Chapter 7

Michael and Fiona were asleep, curled up in Ian and Leesa's bed. The bedroom was on the west side of the house, so the morning sun didn't bother them. Sam and Jesse took up Jackie's bed, and their hosts sat up talking while David, Rick, Tony, and Jackie all crashed in the last bed and on the floor. Eventually, Leesa succumbed as well, but Ian was too worried about the two injured men to sleep, and every now and then he checked on them. He was an actor, not a doctor, but what little he did know told him that they should really be in a hospital. Michael was adamant that they stay put, and after he broke down and told them everything, Ian couldn't blame him. If the whole tale was true. It was like listening to a real live version of Burned, and the really crazy thing about it was that the characters they played on TV were in his home, authentic, flesh and blood. The actors bore an uncanny resemblance to the real Michael, Fiona, Sam, and Jesse, which made it all the more surreal. It was almost like looking in the mirror.

Ian heard footsteps moving laboriously down the stairs. He slowly turned, trying not to wake Leesa, whose head lay in his lap, her body taking up two thirds of the length of the couch.

"Sam. You're awake!" Ian spoke softly. It was pretty strange to be talking to himself, sort of.

"Do I know you?" With an expression that communicated his disorientation, Sam glanced around the room, and as he reached the bottom of the staircase, he stared at the man who spoke to him. "Where are we?"

With one hand, Ian scooped Leesa's head off his lap, slipped off the couch, and let her fall gently onto the cushion. He placed his cold cup of tea on the coffee table and approached the real life spy with a gentle smile meant to put Sam at ease. "You're in my home." He slowly stuck out his hand. "My name's Ian Benton. I'm an actor."

"Sam Axe."

"Yeah, I know." Ian grinned. "You're not gonna believe this, but..."

"How'd we wind up here? Are we anywhere near Seattle?"

"Nope. You're not far from Medford, Oregon. It's a little town in the southern part of the state. Your plane crashed..."

"Michael...Fi..."

"They're okay. They're asleep in our bed. Was Jesse awake when you got up?"

"No. I thought he was sleeping." Sam stretched and looked around the small living room. "Nice place, real cozy but kinda... normal. For an actor, you sure don't live the pretentious lifestyle."

Ian shrugged. "Nah, when you live long enough trying to make ends meet, and you finally get that big paycheck, you've learned to live without a lot of stuff. It's simpler that way, and that's kind of why we moved out here. Away from Hollyweird and all the madness. The fans can't find me, and it's quiet. I love it."

"Except for the planes dropping out of the sky." Sam replied with a smile. "Sounds like you've got it made. I could go for a place like this, except in Miami."

"You remember what happened." Ian's expression lightened.

"Yeah."

"Hey, you want some coffee or something?"

"Thanks, that'd be nice." Sam took a chair at the tiny round table in the small kitchen and waited for Ian to pour him a cup of coffee.

"Michael told us about who you guys are." Ian placed the cup in front of him, set the tea kettle on to boil, and laid his own cup on the counter before sitting down across from Sam. "You wanna know what's really funny? We play you guys on TV! How weird is that?"

Sam cocked his head and stared at him. "What?"

"Yeah, we're all on this show called Burned, Rick, Tony, Jackie, and me."

"Who do you play? Don't tell me they cast you as Mike."

"Heck no!" Ian laughed. "I play...you."

Studying him intently for a few seconds, Sam responded, "There's a slight, and I mean really slight, resemblance between you and me."

"I hope that means I'm better looking," Ian joked.

"Yeah, you wish." Sam took a sip from his cup, savored the flavor, and swallowed. "That's some good coffee."

"It's organic. Makes a huge difference, at least that's what my wife says. I'm more of a tea drinker." Ian stood, rinsed his cup in the sink, and prepared a tea ball for seeping. "Now this, this is something you've gotta try if you like tea. It's our own blend."

"No thanks, this'll do just fine." Sam took a longer swallow and held the cup in both hands. "So, now that we're here, what do we do?"

Ian shrugged and returned to the table, bobbing the tea ball in his cup. "I think the first priority is getting Jesse up and around. Fiona seems to be okay, just a bruise. Michael probably has a concussion, but not unlike the character that Rick plays, he's too stubborn to let us take anyone to the hospital for a checkup." He let out a deep breath. "Look, I can make some calls. I know somebody who'd be willing to make a house call and keep things on the down low."

"That would be great, 'cause I don't think this happened by accident, and the less attention we get, the better off we are."

Ian stared at him. "That's what Fiona said last night. Do you have any idea who could have caused the plane to crash?"

Sam shook his head and immediately regretted it. He clamped a hand against the side of his head and groaned. Then he grumbled, "This is worse than a hangover."

Ian pulled the aspirin out of a cupboard and set it in front of him. "Looks like we'll be using a lot of this around here for awhile."

Once Sam felt more alive, he went to check on Jesse. Ian hung back, watching from the door as Sam perched on the edge of the bed and spoke to the unconscious man. He didn't respond, so Sam patted him lightly on the cheek. That got a muffled groan out of him, so Sam tapped harder. Jesse's eyes slowly opened.

"Hey man, you don't have to go beatin' me up. I'm awake! Jeez!" He groaned again and rolled to his side. "I feel like I went ten rounds, man. Every part of me aches."

Sam glanced at Ian with a small smile on his face, and returned his attention to Jesse. "We were just getting worried about you, Jess. You've been out all night."

"No, I got up during the night to take a leak. I'm good. Really."

"Is that what that gash on your arm is telling you?" He bypassed the bandage on Jesse's bicep and placed a hand on his friend's forehead. "You're a little warm."

"I'm covered up like an Eskimo, of course I'm gonna be warm!" He threw aside the covers and snuck off the bed on the opposite side. "Jeez, Sam, you sound like my mama or something! I'm fine!" He stumbled, but Ian was there to help steady him with a hand on his good arm. "Hey, who's this guy?"

"He's me, sort of." Sam grinned mischievously, as Jesse divided his attention between him and Ian. They could see the resemblance made him think he must have taken a good blow to the head. "He's an actor on a show that depicts us. Yeah, some guy named Tony plays you, Rick plays Michael, and Jackie plays Fiona. That's about right, isn't it, Ian?"

"Yeah. Isn't that a trip?"

Jesse's eyebrows knit together as he studied Ian. "Yeah, he's like...wow...you guys could be twins or something. He's better looking, but hey, he's an actor. They're supposed to look good."

Sam scowled, taking offense at Jesse's words. "Hey, I can look good. Take Chuck Finley for example."

Ian's head whipped around. "Chuck...Finley? You have a Chuck Finley alias too?"

Sam's eyebrow quirked up. "Yeah. What of it?"

"I...we...use that alias on the show."

Sam whistled and said, "This is getting weirder by the minute!"

"You're telling me," Jesse exclaimed. "I can wake up any time now."

"I've been thinking that since my first cup of joe, and it hasn't worked yet." Sam gave Jesse a smirk. "Let's face it Jess, we're not in Kansas anymore."