Alas, this is the last of the existing parts, and cobbled together from a shortie and the intro to the next real chapter at that. I hope to get back to this story someday, but it requires an upbeat frame of mind that has been scarce the past couple of years, very much so since a house fire that lost nearly everything I owned except my dog and what was in my car (laundry and a few RPG books)

txy08x9_findAnail_plus

2009-04-20 - hammered this one out after a couple days of not getting more than a few sentences on something else.
2011-10-17 - added a few scenes from the beginning of Part 9, up to where I skip over the First Exam proper, to fill this out into a worthwhile FFn chapter

Little things can have seemingly unreasonably huge effects. It's been said before, but it's worth repeating... Sometime ages ago, one mercant makes a better deal than another, so one family becomes a major trading house instead of another, so the favored route to their home city is by a different road, so a horse loses a nail from its shoe in a different place. It gets stuck in the soft sole of a panicked man's house-slipper, so he's slower and less able to travel...

The question, of course, is whether things turn out the better or worse from that normally minor injury. Let's find out, shall we?

Legend of Explosive Youth!

Chapter 8x: Finding a Nail in your Shoe

Konoha Year 58

Just outside Konohagakure

A gasping civilian man struggled as he carried his wife through the dark forest, staggering with every step. The lower part of her yukata as well as his arms were dark with liquid, and he stumbled and almost fell as she paused in her labored breathing to clutch at her stomach and scream. The large dog running after them whined worriedly.

A few more panting breaths, and she gasped out, "Put, put me down, Anata... It's too late..."

"No! I..." Another step on his injured foot made him wince and grimace. "I have to get you to the medic-nin, Hitomi! I can't call myself a man if I fail!"

"There's no question of that, you pigheaded ass, this is AAAGH! FUCK! ... all your fault in the first place! There's no goddamn time, find a clear spot and put me DOOOOOOOW! Shit, you've delivered enough puppies, you know how these fucking things work!"

Legs frozen by shock, he goggled for a moment at his usually sweet, traditional, deferential wife before stammering, "But... Already?... I mean... they said..." He stopped babbling and clenched his own teeth as as the woman's face twisted up in pain and her hand tightened punishingly on his bicep. "All right, all right!"

As gently as he could, he lowered his love on the grass in a moonlit clearing, then quickly unfastened his own yukata top and spread it on the ground before moving her onto it. The woman panted for a few more seconds before cutting loose with another scream, her fingernails leaving gouges in his now unprotected arm as she grabbed it again.

Wincing but not really even noticing the damage, he fumbled with the obi that had been tied hurriedly before leaving their outlying homestead, then drew his belt knife and reached to cut it away.

Before he could, he found himself unable to move, one small hand on that wrist and another on the opposite shoulder. Both held him in a grip as immutable as stone as the dog belatedly began barking and growling. From just behind him, a young girl's voice demanded calmly but firmly, "What's the situation here?"

Yelping, he jerked in surprise and would have fallen if not for the unbending support of the unseen person still restraining him. "Ah! Oh, shinobi-sama, it's my wife! The baby is coming, but I stepped on something sharp and I couldn't carry her fast enough..."

Understanding, the dark-haired young kunoichi eased him back into a balanced position, then let go before firmly nudging him to the side. "In that case, it seems your luck isn't so bad after all. I'm an apprentice medic-nin, and Tsunade-sama is right nearby..." suddenly remembering her teacher's unfortunate phobia and how bloody childbirths were, she hastened to add, "but we won't even need to bother her with something as normal as this, I'm a great student!" She gave her best reassuring smile before using a quick chakra exercise to make the knotted belt untie itself, then helped Hitomi shrug the yukata off and tapped a pair of nerve clusters on her back to deaden the pain.

Sighing in relief the woman lay back afterward, arm stabbing out like a striking snake to grab her man again as he tried to step back and let the women deal with the terrifying process since someone else had taken charge. "No you don't, husband," she ordered. "Make yourself useful and put my head in your lap, if shinobi-sama doesn't need you for anything."

"Er, yes dear." Almost hopefully he asked, "Is there anything you need of me, shinobi-sama?"

Stifling a most unprofessional urge to giggle, the teenager shook her head and replied, "You can just call me Shizune, and helping make your wife comfortable is the best thing for you do do. Us girls'll handle the rest. Though you should probably keep a hand on your dog's collar as well, he could get anxious with a stranger around when one of his people is hurting."

