Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended.

A Jasper For Me beta'd & boy, do I love her. Ffaddward, Livie79, ttharman, & ashley0125 preread. I'm quite the whore, apparently.

Chapter Fifteen

"Wow. Hi." Bella said hesitantly.

"Hi. A little help?" I asked from behind the two large paper bags of take-out I held in my arms.

She nodded and grabbed one of the bags before letting me in. Pointing towards the tiny, wooden coffee table in front of her couch, she said, "You can set that over there. I'll go grab plates and silverware."

"I hope you're hungry," I called towards the kitchen.

Bella appeared with two plates, two forks and two Shiner Light Blonde's. "Starving, actually." She peeked in the bags and said, "Jesus, did you order the entire menu?"

I sighed, resting my hands on my hips. "I didn't know what you'd like. I went a little overboard, huh?"

"No." A tiny smile played with her lips as she handed me my beer. "Although, if you managed to completely forget dumplings, I might have to kick your ass out."

"If I forgot dumplings, I'd expect you to kick my ass out," I said seriously before taking a swig of beer.

We sat on our asses around her coffee table, digging through each container of fucking amazing food. I handed her the white paper bag filled with spring rolls, only to have her shake her head.

"Don't tell me you're already full? You haven't eaten anything yet," I said with a mouthful of beef and broccoli. Just so you know, it's only okay to speak with your mouth full when eating overpriced, delicious Chinese food.

"I don't like spring rolls," she admitted as she stuck her fork directly in the container of food, completely foregoing the use of her plate.

"Oh." I can honestly say I've never heard anyone say that before. "To each their own, I guess."

"But..." She moaned. "This Chang's Spicy Chicken is about to make me cry. It's so fucking good. God, the things I would do to this chicken if you weren't here."

Reaching over, I attempted to fork a piece of the chicken that was about to cause Bella to defile the food. I physically recoiled as she hissed and swatted my hand away.

"Hey! Stay away!"

Smirking, I said, "I forgot you're an only child. There's this thing called sharing..."

"Shut the fuck up." Bella laughed and pulled further away, out of my reach. "Get your own Chang's Spicy Chicken."

"I did!" I pointed at her in disbelief. "It's being held hostage."

"Sorry, but this is my favorite. You should have foregone the two orders of lo mein for more Chang's. Go on with your bad self and enjoy that beef and broccoli."

"You're serious right now?"

"Dead serious," she said with laughter. "And just because I'm laughing, doesn't mean I'm not serious."

"Fine," I pouted. "I guess I'll know what to order for next time."

Bella gave me an odd look as her laughter died down. "How's Emmett?"

"He's good. Why?"

"Just asking." She shrugged. "How's med school going for him?"

"Good, I guess. He doesn't talk about it much, at least not to me, but that's probably because he still has a long fucking way to go."

"Yeah," Bella nodded and opened the container of Kung Pao shrimp. "But if it's what he wants to do, I'm sure he doesn't care how long it will take." I shrugged, not really knowing what to say. "What are you going to do?" she asked.

"After the beef, I'm moving on to the orange chicken."

Bella smiled and said, "No. I meant with your life."

"Isn't that a bit heavy? We have yet to read our fortunes, and you're asking me what I want to do with my life?"

"So?"

I sighed and began folding my napkin. "I don't know. I got my business degree, but I'm not really sure what to do with it now. I wish I could get paid for hanging out with Seth."

"Have you looked for any jobs?"

I gave her a pointed look. "Not exactly. But it's almost summer. Maybe I'll find something part time."

"Yeah." Bella stared into her lap and said, "I'm going to get some water. Need some?"

I shook my head and watched her disappear into the kitchen. Grabbing the bag, I pulled out the six fortune cookies that we were given due to the size of the order. I carefully chose one and unwrapped. Bella sat back down next to me and grabbed her own cookie.

"You have to read it out loud," she said. "You go first."

"But then it won't come true," I teased.

"It's not a wish. Go!"

Squinting, I read the fortune. "All the puzzles in your life will soon fit into their proper place."

"That's a good one." Bella glanced at my fortune before reading hers. "Be assertive with decisive action is needed..." She trailed off and looked up at me. "I need to ask you something."

"Okay."

"What are you going to do when you get the money? I mean, like, what are you going to use it for?"

I hadn't actually thought about it. What I did with it didn't really matter, it was the fact of just having it. "I don't know."

"Do you know anything?" She snapped, which caught me off guard. Again, with the mood swings.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I stared at her and said, "Yeah. I know some things."

"Other than how not to puke after taking five Jager bombs in a row."

Ouch.

"I know that even when you're trying to be a bitch, I still like you."

"Shut up, Edward. I'm trying to have a serious conversation."

"So am I. You're cute when you get mad."

"Edward."

Reaching for my beer, I rolled my eyes and mocked her tone. "Bella."

"I don't see this going anywhere," she boldly blurted out.

