Ch 5; Daniele's Dungeon
I finally understand why he chained us together. I think Dick realizes how much of a competitor I am. I THINK he wanted Dani to trust me, and consider me an ally to her team. I think he wanted us to work together, but I know for a fact he wouldn't like us working so closely as we have.
After evictions and Keith was sent home, we expected a competition immediately. The black screen remained opened, however, and no work was being done to the backyard. We waited for two minutes until just going back to our business.
It's officially day four of being chained to Dani at exactly 12AM, but I still have to wait until the END of the seventh day to remove these chains...
It's not that bad though, since Dani and I are getting along more often. I learned a lot about her past, actually. Things I never would've known about her if it weren't for Dick forcing us to spend time together! Spending 96 hours strait with a person really changes your relationship with them.
Dani asks why Cassi keeps glaring at me, and at first I say I don't know. Then Dani starts saying that she may be mad at me because she thinks we're in an alliance now or something.
"No, no. It's- ...well, she thinks I'm gay."
Dani says that she's strait, and I say the same.
"...but, I mean... It's not like I -haven't- ever had... maybe... like, ...a tiny, tiny crush on a girl before." admit.
"I haven't. I don't understand- well..." she says softly.
I look at her curiously.
"I mean, there was once that I sorta, ...I don't know. Never mind."
"What?"
"It's nothing. Just... ...I used to have these... -thoughts- about, ...kissing. Some... Female. Before."
Complete dead silence.
"...well, I've read that it's actually a healthy part of life to be curious about same-sex relations." I say.
"And it's not like I'm gay!"
"Or bi!" I add.
"Or bi curious."
Again, silence. Subtle agreement, clouded with lingering doubt.
"So what was it like?" I start, afraid to ask but wanting to know more. "Kissing that... female."
"She never wanted to." Dani says, strain in her voice, like she didn't want to seem disappointed.
"...oh."
We lay for another few hours, trying to get some sleep. It was weighing heavily on my mind at this point though, and I wasn't going to get to sleep until I'd figured out what these thoughts buzzing around my head were.
"Dani?"
She turns her head.
"What?"
"Umm..." I start, my hands shaking. "Do you... ever, ...um..."
She was starting to look annoyed, so I just blurt it out.
"Do you ever still w-wonder what it be like t-to kiss a girl?"
Her expression totally changed. Her pupils got big and her face became flush instantly.
"...well..."
...w-well? I was expecting 'no'. I was expecting her to rip my head off for what I was suggesting! But to my dismay, she did nothing.
"Oh my god... You want to kiss me..." She breaths.
"I never-" I start in my defense, but Dani wraps her free arm around my waist.
"S-said... Th-that..."
I feel myself slowly gravitate towards her, and without thinking, lock my lips to her soft, wet complexion.
Our entire bodies tensed when our mouths touched, and my stimuli fires off like crazy. Before I knew what was going on Dani and I were kissing each other over and over; the motions were short and came one after another, until Dani put her hand on my cheek and guided my head down as she rest hers on the pillows, still kissing me every intimate second.
Now sliding her fingers to the back of my neck, I discover our actions slow and her movements become smooth and calm. I was lost in my own blissful world until I felt her sucking on my bottom lip, and my senses spike again. I knew if I didn't stop there, I'd end up doing something I'd regret.
I pull away, and we're both awkwardly tense. I tell her good night and she nods shakily before turning over and falling asleep.
I store at her for a moment, though. Wondering about it is one think, but to take the next step and go ahead and do it? It was more than that though. What I experienced wasn't a kiss... but absolute heaven. My emotions flared up like fireworks, and I had the urge to... to push my tongue in her mouth. Thinking about it is perfectly normal, but the feelings I experienced, the rush, the excitement, the passion...
I'd awoken somehow wrapped in her arms; she was still asleep though it could be our bodies reacting to the intimacy we'd experienced last night.
...or maybe Dani was cuddling after I fell asleep?
My better-judgment is drowned out over my hormones, and I push my mouth to hers for a brief moment.
I hear Dani gasp, and I pull away instantly.
"Sorry! Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" I say.
She takes a couple deep breaths, then looks up and says "its fine, its fine. Don't, worry about it."
A reaction like this is hard to read the subtext. I couldn't tell if she meant it in a way like 'I don't mind' or 'don't let it happen again'.
"Oh shit..." she moans, and twists her head back.
"What?" I ask, and she points towards the patio.
Keith was starring directly at us, along with the rest of the breakfast club. Their eyes were wide and their mouths hung open.
"I'll go tell them what happened!" I reply immediately. "That I kissed you without your consent."
"Why?" Dani asks in a panic.
"Cause that's what happened and I don't want anyone getting the wrong idea!"
She was still panting from how I'd awoke her this morning.
"That, IS, what happened, right?" I ask her, now wondering myself.
"I... Don't... Know?"
Despite the mass confusion of what was going on, I still had to tell them something.
"Look, you stay here, and I'll-"
Just as I'm getting up, I feel the chains around our wrists pull.
"Oh god..." I moan. "This day just got longer."
