Notes: A BIG thank you to CytheraofNaxen for betaing the story for me!
I also wanted to thank everyone for reading this, and all the feedback, alerts and PMs.
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Rookie Blue.
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Wednesday – 8am
"Late night?" Gail asked as she glanced at Andy entering the locker room still looking half asleep.
"I'm finding it hard to sleep." Andy dropped her bag on the bench. "Guess I just have to get use to the new place."
"You might want to start by building your bed?" Gail pushed her locker door closed. "You're gonna be late."
"Thanks." Andy had stopped listening and started to wipe under her eyes, as if by doing so she could take away the dark circles and with them the weariness she felt.
Once she was dressed, Andy drew in a deep breath and pulled out her phone. Even though she knew it would be pointless she checked it, no missed calls, no messages. With that she pulled herself to her full height, flicked the phone to silent and popped it into the front pocket of her vest.
A full parade room should have meant that she would be able to slip in the back unnoticed. Simple. Well that's what Andy thought. The first problem with this plan was evident as soon as she entered the bullpen, the parade room was almost empty, not as bad as yesterday but still all the TOs were missing. Except one and that brought Andy to the second problem, Best was blocking the entrance to the room and he was talking to a plain clothed Noelle.
"Nice of you to join us McNally." Best said as he stepped aside for her to enter the room.
"Yes Sir, sorry." Andy rushed out as she made her way into the room. "Where is everyone?" She asked as she dropped into the seat next to Traci.
"I don't know, but Best has been talking to Noelle since I arrived."
"What did Jerry say?"
"He didn't come home, all I got was a text at midnight telling me he wouldn't be home and not to worry."
''He didn't say anything else?"
"No." Traci turned her head and watched Best as he left Noelle and walked to the front of the room.
"Okay people. Today some of you will be assisting officers Shaw and Williams to complete paperwork and processing from yesterdays operation." Best paused and scanned the room. "Any volunteers?" He waited for a moment. "Thank you officers Nash and Diaz. Everyone else assignments are on the board."
"That's got to be Sam's case." Andy said as Best stepped away from the front to stand just a few feet from them.
"Officer Nash," He pointed out of the room. "They're waiting for you."
"Yes sir." Traci said as she walked away.
"McNally." Best waited for the room to clear. "Swarek may not work for me any more but you do. I want you to stay clear of the investigation into Trevor Ryan, Sam should have known better than to get you involved in the first place."
"I haven't seen or spoken to officer Swarek since I returned." Andy didn't realize until the words were out of her mouth how much she wished she was lying.
"Good."
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"Well?"
Traci closed her eyes for a moment, she wasn't looking forward to seeing Andy, nor had she worked how she was going to tell her that Sam had been back for almost a day now. "Hey."
"What'd you find out?"
"They got Trevor Ryan and closed up most of his operation. Guns and Gangs has a taskforce clearing up some of the ends." Traci watched as Andy took in what she said.
"So Sam's part of that?" Andy's voice had turned a little wishful; Traci guessed she was trying to hide the hurt in her eyes.
" I don't know, they didn't say."
"But he's not under any more?"
"I don't think so." Traci didn't want to tell her but now all she could do was watch Andy take in the information.
"I thought it might have just been Boyd being an ass." Andy spoke almost as if Traci wasn't even there.
"I don't understand what's Boyd got to do with this?"
"He passed a message that Sam didn't want anything to do with me."
"Swarek didn't say that."
"No Boyd managed to make it sound like it was for my benefit... and that does sound like Sam." Andy finished.
"Are you sure? He might of-"
"He hasn't called." Andy cut her off. "He said he would call as soon as he was out and he hasn't."
Traci waited for the echo of slamming locker door that punctuated Andy's last word to die before she spoke. "Andy give him time." Traci stared her down for a moment. "We're going out for a drink, come with us."
"I really don't want too."
"You haven't wanted to do anything since you came back... Come on, just one drink at the Penny. Staying at home is not going to make him call any sooner."
"One drink." Andy agreed the smile never reached her eyes.
"You know." Traci stopped and tried to judge how Andy was going to take what she had to say, if she was even willing to listen. "Maybe you should go see him."
"Why would I do that?"
