Love can be unclear, confusing, and most of all degrading. It's the time you realize your feelings that everything begins to end. Actions put into motion, as one is drove by lust and desire to do the unthinkable. Loosing yourself in this cycle can be dangerous as you weed out the feelings of the other. Doing your best to hold together a relationship that may not last and for what? Disappointment that only leads to destruction.

Mello called early this morning the one day I found that maybe not only is love blind, but inseparable. I did everything that day to see clearly, but how in such a short amount of time had I come to fall in love with him. I did not understand I did not want to understand. If I could, I would take it back. I for would forget about it all.

"You alright?" Light stood there in the doorway of the bathroom, towel in hair, toothbrush in mouth, and shirtless. I felt my face begin to heat up the longer he stood there. Therefore, making myself busy I began to make the bed.

"Y-yes." I lied feeling the pit of my stomach drop two inches not in agony, but in fear. Light what did he mean to me now? I had no way of knowing or perhaps I had not wanted to know. The answer frightened me greatly. I knew deep down what it was I had felt and it was realizing it that would take me time to do.

Copping a glance over my shoulder, I glanced at him as he dried his hair messing it up slightly causing me to release a giggle. He turned in my direction quickly giving me his full attention, which made me jump a little.

"Matt?" His eyes stared at me the look he held grabbing a hold of me and pulling. I wanted to run that afternoon. Oh, god how I wanted to run. This was not what was supposed to happen. Things were supposed be between me and Mello and only me and Mello. So, why did I allow it to happen?

"Matt are you alright?"

I looked up at him. Was he really concerned about me? Nodding my head quickly I brushed past him. I had to forget the idea that I had fallen for him. It wasn't true to begin with and I knew I loved Mello more than anything. More than I loved myself. Mello was the world and everything above it to me. There was no one else. No one…

"Have you called him?" I questioned swallowing down every emotion I had gotten in that moment trading it for simple assurance that told me it was nothing more than a feeling. A feeling that would go away as soon as I saw Mello. I believed that I truly did know it then.

"Yeah." He dug the device out of his pocket flipping it open. "No, he hasn't called me back."

I nodded walking out of the bedroom and into the living room. Sitting down on the couch, I pulled my legs up to my chest resting my chin on my knees. Not much went through my head that day. Letting out a breath I caste my eyes down towards the carpet.

"Cheer up. From what you told me about your friend, it sounds like he can take care of himself. He'll be back."

Mello would have liked to hear that. He was a prideful man full of ambition and determination. Nothing could have stopped him. Smiling I nodded my head looking back down. The smile slowly began to fade as I thought about it.

I only cared about him that's why…

"B-but I want to help him so much. He just won't let me, and it kills me! I know. Mello has never wanted anyone's help before in fact, he detests it, but I have been in love with him ever since I was a kid. it's just not—"

Eyes opened wide confusion burning in the bottom of my stomach an ominous feeling arose inside of me. That was the day, the moment, the time; the sky fell on top of me.

Sucks I know, but I was pressed for time and tried to write this as fast as I could I'm sorry.