Item #12: Experience a Wonder of the World (besides Gibbs)
A/N: I haven't said this in a while, so THANK YOU SO MUCH to all of my reviewers, your feedback really means a lot to me. Keep it up, please!
Disclaimer: Not mine.
"You think this will actually work?" One voice whispered while bending over the product of two mischief-intended brains.
"Of course it will, Timmy. We made it."
"Good morning, Tony," Ziva said brightly as her partner entered the bullpen. The team had been assigned to an earlier shift than normal, thus having to arrive at the office at 0500 rather than 0700 hours.
"Hmph. This barely qualifies as morning," he grumped, flopping down into his chair and leaning his head back. He was dressed in his usual button-down shirt, coat, pants, and tie, but there was something distinctly disgruntled about his appearance. It may have been the button missed when putting on his shirt, or the very messy hair that was typically the most groomed part of him.
Ziva just chuckled softly and returned to surfing on her computer. McGee entered just then, looking a little less like he had just rolled out of bed, though with faint circles under his eyes. What Ziva noticed, and Tony failed to, was that there was all a glint of something very much awake and secretive in those green irises.
"This isn't a trick of yours, is it, McPrankster?" For the past week, the two male agents had been in an extensive prank war, refusing to be outdone by the other.
"Come on, we got a dead petty officer down at the docks," Gibbs said, walking past them towards the elevator. Tony groaned, glared suspiciously at the McGeek, but joined the team in their exit, pausing only long enough to snatch a breath mint and comb out of his desk; he couldn't have anyone thinking of him as a complete slob.
"I think you would look great in that one," Tony said quietly, his breath tickling her bare neck, whilst pointing to a bikini on the woman's magazine. She was lounging in a chair on her yacht, waiting to give the investigating team her witness's statement.
"Umph," she said disgustedly, pulling away from him. "Take three steps back." Confused, he complied. He became aware of wetness under his arms, even though he had only been outside in the 70 degree weather for less than twenty minutes. The NCIS windbreakers were black, but he usually didn't sweat this easily.
Once returning to the office, he rid himself of his current sweat-stained shirt and pulled on the spare in his desk. Upon hearing a laugh from across the aisle, he glanced over and saw Ziva grinning at her computer screen.
"What? Is it McGee dancing the Bamba?" He hurried over to look over her shoulder, but she quickly closed the window.
"Go away, Tony," she shooed him from her. He sneered at her, but left the bullpen for Autopsy.
"Dear God, Anthony, I can smell you even over our poor petty officer! Are you out of both breath freshener and deodorant?" Ducky reprimanded half a minute after Tony entered the land of the frozen and freshly minced dead.
"Sorry, I don't know why, it has just been this problem I have been having today." Tony took a step away from the body, pulling his jacket closer around his body to hide the sweat stains that he felt forming abnormally quickly.
"Did you consume an excess amount of fiber last night?"
"No…" Tony replied uncertainly.
"Any digestion problems? Are you having trouble urinating?"
"No."
"Then you either have a rare disease the name of which I seem to be forgetting…"The medical examiner glanced down at the corpse, seemingly asking for help. "Ah, oh well. Or, maybe…OH." If Tony's life had been a cartoon, a light bulb would have just popped up over Ducky's head. "Clever. Very mischievous. Anyways, I do not have anything of substantial importance to your case at this moment, so unless you would like to watch me complete this autopsy…"
"I'll go catch up with Abby," Tony left the room with a confused look, for none of Ducky's cryptic and half-complete musings had resolved his current problem. Ducky just chuckled to himself and possibly to the dead man.
Both McGee and Abby were in her lab, working dutifully on some piece of electronic evidence. Her music played from her speakers, though not quite as loud as usual, probably for the sake of McGee's ears.
"Do you need something, Tony?" The forensic scientist inquired without turning around. In a fit of frustration, Tony let out an annoyed sound and slapped his hands on his thighs.
"Do I really smell that bad?" He demanded of them. The two glanced at each other, and turned to face him simultaneously. Abby was grinning like the Cheshire cat and even McGee was fighting laugher, a smile, or both.
"Would you like a breath mint, Tony?" McGee held up a small parcel exactly matching the one Tony had snatched from his own desk early that morning. Suddenly, the hint Ducky had dropped made sense.
"You did not." Of course they did. Who else would have the brains our equipment needed to concoct a drug that would not only put his sweat glands on overdrive and worsened his morning breath, but could be disguised in a breath mint? "I hate you. Both of you."
McGee kept right on smiling. "Revenge is beautiful, is it not, Tony? I think I win."
At the end of the day, even after being unsuccessful at procuring the antidote, Tony had to admit that McGee had done exceptionally well. It was, he grudgingly had to confess, a very good prank, and at this moment he couldn't come up with a trick that would satisfactorily pay the agent back.
A Wonder of the World it would be if Tony was forced to admit defeat in a prank war, especially to McGee. Maybe, just maybe, he could catch McGee singing…that would be priceless blackmail, he thought.
A/N: I am sorry that it has been so long since I updated, I took a hiatus over the holidays. And yeah, this one shot doesn't quite fit with the prompt, but my creative ideas had hit rock bottom.
I hope you found this update at least minutely amusing, or at least appreciated McGee's larger role. The next couple of updates might be kind of short, (like, less than 1,000 words, but not drabbles), if that is okay with you readers.
Thanks for reading, and please review!