Part IV
Bella was pleased that following their impromptu dinner get-together, there was an increase in communication. It wasn't because their emails were getting longer, however. They had learned the dangerous, yet alluring habit of text messaging. It was addictive in its ability to be used subtly around the office. Unfortunately, it did nothing to hide her facial reactions, so Rosalie frequently caught her distracted smiles and bright eyes when she went to "take down an appointment over the phone" or "schedule a staff meeting." Even Jenks noticed her positive attitude and assumed it had to do with her engagement in the work. He went back to his office with conceited satisfaction.
Edward was telling her about the latest movie he'd seen. He was definitely giving it a thumbs down, and listed his reasons why. This had been in response to Bella telling him she and Alice were going to see a movie this weekend. Her problem was that she didn't know what was out right now and worth seeing. Their communication became sporadic, and it wasn't until one afternoon when Jenks was in a conference that she heard from Edward again in the form of a cryptic phone call asking if she had plans Saturday afternoon. She admitted she didn't, and he replied with a cross street for her to meet him at, and a time.
She agreed and whatever guesses she had about his plans were pushed to the back of her mind as she got caught up in her numerous day-to-day tasks. Not only that, responding to their ongoing tidbits of conversation made the week go by fairly quickly.
On Friday night, Alice attempted to make a dessert, and when Bella came home, the kitchen was a flour and sugar disaster. Alice was more frustrated with the failed project than apologetic in her greeting, and they ended up laughing at where she'd gone wrong in the process.
"I didn't know baking powder couldn't be eyeballed! It said half of a teaspoon and I tapped the tin of it over the bowl to let some loose. Look how it deflated! So in the next try I added more. I really think this recipe is flawed."
Bella gently added a comment or two about how too much baking powder made batter rise to a degree that caused it to collapse in the end. They cleaned up the kitchen together and then ordered Chinese food and put on a movie. A folded newspaper lay on the coffee table, the rentals section on top.
"Hey Al... about your living here," Bella started.
Alice lowered her plate to her lap, her hazel eyes brimming with anxious activity. "I know. I'm sorry about the kitchen. You're probably really tired when you get home from work and—"
"Don't worry about that."
"I've been looking around for a place. I think I found one that might be promising."
"Oh, really?"
It was the disappointment in her voice that made Alice pause. Bella seized the opportune opening. "I kind of like having you around..."
Alice's face shone with pleasant surprise. However, it didn't take much to turn her scatter of words into a thorough exploration of future living arrangements. She had just gotten past descriptions of two-bedroom apartments she'd seen in her previous searches when Bella drew her down from the clouds.
"Unfortunately I can't leave this place until my first year lease is up," she informed her pragmatically. "It's only a few more months, but I understand if you don't want to camp in the living room any longer, especially if you found a promising option."
Alice looked almost guilty. "I kind of fibbed about that. I didn't want to burden you. I've still been looking, but I like your offer better. When your lease is up we'll go back to the rental section."
Happy with the decision, they discussed easy solutions to turn Alice's corner living room space into a makeshift bedroom. The room itself was shaped awkwardly in that it was a long rectangle, and the TV area was used only on one side so the couch and entertainment space wouldn't be so far apart. Bella had had no idea what to do with the other half of the room after she moved in. It turned out Alice already had some ideas in mind after having spent so much time in it. They would buy one of those five-foot square bookshelves to separate the space and organize Alice's things more in the blocked-off area.
It was very late by the time they ended the discussion. Bella was in a sleepy-happy mood when she shed her clothes and climbed into bed. There was a text message from Edward waiting on her cell phone.
"Don't forget about tomorrow. And dress casual."
She didn't understand what all the secrecy was about, but played along because she knew it amused him. She also wondered how creative he was going to get. Her acquiescence was almost like a silent challenge.
She sent off a text to confirm tomorrow and settled into her bed, eyes closed, as a few guesses drifted into her mind. It could be an afternoon of bowling, since he'd told her how much he enjoyed the sport. She imagined him wanting to show off a little. Maybe he was counting on that assumption and chose something more challenging. Perhaps he was taking her camping over the weekend.
When she was fourteen-years-old, her parents decided to take her on an impromptu camping trip in hopes of turning off her newly adopted teenage moodiness with quality family time. This meant seclusion from anything that entertained her, including the comfort of modern conveniences. Renee encouraged Charlie's rusty fire-making skills and made several exaggerated attempts to draw Bella into the conversation. But her parents' fake cheer didn't clear her heavy cloud of grumpiness or defiant silence.
"If only we had sent Bells to Girl Scouts. You never know when you'll have to fend for yourself in the wild," her father said, helpfully bestowing his wisdom as they sat around the used fire pit not thirty feet from the family car. The old Volkswagen was parked on a tilted patch of dry earth between two trees.