She whipped out a short sequence of hand seals and produced a gentle stream of warm water to fill a large bowl pulled from her pack, then used it to wash away the sticky amniotic fluid still clinging from when Hitomi's water broke. She spoke reassuringly as a quick medical jutsu confirmed the baby's condition - stressed of course, but no more than normally under the circumstances. More detailed readings would have to wait until afterward, when he could be cleaned up and Tsunade could check on him. "Just keep it up, ma'am, you're doing fine, and your baby is too. It looks like this is your first time, ne?" Seeing the young husband's hurried nods even as another contraction rippled across his wife's abdomen, she continued, "Normally a first delivery takes a long time because things have to stretch enough for the baby to come out, but there's techniques to help with that, and to make recovering afterwards faster and easier. We should be done here in just a couple of hours," she said brightly.

"HOURS!" Hitomi shouted, all but crushing her husband's hand. After the next contraction passed, her next few comments were quite unprintable.

Shizune hid a snicker by turning to rummage in her pack. She'd actually assisted with a birth a part of her first C-rank mission, before even ever seeing a medic jutsu used, but first time parents all acted the same whether they were wealthy nobles or hard-scrabble peasants.

In the end it was a bare hour and a half, the sturdy baby boy's first cries ear splitting against the quiet night background until he was washed, wrapped in Shizune's blanket, and gathered to his mother's breast. Not even she could do anything about the blood soaked and caul stained yukata that had been used as a ground sheet, however, so she apologized softly as she wrapped the mess up in it and used a training Earth-type jutsu to bury it deep enough to at least keep civilians from noticing the lingering scent, and deter wild animals from digging it up. "Come on, you can stay at our camp tonight and go into Konoha to visit the hospital in the morning," she instructed.

Having dealt with the small puncture in his foot while waiting for the baby to arrive, Shizune helped the young father to get on his feet and pick up his newly enlarged family, their vigilant dog staying close on his heels. Suddenly he charged ahead, barking and growling, and Shizune dashed after him when she heard a terrified squeal.

She returned a moment later cuddling a small, terrified piglet, the dog following again with his ears laid back and growling every few seconds. "It's just my piggy Ton-ton," she reassured the nervous parents, before saying quietly, "Tsunade-sama is feeling a little off right now, she lost someone very close to her recently. It's a wound that can't be healed by jutsu... Please let me do most of the talking with her, alright?" She felt a fresh stab in her own heart at the thought of her uncle, but kept her professional mien in place.

"Of course, Shizune-sama," the young man replied quietly. "I can just go on to Konoha now that you fixed my foot, there's no need for us to intrude."

"The gates are closed by now anyway," a new voice cut in from overhead. "And I don't need coddling, Shizune. You can turn around and go back yourself if you're going to try to treat me with kid gloves."

"Of course not, Tsunade-sama!" the younger kunoichi acknowledged. Hoping to distract her teacher, she suggested, "Would you like to examine the baby, shishou? He seems to be fine, but I am only your apprentice."

Stomach quivering slightly at the lingering smell of blood despite the light buzz and deadened senses from the sake she'd been drinking since making camp, the legendary medic hesitated a moment before hopping down from her tree and passing a green-lit hand over the infant where he lay snoozing with his mother, in his father's sturdy arms. She frowned, made a few handseals, then applied both palms to the tiny body, and the new parent caught his breath in sudden fear.

"What is it, Tsunade-sama?" he gulped.

"Nothing to worry about. Just... This kid, don't let him try to be a ninja when he grows up."

Shizune was also confused, but let the father speak since she'd already been reprimanded. "Not a ninja? ... I don't understand, is there something wrong?"

Rather than answer directly, Tsunade turned and started walking slowly away. "Being a ninja is a shit job," she said, spitting the words out like bitter fruit. "The only worse job is to be a leader of ninja. Anyone who wants a happy life, should stay as far away from ninja as possible... Come on Shizune, we're going."

Startled, the girl protested, "Going? But, our camp things, and we can't just leave these three alone can we?"

Waving such concerns away, Tsunade replied, "They can have the camp stuff, I'll just buy us some more at the next town. The patrols will keep an eye on them overnight so there's nothing to worry about." She pulled a fresh bottle of sake out of a pocket and kept walking away.

