PHASE TWENTY-ONE: Token of Water
C.E 79 Orb (Present Day)
The sound of the footsteps were amazingly loud in Athrun's ears as he walked towards the hangar of Morganroete. He kept his head low, frowning at his feet as he walked. He might as well be drifting with the pace he was working with, the steps barely an inch from each other as they parted to move forwards. The corridors were empty for a change, perhaps due to the ungodly hours in which he was moving. He had confined himself in his dorm, effectively keeping away from both Shinn and Kira as he tried to get into terms with what had happened.
On the first day, he was left alone.
On the second day, Kira and Lacus were worried.
On the third day, he had been forced out by Cagalli and resorted to helping out wherever possible, save for the hangar… much to her dismay.
He knew what she was trying to do, of course. Cagalli was never one to tread tenderly around the abyss of the unknown – she was the type to jump head-first into it. He knew she wanted him to go into the hangar of Morganroete, to climb into the cockpit of the new Justice and familiarize himself with a mobile suit again. And he knew how much he had irritated her when he helped out with almost anything except that.
Here he was, a killer machine, a Coordinator experiment who could kill his best friend and feel satisfied, and he had been given a mobile suit to pilot. Not just given… Two had died in the process of transferring the machine to him.
He killed even when he did not want to be killed.
Athrun stopped walking and leaned against the wall, pinching the bridge of his nose as he did so. What was wrong with him? Such dark, pessimistic thoughts had never been that controlling over his mind. He thought he had controlled himself as he watched the Freedom spin in the air, an arm around Cagalli as they talked and laughed. Where did that side of him disappear to?
Athrun wished he knew.
Those days when he would meet Kira and work together, laugh at each other's mistakes and jokes… Those days when he would spend time with Lacus, discussing lightly of trivial matters and maintaining her Haros even though Kira could do them as well as he could… Those days when he would lie on the bed, Cagalli resting on his chest, and feel perfectly at ease…
He wanted that part of him back. And wondered what he needed to do in order to gain it again.
Pushing himself back to his feet, Athrun focused his eyes to the door that was located a hundred metres in front of him, eyeing it determinedly. He cast his thoughts back to when he had been in Phaedra's Base. He had promised himself, at that time, at that moment of utter desperation, that he would marry Cagalli should he escape. But perhaps escaping was not enough. No, he knew it wasn't enough. Something had changed within him, perhaps something far deeper than just his desire to defeat Kira once again. Something that he couldn't afford to let go. And he certainly was not going to get it back by loitering around avoiding the hard reality in front of him. Thinking that, Athrun wanted to laugh, but his mood was as black as the Destroy Gundam. He moved his right foot, and continued to walk.
Sometimes, Athrun wondered if Kojiro Murdoch ever got any sleep despite the older man's incessant rants about how the pilots weren't getting enough rest. A quick glance to the watch in the hangar told him that it was past 3AM, but there the engineer was, still ordering his workers and leafing through the papers in his hand. He seemed to have form a sort of sixth sense with the hangars he worked in as well, able to detect even the slightest of changes, for he turned as Athrun approached and raised his hand. "Didn't think you'd come," he remarked easily. Athrun nearly winced at how blunt the technician's words were. "Come over here, there are a few things I want to show you," Murdoch waved, turning to walk straight to the towering Gundam located in the far corner of the hangar.
He caught up with the engineer easily, moving in-step as until they reached the mobile suit. Almost resignedly, Athrun looked up at the grey and silver mobile suit… the Divine Justice.
"At first we were wondering how the hell that mobile suit could carry the Justice all the way here. But the lack of weapons and lower-half of the body lightened the burden. What's most interesting was the flyer pack it equipped… it's compatible with your mobile suit," Murdoch began, gesturing to the flyer that was already attached to the back of the Justice, forming an X shape that looked like wings on the back. Athrun merely nodded at the comment – he wasn't surprised that the flyer was compatible with both the Justice and the Imperial. It probably would be even for the Freedom, if the Freedom could equip such a thing. The mobile suits had been developed by the same person, after all. "The flyer comes under the name of Fatum-02. The spread of the wings, I suppose you can call it, can greatly vary how many weapons you want to carry, or how much manoeuvrability you wish to have. It uses the U-HiMAT system, just like the Freedom."
Athrun raised his eyebrows. He was, in truth, impressed. The Freedom's ability in movement was due to the wings on its back – the DRAGOONs that could be stretched out and folded, giving it the high-mobility aerial movement. He hadn't expected the same to be achieved with only four wings on the Justice's back. "What about the power plant?"
"The same Hyper-Deuterion nuclear reactor. Guess they had a purpose behind bringing you on the Renegade those weeks ago, huh?" Murdoch said, grinning slightly despite himself. "This machine has been installed with the same antimatter hyper-propulsion catalyst system as the Freedom's. But it has a small extra which I'd want you to try out after this," he said, sliding an eye to Athrun. Judging from the look on his face, Athrun could see that the engineer was eager to see the machine in action.
"What's the new system?" Athrun asked.
"A sort of power enhancer, by the looks of it. It seems as if there are emitters installed along with the catalyst system that pretty much controls the whole thing. The Freedom doesn't have it," he remarked, clearly interested. "We haven't been able to look that well yet, but it's worth trying to copy the system. I've sent the data to Heliopolis. Ms. Simmons would make good use of it," he said smoothly.
