"Draco! Darco, darlig!" Ebony screamed, rushing through the corridors, searching for her beloved boyfriend.
Draco could hear her perfectly well, but he had enlisted the help of Peeves.
"Your blokey went that-a-way, Ebony," he said, grinning devilishly.
"Eek!"
The poltergeist was hiding inside a suit of armor, so his voice had startled the vampire. He was pointing towards the Slytherin common room.
"Fangz," she said, heading towards the dungeon steps. Then she grinned. "Geddit, cuz im goffick!"
"…goffick?" Peeves repeated, at a loss for words for what may have been the first time in his life.
Draco popped out of a broom closet. His back ached and he smelled a bit like mothballs, but, hey, that was a small price to pay to get away from Enoby.
"Thanks," he said to Peeves, handing him a few firecrackers to throw into people's foods at dinner. Except for Crabbe, Goyle, and Draco's, that is.
Peeves began to zip away, but Draco stopped him. "Wait. Ebony will probably sit next to me or across from me." He smirked and handed Peeves an extra firework. "Put an extra in hers."
OoOoO
Harry climbed through the portrait hole, followed by Ginny. Harry was still disturbed by the events of the afternoon, and his facial expression showed it. As he sunk down into a chair, Ron said, "What's wrong?"
"…Ebony kissed me," Harry said blankly. "Why did she kiss me? I can't even stand her!"
"She seriously kissed you?" Ron said in disbelief. "Cho, Ginny, now Ebony… do psycho girls just have a thing for you?"
"Hey!" Ginny exclaimed indignantly.
Pavarti looked up from her Divination essay (The Sight is a very rare gift. Explain why) and put down her quill. "Wasn't she the girl who went batshit insane in Potions yesterday?"
Ginny nodded. "That would be her. Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way."
"What kind of a jerk would hate their kid enough to make one of her middle names Dementia?" asked Dean. "I mean, doesn't it mean 'crazy' or something?"
"Close," said Hermione, who was surrounded by Arithmancy books and charts. "Dementia is a mental disease that affects the mind and memory."
"Even if it didn't," Ginny commented, "I wouldn't like having that many names, anyway."
OoOoO
Ebony took out her cell phone (not without a "How does that work here?" from Hermione) just before dinner.
"Willow," she said, "hogwarz is fallin to shee! No won cn remsdfer me! Drago thinz that he hats me! And B'luddy Marie thinks that she's Muggl-borne."
"Bitch, that suckz," her friend said on the other end. "If eet getz ny werse, I'll cum dewn der 2 help u."
"K."
Draco picked the wrong time to have Ebony's dinner explode in her face.
Willow Black was at Hogwarts by the end of the week.
A/N: I wrote this while listening to Paparazzi by Lady Gaga. Awesome? I think so.
~ Cookie VanDeKamp ~