Hurriedly, Shizune bowed and made her apologies for the abrupt departure. "It looks like we'll be leaving you after all, but the camp is just past those trees. Please excuse Tsunade-sama, it's a trying time, um ... actually, I don't think I ever got your names..."

"Cliff, I'm Rock Cliff, and this is my wife Hitomi and little Lee. We'll never forget your help, Shizune-sama, and thank Tsunade-sama for us as well. Buddha bless you both, and bring your hearts healing and good fortune in your travels."

Knowing her teacher, the girl had little doubt that they'd need all the blessings they could get as far as good fortune was concerned. As for healing hearts... Oh yeah, every blessing they could get.

The present, Konoha Year 71

It wasn't home, but it felt oddly familiar. True, the trees were more gnarled, the leaves more vibrantly green, and there was actually some underbrush rather than the pathetic bits of shrubbery that made up the forest floor in and around the Hidden Mist.

The sunlight filtering through said leaves and tree branches was definitely more intense, and Katsu didn't really know whether to like it or not.

"I still can't see why we can't wear something stylish," he heard for the umpteenth time during this trip. "This is all so drab and impersonal! Not fashionable at all. Senseiiiiiiii!"

He silently thanked the Gods and whatever other forces were listening -getting a quiet chuckle from a deeply buried corner of his soul in return, which he replied to with a mental growl- that even with his team being an all kunoichi one, only one of those kunoichi was typically going on about that sort of stuff.

Still ...

Whatever possessed him to plead, intimidate, bribe and annoy the right people to get put up as their Jounin sensei two years ago, he didn't quite know.

He gave a quiet sigh.

Alright, so maybe he did know. And he was also pretty sure that there were people besides the voice in his head - and how weird was it to actually not feel all, well, _weird_ about _that_ bit? - who also knew.

One of whom, he was certain, had taken great pains to coach Mina in the art of seeming unthreatening despite everything else ... and while Katsu was grateful, for that and for a few other things Michiru-kun had done ever since that day in the Stone Country when they were both still genin and running for their lives, he was pretty sure the Kaiou heir was laughing her ass off at his expense.

Oh well, wouldn't be the first time. Or the last time.

He alighted atop the thick branch of a tree sitting right on the crest of the hill, the three genin kunoichi picking their own perches for what looked to be a momentary pause in their travel.

"Sugoiii," Mina was the first to break the silence. A few miles ahead, down the slight slope and through a thicket of woods that were far more cluttered than the giant forest back 'home', sat the merging of urbania and rusticims that was Konohagakure. "That's one _big_ wall."

Katsu had to agree. The Hidden Mist had no such barrier between them and the 'outside' world, and while this was in part due to the fact that most of that Hidden Village hung in the air, suspended between giant trees or carved into them, there was also the fact that most of Kirigakure's protections were split. The oldest and most established Clans and Houses maintained their own barriers and guards, and there was no real unified force that would defend the Village as a whole. The Mist Jounin blamed it on the place's backstabbing politics.

For a moment, though, there was no real consideration of things other than the now, and in that *now* the image of Konohagakure bathed in the pinkish light of a dawning sun ...

"Wow," Mako breathed from where she stood.

"Impressive," Ami concurred, her voice quietly intense.

"Just don't let the pretty picture overshadow the underneath," he told them after five or so minutes.

"If it's so important for a shinobi to do that, sensei," Mina groused ... somehow, she managed to pull off doing it cutely, which had Katsu's eyebrow twitch. "Why do we even need to bother with these?"

'These' were the plain grey travelling cloak and wide brimmed straw hat that he'd added to their gear and told them to wear as part of their travel kit before they'd left the Mist.

"Because some people won't bother with second glances," Katsu shrugged. He gave Mina a level look. "Also, I'm a 'mean and vindicative ogre who doles out cruel and unusual punishment to the unsuspecting and undeserving'. And on that note, you weren't exactly quiet with your grumbling last night."

Mina had the grace to look embarassed and weakly laugh.

"But some people do bother to look," Mako interrupted. Her look was perhaps the most changed, owing the fact to the bandages that she'd wrapped around her limbs and head, even beneath the usual bodyglove. "And they will find out, sooner or later." The Hoshigaki girl looked faintly uncomfortable with that.