A few tendrils of smoke piped from the crisscrossed arrangement of sticks and small logs, followed by the first few licks of flame. Bella slapped a mosquito from her leg.
"Honey, that's wonderful. Isn't your father amazing? I'll get out the pot...but I have to find water." She rummaged through their bag, letting half its contents spill out unceremoniously. "I think I forgot to pack the rice. Beans and marshmallows it is! I'll be right back with that water."
Bella was perplexed as to why her parents called this torture of bug bites, bad meals and hard pads to sleep on "quality family time." By the end of the weekend, Charlie's smiling mustache had drooped, Renee's boisterous efforts to hike the nearby trails lost their steam, and Bella's skin was covered in calamine lotion.
After that, the Swans amended their decision for impromptu camping trips, choosing to stay in the comfort of their home, and Bella got to keep her teenage rebellion for another year.
She burrowed into the warmth of her blanket and thought a camping trip might not be so terrible if it was with Edward. But surely he would have told her if they were going to do something adventurous and she needed to pack specific supplies. Still, if Edward took her camping, she wondered if he would pack only one tent. Those more enjoyable thoughts overrode the others and made her cheeks flush against the cool pillow.
She wore comfortable sneakers, jeans, and a sweater under her coat the following morning. Alice had sense enough to make a pot a coffee, which Bella was grateful for as she mixed a few ounces of the caffeine into a mug of hot chocolate. She had slept in longer than she intended to and threw in a couple slices of bread to toast.
"Are we still seeing a movie tonight?" Alice asked doubtfully.
"I wish I could say... Edward hasn't so much as hinted about what we're doing."
"I want to meet him."
It was a simple declaration, and Bella rolled her eyes, reaching for a reasonable excuse to avoid that introduction until...until she was sure about him.
"Anyway, Sunday matinees are cheaper," Alice went on.
"True..." She finished the last of her cinnamon toast and drained her mug.
Alice took it from her to rinse it out in the sink. "Have fun, Bells. And don't even think about cutting the fun short on account of me. I'm thinking I'll fix up my pseudo-room today, do a little shopping for space-saving organizers, clean up—"
Bella had already left.
The crisp air felt good on her face as she walked the half mile to the subway, and her knit cap kept her hair from flying around. She took the 6 two stops north and got off at 51st. Edward met her at Lexington Ave when she resurfaced from the tunnels. She was relieved that she had dressed appropriately when she saw him in similar fashion. And there was no camping gear in sight. Below his jacket and scarf he wore dark jeans and tennis shoes. The weather had tinged his cheeks bright pink. Without a warm hat, his hair was a wild pile atop his head, bending in many directions against the intermittent breeze. He was glad to see her.
"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" she asked in greeting.
His answer was non-committal. "We're going there now."
They continued on 51st. "You really know how to keep a secret. I don't have the faintest idea what you're up to."
He grinned. "Good."
The high-end stores and boutiques they passed were packed with shoppers. She hoped Edward's plan wasn't to catch up on his Christmas shopping—they looked like madhouses on the inside.
He grabbed her gloved hand so they wouldn't get separated in the moving crowds. It added warmth and his firm grip on her was comforting. They stopped at the corner of 5th Ave on the outskirts of Rockefeller Center. A number of different events were taking place at the plaza, so it was filled with a buzz of people. As he led her to the center of it, it dawned on her with sudden horror that they would be ice-skating.
He felt her pull back in reaction. "Oh, no," she muttered, but he tugged her back to his side.
It was noisy and he leaned down and spoke in her ear, his breath tickling the hairs at her temple. "It's why I didn't tell you the plan. But—"
She stepped back to look up at him, her eyes round and huge. "You know my tendency to be... unbalanced. Edward."
Worry and reluctance were evident in her expression. He tried to control himself from splitting into a smile. "I won't let you fall. Remember? No full-body casts. Besides, it's gorgeous weather and it'll be fun. Trust me."
"Well..." She glanced at the merry skaters flying around the rink at speeds that sent a shudder through her. But the anxiousness in Edward's eyes was persuasive. She didn't want to fall into the trap of being Boring Bella that she had feared of falling into from the start.
"Also, I already bought tickets." Somehow he knew this last reason would win her over. She readily agreed that there was no sense in wasting the expense of the tickets, so they went to get fitted with skates. It was okay walking on them over the carpeted area, and she practiced staying upright in the darn things while he finished lacing up.
He helped her onto the ice. She felt sick to her stomach. She clutched his hand and glided beside him, her knees locked. Two adolescents passed in front of them. While he stopped short with the experienced ease and grace of an athlete, the abrupt movement left her unbalanced. She wavered on the blades and made a grab at him to steady herself.