"Because you don't know what he did or didn't say or what he was thinking at the time unless you talk to him."
"I know what he was thinking; and to top it off he had Boyd of all people tell me to go away and leave him alone."
"That's my point! Does that sound anything like Sam?" Traci watched Andy as she dropped her head shaking it as she did. If she hadn't been watching so closely she wouldn't have seen her mouth the word no. "So why don't you talk to him?"
"Why didn't he contact me?" Andy paused." He said he would let me know when he was out and he didn't?"
"Call him and ask ... after we have a drink, so hurry up."
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Sam could hear the sound of laughter coming from the backyard, it brought a smile to his face for the first time in weeks. Not bothering with the front door he stepped directly onto the side path and flicked open the latch on the gate that led to the backyard.
"Look who's here!" The older man said as he crouched down next to the little girl and turned her to face Sam.
"How's my little girl." Sam gathered the small girl into his arms taking her unsteady legs out from under her. "Tickle bear." His smile broadened as the girl squirmed and started to giggle. He quickly turned her upside down, allowing him access to her small belly, her squirming intensified as his fingers went to work.
"Samuel, stop that." Sarah stepped out the back door of the house. "I'll never get her to sleep if you keep that up."
Sam turned the heaving girl up the right way and perched her on his hip. "Hey." Sam leaned in and kissed his sister on the cheek.
"Why didn't you call?" Sarah continued not waiting for an answer. "How long are you staying?"
"I didn't call because I wanted to surprise you and I can't stay-"
"You're not driving all the way back to Toronto tonight." Sarah turned her attention to the other man, "He's staying the night."
In response the older man clapped his hand on Sam's shoulder as he stepped passed him. "No point arguing."
"Don't I know it." Sam mumbled under his breath as he followed them into the house. He did use the opportunity to again tickle Ella, bring another smile to both their faces.
After dinner Sam found himself in a familiar spot, the armchair on the far side of the living room with Ella pasted out asleep on his chest. He knew he didn't tell Sarah often enough how much he enjoyed being with his family. They had only had each other for so long, the little family they did have growing up was ripped away from him.
For as long as Sam could remember his job had been to take care of his family. A job Gillian had given him as a nine year old, it sounded silly now, it sounded silly to him then but once they lost their parents it hit Sam that all they had was each other and just as he was getting use to that Sarah found Gary. She hadn't long moved to St Catherine's when she met him, he was a little older but for the first time that Sam could remember she was confortable with a man.
The day he got to walk Sarah down the aisle was the happiest of his life until Sarah called him to say that Ella had been born. At the end of that week Sam collected them from the airport as they brought Ella home and with her came an extended family and someone who needed him.
"Here." Gary said as he reached out to take Ella away. "I'll put her down."
"So." Sarah pulled the footrest in front of the armchair and settled herself in.
"I'm fine." Sam rolled his eyes as he answered the unasked question.
"Really? Have you looked in the mirror lately?"
"It's nothing."
"I am guessing this means you're back?" Sarah waited for Sam nod before she continued. "And the first place you wanted to be was here?" Sarah paused and placed her hands on his knees. "The only time you come here, outside of Sunday lunch is when you need someone to cheer you up."
"I got your message." Sam said in defense.
"You get all my messages, the best I normally get is a phone call." Sarah pulled her hands back into her lap. "This is my second 'unannounced' visit in just a few months."
'"I can't win with you."
"Do you want to tell me what's going on?"
"I guess 'I missed you' is not going to cut it?"
"No."
"Sarah … I …" Sam stopped leaned forward for a moment and then fell back into char. "I really did want to see you guys."
"Okay."
"Okay?" Sam raised his eyebrows.
"That will do for now, when you're ready you'll tell me what going on." Sarah stood and pushed the rest aside. "I have some photos for your upstairs sitting room when you've finished it."
"Thanks." Sam wondered how or who would have helped with decorating the house if Sarah hadn't been around. He loved the renovating part, right now he couldn't think of anything better than taking a hammer to one of the upstairs walls. In the last few years it had really helped to be able to take out his frustrations on the walls in his house.
"They're in your room, I did them in black and white like you asked."
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"I can drive you home."