"Take whatever advantage you can," Ami and Katsu said, the kunoichi in perfect synch with her teacher. He gave her a look.

"What? You end up telling us that so often it's hardly a surprise," the blue-haired genin and medic-nin in training noted.

Katsu shook his head in faint bemusement, then shrugged.

"Well, that's enough wool-gathering," he spoke a moment later. "Ready to see where this takes us?"

"Hai, sensei!"

The four were off, grey shadows flitting between the trees in the light of morning, on a road towards the unexpected.

Legend of Explosive Youth Part Nine

A New Challenge for Everyone! Enter the Chuunin Exams!

With numerous segments and even more plot suggestions by Valles, Greiver, and Drakensis, tied together with Classicdrogn's usual stuff. This chapter even more than the rest is definately a team effort deserving of full co-author credit.

Gai had told his team to approach the Chuunin Exam as if it was a B-ranked mission, since there would obviously be ninja opposition in it, so the youthful trio had forgone the usual morning spar in favor of extra stretches and checking over their equipment.

"Drat, I'd forgotten about this one," Rikou sighed, running a fingertip across the deeply scored kunai she'd used to shove her uncle's zanbato away from Tazuna's neck. She'd already set three others aside as having questionable amounts of nicks from the unavoidable rough use those most basic of tools were subject to, and combined with this one's obvious unfitness for further service that meant she'd have to make a detour to a weapon shop before the test began... and there wasn't much time left before they were supposed to arrive. Worse, the shopping district was on the other side of Konoha from their training ground, and on top of that with everyone else preparing for the exams as well it was quite possible they'd have been sold out for the moment. She humphed in irritation and frowned heavily.

Looking up from where he was packing his own equipment away, Lee quicky discerned the reason for her dissatisfaction. Extending a hand he requested, "Rikou-san, may I examine it?"

"Eh? Sure, Lee, but it's really no good any more. I was just wondering whether I should keep it as a souvenir or trade it in for the scrap rebate on replacements," the girl replied. She nimbly flipped it so she could pass the handle to her team mate.

He gently repeated the gesture of feeling the gouge left in its side by the much larger weapon, almost as if calming some small animal rather than checking the flaw in a piece of equipment. He looked up and gave a brilliant smile, asserting, "I think this little guy still has some youth left, he just needs a bit of assistance!"

Rikou blinked, and Naruto scratched the back of his head bemusedly. Sometimes their team mate seemed a little odd, even to them. "Lee," she said patiently, "it's just a kunai, it can't heal. If I try to use it like that, it could break and put me in a bad situation."

Still smiling, Lee shook his head and closed both hands over the small knife. "Gai-sensei taught us all 'Neko no Kankoashi,' but he didn't mention quite how useful it was," he explained. "It reinforces the ground to avoid causing difficulty with our training weights, but I experimented with it some more. It seems that the same techinique can be used to..." Here the bowl-cut boy paused and closed his eyes, concentrating for a moment. "Reinforce!" A faint sound of chakra being molded emanated form his hands, less a squeal than a soft hiss. "...other things, as well!"

He opened his hands and passed the kunai back, gleaming and perfect, and as the girl discovered on checking the blade against a thumb, wickedly sharp. She sucked on the tiny cut and stared at Lee with amazed eyes, while Naruto jumped to his feet in excitement.

"Hey, hey! What a kick-ass jutsu, Lee!" the blond shouted. "I never even thought of trying something like that. The power of your youth even overcame not being able to do ninja techniques, that's awesome, dattebayo!"

Lee, though, hung his head in shame as if he'd confessed to some horrible crime. "My dream is to become a great ninja using only taijutsu, but when I finally found a ninjutsu I could do, I couldn't help but search for the limits," he admitted. "Because it gives such a good idea of the structure of what it's used on, I thought about how the kunai could attain its strongest form, and then changed it to become my image."

Undeterred, the energetic fox boy punched his friend's shoulder to get him to look back up. "That's not a problem, Lee," he asserted. "Even a super-awesome ninja still needs secret techniques to use in a pinch, different from what's expected. Like your Lotus, or that 'Murasu' Rikou and I made!"