That was all he needed to know. Athrun thanked the elder engineer and waited for him to turn away and leave before grasping the lever of the Justice. Before allowing the lever to pull him up, he gave one long look at the machine in front of him. It nearly looked the same as the old Infinite Justice... almost identical, he would say. There were the two cannons on the shoulders... the weapons installed on the hips and legs... The headpiece, which nearly looked majestic as, still as it was, it seemed to have a perfect view of the hangar. A strange feeling niggled inside him – the feeling he always get when facing a new Gundam. It felt like... hope.
The door to the Justice opened easily and Athrun climbed inside, instantly at home with the smell of metal and leather that greeted him. He settled in his chair and activated the machine, almost unnerved by how he seem to already know where everything was located within seconds of climbing into the cockpit.
GENERATION UNSUBDUED NUCLEAR DRIVE ASSAULT MODULE
G.U.N.D.A.M Complex
The first thing he checked was the weapons. Power output was important, but Athrun knew that he would have better judgement of that when he actually flew the mobile suit. From the list of armaments presented to him, one in particular stood out as being different from the ones he was used to – an anti-ship sword named the 'Force Stealer'. Bringing the details up, Athrun realised with surprise that it was sonic-enhanced, able to emit sonic frequencies with the blade to easily cut through anything. It was a flaw of the old Infinite Justice's that Athrun realised he had: The old Justice had no means of being able to easily take down enemy ships, unlike the Freedom. Multiple attacks would still bring ships down, but that was time-consuming... and to Athrun, who preferred close-quarters combat, it was definitely a hassle. The only way he had managed to bring the Minerva down during the previous war was by dispatching his Fatum-01 flyer, sending it through the main thrusters.
His fingers moved across the keyboard, adjusting the calibrations, playing with the visuals, setting shortcuts and modifying the OS. The work was familiar... soothing, in a way. As he worked, he made a mental note to check the headpiece of the Justice later to fine-tune the external cameras.
Athrun had just been able to see the crack of the light of dawn beginning to touch the open hangar when he finally decided that he would take the Justice out. He strapped himself into the seat as he notified Chief Murdoch from the cockpit of the Justice. It seemed as if the engineer had just been waiting for the green light, for in a matter of a few minutes, the Justice was already moving to the catapult system.
"Justice, standby. Initiating the launch sequence…"
He was mirroring what Kira had done three days ago. Merely taking the mobile suit for a ride. Only this time, he highly doubted that any long-lost friends would appear in damaged mobile suits... No, most of his comrades had lost their lives during the war.
"Justice, please launch!"
There was no hesitation. "Athrun Zala. Justice. Launching!"
The momentum of being thrown forward was still overwhelming, albeit familiar. The Justice turned from silver and grey to a shade of red, black and gold as Athrun activated the Phase Shift armour, bursting out into the skies that was just beginning to lighten, unlike Kira who launched when the skies were turning dark. The Justice soared, the majestic mobile suit turning smoothly, quicker and more fluidly than Athrun ever remembered. For a moment, just for a moment, he felt truly free. He pushed the speed higher, the mobile suit still moving swiftly like a robin on a spring morning. The mobility of the machine, especially for one located on Earth, was astounding. He turned, first somersaulting forwards, then moving backwards, gliding through the air until he thought of nothing else but the feeling of freedom that he was experiencing.
Then, he hit the catalyst system.
Unknown to Athrun, the power enhancer activated itself along with the catalyst system, the emitters releasing what seemed to be gold and white particles on the Justice's back. The Justice sped, a speed he had never truly experienced before, and he took out his beam saber, practicing in the air like a master samurai warrior's performing rituals. It was an unnatural feeling.
Thank you, Hikari... Thank you, Ken...
When the catalyst was used up and the translucent wings behind his back disappeared, Athrun turned and returned to Morganroete's hangar, landing easily after years of experience. He could feel the adrenalin running through his fingers and shook his head, amazed more than anything else. Powering off the Justice, Athrun opened the cockpit and lowered himself, his eyes widening as he saw Kira, Lacus and Cagalli waiting for him below. When had they arrived? Haro was bouncing, seemingly excited more than he was as it zoomed across the hangar. As soon as his feet touched the ground, Cagalli was in his arms, the golden orbs shining with happiness. "Athrun! That was amazing!" she laughed, shaking her head.
"That was some flying," Murdoch's voice joined them. Athrun turned. "How did it feel?"
He couldn't find the words to say. "It was great," Athrun managed. Murdoch merely chuckled and walked away. He would speak to the Coordinator later.
Turning his attention back to the three, Athrun couldn't help but smile. Lacus clapped her hands together. "You flew beautifully up there, Athrun! And those wings at the back of the Justice..."
"Wings?" Athrun echoed.
Kira nodded. "Murdoch-san told me about the power enhancer. I think that was it. It's controlling the energy output of the catalyst system," he said.
"It looked like the Justice had wings for a moment. Golden wings," Cagalli interrupted, shaking her head with wonder.
Athrun arched an eyebrow. Golden wings, huh? He would very much like that, for the colour reminded him of a person dear to him.
"They were wings," Lacus said, her voice gentle. Athrun looked at her. "Wings of Hope."
C.E 79 Artemis – Renegade (Present Day)
At last, they have reached Artemis! Genei was wondering how much longer he could stand sitting around and waiting for some action. He was dying to use the Gamma Glipheptin. The two pills felt as if they weighed as much as his Advocate, forever resting in his chest pocket, hidden from view. He had seen Tierra a few hours ago after the other Extended had successfully managed to keep away from him since their last conversation. All Tierra said was that he would fight until the end of the war, but to Genei, that was answer enough. Tierra would take the pills. Because Tierra knew, just like Genei knew. They were machines designed to kill. After the war, they would be disposed of, especially with the degradation of their bodies setting in. What better way could they die than to die in the middle of the battlefield? The Gamma Glipheptin would kill him, and he was perfectly content with that because before taking his life, the drug will give him power first. Power he sorely needed.