"Where you girls think you're going?" Jeff asks when we try to enter the house.
He, Adam, and Jordan were on the patio. Me and Dani were trying to avoid them all together, but no such luck.
"Would either of you two like to explain what you were doing over there?" He asks coyly.
"..." We look at each other.
"Oh, you know..." I trail. "Just, sleeping."
Jordan gasps, which half sounded like a laugh. "You're such a liar! We all saw you kissing her!"
"Oh my god..." I sigh, dropping my head in my hands.
Dani's face turned red, but she tried to talk in a way like it's not a big deal. "So?"
"So! ..." Jordan starts, then her face puzzles. "Your girls!"
How innocent.
I'm sure this will spread through the house by... ten minutes? It's big brother; gossip tends to travel at a faster rate when you're trapped in a fixed area for a certain amount of time! Actually, ten minutes is plenty enough time for everyone to have heard! And since there's no point trying to stop it, we may as well set the record straight while we can, before people start thinking we're involved.
"Okay, I know it LOOKED like I..." How can I explain something when I can't confess to it myself? "Was... close, to Dani this morning..."
They looked amused with my denial.
"But it's only because... umm..." Because... oh yeah! "Because we just wanted to know what it was like! R-right..." I stutter. "And that's all there is too it."
I look to Dani in confirmation, and she nods.
"So what was it like?" Adam asks, laughing,
"What?" We both respond simultaneously.
"What was it like kissing Daniele?" Jeff clarifies.
For better or worse, Rachel walks out to the patio. It temporarily got me out of answering the question, at the price of the person with the loudest mouth possibly finding out what happened. Once Rachel hears word of two of her greatest rivals becoming this close, there's no limit to how far she can stretch the truth.
"Heeey!" She greets, then plops a seat on the other side of the couch.
"I gotta go... brush my teeth." Dani says irritated.
"And I-"
She was already pulling me along.
"Uh- have to- uh- follow, her. I guess!" I finish, already through the door.
Instead of grabbing her tooth brush, she sits down in the metal room for a little and goes through her things.
"..."
I kinda wanted to ask her what she was doing. She was just... picking things up and putting them back. Some held longer than others, while some went untouched.
I couldn't really talk to her though. If things weren't already awkward as they were, I went ahead and took that next step. I think she enjoyed kissing me last night... I really do! We've both experienced a lack of affection in this house, and by kissing her, and falling asleep by her side, and waking up in her arms... up to that point it's just a matter of curiosity, mixed with the amplified effects this house causes. When I kissed her after I woke up, however, this was completely different! Like when I felt the need to shove my tongue down her throat... except that time I was able to control myself. Being chained to her was seriously pushing my mental limits, and fucking up my psychiatric state of mind.
That's what I was feeling. Confused. I don't know what to make of any of this, nor what she's feeling.
Kalia walks in the room now, after a good nine minutes of sitting in here. Why nine? It no more than that, because apparently she hasn't heard the news yet.
"Well?" Kalia asks, but no one was asking her a question.
"Yes." Dani answers. "But I haven't talked to her about it."
"Do you want me to leave?" Kalia asks then. What's going on?
Dani nods "I do, as a matter of fact. I think, you should go sit outside with Jeff and Adam and that group for a little before we make any... final, decisions."
Kalia looks at me briefly, then back at Dani. Then leaves.
"What was that all about?" I glare.
"Okay Mel..." She yawns. "So the past couple days we've been chained together."
"No, I didn't notice!" I reply.
"Whatever." Dani rolls her eyes. "Anyway, Kalia and I have been talking while you're asleep, and we thought maybe we should team up together."
"Wait!" I object. "We as in, you me and Kalia?"
"And Porsche and Cassi." She corrects. "Kalia's already talked to both, and they said they're not agreeing to anything until talking to you."
She pauses on that, as if just realizing how it sounds out loud. "They're really loyal to you, you know."
I smile confidently.
"So Cassi and Porsche will be in here any second, and Kalia will be back, and hopefully they'll already- umm..." She suddenly gets quiet. "Heard, about our... encounters."
"Yes..." I awkwardly reply.
"So, let's face it. Kalia will do anything I say, and Cassi and Porsche will do anything you say... why not work on the same side, pick off the veterans, chop off the floaters, and make a deal to the final five?"
The offer was irresistible! And it made so much sense. My crew was already filled in on the situation, so I don't see any reason to refuse!
Except...
What if this is one of Dani's tricks? My team has been tricked more than once in this season, and Dani's been setting traps since day one! How can I know for sure she isn't just sucking us into another one of her schemes?
"Well I'll have to talk to the girls about this before making any... final, decisions." I answer.
She raises her eyebrow, but agrees to the delay anyway. We wait a little longer before Porsche walks in.
"Hey." I smile,
"Well, it's about time we've had a game talk." She smiles. "We're not used to not having one at least every five minutes!"
Dani smiles. I imagine she and Kalia talk about strategy often too.
Kalia and Cassi enter quickly after, to avoid anyone else seeing us.
"Melanie, you better start explaining a few things!"