"It's fine, I'm fine and I'm happy to just catch a cab."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Go home see Jerry, kiss your son." Andy grinned, "kiss Jerry too."
"Andy it's pouring promised you wont walk."
"I just said I'd get a cab, now please go." Andy waved and stood under the small awning until her taillights disappeared. With a deep breath Andy pulled her hood over her head and bent slightly forward and stepped out into the rain.
It didn't take long for chill to follow the rain finding its way to her skin just as easily. Her intention had been to walk the few blocks home, at first she welcomed the rain and cold but with each step Andy tried to focus on herself. Walking had always helped her; kept her sane and on track. It was one of the reasons why she didn't have a car, a leftover side effect of her mother leaving and many nights walking the streets waiting for her father to come home. At first she used the time to try and workout what she'd done to make her mom hate her so much that she would walk out and leave her only child behind.
Just like when she was fourteen, instead of walking the block as she would often set out to do, she would find herself at in the park her mother would take her to when she was seven, or outside the bar her father was 'frequenting'. Now she found herself standing in the rain, water dripping from her hair and running down her cheeks, but her eyes were focused on the vacant space in the alley. The alley next to Sam's darkened house.
Every night after work Andy found herself walking past Sam's, checking in a strange kind of way. For the first time since she had started this routine it looked different, it sounded odd, but it no longer looked empty. The house had to be empty but something had changed and that was Sam's truck. It wasn't parked neatly next to the house, that detail confirmed that he was home and it seemed now gone again all without letting her know.
Andy had wanted to take Traci's advice and here 'Boyd's message' directly from Sam, but this just seemed to confirm it.
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Barn Thursday 7:45am
"Andy." Traci called out as she jumped out of the way of another officer who was leaving the locker room. "Andy wait up."
''Hey Trace."
''He's back."
"Who?" Andy asked confused for a second and just as Traci went to answer she realized who she'd been referring to. "Sam." They both said at the same time. "I know" Andy continued. "I went to his place last night."
''And.'"
"He wasn't there, I guess Boyd was telling the truth."
"There's a first time for everything." Traci mumbled as she opened the door to her own locker. "I still think you should talk to him."
"Well he told me he'd come for me, then he said he couldn't and now he is back and he hasn't called, he hasn't tried to find me." Andy paused and tried to control her reaction and level out the shaking in her voice. "I think I should just take the hint."
"You don't mean that."
"I ... we're gonna be late." Andy tried to put an end to the conversation.
''Andy."
"I don't want to talk about it." Andy waited the few seconds for Traci to catch up. "I just want to get today over with so I can get out of this uniform and spend the next two days at home."
"So you're back to hiding out."
"No." Andy's tone turned defensive. "I'm going to unpack."
"Is Swarek the reason you haven't unpacked? I really don't understand what is going on, first you don't want to leave his house and then you move back to my couch because of Boyd and to an apartment where you still sleep on the floor." Traci reached out and pulled Andy to a stop just outside the parade room. "I don't believe that someone who waited … who supports you the way Swarek does would just walk away from you. Not now that you're free and clear."
"I think I hurt him too many times. The truth is that he doesn't trust me and I can't blame him for that." Andy wiped under her eyes. "He probably thinks I'll just walk out on him again."
"Planning on joining us today?" Best asked as he walk pasted them.
"Yes sir."
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4:10pm
"Here." Andy held out the ice pack. "It should help."
"Thanks." Traci held the pack to her lower left arm.
"What happened?" Jerry asked as he pushed his way into the office.
"It's nothing." Traci used a calm, reassuring tone. "It's just a bruise."
"You've got to be careful."
"Jerry l was, the guy got hold of my arm and now he is down in booking."
"And you're up here with an icepack." He knelt down next to her, running his hand along her other arm. "I like you in one piece." Jerry leaned in and kissed her forehead.
Andy half coughed to remind them she was still in the room.
"Ok... yeah well I am going to go over and drop a file off to Boyd and then I am going to come back here and take you home." Jerry stood. "Will you be okay?"
"I'll go." Andy jumped in before Traci could answer. "If all you have to do is drop something off I'll do it and you can stay here with Traci."
"Guys I'm fine." Traci said to a room that seemed to have forgotten she was in it.
