter. Real Life really got in the way. Thanks for your patience. I hope you enjoy Chapter 11. There is still more to come!

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."
~ Rumi

11. Re-quite

Faith hung her coat on the hook behind the main desk at the ICU nursing station. She felt like she had just left. Good thing she didn't pull these shifts very often. They were too tiring. One thing that would make this shift more interesting was that she'd seen Mr. Goren in the hallway as she arrived. He had nodded acknowledgement to her as she came in; she was surprised he remembered her. He was looking far better than this morning. Alex would be very relieved and Faith was delighted she would get to see more of Alex and her partner's interaction. She smiled to herself as she started to go over the patient list. It was a quiet day, but that could change at any moment. She hadn't noticed if Mr. Goren still had the cross wrapped around his fingers....

As Alex rounded the corner into the hallway she saw Faith at the nurse's station and smiled tiredly at her. Then she caught sight of Goren and her stomach did a flip-flop of relief. He was out in the hallway, hands clasped behind his back, reading something on the wall. She would have recognized that stance no matter what Goren was wearing. She was sure he'd be happy to see his new clothes, because right now he was sporting a flimsy, faded cotton hospital gown with tiny flowers topped with a pale blue terry robe. But nothing could camouflage the broad shoulders and the distinctive curve of his back as he hunched forward to inspect the plaque. Alex would have known him anywhere, wearing anything, at any distance. From the knees down his legs were bare, except for fresh white gauze around the ankles. The long calves ended in surprisingly delicate ankles and white slip-on hospital slippers. For a guy so tall and with such broad shoulders, he had very fine bone structure. Except for the attire, Robert Goren looked almost normal from a distance. But she wasn't likely going to get used to that 5 day growth of beard on his face. As she got closer, he heard and recognized her footsteps. She could seldom sneak up on him. He had a sixth sense of her whereabouts. Now he turned his head, raising his eyebrows in undisguised pleasure and satisfaction at seeing her. He'd had a shower.

"What? You developed an allergy to a razor?" she beamed her pleasure at seeing him up and out of his hospital bed. In reply to her comment, he extended his hand and exaggerated the obvious tremors he was experiencing. "Ahh." She understood and immediately became more serious. He tilted his head, chin forward in a look of curiosity. Did she really care that he hadn't shaved?

"They cut you loose!", said Alex avoiding his curious gaze He nodded and spread his arms wide indicating his lack of tethers to medical paraphernalia.

"Still no voice, huh?" He shook his head. Of course wasn't this the way she liked her men? She'd said they talk too much.....His mind roamed back to her comment at the end of the Keith Ramsey case. He and Carver had shared a look of incomprehension at her remark, but then she was completely fed up with men after dealing with the harassment and manipulating baggage handlers of Trans Union Air. But she had loved playing the Queen of Sheba and arresting Ramsey. Some of their best work was those times they made the perps squirm. Alex was amazing. She always seemed to know where he was leading next. She had a gift for it.

"Allowed to leave yet?" He shook his head again, then unexpectedly reached out with his finger and lifted a single tear from the corner of Alex's eye. He raised both eyebrows to ask the silent question, his expression a mixture of curiosity and concern. If he didn't know better, he'd say she'd been crying, her eyes still swollen and shining.

"It's cold out", she deflected. She did not meet his gaze.

Faith was still behind the desk at the nursing station, watching the reunion of the two partners and particularly Mr. Goren's body language and expressions. Oh, this is good! Well worth the short turn-around in shifts. As she had suspected, this was not unrequited love. It may be unspoken, but she had no doubt it was there.

"Here you go. These are for you. I hope they're all right." Alex handed Goren his bag of clothing and they made their way back into his room. He went around to one side and set the bag down on the bed. Alex went to the opposite side with her bag.

Goren opened his bag to look inside and glancing up at her, tried his best to show his gratitude using only his eyes. Then he peered more closely into the bag and reached inside to move things around. His eyebrows knit together. He placed his hands wide apart on the bed and dropped his head down. His shoulders began to shake. As she watched him, Alex's own eyebrows knit together and her concern began to rise. Suddenly Goren doubled over, placed his elbows on the bed, and laced his fingers in his prison cut curls. His shoulders continued shaking and he began to make hoarse coughing sounds.

