Hello to all my readers! sorry for taking so long to update, I've been busy and this chapter is long-ish, remember thoughts are in italics, enjoy!

That night James couldn't sleep, he has picked up the habit of getting lost in thoughts and now, lying in his bed, he did so again, what was he to do? He wanted Kendall apart from Jo, he was well aware that Kendall would never return his feelings, but it'd be less awkward to lust after Kendall if he was single.

-Again to fake –James thought, he was a pretty good actor, he could flicker the warmest, most sincere looking smiles even in his saddest moments –Maybe it's 'cause I'm kinda cute and everyone is too busy admiring me- He smirked when he told that to himself, James knew he was a hot guy, stares from both men and women gave it away –I know that if Kendall played 'on my team', he'd want me in no time… wow! Sometimes I can be such an ass… - He scolded himself while looking at the window, morning was nearing so he closed his eyes and tried to relax, finally managing to sleep after a while.

He woke up and quickly glanced at his mobile to check the time, he had slept at lot, it was already afternoon. Kendall was long gone, nothing made James happier, he wanted to stop thinking about him for a while, it was Friday, and Gustavo agreed (after a rather long, tiresome argument) to let them have free Fridays and Saturdays, plus Sundays were universal mandatory free days so he couldn't argue on that, this was perfect for James, that day he was going to hit the gym, he decided to get even hotter because if he couldn't have Kendall, he had to find a guy to distract himself with, he put on a muscle shirt and very tight shorts, no one could resist that, so, grabbing his gym bag James opened the door of his room to step outside seeing a pair of beautiful green eyes and bushy eyebrows in the process.

-Kendall! – A bit astounded, James said, never taking his sight out of Kendall's green eyes

-Yeap, that's me- Kendall, trying to sound nonchalant said, but James noticed that Kendall's cheeks were a bit pinkish, clearly he was blushing and besides; the blond guy couldn't take his eyes off James' body

-Is he checking me out?... No, that can't be-

-So, going to the gym? - Kendall still trying to be cool asked

-Yeah, it's been a while since I last did- James replied smiling –Gotta run! Bye!-

-Bye, see you soon- and with Kendall saying this James left the apartment, a bit perkier than yesterday, but still definitely sad.

-I'm telling you Logan! All my stuff comes to life when I'm not looking at them!-

-Seems like you've been watching too much toy story again, Carlos- Logan said as they left their room, sometimes Carlos made no sense, but that was one of the things that made him cute

-Then how come that sometimes when I go back to our room, my clothes, for example, are in a completely different place?-

-Has it ever occurred you that it's because Mrs. Knight goes in and tidies up the place?-

-Oh… no, actually not- Carlos was disappointed, seems like he actually thought that his stuff came to life when he wasn't looking at them

-Come on Carlitos; don't be sad, let's watch some cartoons, shall we?-

-Ok, sure- Carlos still pouting agreed but once Logan turned on the TV and Carlos noticed that his favourite cartoon was on, his face instantly brightened up and he began to sing the opening song at the top of his lungs

-This is the cutest joy ever- Logan told himself, he could watch Carlos for hours

Meanwhile Kendall came out of his room and saw Logan and Carlos watching some silly cartoon, he ignored that, they were too old to be watching cartoons meant for little kids

-Guys I'm gonna go downstairs and meet up with Jo, don't wait for me- He told them

-Sure Kendall! Have fun- Logan told him, Carlos was just too focused on the TV to notice anything.

James wiped his forehead with a handkerchief, he was so sweaty, not only he had spent two hours and a half in the gym, he also walked back home, but it didn't matter all that much, exercise made him feel invigorated, happy and above of all, sexy, at the gym he got a lot of looks and it was the same back a Palmwoods, some girls wanted him, some others ignored him, he didn't care about them and some boys envied him while others desired him, those were the ones he cared about –But still none of them are Kendall…-

He then looked at the pool and spotted a blond guy sitting next to a blonde girl, Kendall and Jo seemed to be very much into each other, they were sitting very close together and James absolutely envied that, he wanted to have that with Kendall, he couldn't resist, he had to check out on them and see what they were up to

-Hi- approaching them, James greeted with the most cheerful tone he could pull off

Kendall and Jo took their eyes off each other to look at James, Jo smiled and stood up, she seemed genuinely happy to see him

-James! It's been such a long time- She said as she hugged him

-Yes, I know right? – He replied and hugged her back; fake joy was easy for him, but his attention was on Kendall, he was just staring at him, it almost seemed like Kendall was checking him out, like earlier that day, but that couldn't be possible, right?

Jo pulled out of the hug and looked at Kendall, afterwards she looked back at James smirking, that threw James off, was she on to something?

-So well, guys, I gotta go I really wanna take a shower, see you! - He told them as he ran back to the apartment, barely hearing Kendall's and Jo's farewells, he just wanted to have a bath and get in the bed, it didn't matter if it was too early, he wanted to sleep.