Of all the people, Cassi be the one to make the biggest deal of all this I'm sure.
"We can talk about it later..." I blush. "So... To be completely clear, what's being offered here is a final-five deal?" I confirm. More for their sake then my own.
"That's what I heard." Porsche agrees.
"Yeah? I've heard quite a bit myself!" She glares at me.
"THIS IS NOT THE ISSUE!" I stress, and the group stares at me. "...um, Okay. Since there really not a way to talk with you guys privately, just... if you don't want to rush into deal right away we can put it off until after the cuffs are off."
"No." Dani protests.
We look at her.
"Just... look, if you don't trust me just say it to my face. We'll work something out." Dani explains. "I just... I need a commitment from you guys before the HoH. Power had a lot of influence on the house, and I need to know very shortly, while all sides of the house are nutural, weather we can do this or not."
"She's right... If one of us were to win HoH, there's no way we'd protect team Dani over then Vets. Same thing goes for them... we want to stay on the Vets good side as long as we can. By promising now, we're evening out the chances of power before it happens." I say, trying to set the example to my team that it's safe to speak their minds. "I'm in on this, as long as both of you are one-hundred percent confident."
They look at each other. I think maybe they think that I'm being manipulated... but that's one line they won't dare cross at this time, no matter how open we're being.
"I think it's worth a try." Porsche decides after extensive thinking.
"...Yeah, I guess." Cassi gives. "But at the end of the day I'm still watching my back before anyone else."
"Kalia...?" Dani questions.
"If they're on board, then yeah! Let's get this show on the road."
For now everyone disperse, besides the two who're chained together; trapped within ear-shot of the quietest secrets, trapped in the peripheral vision of every little movement... forced to be at each other's side, freedom taunting us by the key hanging off the string at my throat.
Mid-day, and finally the HoH competition is starting.
This one was based on speed and timing, with some logic.
I think this was a pretty good week to win it, actually. We all know who we want out, and none of us (except Lawon) are our targets... So maybe I'll go ahead and win this one! I didn't get the chance to tell my team- I mean...my final three team, but they may come to the same conclusion on their own.
For this competition, we have to run from our tree and pick up apples that were scattered around the yard. each apple had a number; one through ten grams, written on its 'leaf', which was actually just a green piece of plastic hanging off the top. You had to collect the apples and put them in the funneled bin at the base of the tree. From there, we use the pulley system to raise the basket, and the apples drop into the hole near the top of the tree. Whoever has the most apples, regardless of the number, on the leaf, wins the HoH.
"But be careful." Julie announces. "Because you can only place a total of ten 'grams' in the basket at one time."
Not really. Just for gaming purposes.
"On your mark..."
We all lean in, like professional track-stars do.
"Get set..."
Our tensions strained...
"...GO!"
The key to this competition was to grab as many of the little numbered apples as we could. Unfortunately, almost all the apples were nine and ten. There had to be at least three gazillion out here... yeah, if they ever ask how many total apples are in the yard, I'm gonna say 'three gazillion'. Like, in an estimating contest. ...why not?
Using the pulley took a lot of time. If you could go and find three apples that add up to ten, it would take less time than to just grab the first apple you see, throw it on, and start reeling it up. That basket/funnel thing moves about an inch for every two feet you pull!
That's why we all tried to find numbers like threes or fours, and stick at least two at a time.
My strategy? Whenever I found a ten, I threw it in someone else's pile. We all had a general area we searched, so when I found one I didn't like, I tossed it over to Adam or Jeff. Turns out a lot of people had that idea though, so the ten apples just kept getting mixed back in.
So I'd find a four, and go looking for anything six or smaller. THAT was my worst move. Everyone else saved up their smaller numbers at the side of their basket, until the accidentally came across a six or a five, or two threes. Putting two fours up was the same as putting a four and a six, except six was more easy to find! I could have done what some of the smart people were doing and just evened everything extra I had within the last minute of the game, but no. I didn't realize till later.
"House guests, it is time to count your apples." Julie says once the timer rings.
Lawon still had two going up, but couldn't make it in time before Julie yelled at him to stop.
They came down in segments. This design was really, really extravagant! There were little separators between every one or two, showing where each deposit starts and ends. How the hell would you program something like that?
Once a team came and made sure each segment was less than or equal to ten, they dropped the separators and all the apples lined up. Instead of counting each individual one, they measured by row.
Clearly me and Lawon had the lowest. So much for winning... From there all there is to worry about are Adam and Shelly, and the rest of us are all on the same page!
"Congratulations Daniele, you are the new head of household!"
No way!
"Dani what were you thinking?" I accuse once we're safely inside the metal room. Only Kalia was with us.
"Are you kidding? I wasn't trying to win; I was just trying to beat Lawon!" She sasses back.
"Uh, Lawon came in last place." Kalia points out. "Everyone beat him."
"I know that!" She glares back.
"What's going on now?" Porsche asks, entering the room.
"...look, we'll talk about this later." Dani instructs. "After everyone else comes to talk to me about nominations."
With that, Kalia and Porsche leave.
