Chapter Title: Rape
Pairings: One-sided Akito/Miku
Warnings: Slightly graphic rape, violence, sexual assault, mental dissorders, and other such dasterdly things of Akito

His hands were all over me, nails dragging down over my shoulders, down my bare back, leaving bloody trails behind them as his mouth clamped down on the side of my neck, biting, hard.

I screamed as he thrust into me, but he pinned me against the sheets, my wrists held tight above my head in a bruising grip.

The smell of cinnamon was so thick it was almost suffocating.

It went on forever, and every time I tried to sink away into my mind, escape somehow, he brought me back, painfully, with a bit or a smack or vicious thrust.

I woke up panting, my breathing too fast and panicked. I pushed away the nightmare as best I could, still laying on the floor, as I steadied my breathing and calmed myself down. I must have been locked up in my room for at least a day and half, week, defeated, dead, when they started banging down my door.

I paid no mind. I had no mind. Mindlessly, I stared at the floor, waiting for my body to succomb to sleep once more. I knew I should be hungry, but I couldn't feel anything. I felt like a china doll. Mad of glass, and hollow on the inside.

I don't know how long it took them to bash down my bedroom door, but when they did, I certainly didn't expect to see Akito walk in, carrying a tray of food and a bottle of meds. But then, if I tried to remember, I could remember when I was younger, and had gotten sick, he would always bring me my food.

He set the tray down on my armiour, and crouched beside me. I continued to stare at the wall. He brushed the hair that had fallen into my face. I didn't respond. I just continued to stare at the wall.

"Miku? How are you feeling?" He asked, voice low, as if afraid to startle me. He sounded concerned, and worried. "Ha'ri told me what happened."

I continued to stare at the wall, ignoring the inkling feeling of another betrayal.

Akito tenderly cupped my face in one hand, turning my eyes to face him. He looked worried, almost scared, as he leaned over me, his other hand propping himself up above me. "Look at me, Miku. Please." He almost sounded like he was begging.

I don't know why, probably some ingrained sense of obedience, but I turned my face to him, looking at him.

"He hurt you. I'm so sorry he hurt you. I knew. I'm sorry I let him hurt you," There was a real apology, and for a minute, I realized that Akito really did love his animals, and he tried. Yeah, he showed it in a very fucked up manner, but that didn't change the fact that he still loved us.

I forced a small smile. I don't know why I did, but I felt vaguely like I owed it too him.

He laughed and sobbed at the same time, a tear slipping down his cheek, and then he said something that changed everything. "Why can't you love me, Miku? I won't hurt you. I love you. I'll never let anything hurt you again."

And he kissed me, tongue shoving down my thraot, lips and teeth like he was going to eat his way inside.

He was psychotic. Truly, truly psychotic.

I pushed at his chest, weakly. I couldn't breathe. I was panicking. But he was too strong, as his upper body pinned me down, a hand rubbing up and down my waist.

I struggled, screamed, and that hand that had been oh-so-gently rubbing my waist took a grip in my hair, pulling it back painfully, exposing my neck. He locked his lips over my pulse, and sucked. I writhed against his grip, and suddenly, he was off. Gone. I could breathe. I could run.

I didn't look to see who had saved me. I scrambled to my feet, my body relying on the only thing that made sense anymore – my basic fight or flight instincts, and I fled. I ran as fast as I could, stumbling and tripping down the stairs, out the door, and down the street.

I don't know how long I ran, but by the time I had slowed to a walk, it was raining, hard, and I was coughing.

I fumbled at my jeans pockets, and thankfully found my emergency inhaler.

I stopped, thoroughly soaked, at the same playground that had played in my nightmares and in my dreams for so many years. I used my inhaler, and then put it back in my pocket, feeling a slight buzz as the muscles in my throat relaxed.

I stared at the playground, swings creaking in the snow, rain and wind, and felt incredibly alone.

I sat down on one of the benches, and curled my knees up to my chest, and held myself, terrified.

What now? I asked myself.

I don't know.

X.x.X.x.X

I must have sat at that park, shivering and scared, for hours before they found in me in my zodiac form of the coyote. It was a flashlight, bouncing up and down in the dark, right in front of me.

I shielded my eyes with one paw, trying to see past the light and the heavy rain to the person holding the flash light.

Whoever it was pocketed the flashlight and crouched in front of me. "Miku? My name's Shigure. Are you okay?"

Numbly, I shook my small, furry head, teeth chattering.

He frowned, taking off his jacket. He wrappedit around me, then picked me up. I let him, snuggling into his chest, thankful for the warmth. He smelled incredibly familiar. He smelled safe, and he was so warm.

"I'm one of Hatori's friends. I'm going to take you to the winter vacation house, okay?"

I whimpered slightly, staring at his shirt which was already soaked from just minutes of the rain as he carried me out of the park. He took me to a car, laying me down in the back seat, my head on someone's lap. I nuzzled closer, curling my tail around me.

Then very, very familiar hands started to pet me, rubbing through my fur, looking for wounds.

I growled in protest, and the hands stilled.

"Miku? Are you alright?" Hatori asked. I snuggled closer, knowing he would push me away soon, soaking up what little of the contact I could while it lasted. I breathed deeply in the smell of him, and it made my heart break all over again. "Miku?" He asked, trying to look into my eyes.

"I'm fine," I mumbled, voice strained.

He held me tight, then, much to my surprise. "I'm sorry." He whispered, tucking his face into the fur at my neck. I shivered at the sensation. "I got scared. I'm so sorry I ran away. This is all my fault."

I moved to look up at his face. "I forgive you." I said softly, rubbing my cheek against the side of his face. He smiled, and I felt the pieces begin to come back together, as my heart began to heal.