Alex was already moving around the bed to his side, adrenalin pumping and panic rising. She didn't understand; what was the matter? He was looking so much better just a few seconds ago. She placed one hand on his back and quickly reached past him for the nurses' call button. Before she touched it, his hand snapped out and grabbed her wrist. He drew himself up to his full height, turning his head sideways to look down at her. His reddened eyes were crinkled and wet at the corners, and the hand that was not gripping her wrist was clapped over his mouth. He released her hand, lifted his fingers in the air signalling her to wait a moment and reached down into the bag to coax out the policeman boxers that had initially caused her so much amusement in the store. He lifted them gingerly in the air between index fingers and thumbs of both hands, each pinkie raised in dainty salute. His eyes widened and gleamed and the muscles in his jaw flexed as he stared at the policeman's boxers. Goren rolled his eyes to his partner with a You've got to be kidding me expression plain on his face.

"Jesus Christ, Goren!" she swore at him, "You scared the crap out of me!" He looked down at her with affection and cocked his head sympathetically to the side, the merriment in his brown eyes giving way to guilty contrition. Then a single raised and questioning eyebrow.

"Well, I liked them", she said defensively.

Alex removed her hand from his back, sorely tempted to swat him and retreated back to her bag on the other side of the bed. He was about to return his new boxers back in his bag and then frowned again. With one long elegant finger, he withdrew the ladies briefs Alex had bought for herself and stretched his arm across the bed to her. Alex rolled her eyes and felt her face heating up.

"Thanks. Guess they packed them in the wrong bag." She snatched the briefs from his finger and quickly stuffed them in her bag.

Goren calmly nodded his agreement, but could not disguise a twinkle in his bloodshot eyes. That man can say way too much with his eyes.

"You're obviously feeling much better." She said with mock acidity. "Any word about when they'll release you?"

He shook his head.

"Well, then I'm going to see if I can take a shower here. If not I'll find a gym or recreation center. I'll let you know if I leave the building."

But before Alex could leave, Goren motioned her to stop. He picked up a pencil and paper from beside his bed and jotted a note which he then passed to Alex. His demeanour was now dead serious.

Was it Donny?

"What do you mean?" Alex asked with caution in her voice. Of course he would pick up on that right away, but she wasn't trying to keep anything from him. She just wanted to avoid giving away information that he would churn over in his mind without the ability to discuss it.

Escape from Tates.

There was no keeping it from him. "Yes, how did you know?" she asked. She knew better than be surprised. This was Robert Goren, and no matter what he'd been through, it was obvious he was rapidly returning to normal.

He held up a newspaper which he must have "borrowed" from a lounge or a nurse. Alex would normally have rolled her eyes at his constant resourcefulness, but not today.

"I'm so sorry, Bobby." She said with genuine regret showing on her face. "I just found out. Let me see the paper. I only know what Ross told me – which is nothing. I'll find out more when we get back."

The article said very little except there was an escaped prisoner from Tates Corrections and that he was not considered dangerous. He had escaped while being transferred to the hospital on Halloween night.

"I'm sorry", Alex repeated as she shook her head. She tried to read the expression in his eyes as he watched her, but his eyes were hooded and he was doing his best to be inscrutable. He looked tired.

"We can't do anything till we know more", Alex said quietly. She was making a valiant effort not to start a rant about Donny's stupidity and ungratefulness. "Are you okay?"

He just continued to stare at her, his mind obviously far away.

"Listen, why don't you have a nap while I find a shower?" He nodded absently, all the amusement of the previous minutes drained away. "Just take it easy. We'll get all the details soon" she said with an encouraging smile. She hoped he'd take the "we" as it was offered and not try to shut her out. You don't have to deal with this alone.

Alex picked up her bag of clothing and toiletries and walked out of the room.

And the air cooled…

He was getting fed up with being left behind, but at the same time his body continued to feel like he'd been hit by a truck. How mundane to use that analogy, but it just seemed to fit. Every muscle ached. He was ready to lie down again, but decided to dress. As he shut himself in his small hospital bathroom, the amusement started to bubble up again, in spite of his concern over Donny.

He stifled a chuckle as best he could. Poor Alex, having to shop for him. It was very strange to think about. The first thing he'd have to do was decide on this underwear. He wished he could have seen Alex doing her shopping. He was very curious about what had gone on in her head. She had such a wicked sense of humor, but he wasn't sure where she was coming from when she had made her selections. Everything she had chosen fit. She'd done very well, but then he expected nothing else. Interesting about the black t-shirts... He left his hospital clothes in the laundry hamper outside his room and went back to lay on the bed while he waited for her. It was nice to be free, no oximeter on his finger, no IV in his shoulder, no repetitive beep, beep, beep of the heart monitor.... He was asleep in seconds.

