KUCHIKI RUKIA
It's cold tonight. My hands are shaking and chills are racing up and down my spine. I hope you're doing fine.
I'm still out of breath. You managed to catch up with me, and to corner me at that. I'm glad. I'm glad that your skills have not dulled, instead they have improved since I last saw you. Without me, you have grown considerably.
Coming here tonight was a mistake. I did not wish to do so – my heart did otherwise.
As though in some sort of trance, my body simply moved through places. Jumping from buildings, darting through alleys, and flying through the night sky, all of which I did simply just to reach you. It's silly, don't you think?
When I reached that post just outside your window, I took over again. I knew where I was. I stood for a moment. I contemplated deeply and for quite some time. I decided to leave, but my feet were rooted on their spot.
My body felt like lead. It took extra effort to simply move my head away from where I knew you were. I could not look away for my heart refused to do so. Once again, I was in a trance, and before I knew it, I moved again.
When I entered your room, I felt at home. Your room was the only place I could ever call home. Only here did I ever feel any warmth and security. Your family treated me as their own and I am eternally grateful for that. You have always welcomed me, even through your feigned annoyance.
The smell of your cologne filled my lungs. The things that lay about in your room have not moved since I've seen them last. The warmth of some invisible light lingered about the place, relaxing my muscles and calming my heart. I looked around to simply take in this brief moment of nostalgia, just enough to make a memory. Yet, something felt odd. Something was amiss.
Your closet door was ajar. I took a peek and saw that my bed was still there along with some clothes. My heart twisted. I bit my lip in frustration.
Why?
Why had you not rid yourself of those vile things?
What were you thinking keeping that door ajar?
When was the last time you cleaned out that forsaken closet? (Did you even think about cleaning it out?)
Who were you waiting for?
I could not believe it. After all this time, the mere fact that I disappeared should have struck that thick skull of yours that I was not coming back. Have you not figured it out by now? I had no intention of coming back. It was all for your sake! You fool! You never learn until something horrible happens. Still you hoped. That idiotic notion of even considering that I'd come back burned fiercely at the back of your mind. I could not believe it!
My thoughts were racing. My heart was beating wildly in its cage. I still cannot comprehend.
How did you know that I would come back?
How? After all the distance I tried to put between us, all the times I shoved you away, and all the days that have passed and still no sign of me, you still hung on to that thought that I would return? Fool!
Thinking back on all that, just makes the air colder. The streets are all dimly lit but a gradient of orange to blue is filling the sky. It's almost morning and I'm still here. I should really get going but my feet refuse to move any faster.
With all that has happened, it's funny to even think about all this, right? It's laughable that I'm trying to communicate with you, even though now there would be no chance for your reply.
Fool. I'm the fool who turned her back on herself to face you.
Ties have been severed. Bridges have burned. You have nothing more to say, right, Ichigo?