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Chapter 15 – Avalanche
An animal attack: that was how the local paper described the grisly scene at the Henderson home. The coroners were baffled at how one woman seemed to have been bitten, while her servant had a broken neck. They weren't certain how to characterize the death as; murder or accident. With no evidence as to what happened, the case was quickly forgotten. All that remained was the shocked look on the face of the late woman's daughter, who to the world was missing and suspected dead.
Bella's mind was processing the words on the newspaper in front of her. Renee was dead. Surprisingly, what shocked her the most was that she hardly felt saddened, it was unfortunate yes, but she could not bring herself to care. She would never have wished this upon her, and certainly Renee had done many awful things, but death seemed like a rather extreme punishment.
She put the offensive paper down and looked at her breakfast. After reading the descriptive articles, and the bouts of sickness she had been having frequently, hunger was the farthest thing from her mind.
"Dear, everythin' all right?" her head turned in Anne's direction.
She handed Anne the paper, where the headline read Found Dead in Home.
"Oh my," she covered her mouth in shock.
"Indeed, is it wrong that I feel sorry for her but I'm not grief-stricken?" Bella asked, worried about her reaction to the death of the woman who birthed her.
"Sweetheart, it's understandable that you would feel that way, she put you through so much…"
"But she did not deserve to die!" Bella interrupted.
"No, she did not deserve this, but life isn't always fair. I'm sure it was her time, and you can't stop that," Anne tried to calm Bella.
"Bella, I really don't know what else could calm you darlin', but this anxiety can't be good for the baby so please try to relax. Would you like some tea for breakfast instead?"
"Tea would be wonderful, thank you," Bella replied knowing the older woman was right, stress wasn't good.
"You certainly don't look like you can keep anythin' down. Are you feelin' all right?"
"Just a bit nauseous," Bella said, her face turning paler by the second.
She had been ill quite a bit lately; the pregnancy had taken its toll on her. Meals had to be carefully prepared, to not aggravate her stomach more so than it already was. Fatigue was a constant and as much as she hated to be sluggish, the majority of Bella's time was spent taking naps at intervals during the day.
~*~
Bella slowly recuperated from the loss of her mother, and though she didn't grieve, there was an underlining sadness to her. Losing ones mother emotionally was one thing, and she had come to terms with that reality. Yet losing a mother physically, with no possibility of ever seeing her again was not something she had ever wished upon the cruel woman.
Good days were spent with Anne in the garden or reading in the library. She had come to realize that Jasper had not been joking about their library. It was extensive, books on almost any subject she desired, and when confined to the house like she was, books were the perfect way to slip away.
~*~
March became a particularly dreary month, as more news of fallen soldiers reached nearby towns and homes. Spring storms made their presence known weekly, the grass turned greener and Anne's gardens thrived with flowers in bloom and vegetables starting to sprout.
It was the time when nature, though dreary and wet, sometimes brought forth new life. Letters from Jasper had somewhat ceased, and while Bella worried she tried to maintain a calm demeanor. She had learned that worrying aggravated her to the point where she had even experienced pains. Anne had to immediately send for their family doctor, both women fearing something went amiss with the child.
The man, Doctor Hiram Georges, was a trustworthy doctor to the Whitlocks and when Anne learned of the young girls pregnancy it was he who had taken over Bella's care. After examining Bella, he had come to the conclusion that the fetus was very much still alive. He informed both women that there was no need to worry, but that Bella was in need of rest and advised that she find ways to remain calm, that her own stress could have attributed for the slight pains.
From then on Bella had made it her goal to remain emotionally calm. Even when all she wanted to do was panic, she would not put the baby in unnecessary jeopardy.
~*~
Before long, April was upon them, and Bella's sickness had completely left her. Jasper had written back, the news of his impending fatherhood brought forth a new joy in his writing. He worried and in the course of one letter asked as many questions as he could, how she was feeling, and if she was being careful. There was the underlying regret for not being there, but Bella had attempted her best at letting him know every detail that was allowed.
So on and so forth, the letters passed through May until Jasper announced that he was being moved again and would not know when he would be able to respond.
~*~
June was extremely difficult, the spring storms were forgotten as blistering Texas heat took over. Bella's protruding stomach was quickly making itself known. Anne had begun to look discretely into buying materials to have one of the farms personal workers, make the baby's furniture.
Bella had asked for the baby to be placed with her, but Anne knew the realities of motherhood and had slowly been preparing a separate room for the infant. Though it was separate, the room was just across the hall from Bella's, for her comfort and convenience.
James had disappeared from the town; no one had seen him in a public setting since the engagement party for the wedding that never happened. He became the town mystery when his house was sold; the interior of the home was empty and dirty, almost as if the bachelor hadn't inhabited it.