I try to leave too, but me and Dani are called into the diary room. Time for the cuffs to go back on! Oh, joy...
They also handed her the HoH key after chaining us up.
"WHO WANTS TO SEE MY HOH ROOOM!" She calls cutely.
"Do I have a choice?"
She glares at me, but smiles anyway.
Once up, we looked at all the pictures (She turned over the ones with her father in them), went through her snacks, and she read the letter from her family.
Of course, it was from her father.
"Okay... he says... To my lovely daughter Daniele." She begins.
Everyone 'awwwww!'s.
"For starters I want to apologize for chaining you to Melanie. But I think this will help further your game in the future."
Called it.
"I have sent the food you've been requesting, except for the candy because it's not good for your teeth!"
Oh, dads!
"I miss you very much, and hope to see you after you win big brother." She finishes, and sets the letter down.
"Aww!" Jordan smiles, starting to cry a little.
Dani could care less though. She may even be a little pissed off with him for not sending any candy. ...damn I really want some candy right now! I can't though cause I'm still on slop. And there's no candy. Fuck.
Eventually everyone clears out, except Lawon. THIS is gonna be a fun conversation!
"Yo Shelly, you mind if I talk to Dani here for a minute?"
Shelly leaves, and here we are!
"...so, I'm just gonna ask, are you two on the same team now, or... what's going on here? Cause I can help you out."
We look at each other.
"Well, I mean, we're chained to each other, but regarding game nothing's really happened up until this point." Dani answers. Smart move, smart move.
"So this is like, the first time you two have talked about something regarding the game?" He re-states.
"Uh, yeah? That's what she just said." I snap.
"...I can help you both." He starts, ignoring my previous comment. "I can be on your side; we can get rid of these Vets right now before they drive us all out!"
He was really, REALLY trying here. He was worked up, he was into it, he was energetic...
"...well I'll think about it." Dani shrugs.
"Look, I'm serious. I'm not playin! Keith is gone, and I'mma be honest with you, he was the one who orchestrated all this shit. Like- I swear, I had nothing to do with it, I just thought we were playin the game, I didn't know he was gonna be serious, you know." Lawon continues.
Dani's just sitting, nodding her head, waiting for him to go away, and the next person come up.
"Well okay, I'll definitely think about it." She says, a little more irritated.
Lawon gets the hint.
"Alright now."
Then leaves.
We had maybe five minutes before someone else cycled their way up. We figured it would be Jeff, but it turns out Shelly came up.
"Knock knock." She announces.
I get up and open the door, which actually wasn't much help cause Dani had to get up too in order for me to reach.
"Hey, mind if I talk to you two for a sec?"
"Come on in." Dani says flatly.
Shelly takes a seat.
"So, I was just thinking of nominating Lawon, and maybe like, Jordan or someone as a pawn." Dani starts explaining right off the back.
"..." Shelly doesn't respond.
"...so, like, don't worry, I'm not gonna put you up or anything."
Shelly just sorta sat there; looking at the floor, her chin resting in her palm... ...what the fuck is she doing?
"...is there, someone else you think needs to go up?" Dani asks, trying to get a response. "I mean, tell me what you're thinking, otherwise..." her voice trails.
"You know who I think needs to go up? I think you need to put Melanie on the block."
Uh, WHAT?
"You do know that I'm right here?" I question, raising an eyebrow.
"And I have nothing against you! You're a great player, a strong competitor, a good person... but I'm not HoH. I'm not the one who makes these decisions!" Shelly explains.
"Okay well if you think she's such a good person, why are you coming up here and telling me she needs to go on the block? Like, what's your logic in telling me this?" Dani defends.
"BECAUSE YOU TWO HATE EACH OTHER!" She freaks. "Dani, common! What the hell is going on? It's your logic I don't understand! You two can't stand each other, you yell at her and bicker all the time, and you've told me she's more annoying than Rachel!"
...
"And you!" She looks at me. "Daniele has done nothing but lie and deceive you from day one. She's called you stupid to your face, and I've seen you cry because of how she's treated you. And I just want to know if it's all just an act, or if you've lost your minds, or what the hell is going on cause I have heard so many different things from so many people and I can't believe any of it is true." She finishes her fit.
I look to Dani, who now had tears in her eyes.
"Melanie... I've made you cry...?"
Back a few weeks ago, with the whole thing where she thought I lied about the cards... I forgot about that though until Shelly mentioned it.
"Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry!"
She wrapped her arms around me as best she could with the chain. Shelly was right... Mine and Dani's relationship has dramatically changed since we've been cuffed together.
"Unbelievable." Shelly sighs, and then stands up.
"Wait!" Dani calls, releasing me form her grip. "Shelly, um... I don't know exactly know myself what's going on yet. But I do know that for the past four days, I've learned so much about Melanie and she's the complete opposite of what I thought she was. ...look, I don't know what, rumors are going around the house, but I promise you there's really, really nothing going on between me and Mel besides a little experimenting. It's nothing that effects my game, it's nothing that's gonna change hers. Alright?"