"Yeah," Rikou agreed hastily, seeing Lee look at her uncertainly. "Thanks for saving me from having to rush over to the weapon shop," she told him. "There's not a lot of time left before we need to turn in our application forms, you know." Quickly, she gathered up the other damaged kunai and held them out entreatingly. "Could you fix these for me, too?" She chuckled at the way her almost-brother's face lit up with their acceptance and assured him, "Don't worry, we won't tell anyone about your new secret technique, so you won't be buried in random people coming to you to fix their equipment instead of buying new things!"

Ino had spotted Team Seven's entrance and started rushing over to Sasuke, only to draw up short as a certain detail caught her attention. Curious and a bit wary, she approached her rival instead and commented, "I see you found a new style, Sakura. Decided to cover up that huge forehead at last?"

The youngest Haruno seemed about to explode into another of her rants for a moment, then deflated. She puffed a tiny sigh and confided, "Ino... I'll tell you a secret I discovered. It seems the thing Sasuke-kun likes isn't an expensive scent or long, shining hair... It's being a serious ninja." She tugged unhappily at the braid she'd settled for tying her pink locks back with, before smiling tentatively and asking, "Ne, Ino-chan... If it's not too late... do you think I could borrow that ribbon again? It always looked better there than a forehead protector anyway..."

The blonde kunoichi gave her former best friend a searching stare before breaking into a massive smile that lit up the room. She grabbed the other girl in a tight hug for a few seconds before letting go to wipe at something in her eye. "Of course!" she chirped. "But... After the exams, okay?"

The pinkette's own grin widened and she nodded happily. "Until then, let's give it all we've got... you'd better not lose to anyone but me, understand?" she challenged.

"I understand perfectly... Same to you!" Ino's voice softened again for a moment, saying, "I missed you, Sakura-chan," before giving one last flash of teeth and turning to the other business at hand. "SASUKE-KUN!" she squealed excitedly, glomping on with unusual ease since the boy had thought their attentions safely diverted for once. He snorted in annoyance, while off to one side Tenten covered her mouth with one hand, trying to hide her amusement.

Of course, less than a minute later she was doing the happy-squeal-and-glomp routine herself, as she spotted her white-eyed knight Hyuuga Neji further into the room, his irked team mates glaring fire and brimstone for her presumption.

Oddly enough, the glance he shot at the Uchiha expecting bishounen solidarity in the face of annoying fangirls was met by equal (if well hidden from anyone else) heat. Neji's scowl deepened and he silently cursed the cruel hand of fate once more.

"There you guys are!" The moment was broken by Kiba's enthusiastic greeting, as the Inuzuka boy led his team mates over to stand near their fellow rookies.

Shikamaru didn't bother with the effort to wave, but aknowleged their arrival with a drawled, "Che... You're doing this troublesome thing too?"

"Looks like we're all here," Kiba cut in with a smirk. "Heh... It'll be interesting, to see how far we'll get."

"If you're smart, dude, you'll like, quit before there's any fighting." The new voice was unfamiliar, though when the Inuzuka boy noticed the speaker's Hidden Waterfall hitae-ite on his generic grey outfit, the distinctive goatee let him recognize the older teen as one of the Takigakure natives who'd shouted support for Shibuki when rogue ninja had them tied up as hostages. "You and your dog, and your team mates that don't know enough to stay out of other people's private affairs... You're our first targets!"

"Yeah right," Kiba blew him off, with a confident bark from Akamaru as well. "Like we've got anything to worry about from the likes of you, who couldn't even beat that idiot's weak-ass minions."

Seeing his team mate about to blow his top, the other male member of the squad, dressed similarly unremarkably but in darker grey, laid a calming hand on his shoulder and tried to defuse the situation. "Ah, take it easy, Namimaru, at least until we have more information on the upcoming tests." Nodding greetings to the members of Team 8, his eyes showed only polite recognition from within the deep blue tattooed bands leading back toward his ears.

Their kunoichi third member had hung back a step, hurriedly fussing with her dark hair, patting down her orange halter top and blue shorts, adjusting the scarf with her hitae-ate at her neck and the pouch at her waist. Finishing the brush-up she stepped around them and put on an equally brilliant smile, stepping close enough to run a hand down Shino's jacket-covered bicep as she purred, "Don't worry Namimaru, Mizonabe, I'm sure there'll be a chance to ... come to grips against ... the outsiders our village hails as heroes and test our best." Batting her eyelashes at the stoic Aburame heir, she introduced herself, "Hi, I'm Ume, Hidden Waterfall's Dragonfly Princess. Is it true your whole clan uses insect styles?"