~*~
July, August, and September were much the same. Temperatures rose to degrees that dresses were at times unbearable. Bella's appearance was that of someone close to full term. No dress could disguise the sphere that projected outwards from her midsection. She was advised to take daily walks, and light exercise to help during childbirth.
Due to Anne's strict diet of fresh fruits and vegetables, Bella had formed great friendships with the kitchen staff, in order to get more of the food she desired. Not wanting to be chastised by the lady of the house, they would relent but only to an extent.
One discovery that had Bella gazing at her stomach more often than not was during July. An ordinary day of reading aloud, something she had taken to doing, as she imagined reading to her unborn infant. She was reading through Wuthering Heights by a man named Ellis Bell, she found it riveting, the pettiness and suffering behind the lovers was addictive.
Suddenly, a jerky movement startled her, making her drop her book. She paused unsure of where the movement had come from and after a few second nothing happened. Picking up her book she continued to read where she had been interrupted. Not more than a few minutes passed before she felt the movement again, this time her hand flew to her stomach. At the point where her hand touched her stomach, she felt a thump, then a few seconds' later two more.
A smile spread across as she realized it was her child's way of letting her know they were there.
"Hello to you, too, little one," laughter clear in her voice.
Awe and insurmountable love filled her when, at the sound of her voice, two more thumps came against her hand.
With the widest smile she'd had in months, Bella walked as fast as her stomach would allow in search of Anne.
She found her in her sitting room answering correspondence; Anne raised her head worriedly at the sound of the frantic footsteps.
"Dear, is everything alright?" she stood seeing the girl's flushed cheeks and heavy breath.
"Great, perfect, absolutely fantastic! Here feel?" Bella took her hand and placed over her stomach.
It took longer than she expected, but again there were two thumps where Anne's hand was positioned.
"My, isn't he an active little fella?" she cooed, in awe as well.
"Startled me half to death while I was reading just a moment ago," Bella said gently, rubbing her belly, soothing the active child.
The moment suddenly turned bittersweet as she realized Anne wasn't the person she wanted to run off and share this news with. He should be here, holding her, experiencing these small, yet important parts of having a child. A wonderful moment such as this shouldn't have been spent wondering whether your intended was safe.
After that, she cherished every movement and new experience twice as much, for herself and for Jasper.
~*~
Jasper was having a meeting with his superiors. They were training him, bettering him in order for him to rise to a more substantial position. He had been in battle more often than those in his platoon. Making him one of the best, for he had survived more than most up to that point.
Though no one noticed, or truly cared, Jasper's heart was slowly hardening with each battle, as friends he had made were killed one after the other.
He divorced himself from connections; the moment Silas the brute was blown away by enemy fire. There was nothing anyone could do; the bastards had taken them by surprise in their own campsite.
Jasper trained harder, his brain worked faster than those around him. Most of the men in his infantry unit owed their lives to the young man - the young man who would rather be lying in bed with his future wife and mother to his child, awaiting the arrival of said child. Instead it was nearly midnight, the sky at its darkest and he was planning their next offensive attack on a nearby Yankee camp, and how many men they could take down in the attack.
~*~
October had arrived faster than Bella would have liked. The baby's furniture had been placed in the separate room, and everyone on the plantation was at the ready for the arrival.
Bella was barely able to move on her own, due to her ever burgeoning middle. She and Anne had taken to making clothes for the baby, instead of spending copious amounts of money on already made infant dressings. They had made a few pieces and would finish even more after the birth. Lately that was all Bella was allowed to do, slowly but surely she was being driven to insanity. She was required to have an escort at all times around the plantation, leaving her feeling suffocated.
Although, she loved the connection of child and mother during pregnancy, the lack of freedom had her praying for a prompt delivery.
Knitting needles clinked as they were fast at work, creating a lace hem for an infant chemise. Bella's hands going at a slower pace as her back had been especially uncomfortable today. A ball of yarn slowly fell of the side of her chair. Anne noticed and bent to pick it up but Bella stop her.
"It is alright Anne, there's no need, I can get it myself."
Bella hated that everyone felt the need to do the things she thought she was capable of doing herself. She laid her needles aside, to retrieve the twine, but in the process of bending over a fierce pain gripped her lower back.
Anne had not returned to her task, and went into action immediately as the look of pain crossed Bella's face. Then the earsplitting scream resounded across the house. This was the alarm everyone had been expecting, the tell tale sign that new life was about to grace the world.
Her right arm went behind Bella's back, as her left clutched at the screaming girl's hand.