The experience so far made her recoil in a way she hadn't expected. She hadn't ice-skated since she was very young. It wasn't something she hated or feared, but she had never really felt the urge to do it in her spare time as an adult. As of right now she decided that it was an activity she definitely disliked. Her legs wouldn't stop trembling and she refused to let go of Edward. The only thing that she was truly enjoying was the feeling of his body flush against her own. It was steady and comfortable, and caused a pleasant flutter deep down that curled.
He pushed a piece of hair back from her shoulder. The movement made her slowly aware of herself and worked to thin the mist of fear that surrounded her. Keeping her hold on his arm, she took a moment to look around. The other skaters were unaware of her predicament, enjoying themselves on the ice.
She and Edward passed by the tremendous Christmas tree at the head of the rink, towering over them magnificently. She'd read in the paper that this year's was a 74-foot Norway Spruce the city had brought in from Pennsylvania. Gray winter clouds blanketed the sky, obscuring the sun's rays enough to allow the holiday lights on it to twinkle. She knew it was even more beautiful at night, when the evergreen seemed to transform into a breathtaking mountain of delicate-looking gold and red. The city showcased it further with spotlights of blue that shimmered along the cascading fountains behind the angelic statues. The rest of the plaza was boldly lit with jewel tones that made the buildings look like chunks of crystal.
"See, it's not so bad," Edward said encouragingly.
"Not so bad," she agreed belatedly as a new breeze danced across her face. "It's always beautiful here. It's the one thing I really love about the holidays. The lights."
"I like them, too," he admitted.
"Just keep moving one foot in front of the other. Your limbs will know what to do naturally."
"Okay," she said, trying very hard to believe him.
People of all ages littered the ice. Parents bent over toddlers, holding them up as they learned how to skate for the first time. Others liked the speed of it, and zoomed around, weaving in between the casual skaters. In one corner, an elderly woman turned in slow, weightless movements that reflected some elite figure skating skills in the past. She kicked up in a twirl and landed effortlessly on the blades. She smiled at Bella as they passed her.
Her mind busy with all of her observations, Bella had forgotten to be afraid and uncoordinated. Edward noticed it, too. Gradually they increased the speed of their carefully synchronized gliding to a comfortable level, and she laughed with a nervous thrill. She suddenly felt like she could become a moderately good skater and hold her own during the hours that they circled the icy perimeter. She ended up having so much fun that it was Edward who eventually suggested they go find a place to eat a late lunch.
The holiday lights were glowing more prominently since the daylight had receded after its feeble attempts to shine. It was a brilliant sight, which made Bella not want to leave. She was caught up in the dazzle of them around her, until they began to turn on their sides, as her equilibrium tipped. It happened too fast for her to prevent. She reached out for Edward again, and to her surprise they both fell toward the unforgiving ice.
He let out a muffled curse and her eyes squinted shut, preparing for the worst of the impact. His body took the blow, protecting her from injury. After a deafening moment, he moaned and stirred beneath her. She opened her eyes to see how bad it was.
"You're hurt."
"I'm not," he said as she leaned over him. Her hair curtained around them as his dazed eyes moved to center their focus on her face, which was full of concern and flushed with embarrassment.
Ignoring his statement, she pulled off her gloves impatiently and moved her fingers into his hair searching for blood. If there was blood, she knew that she'd faint right on top of him. There was none, thankfully, and he was also very conscious, so that ruled out a concussion. He had been watching her fuss, saying nothing.
She glanced back to him. For an instant, she saw a bare streak of desire in the green eyes that touched every part of her face. The look was both charged with tension and as gentle as growing fondness.
And then an older man approached, offering his assistance and breaking the spell.
The man helped her to feet. Edward got up by himself, regaining his balance easily and straightened his jacket.
Bella thanked the man and he skated off, continuing his path along the ice.
They made their way back to return their rented skates.
"I'm really sorry. But I did warn you... Are you sure you aren't hurt?"
He chuckled and moved to let her pass in front of him. She gratefully sat down on the bench and unlaced. "I didn't want to be left out of the falling down. Why not go out with a crash, right?"
She slanted a glance at him, working on the second set of laces. "Now you're the one soothing my ego."
"Maybe I am," he said, working his skates free beside her. "But if I hadn't been... distracted, I might've steadied you in time. We can still look at the lights from the sidelines while we recover."
He was right for them to stop. Once she was out of the skates, her legs felt very wobbly. It was good to go back to the stable land of concrete.
They took in the late afternoon air, watching the other skaters continue below the brilliant Christmas glow and front-lit buildings.