Goodness knows, he was bored.
Still, being on Artemis was not much fun, either. The place was full with Earth Alliance soldiers, not even one of them trusting anyone on the Renegade except for Captain Tienn, it seemed. Genei paid them no mind. Human politics were among the least of his interests and concerns, and he did not wish to learn anything regarding the matter either. He would focus his thoughts purely on the battle that was coming up.
The door slid open behind him and he turned, raising his eyebrows as the blonde-haired, blue-eyed Captain stepped in. And he had just been thinking of the fiend as well. It seemed as though the man had been looking for him, for he did not excuse himself for interrupting Genei's private time alone. Not that Genei was in a private place... the viewing deck of the Renegade was perfectly open for anyone. Still, Genei arched an eyebrow, silently asking the question.
Sethe walked over until he was standing beside the Extended. "Artemis has been prepared. Estimated time of firing will be in 120 hours. Be ready."
He snorted. "I've always been ready. Tell that to those Earth Alliance idiots who can't move fast enough," Genei snapped. 120 hours? He could die of degradation before that.
Sethe's lips twitched slightly, though Genei could not tell whether it was from amusement or annoyance. Nor did he care to know. "I see you are planning to use the Gamma Glipheptin."
Oops. "...I don't intend on going back on it," Genei said dismissively.
The other regarded him coolly, but finally nodded. "I won't stop you."
That was unexpected. "...I see."
Genei had never truly known anything about Captain Sethe Tienn, despite being on the Renegade with him even before the Commander – or traitor, whatever – came aboard with Seorin, Aya and Liesel. There had only been two individuals whom he could truly tolerate to be around with for an extended amount of time, which were Liesel and Tierra. Nobody else. So he was both surprised and irritated when Sethe moved to sit by one of the seats of the viewing deck, his piercing blue eyes on Genei.
"I do not intend to escape from this battlefield with my life as well."
Genei had often tagged people as many things, but he would never have tagged Captain Sethe Tienn as a suicidal man. "What do you mean?"
"We're both nothing but pawns and weapons of war, Genei. You may be an Extended. But me... I am a clone," he said softly. Genei felt a small chill run down his spine. The way Sethe spoke was almost as if there was someone else speaking behind him. A voice that didn't belong to Sethe at all, but another different individual entirely. It was unnerving. Genei said nothing. "The Commander's real name was Daisuke Shen. A scientist in the colony of Mendel. He was, quite simply, the one responsible for cloning me after an arrogant, ambitious man named Al Da Flaga," he said quietly.
Why the heck was the Captain telling him all this? He didn't even want to know.
"As you know, clones are... We have no past, no future. No self. No identity. Merely copies of others, working for one goal. That is what we are. But what is interesting is that Daisuke is also responsible for another creation... a creation you have come to know as Kira Yamato, pilot of the Freedom."
Now he had his attention.
"Kira Yamato is the one and only Ultimate Coordinator."
The silence that hung in the air was suffocating, but Genei's mind was whirling far too quickly to understand.
Sethe smiled. "A child created without faults or anomalies usually caused by the womb of a mother – that is Kira Yamato. He is the next step of mankind, the next generation, the symbol of hope as the one who can be the bridge between Naturals and Coordinators... the Coordinator to coordinate our way to work together with the Coordinators. That is what he is. What he has been made to be. And my one true goal is truly to eliminate this specimen named Kira Yamato," Sethe said, rising to his feet. He waited, but if he had been expecting an answer from Genei, he was disappointed, for Genei provided none. The silence stood awkward between them and eventually, without another word from either of them, Sethe left.
As soon as the door slid shut behind him, Genei sat on the seat that had been occupied previously by the Captain. Thoughts were running through his mind. He was an Extended. A weapon. The most lethal, the most intelligent, the most deadly weapon created by mankind before: a weapon with a conscience. On the other hand, Kira Yamato was... everything a human wanted to be. One created without flaws. The Ultimate Coordinator.
If Genei loathed the Freedom before, he did not know what words could be used to explain his feelings now.
C.E 79 Heliopolis (Present Day)
The soldiers, a mix from Orb, Heliopolis and ZAFT, all saluted as the Archangel docked into the Morganroete hangar. Yzak Joule stood impeccably straight, bearing the mark of a true soldier as the door of the Archangel opened, revealing Cagalli, Murrue and Mu who stepped down from the large ship, followed by Athrun, Kira and Lacus. Dearka managed a small smile, while Waltfeld greeted Mu and Murrue as heartily as ever, though Yzak didn't miss the grave look in the fighter's one eye as he regarded them. He did not need to be told that Waltfeld wanted quiet time alone to discuss things, and that in itself satisfied him. It was about time they exchanged news, whether bad or good. He nodded to Athrun and Kira – both returning the gesture – and watched as Waltfeld traded news with his old comrades.
"I wish this could be a happier reunion," Waltfeld said, sighing slightly to himself.
Murrue managed a half-smile. "It can't be helped. But it still is good to see you again," she said kindly.
Waltfeld waved her off. "Same to you. I hear the Archangel was heavily damaged before coming here. How is she?"
The Captain moved her gaze to the red and white ship. "It's better. We repaired the worst in Orb, but I won't mind if we can have the ship checked over again here."
"Understood."
