Chapter One

Akari left later that evening, departing with a wave and smile that seemed somewhat tight-lipped. Hikaru wondered if she was still angry at him. It had been a long while since they were last together, after all. And their reunion had been too brief for him to really understand if she had changed that much at all.

But he was genuinely happy to see her. His old friend. When she was gone, she left behind an emptiness that Hikaru had not noticed before. Ten years only seemed that long when he looked back on it. Now he was almost stunned by how many years he had spent thinking he could visit Akari and the others if he had time. They wouldn't forget him.

They hadn't.

Hikaru's fingers closed around his fan – his constant reminder. The familiar wood suddenly felt dizzying to him now. He put it down. Then picked it up again.

"Toya," he said presently. "Wanna play?"

In response, his rival put down the newspaper he was reading. His eyes bore into Hikaru's with all the steel they always had.

Akira smiled.

"I thought you wouldn't ask," he said as he knelt down by the board.

Hikaru and Akira had played Go together every day for quite a few years now. They had long since stopped keeping count of how many games they had won against each other (although Hikaru always maintained he had won more). But each time they sat down at a Go board and faced each other, it would be like of their first encounters: they would place their stones down and probe each other out and then attack without any reservations.

They knew each other so well it was always a delight to learn something new.

And today, Akira gazed unwaveringly at Hikaru, as if trying to discover a new chink in his armour. It did not take him long to figure out what was on Hikaru's mind.

"That friends of yours," he said. "How long have you known her?"

"Longer than I've known you," Hikaru replied.

Akira nodded. "I thought so," he said. Then he added, "She's not a Go player at all, is she?"

"No," said Hikaru, "she isn't. Just my neighbour from a long time ago."

They lapsed into silence. Hikaru gripped his fan tightly. Akira knew that meant he was concentrating.

In the end, Akira won the game by two-and-a-half komi, and the first thing he said after they put the stones away was:

"Do you want to see her again?"

"Yeah," said Hikaru, scratching his cheek, "but…"

"But that?"

"I just remembered I don't have I don't have her phone number or her address or anything."

"This is why you're a fool," said Akira, "and why I win more matches against you."

Hikaru snorted indignantly. "Excuse me! I win more games than you!"

"Who made that idiotic cut into my territory when I clearly had it well-defended?"

"Who turned that into a decent move and made a great comeback?"

"You still lost in the end."

"… Shut up."

Akira peered closely at Hikaru's face, which seemed slightly more defeated than it should have been.

He said, "You should try and find her."

Hikaru was sombre. "It's not just her. I miss everyone at the Go club I used to hang out with. Do you remember joining the Go club in middle school just so you could play me?"

Akira nodded stiffly. The memory was still somewhat painful for him.

"If you didn't do that," Hikaru said, "I would have stayed with my friends forever."

To that, Akira simply closed his eyes. "Friends, huh?"

"It wasn't the same for you."

"No, it wasn't," Akira admitted. "You were my first and only, Shindo."

"Toya…"

"It's strange but…" Akira began slowly. "If that's what I did to you, I don't regret it at all."

Hikaru was starting to smile. "I don't either," he admitted. "I'm glad."

"You always did have a choice, Shindo."

Hikaru said, "So did you."

Akira simply shook his head and gave Hikaru a melancholy smile. They had always been two thoroughly different people. Their childhoods had been could not have been further removed, for a start.

He thought about Hikaru's longing for his friends, and he said, "I can't miss something I've never had."

Hikaru figured he had better begin his search while he had the momentum and the keen desire to do so. The next day, he made his way back to his old town while Akira headed off to a tournament. Hikaru would not have asked Akira to accompany him even if he had been free. They headed their separate ways, each fuelled by their own resolve.

Finding Akari was no cakewalk. Hikaru had expected as much.

Nevertheless, it was still difficult to contain his disappointment when he knocked on the door of Akari's old house and found a matronly middle-aged woman instead of his childhood friends. She had a ready smile and seemed perfectly prepared to let Hikaru drink all her reserves of lemonade. In spite of her friendliness, she owned a pair of bulldogs that greeted Hikaru with leering eyes and mouths wide open to reveal rows of jagged, yellowing teeth. Hikaru decided it was best to move on from there. The lady knew nothing about the house's previous owners.

Haze middle school was his next destination. He had never been there in years and as he drove towards the school, he was aware of a fluttering sensation in his stomach. Nervousness. He was used to this feeling. He had in fact learned to treat it the same as anticipation. His hands gripped his steering wheel tighter. He was ready for this.

He stepped out of his car and was momentarily stunned.