"Are you sure?" Jerry asked. "It's going to take you an hour to get there at this time."
''It's fine really, I don't have anywhere to be."
"The file is on my desk. The red one." Jerry turned back to Traci. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes." Traci nodded. "Everyone is overreacting."
"Still wait here and I'll go finish off a few things and then we can go home."
"I told the guys we'd go to the Penny."
"Yeah well it's going to take McNally an hour to get to Guns and Gangs, she'll have to wait around for half an hour to find out that Boyd's not there."
"You said you were going to see him?"
"No I said I was going to drop off a file. The whole unit is off until next Monday."
"What?"
"They always get time off after an undercover op. Most of them use it to spend time win family."
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"Hi I'm Officer McN-"
"Take a seat I'll get to you when I can." The desk Sargent said without looking up form his duty book.
"But-" This time Andy was cut of by a loosely raised hand pointing in the direction of the chains on the opposite side of the room.
Instead of dropping directly into a vacant chair Andy used her now free time to try and get a look at the squad room. She knew the building was home to Guns and Gangs, Vice and a taskforce that had been looking for a couple that had adducted and murdered three young boys. From what she could take in, it was hard to tell who was an officer and who had been arrested and brought in, in fact the only difference was the vice and Guns and Gangs guys had badges hanging from chains around their necks. Andy laughed to herself as she thought they did this so they could tell each other apart. A missing badge in that room may land you in a cell, which meant that the ones walking around in suits were probably from the taskforce. However as soon as she decided that she had to re-think it, a suited man was pulled up from a chair, his hands still cuffed behind him. Andy could only hear a little of what the suited man was yelling and it seemed he was trying to explain why he was paying for sex.
''McNally right?"
Andy was pulled away from the show as she turned to see who thought they knew her. "Yes." She said her voice a little unsure.
"Sargent Botti from vice, you 'helped' us out a few months ago."
"Sorry yes. How are you?" Andy was still a little focused on the fight the suited man was putting up.
"Research. He's a professor." Sargent Botti responded to Andy confused face. "It is either their first time or they're conducting research."
"Oh." Andy said not understanding what that meant.
"I swear every man in Toronto is a virgin conducting research." Sargent Botti glanced down to the thick file in Andy's hand. "Who are you here to see?"
"Detective Boyd, the Sargent told me to wait." Andy felt the need to explain.
"Well you'll be waiting till Monday, every one from the Ryan operation have the rest at the week off."
"Oh, okay well ..."
"You can leave that on his desk, it's the first desk in the second office on the right."
"Thanks." Andy smiled as the Sargent opened the door that lead into the squad room.
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"Well, look who's back mixing with the little people." Oliver clapped a hand on Sam's back. "Detective Swarek."
"Give it up." Sam said as he signalled the bartender.
Oliver slipped into the empty stool next to Sam. "It's good to have you back brother."
"It's good to be back."
"That looks nasty." Oliver tipped his glass toward Sam's face.
"Don't you start, I've had Sarah at me about taking care of myself."
"You've been in St Catherine's?"
"Yeah, thought I'd stop in to see everyone before I went home." Sam scanned the half empty bar.
"She's not here."
"Who?" Sam raised his eyebrows and shock his head, his face blank.
"You know who, I've only seen her here once since she came back."
"Oh." Sam didn't say any more as he downed the rest of his scotch before standing and pulling a few bills from his wallet to dropped them onto the counter.
"She volunteered to run a file over to Boyd." Oliver paused as he watched Sam all but freeze. "I am guessing she was looking for you." Again he waited and Sam still seemed fixed to the spot. "Maybe you should just go see her."
"She doesn't want to see me."
"Really? Who told you that?"
"Boyd." Sam almost choked as he said the name, he knew better than most that you couldn't put stock in anything that came out of that mans mouth.
"Right, is that the same Boyd that said he'd move in as soon as he had enough or was Boyd that was going to move if the girls were moved or separated?"
Sam knew he was never going to be able to forgive Boyd, by the time he'd sent officers back to the warehouse some had already been moved. They still didn't know where three of them were.
"I don't know where she is living, if she'd wanted to see me she would have left a note, a message or something."