Shelly takes a deep breath, and then nods on the exhale. "I trust you guys. But that doesn't mean I approve of what's going on, weather your 'just experimenting or not...'
Oh...
"...I understand." Dani swallows, and Shelly leaves.
"Wow..." I comment when she's already halfway down the steps.
"You have to expect people aren't gonna like this... whatever this is that's going on between us." Dani admits.
"I know, but..." I pause.
She looks at me intently.
"...never mind."
"What? What is it?" She asks, putting her hand on my shoulder.
"This! This, care and concern! I don't mean to freak out like Shelly was, but she has a point!" I whine. "You've never acted like this before, ever."
"...I care about you Mel." She says, the tears once again welling up in her eyes. "I'm sorry... I feel so bad for the way I treated you, I guess... I just didn't know you then and I thought I did, and I treated you like a jerk when you were nothing like I thought, and-"
"And what DID you think?" I say, considering the fact that she kept bringing it up.
"I thought you were like everybody else." She admits. "But you're not..."
She looks away, and tries to gather her thoughts.
"Mel, you're so, so different than anyone I've ever met. You mean something to me..."
...oh my god how sweet.
"...and, it's been a while since anyone's actually cared about me like this, and I didn't think anyone would even try, so I thought if I acted like a jerk, than no one else would get the chance to treat me bad first and..."
"Dani! Dani Dani Dani... chill out!" I assert.
She had tears streaming down her cheeks now. It was apparent she regret the way she's treated me.
"...it's okay. I forgive you, really! You don't gotta cry..."
She smiles. "I'm not... crying..." and tries to laugh it off.
I wanted to get closer to her, but I was afraid to. I don't know where are relationship stands, but until Jeff come to talk to us about nominations, until Porsche and Cassi and Kalia come talk to us about this alliance, and until everyone else is done talking about this game for the day, we can't really talk about this openly and honestly.
"...I think we have company. Should I tell them to wait a minute?" I ask. "It's Jeff, Jordan, and Rachel."
"No, no... I'm alright."
The doorbell rings.
"Tell them to come in; I don't want anyone getting the wrong idea..." She command.
"It's unlocked!" I yell, and the three enter.
Jeff and Jordan sit against each other on the couch, while Rachel plops herself on the chair next to it.
"We're not interrupting your alone time, right?" Rachel asks, smiling devilishly.
"RACHEL!" Jordan warns, glaring at her.
"What? What am I doing wrong? I just wanted to know if-"
"Who are you putting up?" Jeff interrupts, getting strait to the point.
"Well, obviously Lawon's going up." She states.
"We were thinking maybe it's better if we backdoored him." Jordan adds.
That's a little risky.
"...okay, but I'd need two pawns then, and I don't really want that responsibility." She reasons.
"You won't have to. Put up me and Melanie..." He starts.
I don't like where this is going.
"Not that I'm just volunteering you, but we're the strongest competitors in this house." He explains. "Plus this way there's a chance that he won't play in the veto, and if anyone wins we're all gonna use it no matter what..."
"Cause like..." Rachel interrupts. "The Vets want him out, and I know you two want him out, and Kalia and Cassi will listen to, well, pretty much anything you say. And Shelly Adam and Porsche just follow whoever's in power, so no matter what, like, unless Lawon plays in it, someone's gonna use the veto."
They haven't even gotten that Porsche and I are on a team. They're nowhere near learning our secret alliance!
"Okay... so, what your saying is, we're gonna try and not let Lawon have the chance to defend himself." Dani asks.
"Yes." Jeff confirms. "And like I said, I'll go up, no problem. If Mel doesn't feel safe going up..."
"I'm fine with it." I say to everyone's shock.
"...you have nothing to lose by taking this opportunity. It's like you said, it's just a matter of trying to get him not to play in the veto." Jeff reiterates.
"I mean, I'll have to think about it. I'll let you guys know like, the second I make up my mind though! I'm not gonna just surprise you at nominations or anything." She explains.
"Sounds good." Jeff states, then hops up.
Rachel leaves out the door, chiming "Bye bye love birds!"
She tries. She tries.
After they're gone, Dani and I start talking about this offer.
"...Mel are you really sure you want to volunteer yourself like this?"
"Well... yeah!" I respond. "I know when it comes to math I'm not exactly the BEST person to pick, but he has a point! Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I'm pretty agile, I have incredible balance, I know this game inside and out, and puzzle or jigsaw-"
"It's not your skills that I doubt!" She blurts. "It's where your putting your trust that I'm concerned with."
"...they want Lawon out too though." I reason.
"Why? Because he's a liar and a cheater and no good to anyone anyways? What's the purpose of getting him out if he can't do anything?" She argues.
...
"All I'm saying is what if this is a trap? It's likely the Vets want to get rid of someone in power, and they've already proved they view you as a strong competitor. And what happens if Jeff or the Vets win? What if they leave nominations the same? Do you think we have the numbers to keep you safe? Adam and Shelly are one hundred percent loyal to the Vets, you know. And if you doubt that how about we take a look back at how Shelly reacted to these little rumors?"
...
"You don't realize how much of a risk you're taking, offering to go on the block!" She finishes.