Yzak took the cue to step forward. "If you'll all follow me... There are a lot of things we need to discuss," he said, his voice holding a small amount of urgency. Kira and Lacus exchanged glances, but said nothing. In truth, Yzak did feel rather terrible – it had been months since he had parted with the Archangel, and he himself would have liked to have some time alone with Kira, Lacus and Athrun to catch up. He knew Dearka would also like to have some time alone with Miriallia, for sure. But in the middle of a war, with the final battle looming up like a forming typhoon, it couldn't be helped. Nobody complained as they moved towards the side of the hangar to where an elevator was located that would take them to the offices. They were all familiar enough with the limitations that war put on them, of what they couldn't do, no matter how much they wanted to.
Laniel had fallen in step with his old Commander as they walked, and the two shared light news on what had happened as they walked. Briefly, the Captain recounted the success of the tests they had performed with the Protectors of Heliopolis – Cagalli especially seemed happy and eager to learn the details, which Laniel provided with ease. A half-smile, half-grimace formed on Yzak's face as he listened to Laniel's report. It was thoughtful of the Captain to share light news with the group, considering the bombshell they were about to drop on their heads later.
Entering one of the main offices, Yzak moved straight to the front of the room with Waltfeld and Murrue while the rest seated themselves on the chairs. The place looked more like a briefing room than an office, though several tables were positioned by the walls, ready to be used. Yzak cast a swift glance around those in the room as Athrun, the last to enter, secured the door and remained there – the distance was close enough for him to join the conversation, but far enough for him to be kept away from it as well. Yzak wondered what was wrong with the blue-haired Coordinator. There were a number in the room – Yzak, Dearka, Waltfeld, Shiho and Laniel on his side, with Murrue, Mu, Kira, Lacus, Athrun and Cagalli on the other. He was especially grateful that the Shinn kid wasn't there. The guy was a great fighter, but Yzak could never get to good terms with him.
They began with Murrue, recounting everything that had happened since they had parted. The battle in Orb. The discovery of the third-generation Extendeds. The Justice taken down. Phaedra's Base. The Extended Coordinators. Miho and the Terminate. The battle. The Divine Justice. Yzak kept a neutral face – most of this he had known already, but he still listened with his full attention, determined not to miss any details. Some things might just give them a clue, or click in place, but when Murrue finally wrapped up her report, he realised that he had learned nothing new... except for the Divine Justice, which he must see after this. Yzak made a mental note of that. He gave the report after that. Regarding the Ptolemaius base. Meeting his mother at ZAFT's military headquarters. He skimmed through the testing of the Protectors of Heliopolis which had been explained excellently by Laniel earlier.
Then, finally, they reached Waltfeld.
For a moment, Yzak noticed that Waltfeld looked old. So incredibly old. It surprised him, even though he knew that there was perfectly good reason for Waltfeld to feel as such.
"ZAFT has a new weapon. A weapon that had been developed even before Gilbert Durandal's time during the last war," Waltfeld reported, taking a remote and bringing the screen down. Dearka turned and inserted a data block into the nearby computer, navigating through the files as Waltfeld spoke. "This weapon is called GENESIS ZERO, which you are aware of for some time now. It's only now that we finally discovered what it is. Our assumptions were correct – it is still a gamma ray emitter like the previous two GENESIS," he said. Yzak could have sworn he heard Athrun curse from the end of the room. "But the weapon functions very differently to the previous GENESIS. I can say it is more on par with the Requiem," he said, frowning.
Mu let out a half-laugh. "Guess I wasn't the only one confused as to why the last GENESIS was so similar to the first one."
Waltfeld nodded. Dearka tapped on a button on the keyboard and a blueprint, with notes, appeared on the screen. "We don't have the actual image, but we believe that it is located in a fortress. A large asteroid perhaps," he said, gesturing to the image. "Firing the GENESIS requires the same procedures that it always had used before this. But what is different is this," the screen switched, showing what looked like a crystallized orb, made up of different facets. "For now, we can call this a prism. Though it's one hell of a prism."
Kira was on his feet in an instant. "A prism? Then, the GENESIS's rays –"
"Will be deflected into many different areas in one firing," Athrun said, finally moving closer to the group. His green eyes were unreadable. Yzak noted with newfound interest that they glowed in a way he had not seen before. Almost... hungry. Almost.
"No... No, that can't be true!" Cagalli cried out, shaking her head as she did so. "A weapon like that... Why the hell have they made a weapon like that?"
"Because ZAFT is not interested in keeping the Naturals alive..." Yzak answered quietly, the image of his mother coming to his mind. He shook his head, angered with the memory of the encounter.
The silence that followed seemed almost impossible to break.
.
Lacus had been unusually silent ever since they had returned from the office, discussing matters regarding what they could do and what more needed to be done. Repairs. Preparations. There were small reports thrown here and there, but it was apparent that all their minds were occupied. As Kira walked beside her, he couldn't help but throw worried glances in her direction, mostly because she looked as if she was on the verge of collapse. With the discovery of the GENESIS ZERO, the usually strong way she carried herself seemed lost. It pained him, but at the same time, he knew that now was the best time than any. Now, when people still wanted to fight, was when Lacus's voice would best appear to speak to the people again. Lacus never stopped. With each fight, with each battle, she had always been there in the Archangel's bridge, commanding the soldiers to stop fighting... only they didn't.
After months of leaving his ship behind, Kira steered Lacus into the Aurora, paying no heed to the question that was in her gentle azure eyes. He had contacted Meyrin weeks ago, desperate for her expertise, and she had agreed to help. Kira knew that by now, Meyrin would have accomplished what he wanted. They walked easily, Kira still knowing the routes of the second-generation Nazca-class ship like the back of his hand as he navigated the way to the Aurora's bridge. As soon as the door slid open, surprised and delighted cries filled the air, though Meyrin seemed the happiest. She must've expected a visit from them later, and not so soon after their arrival.