"You ever think that Boyd told her the same thing?" This time it was Oliver that raised his eyebrows. "No. Well maybe if you had, you wouldn't be hanging out in bars and she wouldn't be driving half way across town."
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It was hot, the first real hot day they had and she wasn't sure just how it had gone from the chilling rain a few nights ago to the steaming heat she felt now. Thanks to the change in weather it seemed to take her forever to cover the few miles form her new apartment to his house.
But now she was here Andy found herself fixed to the spot in front of his door, nervously she twisted the end of her ponytail in one hand as she listen to the banging that was coming from the upper level. That meant he was home but her hand stilled in the ends of her hair and didn't seem to want to let go of it.
"This is ridiculous." Andy shook herself; let go of her hair and banged on his door to counter the noised coming from inside. She tried to suppress the rising tension and without warning the voice in her head took over and she turned to walk away only to hear the door open and it was followed by a familiar gruff tone.
"Yeah."
As Andy turned she saw that Sam hadn't even lifted his head to see who was at his door. "Oh... l" Andy was more taken back to find him shirtless in front
of her, sweat shimmering across chest and down his arms. She tried to focus on his face but her eyes were drawn to his right hand that was wrapped in a towel that he was currently running down his left arm in an effort to wipe the mixture of dust a sweat away.
"Andy?"
Her name hung in the air as she focused on the towel that was working its way around his body. She'd seen him do so many things and right now as he was, in his house she realized he looked at home. For the first time she saw just Sam and at that moment the stunned tone of his voice registered with her.
"Andy." This time he controlled his voice and stepped back. "You coming in?" Sam turned leaving the door open as he started up the stairs, once at the top he grabbed a light grey shirt that hung over railing and slipped it over his head.
Andy pushed the door closed and again she stopped at the bottom of the steps, it only took her a moment to ready herself. Once she reached the top of the staircase Andy found herself fidgeting and looking for the best place to stand. What should she do with herself, where should she stand? It wasn't an uncommon feeling for Andy, but it was around Sam. The thing that had always drawn her to him, right from the start was how calm he made her feel, the confidence he placed in her, seemingly without question.
"Here" Sam handed her a hammer and walked into the bedroom, picking up a larger hammer as he went. "It'll make you feel better." A familiar grin lit his face.
Andy watched him as he went to work on the wall, his biceps flexing with each stroke. Sam was as focused on this as she'd ever seen him. "Why do you need to make yourself feel better?" Andy looked around the room, whole sections of the wall were missing. Shattered pieces of it littered the floor.
"I'm mad."
"At what, the wall?" Andy let out a nervous laugh.
"No." Sam smashed his hammer into previously untouched section of wall.
"Then what?"
"Who."
"Okay. Who?" Andy waited for a moment. "Me I guess."
"Nope." Again he hit a section of the wall. "At myself"
"Okay, What'd you do?" Andy said only this time he hit the wall with enough force that she jumped back a little.
"You're right though, I should be mad at you." He agreed as the hammer fell loose in his hand and dropped his head shacking it a little.
"You should be mad at me." Andy stepped forward sounding more than a little offended.
"Yes! ... You show up at my house; again … and I let you in; again and for what?" This time it was Sam that stepped toward Andy. "Every time I let you in you walk away."
"I walk away. You're the one that sent Boyd to 'let me down easy'."
"I sent Boyd." Sam's words came out as if he was talking to himself.
"I don't even know why I came." Andy dumped the hammer back into open toolbox and paused long enough for Sam to stop her if he wanted to. "Fine" Andy turned and started down the steps.
"Andy." Sam lifted his head, ''McNally wait." He called jogging down the steps to grab her arm and stopped her just short of his front door. "Wait." He repeated. "I didn't send Boyd."
"What?"
"Boyd. I asked him to say sorry." Andy dropped her head as Sam spoke. "No." He said as he released her arm only to use he's hand to left her head. "I wanted him to tell you I was sorry that this was going to take longer then I wanted."
"Why didn't you come see me? Why didn't you call me?"
"It doesn't matter." Sam moved another step closer to her, pushing Andy into the wall. "You're here now." His voice was rough as he placed a hand either side of her head trapping her in place.
