Secret Love Can Kill
Sorry again for the wait. Well here it is!
Disclaimer: I do not, nor have I ever owned Harry Potter.
Draco POV:
I was having a horrible nightmare. Harry was looking at me, crying. I ran over to him, trying to make him feel better. All of his friends sprang up out of no where.
Each hit me with a different hex. I didn't hear them all. My eyes were only for the green eyed man in front of me.
He had looked up at me in wonder. I looked into his emerald orbs, and saw myself.
Then the jinxes, and curses, and hexes hit me,
I fell to the floor, and my body was uncontrollably thrashing about.
But whenever I closed my eyes, I still saw Harry. He muttered something and it stopped.
I said "Damn Potter." He just looked at me again.
The dream faded away, as Harry walked closer to me. Stretching out his hand, he almost touched me- then I woke up.
Harry was sleeping soundly, with a smile on his face. He should be. The guy deserves it, after the war. If only he were gay...
No. I need to stop right there, it isn't like a Malfoy to deal with what ifs, only will bes.
Then again, it's also not like a Malfoy to fall in love with Harry Potter.
I saw Harry begin to stir, and he sighed. When his eyes opened, I quickly looked away. That's when I noticed Pomfrey coming over.
Harry POV:
I honestly didn't want to wake up. I was having a great dream, including myself, Draco, both of us deeply in love, and three days alone in the Room of Requirement. So, you'll just have to imagine beyond that.
I sighed when the dream left, as I tried to recall it. When I opened my eyes, I saw Draco looking at me. Though he quickly looked away. His face wasn't in a sneer like it normally was, but a soft smile. It really was rather cute.
How long had he been looking at me like that?
I saw Pomfrey coming over, so I sat up. No doubt she found out about my little secret, and wanted to ask me about it.
I suppose that all it meant was that I wouldn't be allowed to go off on my own for a long time.
She drew the curtain around my bed. It was a shame really. Now I couldn't see Draco.
Draco's POV:
Pomfrey pulled the curtains around the bed, and I instantly wished she hadn't. I don't think she put a silencing charm on it though. I strained my ears, and I could finally hear the conversation.
"What?"that was Harry.
"May I see your wrists?"
He sighed. I'm supposing he held out his wrist.
She gasped. "So the exam was correct."
"Yes it was. Now tell me what you want or leave!" Harry snapped back. I wonder exactly what they were talking about.
"You understand that I can not permit you being alone for very long now, don't you? But I really want to know why." She sounded ever so sad.
"Why? You want to know why? Because my life has been an ass after the war, and my stupid wand won't kill it's own master."
Wait what? Was Harry trying to kill himself? I guess that would explain it. He never shows his wrists, made a few trips to St. Mungos. And of course his wand wouldn't kill him. And nobody else will. Unless he goes to Azkaban.
But still, what in his life was so bad, that he wanted to kill himself? What was that painful?
Of course, I always thought of suicide, but I never actually did it. Maybe it was because I thought if Harry lived then so would I. Or maybe I was just hoping of that small chance he would like me back.
Of course he didn't. And I thought about it a lot during the war. I knew that if he died, I would to. There wasn't a question. If Harry dies, so do I.
"-five times." Pomfrey said, and I snapped out of my thoughts. He had tried suicide five times?
Harry POV:
"So, who found you the five times?"
"Ron, Hermione, Hermione, Professor McGonagal, and Hermione." I muttered off the list. McGonagal was the only professor to know other than Dumbledore. Ron and Hermione know simply because they found me, and Hermione kept a watchful eye on me at all times.
Pomfrey nodded, and pushed away the curtains. Then she left.
I looked at Draco, and he was looking away, but I could tell he had heard everything.
"Oh stop your pitying Malfoy! Really, it doesn't look good on you!" I didn't mean to add the last part.
"Fine. I won't tell anyone about this either. But I want to know what it was that made you want to kill yourself."
"Why do you care?" I asked. I knew I would end up telling him anyway, but it still wasn't like him to care about me or my friends, or anyone really.
"Because I would like to compare them to my own."
I let that sink in. He fidgeted around a bit, looking at the bed only.
"You tried to commit suicide?" I asked astonished. Was it because of his parents? The fact that he's almost an orphan now would explain a lot.
He shook his head. "No. But often have I thought about it."
"I can't tell you why. No one knows, not even the people who found me know. Though I assume Dumbledore does."
"You know what the say about 'assume'. It makes an'ass'out of 'u' and 'me'."
I smiled. Then frowned.
"You know, I don't think there really is one reason for why I did it. At first I suppose it was because I thought myself not good enough for every day life. I was so prepared to die during the battle. Then it's because I finally found someone I think I like a lot, and I realised they hate me." I shifted uncomfortably on the bed.
Draco POV:
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You thought you weren't good enough? For what? Modern day life? This girl you fancy? Happiness? If anyone deserves a shot at happiness, don't you think it's the man who fought the hardest in the war? Or is my mind just a little messed up?"
I knew this wasn't going to get him to like me any more. Probably just make him angry.
But he wasn't angry. He shook his head, and looked me in the eyes. "It's not a girl."
Wait a minute. Did I really just hear that? Did I really just hear him admit to being gay?Oh my fucking god.
"So you're gay?" I asked. I can't believe I actually said that. Did I really? He'll hate me for this.
"Why do you want to know? So you can go tell the whole school? The Daily Prophet?" Crap.
"Why would I tell anyone?" He looked at me, and I saw the anger slowly melt. "How about we agree, everything we heard and said, stays in this room."
He nodded. "Agreed."
It was silent for a while. "Will you tell me?"
"What?"
"Will you tell me why you thought of killing yourself?"
I sighed. Of course this was coming I knew it. "Close your eyes. And I'll tell you."
He looked at me questioningly, but did as iI asked. I got out of bed, wobbly first, and walked over to his making as little noise as possible. This was my only chance. To tell him how I feel. Of course, when I'm done he'll probably hex me and tell me to never talk, look, or touch him again. But we weren't getting very far anyway.
So I did the only thing that would explain my love to him. I leaned down, and kissed him.
Hermione POV:
I was in the library (as usual) thinking about the match. Why did Malfoy save Harry? Was it to pay the debt? Or something more? They have each been giving each other strange looks. And I knew Malfoy was hiding something behind his sneers and mean comments.
I thought back to when Harry had been trying to kill himself. The first time Ron found him. They didn't tell me. I knew something was up. They had to explain to me when I found him lying unconscious on the floor, cuts on his arms.
He's tried that three other times since then. I found him twice more, and Professor McGonagal found him as well.
He doesn't seem safe alone.
Anyway, I know there's something going on between Harry and Malfoy. And not just the normal fighting either.
Could it be possible they like each other?
I shook my head at the idea. Simply crazy!
All thoughts of them vanished when someone sat across from me. Someone I never thought would. Someone, being a Slytherin.
Well? What do you think?
Does it make up for the days I missed?
Yay! Draco finally kissed Harry. How will he react?
Will Hermione find out? And who is the Slytherin who sat across from her?
(BTW it is a boy)
And will Ron ever get to say his POV? Will he ever fall in love?
It all clicks together in my mind!
In my very dirty, sarcastic, mean, snarkish,
food-loving, Justin Beiber-hating, Harry Potter mind!
As always, if you have a few ideas for the story, or would simply like to comment on it,
explain what you didn't like, what you did like, just leave a review.
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