When Robert visited Jane some time after their reunion, the circumstances were quite different. He had procured a minor house for her, though much bigger than her earlier lodgings. He had also dwelled the question of employment back and forth with Percival, but hadn't found anything suitable and had decided it was for the best if he provided for her altogether. Percival had, in his defence as discreetly as possible, wondered if maybe the woman were with child, whereupon Lord Grantham had answered with a firm negative. Maybe it was something to think about, but anything regarding Jane that didn't concern the following 24 hours, he just didn't see worth worrying over. It was now two months since he had traced her, and they had spent several stolen and far too short afternoons together.

A part of him couldn't help but feeling guilty over the ease and practicality he had handled it all with. He had never been good at playing an unexpected hand. That had always been his mother's talent, so perhaps he did have some of her in him after all.

He quickly looked around the empty street before he used his key to let himself into the house. The moment he closed the door, only five minutes late, his Jane came running towards him and all the worries of the outside world left his shoulders and he burst up into a big smile. He took her in his arms and with ease swung her around with a joy that he'd thought he had left with his youth. Maybe he had been born again. He put her down, still smiling that ridiculous big smile, because here everything was fine, here everyone was happy.

"Hi" he said softly. She smiled back at him, shining like a sun. His feelings of guilt all vanished in an instant and he all he could think was that it was almost unbelievable that he had managed not to act on his feelings her whole first year at Downton.

"Hi" She had never pictured herself to be so happy again, not after she'd been informed of Eric's death. But here they were. She knew she ought to feel bad about it, any decent woman would. But when he wasn't there she forced herself not to think of Downton and when he was there, how could she be anything else but happy? They kept looking into each other's eyes until she realized he was still wearing his coat, hat and gloves.

"Let me" she said and started taking off his coat. He handed it to her, but then wouldn't let go. For a split of a second he had been back at Downton handing a maid his coat and it made him feel utterly uncomfortable. But once again he tried to shake off any feeling of the outside world and let go. Jane smiled at him with a curious look, but simply shook her head and hung up his coat. She had to go up on her tippy toes to reach the hanger and her dress went up a bit, showing her calves. It was a simple navy blue dress, worn but otherwise perfectly fine. However, even Robert could see that it was old fashioned. He had been so occupied thinking about house, furniture, food and her son, he had completely forgotten about her wardrobe.

"Let me buy you a dress" he asked spontaneously with a cheerful smile. Jane turned around in bafflement.

"What?"

"A dress, maybe two, to start with" Now when he had uttered the idea, he found it was a great one. He could already see her in a beautiful light blue dress, ready to accompany him to the theatre in London. Jane walked over to him with a happy, but slightly confused expression upon her face.

"Robert, you don't have to buy me things, you've already done so much." Her gaze flickered, but soon returned to him. She was not some young girl obsessed with pretty things. "I'm happy just to be with you" he looked at her in earnest, still unaware of the problem.

"I want to. Well, maybe I'm not the best adviser on dresses. Especially not with this new fashion" he figured there was a reason why Cora and the girls never asked for his opinion when it came to their wardrobes "but I have an excellent tailor. And I visited a great jeweller last time I was in London, he . . . " with every word it became clearer and clearer that he made her feel uncomfortable, she couldn't really stand still and she looked at him, her eyes pleading him to stop and she shook her head. "Have I offended you?" he asked with a whole different tone, still confused. But soon he realized his mistake. He had acted too fast too soon and now he had made her feel like a . . . "I just want to make sure you have everything you need" he tried, but she still wouldn't speak "I have offended you. I'm so sorry, Jane" he took her in his arms and she hugged him tightly, her head pressed against his chest.

She was afraid. In the beginning it had been he who had kissed her without her even knowing her own feelings, he who had told her to stay when she had been ready to leave, he who had then tracked her down wanting to be with her. And he had given her so much, without her ever asking for it. Still, she feared to become an installation, a woman he had waiting and who he could simply buy off when he tired of her.

"I love you" she whispered and for a second his heart stopped. He hadn't realized how he had longed for those words, how much he had needed to hear them. He kissed her hair, then put two fingers under her chin and tilted her head so he could look into her soulful eyes. She continued before he had a chance to reply.

"I know you can't say it because . . . because of how things are, but I wanted to tell you" she sniffed "That's why I am here with you. Not because of money, or what you've done for Freddie, though I can't help but love you more for helping him"

"Dearest Jane" his hands cupped her face "I know . . . and I you. That's why I want to be with you, want to take care of you, not because . . ." He didn't handle this as well as he'd hoped, not as a gentleman, this was not even a gentleman's situation to be in. The tears were threatening, but he fought to stop them. It hurt him that he couldn't say the word, but the truth was he wasn't even sure if he did love her. He did not not love her, he was definitely infatuated and that to ridicule, but maybe love wasn't the right word to describe the incredible fondness he felt for her. And even if it were, it wouldn't be right say it, not with Cora still living and breathing. "Do you believe me?"

She smiled through the tears and nodded. She did, but she knew they were in a hopeless situation. And in their hopeless situation the only thing they could do was to decide to be happy when they now had the time.

"Have you eaten? Do you want something?" she asked, not knowing whether he had had time to eat and it was well after luncheon.

"No" now the tears were gone and there was only her smile, their home and their time. She went up on her tippy toes and kissed him.

Her new bed was much bigger, but after they'd made love he still held her close. They lay there content and entwined, he had her small hand in his and he looked at her delicate fingers, the marks of a ring were visible on one of them.

"Tell me about your husband" he asked. She thought for a moment, not really knowing what to tell him.

"His name was Eric, he worked at the post office."

"Was he a good man?" It was crass of him to ask and he sent a pray for forgiveness from the man whose wife was now his mistress.

"Yes, a very good man, and a wonderful father." She sat up in the bed, the sheet covering most of her body, with her loose dark hair resting on her naked shoulders "I think it's good that Freddie got away from the memories, so he can move on"

"And how about you?" he regretted the question immediately, it was beyond crass, it was coarse. "I'm sorry. Look at me, jealous of a dead man when I've got no right . . . pathetic" It was ridiculous of him and unfair, he was the one who was still married. But she turned to him, took his face in her hands and stroked his trouble brow.

"I miss him, of course I do, but he is gone . . . and you have no reason to be jealous" she gave him a quick shy kiss and then a warm smile "I'm yours" slowly he smiled back at her.

"Does that mean I can buy you a dress?" he asked as he tried to at least pretend to be serious. But how could he, in their heavenly bed in their sheltered bedroom? He started laughing and she hit him with one of the pillows, but finally she agreed.

"Yes, and I'm sure you will be an excellent fashion consultant" and with that she kissed him again.