"What?"

"This. Us. Not that there ever really was an us, but you know what I mean."

"Are you serious?" My eyes stayed on her, which caused me to knock over a container of sweet and sour sauce as I set my beer on the coffee table.

"Yeah. Yes." Bella stood, walked down the hall and returned with two rags and spray bottle of cleaning shit.

"I can do that," I said, but she shook her head and wiped up the sauce with the wet rag. "Okay, uh...why do you not see this going anywhere?"

"I can't really focus on a relationship right now," she replied, suddenly focused on scrubbing the table. "I'm busy with work, class, Charlie and Gram. There's just no room for you in my life right now."

"You're just scared," I accused. "Don't bullshit me."

Bella gathered the food together, putting the trash in one of the paper bags, and ignored me. So, I pushed her buttons to get a reaction, because I wasn't letting her get away with this without a fight.

"The only reason you agreed to date me in the first place was because you thought you couldn't get hurt! It was supposed to be easy, right?" That seemed to catch her attention, but it wasn't enough. "You made sure to keep your distance, never getting too close. Is that how you play this? Now it's becoming too much and you're pulling away."

"Don't pretend like you know me, Edward."

"Don't pretend like I don't know you! Christ, Bella. Just because James fucked you over, doesn't mean every guy will do the same thing."

"Excuse me?" She glared my way, and I immediately regretted bringing him up. Actually, no. I didn't regret bringing him up. I only regretted the flash of pain it caused her when I mentioned his name.

"Alice told me about James and what he did to you," I spoke softly. "But, come on. You have to know I wouldn't do that to you."

"You don't know my life! You know nothing."

"I know that you're scared. I'm fucking scared, too, but, shit. I want you."

It was suddenly simple. God, it was so fucking simple. I wanted her, end of story.

"You're scared? Well, I'm terrified. The only reason you think we have something real is because you finally found someone who will put up with your shit!" Bella snapped. "That doesn't exactly deem me your fucking soul mate, now does it?"

"No, but it's different," I mumbled. Because it was different. I thought about her all the time. I caught myself staring at her, watching her smile, waiting for her to look at me. I thought the hard part would be admitting all of that to her but, once again, Bella proved me wrong. She was always fucking proving me wrong.

"You think it's different, but it's not," she insisted again. "The only difference is that I made you wait two months before getting into my pants."

"Stop saying shit like that."

"It's true."

"You get to tell me how I feel, yet when I mention anything about you, I'm wrong? Grow up and stop being such a fucking hypocrite."

Bella let out an exasperated laugh and said, "You accuse me of being scared of getting hurt, then you shut down and basically tell me to fuck off because you can't handle me talking back. Typical Edward."

"I didn't tell you to fuck off. I'm trying to get you to understand, but you just won't listen because you're fucking stubborn," I said harshly.

"I am listening, and I do know you. You're a spoiled fucking brat! You get pissed off when things don't go your way. You try to act all bad ass, like you don't give a shit about anything. Like you don't enjoy the Cole Haan loafers you wear or the Lacoste bathing suit you own, but truth is, if you went a day without hearing the word yes, you'd flip out!"

My mouth opened to rebut what she was accusing me of, but she kept talking.

"You had a shitty situation growing up, living in boarding schools and being brought up by Carlisle and Esme. They treat you better than you deserve; they are your family and they love you, no matter how much you fuck up. Esme, your mother for all intents and purposes, would give her life for you, yet you still try your hardest to displease her."

She took a deep breath, but she wasn't holding back, no. It made me want to kiss her, oddly enough.

"Maybe you do and say things to upset her because you're trying to convince yourself you don't consider her your mother, but I know you do. And Carlisle, God bless that man for putting up with your shit, he tries to steer you in the right direction, and you have the nerve to throw it all back in his face. They are the best thing that ever happened to you, so get your shit together and realize it."

Honestly, I was shocked. Bella and I joke around and bullshit all the time, but I had no clue she felt this way. No inkling that she felt so...passionately about this. No idea she had it in her to say these things to me. I wondered how long she had been thinking all of this, and also wondered how much of it was true.

"Wow." I was stumped.

"Maybe you think I'm being a bitch, but I'm just trying to save us both from getting hurt."

"I can't promise either of us won't get hurt, but why can't you just trust me?"

"It's not worth it," Bella said. That's when the tears began. "It's just not."

I wanted to ask her how this could not be worth it, but there was no point. Why should she believe I wanted this? If someone would have told me two months ago I'd be trying to convince this girl to be with me, I would have junk punched them and told them to fuck their mother sideways.

"Not worth it?" I asked, finding it hard to speak because my throat was too dry.

All she could do was shrug. So, I laughed because this was so beyond fucked up, I could only find it amusing. This wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to fall in love, and she definitely wasn't supposed to turn me down.

"I can't believe this is happening."

