They rode home in complete silence. She was still incapable of putting together a sentence. The shock had been like a punch in the stomach. Similar to the feeling she'd gotten when he'd confessed he was engaged, except this felt like more of a kick to the stomach than just a punch.
She could feel the tension and she hated it, but every time she went to say something, she went blank again and simply continued focused on the road, wanting to drive.
"Pull over."
"What?" She stated as she was snapped back into reality.
"Pull over." She pulled over to the side of the road and noticed for the first time that it hadn't snowed all day. Not since yesterday afternoon. And suddenly, it had begun to flurry. Logan opened the door and stepped out of the car. He walked with his hands tucked in his pockets, and his head down to protect against the wind.
"Logan, wait!" She jumped out and followed him, realizing they were near the cliff. She fell in line with him as they walked in silence for a few moments.
"Say something Ronnie, for the love of God, say something." She looked down and sighed loudly, trying to think of what she wanted to say.
"I… I don't know where this puts us."
"What do you mean?" He stopped, and looked over at her. The snow was now falling heavier, and beginning to get on his lashes. She watched them and then looked into his desperate eyes.
"I mean that I… I don't know what to say to you. You come here saying you're engaged. You just show up, after three years of being gone and it's like all these things are happening in my life, all these feelings at once, and now you throw this bombshell on me and I… I don't know!"
"Do you love me?"
She stood in stunned silence as he expected an answer.
"Logan… I… we've been friends for a long time…."
"That wasn't what I asked. I said do you love me?"
"I… I've always loved you, you know that…."
"That's not what I mean either. Veronica, you and I have been closer than anyone else in my life. You know things about me I would never tell anyone. Every time I'm around you there are these feelings, this panic that runs through me that you will never see me the way I see you. I can't live with that."
"Logan…."
"Now, I know you feel something for me. I know you do, and I know it's deeper than friendship. Roonie, my first night with any woman was with you, after prom. I cherish that memory more than you know. What I am realizing is… I have been in love with you ever since. I know that you have had failed relationships, but I have never given you reason to doubt me. I need to know if what I'm feeling is in vain."
He grabbed her face in his gloved hands and breathed out, the warm smoke warming her skin.
"I know you loved me once. I wasn't ready then. We always promised each other that if nothing else, we would have each other. I need to know if that still stands."
She stood in silence, simply staring into his eyes, hers now filling with tears.
"I'm going to kiss you." He stated simply as she felt the electricity begin to build throughout her body. She felt the flutter of butterflies that she was constantly fighting in her stomach. "If you don't want me to, just tell me to stop." He looked at her carefully, and she simply stared at him, no answer visible in her face.
He leaned in closer, slowly, giving her time to change her mind. She felt her body tense as he stood right before her. Then she closed her eyes, and felt his cool lips upon hers. She sighed, letting the tension slip as the familiar taste of his mouth warmed her. She smiled as she tasted the melting snowflakes on his lips. She hadn't wanted to admit it to herself. All these years she could never commit. Now, she knew why. She'd always been in love with another man. Logan Echolls.