"Dani, ...maybe I can't fully trust the Vets, but I trust YOU." I start. "...you threw that bean bag off on purpose."
At first she's puzzled, but then she remembers the corn hole competition. She threw off and we tied scores.
"I just figured if you won it, it would seem like backdooring Brendon would seem more like a forced decision." She objects.
She wouldn't look at me in the eyes though.
I smile. "You did not! You KNEW you were going to win! Everyone knew! What they didn't know was you were trying to win it for me."
She blushes now, and still won't look at me.
"I was trying to backdoor someone!"
"Then why didn't you use it on Rachel?"
She was stuck. "Well- ...cause she got Dominic evicted!"
I laugh. "You didn't even remember, see!"
"Mel! What's your point?"
"I'm just saying, if I go up then I know you'll look out for me. I know I can trust that we won't just... let Jeff win. We do have numbers... Some of those numbers may be blurred to everyone else, but... this is no different than two weeks ago when I went up." I explain. "Just, trust me, I know the risks. I know if Brendon wins the veto, we can convince him to use it. I know if he doesn't, that you're not just gonna give up on me. I could have everyone else in the house against me, but as long as I have you on my side, ...not to sound cliché but there's nothing we can't do."
"..." Finally, she looks at me. "I appreciate you doing this for me."
"Yeah."
Things are just going so, so well for us. And it's just so, so so so incredible that the two of us could be working together like this. I... I don't want these handcuffs to come off. Then we have to pretend like there's nothing going on, and we won't have that excuse that we have to be together every second of every day.
A curse? This is more like a blessing.
"DING!"
The doorbell rings, and it's Kalia this time. I guess it's time for us to start filing in and talking about this new alliance thing.
"And now I can't protect myself next week, which is so stupid cause there's really no reason for me to win this week really other then the fact that I might go up as a pawn?" Dani explains, finally getting to answer Porsche's question of why she didn't want to win HoH.
"It's not like we don't have your back." Cassi explains.
"Yeah, and like you said earlier, the Vets are pretty sneaky. Lawon might not be their target." I add.
"Hm?" Kalia questions.
"...okay well, Jeff came up to talk earlier as you know." I state.
"And he basically said we should back door Lawon and volunteered himself and Mel to go up." Dani finishes.
"Wait, what?" Cassi says. "Mel, you said you wouldn't, right?"
I explain to her my logic, that I trust everyone enough that they'll take me or Jeff off the block.
"If there's no changing you mind..." She sighs, and looks off in another direction.
"Anyway, that's what's up with the nominations. So if we're all clear about the veto, then, I guess there's nothing further to discus!" Dani concludes.
"Oh, that's what you think." Kalia comments. "Can you excuse us for a minute girl?" She asks, referring to Porsche and Cassi. "I need to talk to these two about something for a minute."
Oh shit.
"Sure. I'll have to have a talk with them too, just not right now." Cassi adds.
"Common..." Porsche sighs, and practically drags Cassi out the door; Cassi glaring at me the entire time.
"...sooo..." She starts awkwardly.
"Kalia..." Dani moans. "Don't do this!"
"How can I not feel at least a little offended here?" She says right off the bat. "I mean common! All I hear from everyone is that you two are messing around, kissing each other, just because you wanna know what it's like."
"Well-"
"Well you couldn't come to me? You both know I'm a lesbian, and not once have either of you mentioned a curiosity about this before..." She argues.
That's right. Kalia's a lesbian... I almost forgot about that.
"Kalia, it was more like an instant thing. We didn't plan it or anything, it just... it came up in conversation, and, it just sorta happened! And we didn't mean for anyone else to see it, otherwise I would have come to you before all these rumors started flying around... trust me! There wasn't any actual time for us to talk about it!" Dani desperately explains.
"If it makes you feel any better, we haven't really talked about it either." I add.
Dani nods.
At first Kalia says nothing. I get why she's upset... we went ahead and did something potentially threatening to our game when we could have just asked her about it. I still don't know if hearing about it would have been enough, but we didn't even try. I really do get it!
Finally, she speaks. "Then talk about it. Sort things out, before the rest of the house does for you."
"It's really that bad?" I wince.
"That bad? Two rivals, chained against their will, kissing? And their girls? You think that's not gonna cause a huge ruckus?"
"...ruckus?" I say with the same expression as before.
"Just- work this out. Okay? Figure this out, and we'll talk after nominations."
Before either of us can comment, she leaves.
"...so." Dani says awkwardly.
I take a breath. "If you're not comfortable talking about this, we don't have to you know."
"I wanna talk about this. Openly. Everyone thinks they get what's going on, but truthfully I don't even know. And I get the feeling you don't know either." She says, looking off. "I just don't know where to start."
We both need to sort out our thoughts. She's right, we need to talk about this openly, speak our minds, find out what's really going on with us, rather then just pretend we're just- ...okay why am I still sitting here and thinking about this when I just clearly said we need to be open?
"Kalia's got a point." I start. "When she said we need to figure this out before the rest of the house does it for us."
She looks at me, as if to say she doesn't understand.