The hot shower pelting her body felt wonderful. Alex lathered a mountain of shampoo in her hair, scrubbing her overdue scalp and then rinsing the streams of bubbles down her back. Soothing. She closed her eyes and allowed the water to beat against her shoulders, easing away some of the stress of the last week. The steam rose up around her. All she wanted to do was put on some pajamas and crawl into bed and forget the whole last week. But not yet. Reluctantly, she twisted the tap forcing the water to cool. She had a long drive ahead of her, so this was no time to enjoy a relaxing shower. Darn. Soon enough, she hoped. Goren had a good shower at his place and his oversize couch was nice and long, so she would sleep well - if he did.

Her clean body and fresh clothes felt wonderful. She brushed her hair and left it loose. It would dry on its own. She was trying not to put any thought into their situation until Goren could discuss things.

When she returned to Goren's room, he was fully clothed and sound asleep on the bed. His color was returning to normal she noted with satisfaction, but even in sleep he still looked exhausted. His lips were still a mess, but appeared less swollen and some of the loose skin had fallen off. His eyes didn't look as sunken. She felt as if a great weight was being lifted from her shoulders as she stood quietly and watched him. Whatever came next, they would deal with it. There was that plural again. We will deal with it.

Alex suddenly realized that Faith was standing beside her. Faith returned her smile.

"Our patient is looking much better this afternoon, Alex", Faith whispered. "How about you? Better?"

Alex nodded her head. "So much better, thanks. The shower helped a lot." Alex turned and the two women began walking out of the room and into the hallway so their conversation wouldn't disturb Goren.

"Faith, you wouldn't have seen my cross on the floor or found it in Bobby's bedding, would you?"

"No." Faith replied in a puzzled tone. "I wonder where it went? We should ask Jane, or do you want me to ask Mr. Goren?"

"No", Alex quickly replied. "We don't need to bring it up".

"I'll keep my eyes open for it, especially if we don't find it before you leave."

"Any idea when the doctor might be back?"

"That's up to Mr. Goren. When he can talk, we'll notify Dr. Knowland. We checked him over just before you arrived. He's doing very well considering what he's been through."

Alex nodded her understanding and agreement, relief brightening her face.

"Alex, would you like me to bring you a cot so you can get a bit of rest?"

"No, thanks, I'll be fine in the chair." Alex smiled to herself. There was no way she would be climbing back into bed with Bobby. He'd probably have a heart attack, or jump out of the bed or yell sexual harassment... or worse, waggle his finger at her like he did to Nicole. Yuck. Why did she have to think of that? She certainly never wanted to be classed in the same category as Bobby placed Nicole.

"Please let me get you a cot, you may as well be comfortable while you wait." Faith turned and went on her errand.

As she waited, Alex returned to Goren's bedside. His eyelashes lay against his cheeks; his hands were clasped in his lap, the bandages peaking out the cuffs of his new shirt. The black t-shirt was just visible in the V of his shirt collar. She stood watching his sleeping face and hearing his even breathing, once again in awe and satisfaction that she was one of the privileged few who could be this close to him. Her relief at his recovery left her feeling limp. She reached her hand up to rub her forehead, then rested her forehead in her hand and closed her eyes. She was exhausted.

She opened her eyes. Goren's shopping bag lay on the floor with his leftover toiletries. There would be one pair of underwear inside. Which one was he wearing? Just as she was reaching down to peek Faith returned, rolling the small cot, and parked it beside the hospital bed. Alex snatched her hand back from the bag as though she'd burnt it. The contents remained a mystery.

Faith handed Alex her blanket and whispered, "There you go". Alex sat down on the cot and removed her boots, then lay down on her side facing Goren. The moment she lay down, it was as if every one of her muscles sighed. Her bones seemed to melt into the bed.

She'd hear him if he got up…..

"Eames." It was a rough husky whisper.

Nothing.

It appeared she had fallen asleep on her side, but now her shoulders were rotated and her face pointed upwards. He had no coffee to rouse her. He waited. Then he reached out and slowly rubbed the back of his hand up and down her softly flushed cheek.

Nothing.

Her breathing was steady and determined. He went down on one knee beside her cot and rested his crossed arms on his thigh watching her. She smelled wonderfully fresh – not quite the same as his usual Eames, because of the different soaps, but there was something that was distinctly Eames and he would know her even in the blackest night.

He reached out again, this time with his fingers. He ran them across her forehead, pushing back her hair and tucking the strands behind her ear. He often wanted to do that; to see the expression that would be hiding behind her hair. He always paused momentarily if the wind whipped her hair from her face and unexpectedly revealed her beauty. And she was a beauty, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. Some day he must tell her that. But he knew he'd never have the nerve.

He waited.

Nothing.

He put his whole hand on the side of her head, burying his fingers in her hair, and rubbed her cheek gently with his thumb. He couldn't believe he was being so bold. With eyes still closed, she pushed her face against his hand, trapping it against the pillow, her exhaled breath hitting him on the inside of his wrist. But her eyes didn't open.