A small drop of sweat snuck out from behind the arm of Shino's sunglasses before trailing down and vanishing behind his collar as he tried to come up with a response suitable for both her words and less verbal messages.

Shaking off the restraining hand, Namimaru sneered and curtly ordered, "Cut that out, Ume, you look like a disgrace! Acting like these outsiders are some kind of celebrities. Come on!" Grabbing the back of her belt he hauled her away from the confounded Aburame and led his team away, Misunabe giving a quick nod-bow politely and with a slight air of apology. One of the Leaf candidates their age made his way over to talk to the kids as the Taki-nin left, but they paid him no mind - or at least, no more than anyone else in a room full of highly stressed potential enemies with varying degrees of paranoia and bloodlust. "I can't believe you," he snarled, scowling at Ume. "Like, fawning all over that leaf kid... This is way serious, you know? No matter what, we gotta shoot this gnarly curl and get stronger... That heinous Suien could never have got close to succeeding if Waterfall had more strong ninja to guard the village instead of having to send everyone but a few genin to fill missions for Daimyo-sama. No throwing in the towel, no mellowing out, and no hanging with the competition, dig?"

The kunoichi's face fell and she nodded contritely before perking up to say, "Well, there's always after the exam! Shino-kun and me could like, celebrate our promotions together..." She trailed off and a light blush formed on her cheeks, imagination running away with her and the tall, dark, strong, quiet, cool and handsome Leaf-nin who'd stood up for her and her friends.

Namimaru just grumbled and glared at the floor as her eyes glazed after a few seconds, and she giggled softly while rubbing an itchy nose. At least the proctors arrived before too long, and finally got the stupid test underway.

That's all there is to know? Say it ain't so, Joe! Say it ain't so!

Just a pair of short scenes that popped into my head one evening, explaining why my Lee is capable of even a tiny bit of chakra use when canon Lee is completely unable to. Of course, even Tsunade can't do much drunk and only willing to spend a few minutes on it - it's hardly life threatening after all, and she makes her position on the ninja life abundantly clear, so his not being brought up to full potential is not a big issue to her... At least, not at that time.

The title, of course, is the reversed form of the "for want of a nail" solliloquy.

As to timelines:

Distant past:

The Haruno clan head decides to push their bloodline abilities and find new techniques for a combat oriented age like their couterparts the Yamanaka, rather than hold to the traditional espionage and infiltration role.

Aburame silk traders expand to general carriers in place of Haruno civilian branch.

Konoha Year 1: The Uchiha and Senju clans come together to found the first ninja villiage, Madara driven out when he refuses to accept a Senju as Hokage.

(stuff happens)

KY 53 - 5 yr old Baksuta Neshan found in the wreckage of a merchant caravan wiped out by bandits

KY 56 - Momochi Keiunko meets Maito Gai on a mission to Konoha, end of Third Shinobi War, Mitarashi Minato appointed 4th Hokage over Danzo and Orochimaru

KY 57 - Momochi Keiunko resigns from service in Hidden Mist, Gai and Keiunko marry

KY 58 - death of Nawaki, Tsunade leaves Konoha, Rock Lee born, Maito Rikou born

KY 59 - Kyuubi attacks, Naruto born, 3rd Hokage reinstated over Danzo and Orochimaru

KY 60 - Orochimaru gets angry and careless after being passed over AGAIN, his experiments on Leaf citizens are discovered so he collects Anko under false pretences and flees

(spoilery stuff happens)

KY 70 - Naruto, Lee, and Rikou graduate, Tenten informally becomes Neshan's student after graduating but not having a team available.

KY 71 - SPRING: Sasuke, Sakura, et al graduate, Tenten assigned to Team 7, Chuunin Exams held in Iwagakure & Kabuto quits for the 6th time.

KY 71 - FALL: the present, Chuunin Exams held in Konoha, Cockaroachimaru arranges a party

SO LET'S GET A PARTY GOIN', LET'S GET A PARTY GOIN', NOW IT'S TIME TO PARTY AND WE'LL PARTY HARD!