"We tell everyone that we were just experimenting, it's just curiosity, there's nothing to it, and eventually we'll start to believe it..." I elaborate. "So... is it?"
There was a long pause. Though she suggest we speak openly, I could tell there was a lot of consideration in her thought process.
"...I liked the kiss." She mutters under her breath.
"W... W-what?"
Dani's mood changed from confident and poised to shy, and slightly uncomfortable. Whatever she'd said, she was clearly not ready to come to terms with herself. I too was nervous... neither of us wanted to say something in fear of upsetting or disappointing the other. As much as I want to talk about the... closeness, of last night, ...quite bluntly I'm afraid to.
"...Dani we're not gonna get anywhere unless we're honest with each other." I state. "Just, tell me how you feel."
"I can't!" She blurts in anger. "How about you tell me how you feel? I... I just need to know before I say anything I might regret."
"I don't want the way I feel to affect your decision!" I argue. "This is ridicules! If you're not gonna tell me the truth, then I'll- I'll just-"
I-I'll...
She store at me, waiting to see how I felt.
"...I guess I'll just have to start..." I say instead, taking a slower approach to the subject. "But, after nominations. I don't really want to be interrupted in the middle of explaining something."
She was still frozen, her thoughts overtaking her mind and body. Without saying anything, she lies down and shuts her eyes. And, we wait.
"...Lawon, you are safe." Jordan reads, handing him his key.
He and the floatees look shocked, as the rest attempt to not smile at their vanity.
All that's left is Jeff's, Rachel's, and mine.
Lawon pulls the key.
"...Melanie. You are safe."
Okay great, so now me and Jeff are on the-
WHAT?
"Jeff, you're a very strong competitor in this game. I see you as a threat to my game play." She announces as planned.
"Rachel, I'm not gonna lie, you're completely useless in this game without Brendon. It's time you quit your whining and leave."
When did this happen? The plan was I was supposed to go up! She even said she'd talk to them if the plans changed. Dani... why?
"Start explaining." Jeff commands, clearly the ring leader of their trio.
"Look, nothing against either of you! I just-"
"What!" He commands.
"I was thinking about the patterns of the game play, and I believe the next competition is bound to be endurance." She finishes, after Jeff so rudely interrupts her.
"So? Mel's good at endurance!" He argues.
"Not when she's on slop." Dani retaliates. "Have you seen the poor girl eat at all this week? She won't stand a chance in an endurance, or type of competition."
...she's good.
"Rachel on the other hand- she's amazing at those types of competitions!" She starts.
Rachel sort of smiles. If Dani has to lie to keep her from being upset...
Jeff rolls his eyes.
"It's not that I don't trust you, I just got to thinking-" She begins again.
"Then why didn't you tell us Daniele?" Jeff interrupts yet again. "The deal was you would say something if your decision changed!"
"I know." She replies. "I'm sorry. But, I was afraid that if I called you up and told you, Mel would say something and try to convince me she was okay to go up, and honestly..."
She looked at me now.
"I don't want to risk her getting hurt."
Oh Dani...
I couldn't help but smile at how sweet she was being. Still, I try to hide my face.
"...right. Well, how many times now have I asked you for advanced notice?" He sighs.
"Jeff, it's not like she's gunning for us. Don't give her a reason too." Jordan warns out of concern.
"We're the ones on the block." Rachel solemnly agrees.
His own team telling him to cool down in front of us. ...she's REALLY good.
"You better put Lawon up when I win that veto." He says with one last threat, then walks out. Jordan follows him, but Rachel and her annoying ass stay.
Jordan looks back before letting the door close, almost glaring at her alliance member.
"Go on. I'll be down in a minute." She says with a smile.
"Don't stay up here too long." Jordan warns, and exits down the stairs.
Me and Dani look at her curiously. What could she possibly want to bug us about.
"Why don't you tell us why you -really- put me up in her place, Daniele." Rachel demands.
Is she catching on to a possible scheme against the Vets? Dani did mention that Lawon, being annoying and useless to everyone, is no threat what-so-ever! Maybe she thinks she's really gunning for them. Maybe she really IS gunning for them! Maybe-
"Just admit it, you didn't want to put Melanie on the block because she's your girlfriend!" Rachel laughs.
...oh. Well I hope neither of them noticed me freaking out.
"She's not my girlfriend. I can't just be concerned for her health?" She glares back.
Rachel stands. "Right Daniele. I'm sure it's just your perfectly innocent soul caring for another human being." She mocks, then leaves.
God, how stupid! Rachel doesn't realize who Dani really is. She hasn't spent four days chained to her, though. I, on the other hand, know Dani better then anyone in this house.
"...so are you gonna tell ME what's really going on?" I say finally.
"Hm?" She perks. "I told you. I don't want you competing."
"Dani," I smile. "We're on the same team. You also told me Lawon was usless to everyone, and he's not a threat and such. Just tell me... are the Vets our target this week? I swear I won't tell anyone! Common."
She frowns. "Mel... I still want Lawon out. I just, don't think it's worth risking your health or your head on the chopping block. ...is it really that hard for people to think I care?"