Awww, Alex. He was weakened by the sweetness of her unconscious movement and the sensuality of her warm breath caressing his skin. It awakened a tenderness in him that had been repressed for a very long time. Who did she dream was touching her? She would be appalled if she knew what he was feeling right now. The last thing she ever wanted from her colleagues was any sentiment or emotion directed towards her. She always had to be one of the guys. But right now, she looked exhausted. He seldom saw that and it worried him. He'd never had any trouble waking her before. Maybe they should just stay here another night. The hand on the head hadn't worked. What next? He considered kissing the Sleeping Beauty, but was pretty sure that would earn him a black eye he didn't need.

"Alex."

And suddenly he was staring into her hugely dilated hazel eyes less than a foot from his own. When did he get this close? The jolt he felt showed in her eyes, too. She was gorgeous. His first reflex was to jerk his hand out from under her head, in case she didn't want to be touched, but then didn't want to make her think he thought she was a leper. He was kind of trapped here...

"Uh, we can go now," his voice a gravelled whisper.

The shock of waking to his face inches from hers was replaced by confusion.

"You can talk!" Alex exclaimed and immediately felt stupid for stating the obvious. But then it wasn't fair to hold her responsible for something she said waking from a dead sleep.

He replied with a slight stretching of the lips in what could be interpreted as a smile. He leaned away from her and she rose up on her elbow, still sleep-fogged. He hadn't needed to extract his hand.

"What time is it? Have you seen the doctor?" Now that was more like his Eames. They were both control freaks in their own ways.

He nodded and pointed to the clock, answering both questions without a word.

"Okay. I'm ready." Pushing back the blanket, she sat up and swung her legs over the side of the cot, suddenly aware that Goren was down on one knee. She now felt she knew what it was like to be a corpse examined by Goren's acute eye. Pity that the corpses he knelt over were.... well, dead. Under different circumstances, the lady victims probably would have been thrilled to have him bending over them. And probably some of the men, too.

Goren rose along side her as she stood up and looked around, still disoriented from the abrupt waking. She could sure use a cup of coffee right now. Faith entered the room pushing a wheelchair.

"So you'll be leaving us." She said, smiling her gentle smile. "Have you got everything?" Both women looked at each other and then at Goren. Where was that cross? He just nodded, pulled his tube of lip ointment from his pocket to show them and then used it to point at his shopping bag which was back on the bed.

"Alex, I need you at the station. Mr. Goren, it's hospital policy that patients are wheeled to the door, so make yourself comfortable." Faith reached for Alex's blanket, folded it quickly and placed it on the seat of the wheelchair then patted it for Goren to sit down.

Alex followed Faith out to the nurse's station where Faith handed her a sheet of discharge instructions. There wasn't much there. Just that he shouldn't be alone for 48 hours and to make sure he took in plenty of fluids. He should use over the counter painkillers, if needed, and if he felt unwell, he should immediately go to the nearest emergency room. No work for a week and he had to check with his doctor before going back to work. Alex folded the paper and put it in her hip pocket.

"Alex, why don't you find a motel room for the night? I'm worried about you. I don't think you should drive. And Mr. Goren definitely shouldn't. He'll probably be asleep within five minutes."

"I'll be fine, thanks Faith," Alex replied. She preferred to drive rather than spend a night in a motel room with Goren. Too intimate. A motel room, for God's Sake! Adjoining rooms would have put her too far away. She was sure he'd be more comfortable at home, so the sooner they got there, the better. "I'll make sure I get lots of coffee".

"Don't underestimate how hard this has been on you," said Faith.

Once Goren was in the SUV, Faith picked up the blanket and handed it to the shivering Alex.

"Return it when you're able, Alex. You take care of yourself. And him."

"Thank you Faith. Here is my card. Would you please call me if you have any more patients from Tates showing Detective Goren's symptoms? And if you find my necklace, I'd appreciate a call. I'll be happy to pay for the return shipping.

"Thank you for your help and kindness." Alex frowned at herself as tears started welling up in her eyes yet again. She was unused to being shown such kindness by a stranger - or anyone other than family. Something had happened to Alex in this hospital and Faith was a brief but important part of it. This hospital had been a quiet sanctuary for she and Bobby, safe from the outside world and it was almost hard for Alex to leave.

Faith moved closer to give Alex a brief hug, unsettling Alex even more.

"Touch him," Faith urged. "Tell him."

"I've watched too many people wait until it's too late. What have you got to lose?" Faith asked earnestly.

"My life", replied Alex, then walked around the to the driver's side, giving a regretful smile to Faith.

"Everything changes, Alex."