"I -"
"Shhh." Sam dipped his head, his mouth just inches from hers. "I don't want to talk right now." With that he brushed his lips across hers; paused and closed in covering her mouth with his, his hands found their way from the wall to her waist. "Right now." He released her mouth just as quickly as he had taken it. "I'm thinking about that date I promised you."
"It's ten in the morning?" Nothing that was running through Andy's head made any sense to her, something that wasn't being helped by her current position. She'd come for answers and just as she remembered that Sam pushed her hard into the wall and in turn she found herself flush against him. Her chest pressing into his with each breath.
"That means we've got all day," was Sam whispered reply his eyes fixed on hers, his hands gripping her waist and his body firmly pressed into her however he was completely still, completely focused on her. It was a minute before Sam spoke again, "Andy, I swore to myself that if I ever got the chance to be with you it wouldn't be in hotel room or sneaking around trying to make sure that no one saw us." Andy watched as Sam's face changed to one of confidence and he flashed his trademark smile. "I wanted it to be somewhere that we could return to … y'know … if you wanted too." Raising his hand and brushing some hair away from her face, his hand lingered softly on her face as he slowly glided his fingers over her cheek. Andy leaned her head toward his hand, softly forcing her face into his hand making it possible for him to guide her into his kiss.
As they kissed, Andy let her weight fall onto him and hesitantly at first her hands wrapped around his back, her finger playing with the hem of his shirt. "Sam?" The questioning concern tone suddenly returned to her voice.
Pulling back so their foreheads were touching, "I was thinking about taking a shower."
"Okay." This time, for the first time today Andy kissed Sam, pushing her hand under his shirt and let her fingers fan across his lower back.
Without warning Sam bent his knees and wrapped one arm under Andy's ass and lifted her up and used his other hand to guide her legs around his waist. "You wanna come?"
"Okay." Andy almost sounded as if she hadn't even heard the question but was willing to agree to anything.
As he stood Sam turn his head slightly to allow Andy better access to his neck as he carried her through his bedroom and into the bathroom. Sam placed Andy down onto the counter and allowed her to pull his shirt over his head, watching as she dropped it carelessly onto the floor her eyes never leaving his. He just there he stood, waiting. It wasn't even close to the first time she had seen him without his shirt, in fact she had seen him all but naked and she wasn't even sure if he knew her name back then. The difference now was that she cared and wanted to wait as long as he wanted and rush in all at the same time.
Reaching out with her hand, Andy touched the lower part of his stomach, winding her fingers into the wisps of hair trailing down from his belly button and disappearing into his pants. Placing a hand on each of his hips, Andy slowly pulled herself forward so she could again lock her legs around his waist.
Face to face, Sam lifted his hands up to frame her face and he seemed to square himself as he did. Completely still he brushed the loose strands of hair away from her face and then he let one hand wind its way around to the clip that was holding it in a lose ponytail. With one click he pulled the clip out of Andy's hair letting it fall free. "I like it out." He wound his hands into it as he pulled her in for a passionate kiss.
Running her hands around his neck, she let her fingers trail down his back, before quickly moving her hands back around to his chest, then his arms and back to his neck. She seemed to want to explore as much of him as she could. Breaking away from his kiss, Andy started to kiss her way down his neck, licking and kissing her way to his right nipple. Softly biting it, he felt himself shiver with every move her mouth made.
"Ohh Andy," Sam ducked his head down capturing her mouth in his, sliding his hands down her over the soft swell of her breasts before gathering fist fulls of her shirt and discarded it in one movement. "God," Sam whispered as one of his hands hovered just above her breast, gradually he moved his hand closer, running one finger along the edge of the lace that lined the top of her bra. He leaned in and kissed her softly, Sam had always imaged what was happening now would be quick, furious and wanton. He thought that he liked this speed much better, slow, sure and special as his fingers lightly dancing across the small of her back.
He broke away from the kiss and once again picked her up her legs still wrapped around his waist, only this time he knew that Andy would be able to feel the reaction to her kiss pressed firmly against her inner thigh. With Andy's arms wrapped around his neck the shower was all but forgotten and Sam transferred them from the bathroom and gently laid her onto the bed.
Andy dug her nails into his back causing him to let out another groan.