"Lacus-sama! Commander Yamato!" she greeted happily, immediately bounding towards them with light, springy steps. "I'm so glad to see you! Both of you. General Joule has been working me day and night without rest!" she complained, ever the carefree girl Kira had come to know her to be. He couldn't help but smile at that. He wouldn't be the least surprised if Yzak had worked all his crew members to their limits.
Lacus, as usual, was an expert in hiding her sadness. "How are you, Meyrin?" she asked pleasantly, the smile so serene that Kira nearly believed it.
Meyrin clapped her hands together. "Alright. I've been able to do many things while we were here. We definitely had a better time here than you did down there," she added to Kira.
"Meyrin," Kira said, his voice dropping slightly. Meyrin raised her eyebrows. "Actually... I wanted to know about that thing I asked you to do. Is it ready?"
A range of emotions passed the other Coordinator's face. Surprise. Disbelief. Curiosity. Finally, delight. "Of course! It's ready whenever you need it!" she said happily. Kira gave her one slow nod and she straightened – the posture of a soldier who had just received orders from a superior officer. "Follow me. I'll take you there," she said, moving to head to the bridge elevator.
Lacus looked confused. "Kira..?" she managed, her eyes inquisitive. Gentle, calm azure eyes.
Kira smiled, placing an arm around her back as he led the way. "It's alright, Lacus. Trust me," he said quietly. Lacus had no response to that.
Meyrin led the way easily, and all the while, Kira kept his eyes on Lacus, watching her face closely. He knew her well enough to know that she was curious, but her face had the tendency of showing the underlying feelings she really had. Kira had often wondered how Lacus could keep on being so strong, far more than he himself was capable of. Her sadness, her fear... all could be hidden so well under the gentle face of hers which never failed to show her kind smile. Still, sometimes the flicker of emotion would still pass, but it was something Kira needed to look for, otherwise, he would never see it. Looking at her now, he saw the few moments when her guard faltered, showing her apprehension. He tightened his arm around her small shoulders, smiling reassuringly when she looked up at him.
The walk wasn't long. Clearly, Meyrin had chosen a good place that was not far enough from the Aurora for her to work on. Kira felt a small pang of guilt when he realised that on top of the work Yzak had given, Meyrin couldn't have had that much rest at all these weeks. But her eyes were bright, and her face was cheerful when she took the key to the door from her pocket and opened it, revealing a small, unused office. It was vacant save for a table and a chair, a computer, and endless wires that seemed to have tangled themselves around the table, connecting to the computer. Kira couldn't help but raise his eyebrows at the messy desk... though with that amount of wires and tubes, he figured there was hardly a way to keep the place tidy. From the look of it, someone had pushed the wires aside enough to make space for a lone microphone to stand, waiting for a speaker to use it.
Lacus turned, her eyes surprised as she regarded both Kira and Meyrin. "What's going on?" she asked.
Kira exchanged a glance with Meyrin before stepping forward, gazing down at her. "I asked Meyrin to do this," he answered carefully. "It has access to all the channels... and even some private ones."
Meyrin nodded. "I managed to get into the private channels for ZAFT and the Earth Alliance... not all, but enough," she said. Kira noticed that Meyrin had a hopeful expression on her face. "I hope that Lacus-sama will sing again... for those who are killed," she said, the blush now apparent on her face as she voiced her desire. Quickly, Meyrin bowed and saluted, smiling again. "I know that whatever Lacus-sama says will touch the hearts of many," she said, excusing herself.
Once they were alone, Lacus released a small sigh. She cast her eyes back to the computer, longing to sit down and sing to the world. When had she last sang to those out there? The first war? Meer had sang for her when she found herself unable to do so. Now, the idea of singing a song frightened her. It was scary, to sit there again and be Lacus again... Lacus Clyne, and not Chairwoman Clyne. She turned her eyes back to Kira, a million questions running through her mind. Though she had not voiced any of them, Kira merely nodded, as if already knowing what she wanted to say... He might have already known, knowing him. The smile that appeared on her face was sad – even she could feel the sadness of the tug of her lips.
"Is it alright?" she asked softly.
Kira nodded.
Lacus lowered her eyes. "Thank you, Kira. With this... I can do my best, just like you," she said softly. She took his hand, allowing him to lead her to the computer, and sat down on the chair as Kira activated the system with ease. It took only a few moments to give her the signal, silently telling her that she was now live on air. She inhaled deeply.
"Everyone... This is Lacus Clyne."
.
As he shut the door of the car, Athrun looked up at the house that loomed in front of him and suddenly had the desire to turn back and drive. He couldn't truly fathom the reason his feet had taken him to this place, and wondered also if he should be here at all. Could he be here? What did he want to say? Did he want to apologise? To ask for forgiveness in case if he couldn't control himself and ended up killing his friend? Athrun sighed. He shook his head. What was he doing here? There couldn't be a worse place in the whole of Heliopolis for him to visit than this one! Quickly, he turned and opened the door. Just as he was about to duck inside, an all-too-familiar voice called his name and he shut his eyes, sighing. So much for running away.
Straightening again, Athrun turned to face the woman he had often regarded as his own mother. "Auntie."
Caridad was beaming, the relief apparent in her eyes as she moved and hugged him. He caught snatches of her voice muffled by his uniform, saying words of gratitude as she did so. When she pulled back, she examined his face closely. "You look tired, Athrun-kun. Are you alright? And Kira..?"
