There wasn't much to tell. Mycroft relayed what had happened over the last few weeks, most importantly the disappearing ties, the broken umbrellas and the weight gain.

As a Holmes, Sherlock understood the gravity of the situation. Not a Holmes, John tried not to laugh at how upset Mycroft was.

Apparently both Holmes brothers were too dramatic for their own good.

"I'll see what I can do." Sherlock said, when Mycroft was done. "It may take a bit, as whoever is responsible has done a very good job infiltrating."

Mycroft blanched. "How long?"

Sherlock thought a moment. "Probably a week at most."

"How am I going to survive?" Mycroft asked in horror. "I'll be ten pounds heavier and have no umbrellas left."

Sherlock sighed. "I know. But it's imperative that you stick this out. Pretend the perpetrator is succeeding."

"What if he is?"

Sherlock shrugged. "I always thought you were stronger than that. I have trouble believing that you're really as lost as you pretend to be."

Mycroft got up from his chair and made ready to leave. "Fine."

The door to the flat clicked shut.

Sherlock laid back in his chair, eyes closed and a faint smile playing on his face.

"Do you have any ideas?" John asked him.

Sherlock opened one eye. "Quite obviously. I have it all figured out. I received a message a day ago. It's on the mantle if you'd care to read it."

John got up to look at the mantle. "What did it say?"

"I haven't the faintest." Sherlock said, surprised. "I haven't read it yet, if that's what you think."

John found the unopened envelope and brought it back to his chair. "Why not? Didn't you think it would be useful?"

Sherlock's eyes opened a crack. " I was busy. I asked Mrs. Hudson to just put it on the mantle for me."

John sighed. "And because you were too lazy to walk two paces and get it to read."

Sherlock's eyes darted away. "Noo. I was busy."

"Right." The letter open, John read it aloud. "My dear Sherlock. I have been thinking of you often recently, and was wondering if you would oblige me for tea on the-"

Sherlock snatched the paper out of John's hands.

"Not that one idiot." Sherlock stuffed the letter in question into his jacket. "It'll obviously pertain to the case. And that one was open. Try to use your brain."

John rolled his eyes and reached for the other envelope.

"Never mind." Sherlock swatted his hand out of the way. "I'll get it."

Sherlock's slender fingers broke the small seal on the envelope as John collapsed on his chair.

John watched Sherlock's eyes dart back and forth across the paper, reading at a seemingly impossible rate.

"Yes." Sherlock confirmed, a minute later. "This is exactly what we need."

"Well, give it here." John reached out for the piece of paper.

I suppose your brother has been over. Quite a fall from his usual, you must agree. But I do suppose that what he's been going through the past few days has been quite traumatic. You are going to help him, right? We all know he's helped you out too many times to count.

Well, when you decide to get on it, come find me at the college. I trust you know who I am.

Oh, and bring John. It'll be nice to see you two together.

"Who the hell is this person?" John asked.

Sherlock pulled on his coat. "You don't need to know."

"Of course not." John got to his feet. "Because my intelligence is average."

Sherlock grinned as he tied his scarf. "Indeed. Come on!"

A/N

Well, I'm not dead luckily. Here I am updating cuz I'm bored of my NaNo. *smirk*

Only 14000 words left to write.

Anyway, expect tons more updates to all my fics this December. Prolly around twice a week to make up for November.

Thanks for not killing me! Next chappie of this'll be up in an hour or two.