"I never promised you anything," she whispered, furiously wiping at her cheeks, only to have new streams of tears take their place.

"I know you didn't, but if you think-"

"That's the problem! I didn't think. I went into this whole fucked up thing without even thinking. That's what you do to me, Edward! And of course, the person who is going to get hurt will be me. It's never you, Edward."

"No? Then why the fuck am I hurting right now?" I hissed.

"Stop," she sobbed. "Just stop."

"Stop what? You're delusional! I don't even know why I love you, Bell. You're too stubborn and snarky. You're kind of selfish in a nice way that makes you not selfish at all. It's a complete mind fuck," I practically yelled. "Oh, and you don't even like spring rolls! I mean, who the fuck doesn't like spring rolls?"

Bella suddenly stopped crying, barely even blinked, and asked, "What did you say?"

"Spring rolls," I pointed at the paper bag by my feet. "One of the best things ever."

"No." She frantically shook her head. "You said that you...you love me."

Huh. I replayed my dramatic rant and yep. I guess I had accidentally admitted that I loved her. Go fucking figure.

I chuckled darkly and said, "Well, there you have it. Surprise! I'm in love with you, Bella. But let me guess, it's still not worth it, right?"

Bella, still holding the rag in her hand, let out an audible gasp. Shaking her head slowly, I clapped my hands together once and sighed.

This fucking sucked, and I had no idea what I was supposed to say or do next.

"Right, so..." I pushed past Bella, grabbed as much of the food as I could and stalked to her kitchen. I dumped the food in the trashcan and made sure to do it loud and dramatically. Because really, I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

And then I saw it, mocking me, right in the middle of her fridge. It was the photo of us, the first time she met Carlisle and Esme. Bella was sitting in my lap, one arm around my neck, while my arm was around her waist. It was the photo Esme forced us to take.

"That's just great," I mumbled to myself. I pulled the photo off the fridge to further inspect it. We looked...happy. Even back then, before I admitted my feelings for Bella, it was real. This whole fucking time, it was real to me, and I knew Bella couldn't say the same. It was too late.

Bella quietly entered the kitchen and with a shaky hand, grabbed the picture from me. "I don't...if I would have known this was going to happen..."

"Don't, Bella. Just...don't." I ran a hand over my mouth, ignoring her pity. "You'll still get your money, okay? I'll see to that." I offered, because that was the only thing I could think to say. The money obviously had to be something she was worried about.

Bella laughed to the point where her tears were ones of laughter. Yeah, it was almost creepy. "Don't you see? It was never about the money."

"What do you mean it was never about the money?" I was on the verge of shaking the fuck out of her. How could I be in love with this hopeless, confusing girl? "You could pay for school, get a decent fucking TV. Shit, you could even buy yourself a car that doesn't cost seventy-five dollars to fill the tank."

"Right. But, like I said, it was never about the money. And buying myself a new car isn't going to make me feel any better. So, why don't you keep your money and your pity."

"What is your problem?" I yelled a little too loud as she stepped backward. "You don't have my pity, Bella. You have my fucking heart." I dropped my head, fucking defeated, and said, "Yes, I realize how ridiculous that sounds, and I realize when I go home tonight and tell Emmett about all of this, he's going to call me a pussy, but I don't care. At least I'm trying here."

"I didn't think you'd react like this," she mumbled and bit her lip. "I didn't think..."

Resisting the urge to roll my eyes, I said, "Alright, Bella. Save it. I get it."

She stared at the photo in her hands for a beat too long. "You don't have to pay me, but I'll still help you."

I laughed. "Don't bother."

Bella finally looked up. "Edward."

"I should probably go," I said quickly and walked out of the kitchen. Cause why the fuck was I still here? She didn't want me. There was no point.

"I don't want you to be upset..." Bella whined as I grabbed my keys and phone from the floor.

"I'm only upset because you never sucked my dick," I spat. "You could have at least returned the favor last night."

Was it true? Not really.

Was it low? The lowest.

Was it immature? Yeah.

Did I give a fuck? Hell, no. I was wounded and needed her to feel some sort of pain as well. It was apparent from the look on her face I had achieved what I wanted, and I had never felt more disgusted.

Bella sucked in a breath and said, "You don't mean that."

My douche tendencies were about to overflow. I couldn't stop it; it was second nature. Also, I was still pretty pissed she didn't like spring rolls. "Next time you're going to shoot a guy down, make sure you do it before he spends two hundred bucks on food, okay?"

"You said you were going to make dinner. Buying take-out doesn't constitute as making anything." Bella paused. "I don't know when things started to change between us..."

"I do," I scoffed. "It was obviously when we fucked."

"Get the fuck out."

And that's exactly what I did.

A/N: I'm intrigued to see who people are more upset with- Bella for being a bitch, or Edward for being a dick. I promise there is a reason for all of this, so hang in there! Thanks so much for reading. See you next Friday! :)