"Kira is fine. So is Lacus and Cagalli," Athrun said quickly, smiling slightly. "I'm sorry I came alone, Auntie. You must be worried about Kira."
Caridad laughed. "Knowing Kira, he's probably busy right now. But I know he will be alright," she said. The confidence in her voice hurt him. He looked away. "Athrun-kun... Are you alright?" When he didn't answer immediately, Caridad linked her arm with his and led him to the garden. "Come, we shall talk," she said gently. "The children are sleeping inside."
Sometimes, Athrun truly missed the feeling of having a mother... to have his fears and worries known by a maternal figure as how his late mother and Caridad had always seemed to be able to do. As they neared the side of the house, Athrun spotted another figure sitting on the table, his unseeing eyes trained on them as they approached. He recognised Reverend Malchio instantly and greeted him as Caridad led him to sit by the table. Athrun never truly thought of speaking to the Reverend about his problems, but it was apparent that Caridad, at least, believed that the man should be present.
"Now then, Athrun-kun. Will you tell us what is bothering you?"
Athrun leaned forwards, resting his elbows on the table, his fingers laced together and pressed against the bridge of his nose. Briefly, he recounted what he had gone through since the kidnapping aboard the Renegade, careful to skip unnecessary details as he told his story of Phaedra's Base. He kept his eyes low, ignoring the silent intakes of breath that came to Caridad, or the wave of curiosity that came from Reverend Malchio. Once he started to talk, it was easy to lose himself in his story, the feelings let out, the insecurities explained. When he finally looked up, he realised that he couldn't truly fathom the expression on Caridad's face. She had an expression of... sorrow. Deep sorrow, and what Athrun thought was... love. Love in her eyes. Sorrow on her face. Was that what he was seeing?
"...You have the ability to control yourself, do you not?" Reverend Malchio asked, taking his attention.
Athrun nodded slowly. "It gets easier after a while," he said quietly.
"Are you aware that you possess the SEED?" the Reverend asked. Athrun raised his eyebrows, surprised. That was new to him. The Reverend read his silence like a book. "The SEED is a gift to Naturals and Coordinators who will surpass our stage as it is. They have the potential and the gift of evolution... of being more than what we are, and getting into the next stage of the existence of humans. I believe it is your possession of the SEED that allows you to follow your own path and not be used by what has been done to you."
"...I don't understand," Athrun said finally, shaking his head. How could he? He had fought for the wrong things so many times, had been manipulated by his emotions so easily, that he could not decipher what he was hearing now. Caridad's eyes were calm as she regarded him, but she reached forwards and held his hand, her face kind.
"Superior Evolutionary Element Destined-factor – that is what we have come to known as the SEED factor. Both you and Kira possess the SEED. It is a process. Some who possess the SEED can only go through the primary stages and not develop what they have. Perhaps you may recall being able to fight and think more clearly when you are on the battlefield, Athrun?"
Athrun thought. It definitely wasn't foreign to him, how the image of an emerald-coloured jewel would explode at the back of his mind whenever he was on the battlefield. Sometimes, it was due to anger and pain. Sometimes, it was due to determination. Yet he had never truly attempted to understand what the thing was, apart from the fact that it definitely gave him a clearer mind. Like how I am when I try to protect Kira… he thought, his eyes widening slightly. Was it possible? Athrun raised his head, his eyes on the Reverend who merely nodded, able to read his emotions even without his eyesight.
"It is highly possible that you have gone through the process of evolution completely. This can only be done with great determination, and a great desire to achieve and protect something. In your case, it is highly likely that you are forced to enter this third stage of SEED after what had happened in the facility."
"But why?" Athrun couldn't help but ask.
The Reverend shook his head, signalling his inability to answer the question. "But those who possess the SEED tend to believe that this world is still worth saving," he said, waving his hand in a gesture that suggested one to concentrate. "So perhaps that is why." Athrun raised his head slightly, straining his ears. He could just hear the radio playing in the background, a gentle but familiar voice reaching his ears. Surprise flickered on his face and he immediately took out his handheld, switching to the radio and increasing the volume. Lacus's voice greeted them and he stared at the device, stunned.
"I have not been able to fulfill my duties as a leader these few months. I have not been able to stop the war. I have not been able to stop the fighting. But… I know it is not too late for us to change things, together."
"Lacus," Athrun breathed, shaking his head. He was on his feet and running in seconds, running quickly, back to his car, the concern evident on his face. At the garden, Caridad turned her head to Reverend Malchio and smiled.
"Everyone… Please, let us stop the fighting now. Naturals or Coordinators, we are all in this together. We have all fought, and we have all lost. It is painful, isn't it? To not know what is the right thing to do. To not know what is the right thing to think. To not know the truth about the world. But that is why we are alive. To learn. To accept. To fight for the life we want, a peaceful life for everyone. Do we want our children to grow up knowing that we have killed because we never understood? Our choices are what makes us human. Does fighting make us human? We make mistakes. But we also correct our mistakes. That is human."
.
Ryuu Apene was amused. More than that, he was delighted. To have Lacus Clyne give her speech just before he was due to fire Artemis was priceless. Completely priceless. He knew how much people looked up to Lacus Clyne. He knew the Coordinators loved her. He wondered what advantage they would get if the Coordinators decided to stop fighting just before Artemis fired. The damage would be insurmountable. Victory would be in his hands even before people could fight. He chuckled deeply, shaking his head. Lacus Clyne was a mere girl who was still in the process of growing up. The true meaning of life and pain were still things that she did not fully understand. The threat of the Coordinators. The danger on what they, the Naturals, might face if they continued to allow the Coordinators to dominate them…
He could not let it happen.