~xXx~xXx~xXx~xXx~xXx~xXx~
How the morning had changed. Andy was still smiling as she waited in the truck for Sam to take her to an unknown destination. She'd wanted to yell at him, to tell him she'd never have picked him for a coward; sending messages via Boyd like a scared school boy. Now instead they were gong on a date.
"What's that?"
Sam smiled as he dropped the bag onto the footwell behind the drivers seat. "You'll see."
She didn't want to admit it but she loved not knowing where they were going or what would happen once they arrived. He'd managed to get her into his truck with only half an explanation and the rest of time she'd been drumming the armrest. "So, where are you taking me?" Andy asked once the waiting got the better of her.
"You'll see." He guided her hand to its resting place under his on his leg, where it stayed as he drove for almost an hour in confortable silence.
"Where are we?" Andy asked as Sam pulled his truck to a stop under the shade of a large Cedar tree at the end of a fire trail.
"The other side of Sheldon look out." Sam opened his door and walked around the front at his truck to her door, opening it he held out his arm to help her down. "Are you trying to tell me no pimply 16 year boy brought you up here?"
"My Dad was a cop, boys tended to stay away." Andy smiled. "Did you bring girls up here?"
"No. After Dad and Gillian I would come up here to get away from everything." Sam returned to the back of his truck and left her looking over the city, "Here." Sam had spread a blanket onto the hood of his truck and without warning Sam lifted Andy onto it before he used the bumper to push himself up. "I could spend hours out here." He said as he laid back, watching as the sunlight played on the leaves and left a dappled pattern on them. "It's like everything was okay." Sam dropped his eyes to Andy's back. He guessed that she was focused on the city skyline, her hands repeatedly stroking one piece of hair.
"I can't believe we're this close to the city."
"Sarah has a photo of the lights from here. I think it was one of the first ones she took."
"It is hard to ever imagine little Sam … I guess you had to grow up fast."
"No. Sarah had to, she would try so hard when we were kids ... we're lucky now."
"How... I ..."
"She has a family." Sam answered Andy's confused tone. "Think about what we see every day. Sarah could have been anyone of them." Sam wanted to stop talking; well he wanted to talk it was the reason he'd brought her up here.
"Andy." Sam said resisting the urge to pull her back to him and made himself slow his voice to ensure that he could control his emotions. "If you want after this I can take you home, come Monday I go to Guns and Gangs and you go back to the fifteenth, you would barely ever see me if that is the way you wanted it."
"No." Andy answered almost before he had finished.
"Okay." Sam reached out and placed a hand in the center of her back and he noticed her head fall, it seemed that she was now focused on his legs that were stretched out next to her. He was glad she couldn't see him when he next opened his mouth only to close it again, then he bit his bottom lip as he gently started to caress her lower back. When she didn't pull away he decided to continue. "You know I want this, I've wanted whatever this is for a long time."
"Sam." Andy's voice was soft, a little shaky and cut off by a press of his hand.
"This is not pretend anymore, we're in the real world now. We are who we are and I know you haven't long ... I know you may not want what I do and that's okay." Sam looked away for the first time, and composed himself again before he returned his eyes to her back, thankful that she couldn't see him. "I can wait … I can wait till you're ready … but … If you're never gonna be ready, that's okay but I need to know. I c -"
"I'm not walking away." Andy cut him off her voice firm and she finally turned enough to face him.
"'Are you sure?" Sam pulled himself back up so they were now facing each other for the first time since they arrived here. "Because I don't want to go back."
"Me neither." Andy leaned in, placing a hand on Sam's cheek before letting her lips settle on his other cheek. "I'm right where I want to be."
"Okay." Sam covered her hand with his, turned his head into it and placed a soft kiss in the center of her palm. He used that hold on her to pull them both back down onto the hood. "Everything else we can sort out later."
"This is nice." Andy said in reply after a long minute. Her head nested into crook of Sam's arm, his hand slipped under her shirt lazily drawing patterns on her back.
~xXx~xXx~xXx-xXx~xXx~xXx~
Thanks for reading, and again I would like to thank everyone for the feedback and messages that were sent. I have an epilogue mostly written however work and life has gotten in the way (the reason this has taken so long). For now I will mark this as completed and I do hope to get back to it asap, however I am moving states on short notice.