The night passed and James could actually sleep peacefully, he woke up around noon, he had seriously overslept again and Kendall had already left their room

–I really gotta wake up earlier so I can watch Kendall sleep for a bit- He thought as he headed to the bathroom to begin his every morning ritual, afterwards he left the room and saw everyone sitting in the couch, eating crisps and watching some hockey match, it seemed like they were gonna have a normal day together, exactly what James wanted

-So guys gotta go, gonna meet up with Jo at her apartment later, I really would not want to miss hockey but you know how girls can be- Kendall announced everyone and he walked out, without even realising James was standing there, that broke James' heart, Kendall again left him to be with Jo, he tried to forget about it and sat in the couch next to Carlos, he needed to be distracted

-So what are we doing today? - James asked Carlos

-Well, I dunno, Logan and I were going to hang around at the poolside after the game, do you wanna come?-

-I…- James was about to say yes when he noticed that Logan was motioning him to say no, he obviously wanted to be alone with his Carlitos

-No, I actually can't Carlos, just remember that I already was gonna meet up with some friends-

-Friends? , what friends? - Carlos asked him, that was a question James couldn't answer he had just made up that excuse

-Some I made at the gym, actually I gotta get ready, have fun guys! - James told them as he went back to his room, what was he gonna do now? , He wanted to leave Carlos and Logan alone, but he didn't wanna be alone himself, he knows he tends to think a little too much, however those thoughts exactly were the ones that provided him with an idea, he just remembered about the girls that helped him last time, Nina and Caroline, and how the latter gave him her cell phone number, he opened his closet and looked for the pair of trousers he wore that day, it was a good thing Mrs. Knight hadn't cleaned them, he searched in its pockets and there it was, the piece of paper Caroline gave him, it not only had Caroline's number, it had Nina's as well, he decided to text the Irish girl, as she was the least awkward of the two.

-"Hi, it's me James Diamond; I wanted to know if u girls wanted to hang out with me at the mall for a while, I'm a bit bored"-

Less than a minute later, he received a reply.

-"Hello, thx for inviting us, I assured Line that u would never call lol; can we meet you there in 2 hours?"-

-"Perfect! I'll c u there!"-

-Two hours? Enough time to get ready- James told himself and he began to dress

The mall was definitely one of James' favourite places; he could shop until he almost ran out of money, eat his favourite food, or just hang out and do pretty much nothing, he loved hanging out at malls, but as Big time rush got more popular, his opportunities were less and less as more people recognized him and asked for autographs and pictures, shortly after he arrived there three girls approached him wanting just that, it was obvious that his sunglasses disguise was not a very effective one, but it had to do

-Will they actually show up? - He wondered, but his question was quickly answered, he spotted the blonde and the brunette girls running towards him, maybe it wasn't such a bad thing that his shades didn't quite hide his identity

-Mr. Diamond? - Caroline asked him, she dressed down this time for a change

-Uh hu- James replied as he took off his sunglasses– I'm very glad you could make it here, but, seriously, I don't like you calling me 'Mr. Diamond', to you I'm James-

-Sure… James- Nina still hesitating told him –Would you like to do something in particular now that we're here?-

-Do you girls like to shop?-

-Are you kidding me? We love to shop! – Caroline with a wide smile responded while looking at Nina

Shopping was awesome, James bought so many stuff and he was carrying so many bags that one could say it was almost like lifting weights, Nina complained a lot that she was gonna end up broke, but Caroline assured that she would repay her later, money did not seem to be a problem to the brunette girl. James had began to actually like them, they proved to very fun to be around with, Caroline would say the most stupid jokes and Nina would beg her to stop, to her it was embarrassing but James didn't really mind them, in fact they were indeed funny (but still silly) jokes.

-Can we stop for a bit? I'm getting tired- Caroline complained, and James agreed, after a lot of walking (and a lot of people recognising him) he was ready to sit and eat something

They went straight forward to the food court, the girls were hungry so Caroline bought a hamburger, Nina had some sushi and James just wanted an ice cream, the brunette girl gobbled her meal without any hesitation while the blonde gracefully ate her sushi rolls

-They embody the tomboy and the girly girl stereotypes- James thought when he spotted some blond guy, whose hair colour was a lot like Kendall's, they even had similar hairstyles, that saddened James quite a lot.

-Wonder what's Kendall doing now; he must be having a blast with Jo- He asked himself while looking at Nina's own blonde hair, it was like pouring salt into his wounds.

-Is there something wrong? – Caroline was quick to ask him

-No, nothing- James told her, faking a relaxed tone

-Come on, there's something wrong with you Mr. Diamond… I mean James- Nina told him –You can tell us, we're trustable, you can spare as many details as you want-

James felt that that was true; the girls did seem to be trustful

-Well, you see, I like someone-

-Oh I see, and that someone seems to be making you a bit gloomy-

-Actually he's practically killing me, I'm sure he doesn't like me back- James sadly said while staring at the floor, however it still was kind of nice to let people know how he felt

-He? It's a he?- Caroline jumped off her chair and asked him, James quickly realised his mistake, he had just come out to this girls when he didn't meant to do so, but Caroline didn't seem angry, actually she seemed happy… almost too happy.