"Let us stop. Let us learn. But never forget. Never forget those on the battlefield, who had died protecting those they love. Both Coordinators and Naturals wish for nothing but to be happy. But it is not impossible. Let us remember and begin a new tomorrow. Together."
Ryuu clenched his fists, anger in his eyes now. Those in the battlefield died because they were killed. Killed by the Coordinators. And he wondered just how many more would face the same fate if they did not fight for their peace.
His anger was silenced briefly as a gentle tune reached his ears. Surprise flickered on his face – surprise because it had been so long since she heard the Clyne girl sing. But true enough, her voice began to float from the radio, gentle and magical as ever.
"...Mizu no naka ni yoru ga yureteru
Kanashii hodo shizuka ni tatazumu
Midorinasu kishibe
Utsukushii yoake wo
Tada matte iraretara
Kirei na kokoro de..."
The night is wavering in the water
The greening shore is so still and silent
That it is painful
If only I could wait
For a beautiful dawn
With a pure heart...
.
Miriallia didn't realise just how much she missed Dearka until she disembarked from the Archangel and saw him standing near, almost as if he had been waiting for her all along. A small blush crept to her cheeks as he turned, his face half-surprised, and raised a hand as a greeting to her. The sight of him, still clad in his black ZAFT uniform after all this time, still smiling, still fine, sent her head spinning. The tear escaped her eyelid almost too easily as she ran to him, throwing her arms around him as she did so.
Amazement and surprise were the two emotions that was painted on Dearka's face as he caught her, squeezing her tight. He pulled back, his eyes glinting with amusement. "Someone clearly misses me," he said lightly, grinning despite himself.
Miriallia blushed furiously. "It's not my fault I'm glad. Knowing you, I'm surprised you haven't lost an eye by now," she said just as lightly.
Dearka laughed. It felt so natural to do so with her finally beside him again. He pulled her into his arms. "I'm glad you're alright, Miriallia."
"...Me too, Dearka. I missed you," she said, her voice so quiet Dearka thought he had imagined it.
Only he knew he hadn't. Because he felt the same as she did.
Standing at a distance, Yzak watched them both, unable to make full sense of what he was seeing. It wasn't that he could not understand love – he just could not decipher, at times, how people could find it in their hearts to truly forgive others, as how Miriallia did to Dearka. Yzak hadn't been completely oblivious to what Dearka had said to Miriallia during the first war. The blonde-haired Captain had confided in him about it numerous times already in the past. So when he saw the happiness in the girl's aqua eyes, the relief when she hugged him, he could only shake his head, uncomprehending. Miriallia had stepped past the boundary of revenge and hate. Past the boundary of Coordinator and Natural. He stared at his handheld, Lacus's voice just loud enough for him to listen as she spoke. Under normal circumstances, Yzak would have labelled Lacus as an idealist through and through. But seeing something like this in front of his eyes made him question that.
"It's amazing... isn't it?"
"What makes you say that, Hahnenfuss?" Yzak asked, sliding an eye to look at his Lieutenant who had appeared by his side.
Shiho glanced at Yzak, a small smile on her lips. "Hope."
Yzak paused. When she put it like that, it wasn't as confusing and remarkable as he thought it was. "What do you fight for, Lieutenant?"
There was a small purse of the lips as Shiho considered that. Finally, she shook her head. "Maybe for hope itself. For those like the Captain who has a future to look forward to. And... for our fallen comrades."
"...Kurai umi to sora no mukou ni
Arasoi no nai basho ga aruno to
Osiete kureta no wa dare
Dare mo ga tadori tsukenai
Soretomo dareka no kokoro no naka ni..."
Who told me that
There is a land without any conflicts
Beyond the dark seas and skies?
No one can reach that land,
Or perhaps it only exists in someone's heart
The fallen comrades. Rusty and Miguel. Nicol. The Voltaire. So many comrades lost. Yzak smiled slightly, nodding to himself. Yes... he was fighting for precisely that. For those who had perished, so he could continue their legacy and ensure that they had not been fighting for nothing all this time. But something about Shiho's words gained his attention and he turned to her, arching an eyebrow.
"You said you fight for those like the Captain... who has a future to look forward to. Please explain that, Hahnenfuss."
Shiho shook her head, a small smile on her lips. "Apart from the military, I do not have anything else. And it is my duty as a soldier to protect those around me. I have important people I wish to protect," she said calmly, though her eyes were looking straight at Yzak.
Oh heck, it was the last battle, wasn't it? To die trying. "What if you are given the opportunity to have a future to look forward to?"
Shiho arched an eyebrow. "Sir?"
The redness was beginning to grow apparent on his cheeks. "What if you are presented with an opportunity for a future that you may look forward to?" he asked, rephrasing his original question. Yzak cleared his throat loudly. "I have yet to fulfil my duties that our parents have bestowed on me. And I see no reason why I shouldn't. You are, of course, able to refuse the offer should you... feel the need to."
She couldn't help the tug of the corner of her lips as she heard him speak. Yzak was looking away now, at perhaps anything but her, but it was enough. "If that is the case, I shall, of course, fight for the future that has been promised to me," she answered coolly, turning her eyes away. "I will look forward to the future... if it means remaining by your side."
For a brief moment, Yzak could appreciate Dearka's endless stories about Miriallia. "Then I will fight for it and win it... Shiho."
.
"...Mizu no nagare wo shizumete
Kureru daichi wo uruosu shirabe
Ima wa doko nimo nakutemo
Kitto jibun de te ni ireruno
Itsumo, itsuka, kitto..."