"No! I mean, I know you care! I just thought maybe it was some sort of coverup." I explain.
"Think of it this way." She states. "If I had called them up before nominations and said I was changing it, would you have tried to convice me otherwise?"
Yeah...
"No!" I deny.
"Liar!" She accuses.
She was right. I would have told her I was fine, I could handle it, don't make things more complicated for my sake... She wouldn't even risk me possibly changing her mind!
"You really do care." I sigh after some thinking.
"Yeah, Mel." She confirms. "You know, I can see why you wouldn't believe me actually."
Hm?
"Because, we started as enemies. We didn't like each other on a personal level, because I was so closed off to making friends. Then you became a threat to my gameplay when I overheard you Cassi and Porsche talking about going after me and Kalia. Then you became my enemy in the game, too. Next thing you know we're chained up, and it brings us into an alliance, but even still, if we were just in an alliance, then why wouldn't I just use you to further everyone's game?"
"What you're saying is..." I trail, looking off, knowing where this is going.
"You're more to me then some pawn. I, genuinely, care for you. Mel."
"Dani, that's so sweet." I smile, still not looking at her though. "but you didn't need to risk getting on the Vet's bad side just for my safety."
"YA SEE!" She snaps. "I TOLD you you'd try to convince me otherwise!"
I loosen from my tense mood.
"Well!" I sway.
"Well nothing! I was SO right!" She giggles, punching my shoulder. "You just admitted it!"
"Well...!" I repeat. She was right. "...whatever!"
Dani shakes her head. I closed my eyes, and lie down, but I could just feel her looking at me.
"You act so cute when you're caught in a lie." She smiles, then lays beside me.
"Excuse me?" I laugh, then look at her.
"Common. That thing you do, where you act like it's not a big deal, then completely ignore the situation like it'll just go away-"
"So?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
"I dunno." She shrugs. "Hey, you didn't wanna go eat or anything, right?"
"No." I reply. "Why? You going to bed?"
"Yeah. That okay?"
"Sure!" I respond. "I don't think I need to do anything else tonight. Need to turn off the lights?"
She nods, and we both get up.
And when I thought she'd forgot...
"So, you'd mentioned earlier you were gonna tell me something after nominations."
Damn. "Yeah, but I thought you wouldn't want to bring it up." I admit.
"I think I do want to know." She replies, her voice not yet swaying into that shy mode.
"...alright." I sigh.
After a moment for me to gather my thoughts, I start my rant.
"So... I think, and I could be wrong, but, by what it seemed, we both found the k-kiss to be appealing." I stutter.
I look to her for any sort of reaction. Her eyes we fixed on our chained hands, but slowly, she nods.
"...but the reason WHY it's so enjoyable to us, might be more then curiosity." I continue.
She smiles, and then scoots closer to me. "Yeah?"
"Yes!" I excite, thinking she's caught on. "You see, being cut off from society has deprived us of our need for affection. I did some thinking, and it's apparent that with us forced to be close together, our minds have tricked us into psychologically replacing a romantic partner for one another. It's only a natural reaction for us to oblige by this-"
"Oh..." She sighs, then turns away.
"...unless, you have a different theory." I offer, awaiting her input.
"Okay." She starts. "I think that, this has nothing to do with psychology."
Hm?
"You say things like our mind is playing tricks on us, and... it's a healthy part of life to be curious, and, things like that. But, who are you trying to convince?" She questions. "I think it's all just excuses. You said that we both enjoyed the kiss. Personally, I really think that's all that matters. There's no reason to get behind the science of it, but if you ask me I think it's chemistry."
Chemistry...? Between... me and-
"Have you SEEN the way you act around me? Every muscle in your body tenses when we touch. Every pigment in your cheek bones becomes a florescent red. Melanie... you're attracted to a girl!" She smiles. "And you just can't admit it to yourself!"
"You mean, admit that, according to what you think, that I'm..."
"...just say it." She pleads.
"I can't." I begin to cry. "I'm NOT. I..."
She realized she may have pressured me into this state, and wraps her arms around me.
...or, maybe she just wanted to comfort me. In her terms.
"Mel, I'm so sorry. Maybe it's too soon to be talking about this. I should have known better..."
"But you're right, Dani." I cry. "I can't say it, but I know you're right. I just need to know... are you?"
There's a pause.
"I think, maybe, I'm bicurious." She begins, still holding me in her arms. "And, I think, maybe, those curiosities haven't reached their limits."
And that was Dani's hidden way of saying she wants to continue to be with me. Too.
"You should get some sleep." She suggests. "If you're not gonna eat, then you have to conserve as much energy as you can."
We lay back down, this time laying under the covers.
After she's settled comfortably in bed, I lean over and plant a kiss on her mouth.
"...goodnight Dani." I blush.
It's true... you can tell if someone likes you just by their body language. Though I couldn't see her facial reaction, her hand had tensed and her head fell to the side facing me. Her breathing was heavier then normal, and her eyes slightly flickered for a few seconds.
We were undeniably falling for each other.