He remembered the trees that peppered the sides of the path. They were cherry blossoms, all in full bloom to signify the start of a school year. Hikaru could vividly remember his first day of school, running along this path; all he could think about at the time was how much he was looking forward to joining the Go club. Memory had caused the exact specifics of his surroundings to become vague in his mind. Now, as he traversed the path, he could see each detail in fine, acute detail. He wondered if Sai had ever felt like this.

None of the students turned to give him a second glance. He did not look at them either. He was wholly focused towards the old science building. He knew the way, of course. He had certainly not forgotten that.

It looked different. More up-to-date, Hikaru thought. He peered through the window and looked for any signs of Go being played, but there was nothing to see except science equipment and posters of the periodic table. Hikaru looked away. He would have to ask a student.

"The Go club?" a wiry young boy who was probably a first year said when Hikaru asked him his question. "The Go building's that way, next to the library."

The Go club had its own building now? Hikaru was impressed.

It turned out that the building adjacent to the library was not too large, about the size of the science building. Hikaru recognised it at once: it was the building of the old Shogi club, but with extra rooms attached to accommodate the Go club.

Hikaru walked inside. The hallway smelt of fresh pine. Hikaru remembered the old science room smelt like disinfectant. Perhaps this was a change for the better.

The rooms dedicated to the Go club were neat, orderly, and the walls actually had a few photos and awards hung up on it. Hikaru discovered that Haze had placed runner up in the district tournament about six times in the last fifteen years or so, and it had won twice. Hikaru walked along the hallway, admiring the pictures of the teams who had taken a place, until he came to the very first photo at the end.

It was a picture of Tsutsui, Mitani and him that had been taken, he realised, just before that fateful match with Kaio middle school. Mitani was looking away from the camera, sporting that sour expression Hikaru could remember vividly. As for Tsutsui, he was smiling. Hikaru shivered and felt a wave of nostalgia overcome him. He took a step back.

"Oi, what are you doing here?"

Hikaru jumped, startled by the sudden voice behind him. He swung around.

Standing before him was a man who seemed quite familiar somehow. It took a few moments for his name to come to Hikaru.

"K-Kaga!"

Tetsuo Kaga waved his fan, and smirked.

"Been a while, squirt."

Clearly, Kaga refused to acknowledge that Hikaru had grown taller than him.

Tetsuo Kaga, Shogi extraordinaire, had become the instructor of Haze middle school's Shogi and Go clubs. Age had not diminished the roguish glint in his eyes, although he had a beard now and was a bit squatter than Hikaru remembered him.

"You're paying," Kaga said.

"For what?" Hikaru said confusedly.

"For ramen, what else?"

"Why me?" Hikaru groaned. "Can't we go halves?"

Kaga fanned himself, yawned, stretched and scratched his back.

Then finally he seemed to think carefully about what to say next.

"No."

Hikaru drove Kaga to the nearest ramen stall and paid the bill. Kaga was his senpai, after all, Hikaru thought with a sigh.

As it turned out, Tetsuo Kaga was a big eater. After the fifth bowl, he let out a belch and then began to talk. By that stage, Hikaru was beginning to surprise himself by how patiently he was putting up with it all.

"Heard you won a few titles," Kaga said. "Knew you could afford the ramen."

"Er, yeah." Hikaru looked up. "What've you been doing lately?"

"Me?" Kaga laughed. "After I left school, I thought I could turn pro, like you did with Go. But well..." He shrugged. "It didn't work out so well. I've been Shogi instructor at Haze for a couple of years now, and then last year, they shoehorned me into teaching Go as well."

It seemed Kaga had felt the pull to revisit his childhood, too. Hikaru smiled. "The Go club's gotten really big now."

"You don't say? All the schools watch out for Haze these days."

"Good," said Hikaru softly.

Kaga reached into his pockets and pulled out a cigarette and lighter. He lit the cigarette and exhaled, slowly. Hikaru had seen many men smoke, particularly in Go salons. But it was somehow distracting to see Kaga smoke.

"Um..." he spoke up at length.

Kaga looked at him. "What?"

"Do you know where Akari is?"

Kaga exhaled some more smoke. "Nah, who's she?"

Hikaru remembered that Kaga had never known Akari very well.

"What about Tsutsui-san?" he asked.

Kaga said nothing for a moment.

"You've forgotten him too?" Hikaru asked, dismayed.

But then Kaga shook his head. Deftly he extinguished his cigarette and turned to face Hikaru.

"He's been all right," he said.

"Er, how so?" Hikaru asked, suddenly nervous.

He had come too far to shy away from inquiring about Tsutsui. Akari had been vague about what happened as well. He wished he had remembered to ask.

"Want to ask him?" Kaga asked him abruptly.

Hikaru gulped, steeled himself and nodded.