Uncontrollable Desire

Something in me told me that this new attitude of Mark's was only a façade he was putting on to keep himself from wanting to get into my pants. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to be playing around with me at all. That following day he got me up bright and early so he could get me enrolled in school. As soon as we were done with all my paperwork, we straight for the house where he forced me to not only wash those same dishes I placed in the dish washer, but other things as well.

I had to sweep, mop, and vacuum every inch of the house, dust off any mantles, or shelves that he had, wipe down every single window of the house, clean the bathrooms, and did I mention yard work! I felt like a freaking slave once I was completely done with everything. For two straight weeks it was like this. Every night after I finished, I didn't even bother to speak to him; I just drug myself up to my room, showered, and then came back downstairs for dinner. Sometimes I even skipped dinner and went downstairs to the gym to work out. I was a little confused one night when he came down with Lexi in her walker and started working out with me. I tried not to smile looking at his perfectly put together body. That's when I remembered what a horrible guy he was being towards me. There was no way I could ever admire someone like that.

"You alright?" he asked as he slid some food in front of me one night.

I glared at him not believing he had the nerve to ask me that after all that work he put me through. "What do you think?"

He shrugged, "Well besides tired as hell…you look like you lived."

I rolled my eyes and started digging into my food. Lexi giggled a little and then said something that took me off guard.

"Ki-kat…I seepy…." She said after yawning. Mark and I looked at her with soft smiles. She then started reaching for me so I picked her up and held her against my chest. She yawned again and then laid her head on my breasts.

"You're great with her Kitty." He said. "I think you'll make a wonderful mother someday."

I looked at him with confusion. "Oh now you want to be nice to me."

He chuckled, "I've been nice to you Kitty…you just don't like that I'm treating you the way I should have from the beginning."

I rolled my eyes and then got up from the table and went upstairs. I didn't want to argue with him for another night. It always came back to the same damn thing over and over again. Part of me wanted to believe he didn't mean some of the things he said but…it really hurt me sometimes.

I went into Lexi's room and took out my cell phone to play a lullaby I learned growing up. As it started to play, I started to sing to her while walking around slowly in her room. She was pretty feisty at first but after singing for a little while longer she finding began to relax. I sat down in the rocking chair and kept singing until she finally fell asleep. She was so beautiful laying in my arms, peaceful as a bird. Once I was sure she going to stay asleep I placed her in her crib and covered her up. I then kissed her forehead and watched her sleep for a few moments. As I looked at her I started to notice how much she resembled me as a baby. She didn't really have that many traits of my father but…a lot of me somehow…

"Katrina?"

I looked up at the door and saw Mark standing there with his hands in his pockets.

"Can we talk?" he asked now in this more relaxed tone.

I sighed, "Why should we? It's just going to end badly as usual."

He sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Come on Kat…please?"

I didn't know what it was about the way he said that but I couldn't say no. I glanced back at Lexi once more before heading out of the room, followed by him. I was going to walk to my room but he gently pulled my arm making me stop in the hallway. He then turned me around so my back was against the wall and he was facing me. I sighed deeply and then began to ramble like crazy.

"Ok Mark I know I've been defiant but let's be honest you haven't been the best guy either lately."

"Kitty-"

"-I understand now you're trying to push those urges away from your mind and it's better if you act like an ass so I'll be turned off too."

He smirked a little, "Katrina-"

"-And I know that we shouldn't have these feelings for each other but I guess sometimes it's hard not to fall in love once you've gotten so deep with a person and-"

Before I could finish my sentence, Mark had grabbed my head and pressed his lips roughly against mine. I started to push him away but then he sucked on my bottom lip and gently nibbled it with his teeth sending chills through my spine. I moaned into his mouth as his tongue slid into my mouth, deepening the kiss. I finally wrapped my arms around his neck as he pressed my back against the wall, still kissing me. When he finally pulled away from me, I saw instant regret mixed with total lust in his eyes, the very feelings that were surging through my body. I slowly pulled my arms around myself as he backed away from me, while licking his lips. Mine were starting to swell as blood rushed to them. I yearned for his kiss for so long and now that I just got it…I wasn't sure how to react.

"I'm sorry Kat…" he said as he began to head to his room.

I stood there watching him as tears filled my eyes. So it was true, he was only putting on a façade just to bury his wanting for my body. I wiped fresh tears from my eyes as I headed to my bedroom, taking one last glance at his bedroom before I walked into my own. I decided to lock the door that night that way he couldn't be tempted to come get in bed with me. Then again…I guess he wasn't the only one I should have been concerned about…after all…there was my own body as well.