Edward was happy that she had enjoyed herself so much. "What are you in the mood for?"
She recalled a sandwich shop nearby that she liked very much. The place had a mean turkey club, with real roasted turkey breast and crisp bacon. Suddenly she felt ravenous. "I know the perfect place."
He let her lead, and they held hands to storm the crowds together. It was quickly becoming their habit of the day. They ordered their sandwiches and sat inside to warm up over coffee. They weren't the only customers who thought the place was terrific, and it began to get busy. After they finished eating, they strolled outside again, braving the chill, and settled on the marble steps of a business building. Edward leaned back on the step behind him and looked out at the view of Rockefeller Center and the avenues in between.
A strange interval of time arrived in which the crowded streets thinned. There were still some shoppers taking advantage of the later hours stores provided during the holiday, but most people were starting to pack up and go home for the evening. The nighttime partiers hadn't yet surfaced.
"It's strange, isn't it? Knowing each other," he said suddenly.
Bella was leaning forward, her elbows resting on her knees. She looked over her shoulder at him. His usual, easy-going good humor had shifted into something more serious, which surprised her, yet it was fitting for the moment.
"I suppose it is." She took off her knit hat and shook out her hair before putting it back on. "I've been wanting to know something..."
"Who it was for?" he said in a calm voice. "My ex-girlfriend." Then he laughed and it sounded strange to his ears. It made Bella look at him again, and he smiled without humor.
"About a month ago, I was digging around in my closet for a specific tie because we were having a Fun Tie Day theme at work. I remembered that my mom had given me one as a gift. I'd tossed it into the closet without a second thought. Don't look at me like that, Bella. It really was a hideous tie. Plaid with penguins all over it. Who knows what made her give it to me.
"It turns out that I stumbled on the dress instead. I don't know why it was mixed in with my things; we haven't seen each other in almost a year. I have to be honest, when I saw it back there, my first thought was to burn it. Not out of residual anger, but more of a childish, mischievous notion. But I realized that it would've only given me a few satisfying, but ultimately empty, moments.
"Anyhow, I eventually got back in touch with my better self and thought maybe Tanya was genuinely missing her dress, so I shipped it to her. No note was required; she'd know who it was from and that it was just an act of simple courtesy. Obviously I didn't know she had moved. There was no reason for her to tell me. We haven't been in touch at all."
He was a little paler than usual, and looked at Bella intently. He tried not to care about what she thought but failed miserably. Would she want to know why they had broken up? Try to find out if there was something wrong with him that caused the relationship to fail? Judge him for wanting to burn the dress? Her expression was burning with a question.
"Did you ever find the tie?"
This was the first out of two times in their acquaintance that Edward would be reduced to a speechless state. After a few moments, the color rushed back to his face. He scooted down a step so that they were almost eye level.
He reached out, drew his thumb along her jaw.
Her pulse doubled, and she stared at him. His eyes were more brilliantly alive and vibrant than the Christmas lights glowing around them. "No. I never found that damn tie," he said.
The optical hold he had on her was potent and wildly searching for...something. It was too much to receive all at once. Her eyes fell. His finger lightened its touch along her jaw and turned dutiful, tucking a stray tendril of hair behind her ear.
Despite the chilly December air, her face was burning. Her whole body felt overheated. She didn't know why she had held back just now. When she glanced up again, she saw his profile; he had turned back to view the city scene. The sudden urge to kiss him was so great that she dug her nails into her palms to keep from reaching for him.
Oblivious to her internal struggle, he interpreted the moment in a different way. "So that's the story. Do you have any exes I should worry about?" His voice had regained most its usual humor, if still a little taut.
"No." She smiled faintly. "I'm sure my mother wishes any of them still cared enough to rush to my rescue—not that I'm in any danger. She always looks so disappointed when things don't work out. I tell her it's not easy on my end either." Weary sarcasm had drifted into her tone.
"It never is," he agreed. "So, what now, B? My evening is open, although I could lie and tell you a party with provided limo service awaits me somewhere."
She laughed and jabbed him in the side with her elbow. "I actually have a gala to get to and schmooze important people over hors d'oeuvres and French champagne, but I guess I can free up my night for you."
He blew some warmth into his hands and rubbed them together. Then he stood, extending his hand to help her to her feet. "That's good of you. If either of us bore each other, we can crash one of our supposed events. C'mon."
She called Alice and told her she wasn't going to make the movie. But, of course, Alice already knew this.
Happy Valentine's Day, Lovelies. One more part left!
I've had my own thrills. Last week on a vacation in Hawaii, my boyfriend proposed to me. It was amazing. :)
Thanks to my beta kimpy0464, and to dollegirl for her encouragement. And thanks to you for reading. Any errors are mine.