-Well, why don't you tell him? The worst thing that could happen is him saying no- Nina urged James, she was kinda right

-That's exactly what Logan told me, but what if he rejects me and doesn't speak to me ever again?-

-So Logan's the smart one of the band after all, brilliant- Nina told James smiling –But, is the boy you like a friend of yours? Because well, I'm guessing he is, one just doesn't randomly fall in love with people-

-Yeah, he's in fact very close to me-

-Then tell him silly! If he's your friend but doesn't like you as in really like you, then he'll understand- Caroline guaranteed James, she was also kind of right, but he was still scared of what could or could not happen

-Thank you girls, really, you actually did help me- He took a deep breath while saying this, but then smiled at the girls, this time his smile was real

-So, since you just told us your secret, then I should tell you mine, you know, to be even- Nina told James

-What kind of secret she could possibly have? Will she tell me about her voice? - He thought, remembering how low Nina's voice was, he had kinda forgotten even though he'd been listening to her all this time

-Nin, are you sure you're ready? - Caroline worriedly asked her friend, even her stare changed, she didn't look cheerful anymore

-Yeah, he came out of closet to us, as I said, gotta be even-

Nina looked around, as if to make sure no one was listening to her besides them, she came close to James and whispered

-I'm a man- While sounding just like one would

-What?-

Kendall knocked Jo's door, she was finally back, that meant they could do stuff a boyfriend and his girlfriend are supposed to do, that'd help him with a problem he's been having lately, he had been thinking about James more than someone who was just a friend would, it was creepy and he didn't know why was he, luckily Jo had returned and that meant everything would be normal again, right?

-Kendall, Hi! - Jo told him when she opened the door –Come on in, dad's out-

-Sure- Kendall replied to her and he stepped in, he really did miss Jo's apartment

-Come on sit besides me- Jo told Kendall while she sat down on a sofa and he quickly followed her, he grabbed Jo's hand and she pulled him close to her for a kiss, it was very sweet, a kiss from Jo was everything Kendall wanted, but there was something wrong with the whole thing, he was there with Jo, but his mind seemed to be somewhere else, for some reason he was thinking of none other than James, he couldn't take James of his head, what was wrong with him?

-You're thinking of him, aren't you? - Jo pulled out of the kiss and asked Kendall, looking straight to his eyes

-Thinking of who? – Perplexed Kendall asked Jo back, she was aware Kendall wasn't quite into the kiss

- I am not dumb Kendall, I might have been gone for a while, but I've noticed the way you look at him, I've seen it, even before I left-

-At who? - Kendall was beginning to get angry, what was Jo talking about?

-At James, Kendall! Don't play silly, I know you guys exchange stares-

-What the hell are you talking about?- Kendall yelled at Jo -I don't check out James nor he checks me out, we are not gay! Got it?-

-Kendall, stop lying to me please and yourself for that matter, you have to accept who you are, it's the only way you could ever be happy, besides I don't wanna be with a guy who doesn't actually like me and you obviously don't- Jo sounded serious and her expression was unfazed, but it all didn't matter to Kendall, Jo was wrong, she had to be wrong

-Listen, if you called me only to tell me this, then there's something seriously wrong with you, you're seeing things, I do not like James, ok?, bye! - Kendall stormed off Jo's apartment, seemingly very angry

Jo stared at the door for a while; she knew she was right, Kendall practically undresses James with his stare, and he does so too, it was all finally clear to her yesterday, when she was with Kendall at the pool and his jaw pretty much dropped when he saw James sweaty in that skimpy outfit, now to her their relationship was no more, it would stupid to stay with Kendall and live a lie, yet she felt like she had to do something

-I know what I'll do- Jo thought while she grinned, she was certain that her plan was gonna be successful

Meanwhile Kendall angrily headed back to 2J, he couldn't care less about the rest of the world, he was furious, why did all of that have to happen?

-How does she dare to say that? –He thought, who was she to imply that he 'looks' at James? He certainly doesn't, does he?

-I mean, sometimes I have, but it was just to see what kinda clothes he was wearing, or how much he had progressed on the gym, or just to see his flawless face and perfect hair… wait, what?- Kendall couldn't believe that he just admitted that to himself, was he really not gay?

-And what if Jo's right, what if I'm gay and I like James, she said that he also gives me the looks, but that can't be true, James' not gay, he seems like it, but he's not, right? And on top of all he's not into me… or is he?-

Kendall had made all the way back to 2J, but no one was there, not even his mum or Katie, it was excellent, now all he wanted was to be alone.