"Come on dear, we have to get you to lay down while someone calls for the doctor," Anne tried to coax Bella to stand from her kneeling position on the floor.
Bella could have never described the awful pain that pierced her the moment she bent to pick up the twine. As badly as she wanted to move, which she new she should, the pain was too great. Her breathing was strained, she could feel her lungs burning from holding in the air she needed to survive, but still all she could focus on was the pain.
It took three women to finally lift her off the ground, and into a bedroom prepared on the first floor for this occasion.
"Rosa, send for the doctor, and please hurry!" Anne rushed as she gave orders to the other maids in the room.
Bella was stripped down to her thin chemise, and laid on top of the white sheets. In the time it took for the doctor to arrive, Bella's womb had released the liquid it held, and her bouts of pain had increased.
Three hours it took for Hiram to arrive, and after a brief examination, he deemed Bella was midway through her delivery.
~*~
Seconds turned to minutes and minutes turned to hours, sweat beaded Bella's forehead from the strain. The housemaids worked round her, mopping her forehead and cooling her overheated body. Anne rarely left her side, as she encouraged her breathing and Hiram spent his time preparing for the actual birth.
Ten hours after this all had started Dr. Georges deemed Bella ready to deliver.
"Now Miss Swan I'm going to need you to push, but only when I allow you, and please breathe, it will do your child no good if you keep holding your breath," the doctor said as he positioned himself at Bella's covered lower half.
Anne and Rosa remained inside the room as the maids scurried away to wait for the arrival of a new member to the family.
"At the next pain, you will exert all your force into the push, is that clear?"
Bella weakly nodded just before another blistering pain hit, far worse than any other. A scream ripped through her again as she put forth as much force as she could muster. The doctor's hands where under the blanket laying on her lower half as he watched her face for lack of breathing.
Anne rubbed her back gently, as she whispered words of encouragement into her ear. Tears streamed down Bella's face. Rosa worked fast to help the doctor as well as Bella when her head needed to be wiped.
Two more pains, and two large pushes later Bella was giving up. The exhaustion was clear in her face, with her red cheeks and teary eyes.
"Come sweetheart just a little more and that critter will be here in your arms," Anne attempted to coax her.
"No… ugnn…It hu-hurts too m-much… I can't," Bella sobbed.
In that moment all that she wanted was for Jasper to be here holding her just as Anne was. To tell her she could do it, for their child to join them, and meet them both together. On the next pain she held on and didn't exert any force refusing to deliver a child into a broken life.
"Isabella, you cannot do this, your child is in risk of dying we have to deliver now!" Hiram almost yelled as he scolded her.
"Hiram please allow me, your attitude is not helpin' her. Can you not see how torn she is?" Anne said.
"Now Bella dear, please, I know it's hard darlin' n' you're right, it hurts, but that baby deserves a life, Jasper wouldn't want you to do this. Come on sweetheart, when you see that little angel's face nothin' else will ever matter more but you got to push…"
"I want Jasper, I can't do this without him." Bella cried.
"Yes you can Mija, Jasper would not like you to think this way, no te preocupes he will be back, but he will want to see this criatura," Rosa interrupted them as she went back to help Bella.
The sweet mother and housekeeper stood on either side of Bella and helped her sit up as pain gripped through her once more. Yet, this time she found the strength within herself to push with all her might. They were both right and she knew as she felt herself being ripped open at the seams, that even though Jasper was not here physically, he was emotionally from his letters.
Suddenly the pressure that had been straining her for the last ten hours disappeared, and behind was left a dull ache. Small cries filled the room as Hiram did all the necessary checks and cuts, and handed the infant to Rosa where she had a basin of water to clean the child.
Several minutes later, a drained Bella looked up with heavy lidded eyes at the bundle being handed to her. When she looked at the head of blonde curls and rosy cheeks she couldn't help but be mesmerized. This was her baby, hers and Jasper's child, happy tears streamed down her face as she bent to kiss the little forehead.
"Hi darling, I'm your momma!"
A/N: I know I'm evil! You don't even know what the baby is! In al fairness I just really couldn't resist to make you wait just a little bit longer for you to find that little bit of info. I haven't done a propper cliffie yet so this was my half assed one! LOL Not much to say about this chapter exept its mostly fluff on the pregnancy and that we are now in October of 1863 don't forget what time we are living in! Cause you have to remind me I tend to forget HAHa! Ok done with my psycho babbling, R&R! Give me something sweet for good luck on tomorrow's exam! Review! I love you all you make me so happy everytime my inbox pings! You broke another record guys be super happy which is why I rewarded you with this chap!! *muah* Love you all my wonderful readers! And remember the Indie Twific Awards go nominate before time runs out!
xx
Nani