A melody that can quench the thirst
Of the land that calms the waters' flow
Even if it does not exist anywhere right now,
I will come to possess it
Always, someday, for sure
It was tempting for him to listen. To let go and forget. Only he had strayed too far, had gone too deep. Despite her kind words, her offer of forgiveness, Yuri Amalfi highly doubted that he would be able to receive the gentle offer of peace. To listen to her sing reminded him of Nicol. And every reminder of his son sent the usual electric pain down his chest, leaving a tingling feeling that often made him breathless. The pain was too deep, the damage too severe. Damage to himself as much as the damage done to the world. In a way, he was glad that his wife had left him.
Amalfi glanced at the photo of Romina and Nicol standing by the side of his desk. Listening to Lacus's gentle voice, the tears flowed down his cheeks without invitation. Before he knew it, he was sobbing, his shoulders shaking as his hand moved to the frame, though he couldn't touch it. He did not dare touch the picture of his wife and his son. What had he done? Since when had the memory of his son become a pain and burden to him? Nicol had been his greatest pride. Romina had been his greatest love. And now the memory of both brought him nothing but sadness and hate. Hate that he truly wished to unleash to the world, just to satisfy his pain. Only the pain never went away. Not really. It was never truly enough. A neverending, sad cycle.
A peaceful world. How he wished he would be able to see one. Yet he knew he would not be able to do so. But he could not turn away. Turning away meant that he would be betraying what he thought he knew about his son. After losing so much, Amalfi could not lose that. Anything but that. He had to cling to that knowledge, that belief that his son would be behind him were he alive now, cheering him on.
But a familiar image of a Coordinator with blue hair and green eyes would always come to him, deny him in his mind, and he truly did not know any longer.
.
Slightly breathless, Athrun reached the abandoned office, only to see the door ajar with Cagalli standing just outside it, silent tears running down her cheeks. But she was smiling. She raised a hand to wipe her tears, shaking her head as she did so. Athrun exhaled slowly and walked, his eyes trained on her. She noticed his presence at once and turned, raising her eyebrows – her mouth parted to say his name but never got the opportunity to do so as Athrun enveloped her in his arms, pressing his face against her shoulder. "Cagalli," he said softly, tightening his hold. "I'm back."
There was a small movement as Cagalli laughed, though the laugh was forced, a mixture of a sob and a chuckle. "Idiot. Of course you're back. Welcome home," she said, hugging him tight.
"I won't run away... Not any longer, not after this," Athrun said, forcing the words out from his mouth.
Cagalli pulled back. "Athrun..?"
"Please stay by my side, Cagalli," Athrun said quietly, moving his hand to rest against her cheek. "After this war... and as long as we both shall live... I want you to be with me, right by my side."
"Of course I'll be here," Cagalli answered, her voice cheerful even though the tears ran faster down her cheeks. "Idiot. Do you know any other lion around here?" she asked, her voice muffled as he pulled her into his arms again.
"...Mizu no akashi wo kono te ni
Subete no honoo wo nomikonde nao
Hiroku yasashiku nagareru
Sono shizukesa ni tadoritsuku no
Itsumo, itsuka, kitto..."
Let the token of water be in my hands
Even after engulfing all the flames,
It still continues to flow, gently and broadly
I will reach its tranquility
Always, someday, for sure
Lacus looked up, her tear-filled eyes on Kira as she reached the end of his song. He had a hand on her shoulder, the other clasping hers in a gentle hold, and he nodded at her with a soft smile on his lips. His eyes, too, were wet, never seeming to be dry and happy whenever he was forced into the cockpit of a Gundam. It pained her. But it would pain her even more if he had been the silent self he had lapsed into before the second war. No, she was grateful for Kira to be by her side. To support her, to be strong, to be himself... Kira Yamato, fighter of peace.
"...Anata no te wo tori..."
With your hand in mine...
"FIRE!"
Ryuu watched, triumphant, as the gamma weapon released its translucent beam, travelling fast, very fast, striking Aprillius of PLANTs exactly on target.
A tear escaped from gentle azure eyes, dropping onto the lap of the pink-haired songstress.
Author's Notes: 'Mizu no Akashi' is a song that I truly wished had had more of a cameo in the Gundam SEED/Destiny series. Out of all of Lacus's songs, I think it's the best and thus decided it should be the theme song for this fic. My thanks go to Ciel Phantomhive XiaoLang Li, IgNighted and blackphoenix4ever for your reviews. Thanks also for the favourites, alerts and also for reading! I know this chapter is early – it's one that I truly wanted to write for a long time now. It's a little shorter than the previous ones, but I couldn't write more without it seeming a little awkward. In any case, next chapter scheduled to be uploaded by 11th December!
Ciel Phantomhive XiaoLang Li: I agree that peace is very hard to get. Even in the real world, it's hard to get peace, which is why it's so sad when there are fighters like Kira and Athrun who just never give up. It's admirable, and when I write this fic, I really wish we can all hope and strive to become like them. I'm glad you like the story ideas! I've been playing around with the ideas a lot recently, so we shall see!
IgNighted: I'd have loved to read a Gundam fic from you, seriously! You've had some pretty awesome insights with the reviews you've dropped all this time, and it'd be nice if you'll write one sometime in the future. I'm glad you have faith on the end of this fic. I shall do my best not to disappoint!
blackphoenix4ever: Renegade is the longest story I've ever written. Yet I agree and wish that it will just never end. The experience writing it and reading all your views has been amazing. In any case, I thank you so much for your review! It definitely gave me a heck of a boost, and I'm glad you dropped a word. ;D Hope you enjoyed this one and that you'll keep on reading until the end!