I do not own OHSHC
I jolt awake, nearly flinging myself out of the king sized bed as I reach for Hikaru. My hands grasp air and it takes minutes before I am calm enough to realize I'm in a warm bed, not on a snow-covered hill. There is no snow, no cold, just me in my sweat soaked pajamas that now cling to my shivering form.
It was like being back there, watching it happen all over again. Hikaru's laughter, his smile, and then suddenly they was gone. In its replacement were mangled skis and an empty nothingness.
I sit up slowly, a hand coming to rest on my head as I try to regain control of my rapid breathing and racing heart. Unwanted tears roll down my cheeks at the horrible memory.
My eyes clench shut, trying to erase the images the nightmare had left behind. But still, I could see the blood and hear the final, ragged breaths of my older brother before he finally succumbed to his injures, the injuries that had been my fault.
I had dared him, I had challenged him to race me down the hardest trail, and being a Hitachiin he couldn't refuse. I should have stopped the bet. I could see the uncertainty that had clouded his determined eyes.
The sheets are peeled from my body as I stand, slithering into the bathroom to splash cold water onto my heated face. I look up, and an unknown boy stares back at me, his tear-stained, tired face mirroring mine. His lips twitch upward and as I lift my hand to toy with my hair, so does he.
"Good morning, Hikaru." I smile, now looking at my twin, his hair parted to the right. And, for a second I'm able to forget that it is just me staring at a mirror image of myself, that that boy in the mirror is not Hikaru.
A familiar, uncomfortable churning begins in my stomach. My smile falls, and I have to tear my eyes away from the mirror.
"Hitachiin-sama, time to wake up." Two knocks on the door cause my head to snap to attention.
"I don't feel well," I shout back as a maid pokes her head through the bedroom door. "I'm not going to school today."
It isn't until hours later that I'm finally able to leave the house. By now, school had been dismissed and the host club was probably getting along fine without me. Instead, I find myself going to the one place I do not want to be, walking through the many lines of headstones and towards the one I knew all too well.
It's not until I stop in front of it that the weight of this morning and yesterday's events fall upon my shoulders much harder than they had before. It was like I was suffocating, but it wasn't sadness, it was a new feeling. One that I'd never felt this strongly towards my brother before.
"I hate you," I whisper, my words unsure and shaky. I can taste the bitter poison in those three words as they leave my lips.
Never before had I spoken these words to my brother and yet now here I was speaking them over his final resting place. It should have been easier to say than this. He was 'asleep', but it didn't matter whether he was awake or not. Those three words had always been taboo.
My eyes remain focused on Hikaru's headstone, staring down from above at the name. Below it sat a wilted rose, a reminder that other people who were not me had also loved Hikaru. My fists clench into a white-knuckled grip on the new rose I had brought to offer. The thorns dig deep into my hand.
"I hate you." They came out louder this time, with more conviction than the last. Hot tears burn the back of my eyes, but I refuse to cry, not anymore.
"I mean every word, Hikaru. I really do hate you!" My legs fold beneath me, bringing me to kneel on the ground. "I'm tired, I can't eat, and now you're making me deal with the devil himself. What more could you do to me?"
As expected, there's no response.
"I'm sure this is just another joke to you, but I'm not laughing, Hikaru. I…don't want to play anymore, not if it's going to be like this."
"So you're giving up?" a new voice asked.
I spin around, my neck nearly snapping at the speed. Standing there before me was a small blonde, in his hands he held a single flower and a bottle of maple syrup. Beside him a taller man stood, his face impassive.
He noticed me staring at the bottle and raised it, his eyes shining with joy.
"Hika-chan once told me he liked maple syrup. So Takashi and I got him a bottle!" the boy announced.
I chuckle softly. Once more I fall into my act. I stand and survey the bottle. "You even knew our favorite brand!"
"I'm glad!" Hunny smiled. "I was a little worried Usa-chan picked out the wrong brand."
"No, it's right! He'll love it!" I gush.
I falter when I see Hunny's face take on a more mature tone. You can't hide anything from him. It's like he always knew. He had to be one of the wisest members of the host club, besides Mori at least. But, then again we rarely ever heard him speak.
"You're hurt," Mori's voice rumbled.
I look down at my hand with boredom. For some reason the injury didn't bother me, and I found that I couldn't even feel the sting of the thorns pressing into my skin, but still my grip on the flower loosens.
"Oh," I say, looking down at my injured hand in embarrassment.
"Kao-chan, we got the clue for you," Hunny says.
I look up, suddenly interested.
His voice was quieter than normal, the only time I heard it reach this point was when he went into his dark mode. He had such a saddened look on his face though, that I doubted that was the case this time.
"Kyou-chan only wanted you to have fun. He doesn't show it, but I know that's what he wanted, everyone wants it, Kao-chan…"
I remain silent, staring ahead at nothing. Mori shifts, moving into my line of vision, causing me to look up at him.
"Kao-chan…" a small hand reaches for mine, inserting itself inside my larger one. "Please come to the dance tomorrow night."
I pull away, and the blonde boy recoils, moving to clutch onto the bottle of syrup. A larger hand holds something out for me, and after a moment, I take it.
"I hope you feel better soon, Kao-chan. We're all cheering for you to win." Hunny passes by me and kneels down, gingerly placing the bottle of syrup next to Hikaru's stone. Mori nods, and together the two turn and leave.
Finally, I'm able to turn to the note in my hand.
'Kyouya-sempai hates being woken up. The real prize is waiting for you in the horse's mouth.'
I look down at the note in awe. After all this I still didn't have the tape he promised me.
"Cheater," I grumble. "But, I'm not going to give up yet, Hikaru."
With everyone cheering for me, there's no way I was going to let myself give up and lose. Tomorrow that tape would be in my hands and hopefully, Hikaru wouldn't pull anymore tricks.
Ah~ I don't really like this chapter. It's short and I couldn't get it out of this depressing mood even if I tried, and I did try hard. That was probably half the reason it was so late. Everytime I looked at it I wanted to delete it. Anyway, I'm honestly sorry about the long wait. It's been months hasn't it? I promise to be a bit more regular in updating before the summer break is over. After that college will probably upset the schedule.
On another note~ Hunny and Mori-sempai cheated didn't they? But it was for the better. Actually...everyone's cheating. Poor Kaoru... Anyway, I wonder if you know where the next clue is, even if my clues are vague. Guess in the reviews. I'm curious as to where you think it is. It's pretty obvious though isn't it? Maybe I'll make the next clue really hard and whoever guesses gets a prize or something.