Chapter Three: A misunderstanding of interests
Boa walked with her head bowed as they entered the Twilight palace. She tied to ignore the strange looks she received from the servants, having seen her leave with one man and return with another.
"This certainly is a change," Carrion said leading the way with his steps always being slightly ahead of hers.
"I'm sorry?" Boa asked aware that even though they were inside she was still holding his arm. She should have let go at the door, but she had been too distracted, and it would seem rude if she was to pull away now.
"You usually cannot wait to get away from me, I am hard pressed to imagine this transformation is of your own doing," Carrion said in a voice that Boa had to consider before she could understand if it was in jest or not. Even after a few seconds of silence, Boa still didn't know.
"I don't understand you my Lord," Boa said bringing them to a stop in the empty hallway.
"Did daddy tell you stop avoiding me?" Carrion asked cruelly making Boa frown.
"No," she answered puzzled. "Why would you think that?"
Carrion smiled in a forced way, which didn't look very friendly at all. Clearly he was trying to keep his words calm, as Boa could see he desperately wanted to say something but was trying to find a politer way of phrasing it.
"You obviously do not wish to be walking down this hallway with me. I know you take delight in avoiding me at every opportunity; I will not spoil that for you. You have only walked with me so far because you hope that by doing so it will prevent me from telling your father about your little outing with Hobb."
Boa gasped and snatched her arm from him instantly. How could he know so much truth, yet be so wrong at the same time?
"You make me sound heartless!" Boa said, tears at the back of her eyes. From the shock of his words her voice became nothing but a strained whisper.
Carrion sneered, took a step away from her and then stopped and turned back.
"You have humiliated me too often Princess. I am here to see your father, I bid you good day," he said bowing to her in a mockery of everything she was and then continuing to walk along the hallway.
"Christopher don't!" she called after him. She didn't know what she meant by 'don't'. Don't walk away, don't tell my father, don't hate me? But it was the only word that would come to her.
As soon as Carrion was too far away to be called back, even should she scream, she heard a noise behind her, belonging to the last person she wanted to see at that moment.
"So," Finnegan said his arms folded and his legs crossed casually as he leant against the wall behind her. "Christopher now is it?"
Boa didn't understand why Finnegan was speaking in such a sarcastic tone. It wasn't forgivable like when Carrion used it. Usually when Carrion spoke Boa felt she deserved it, but Finnegan was only causing her distress. She wished Finnegan would stop looking at her like he was.
"It's always been Christopher, I've known him since we were children," Boa said. It sounded simple to her, surely Finnegan would understand now.
"I thought you said he was nothing to you now?" he asked taking a step forward. When he saw Boa back up he stopped. He hadn't meant to frighten her, even if he was angry.
"Well he isn't!"
"Then why call him by his first name?" Finnegan demanded.
A pair of chambermaids, who had found themselves in that part of the castle at that particular moment, stopped in the hallway and stared at them, waiting for Boa's answer.
"Because," Boa began uncertain. She didn't really know the answer, she didn't do it intentionally, it just came out of her mouth when he wouldn't answer to anything else. "Because sometimes it's all I can do to make him listen to me!"
"Well it didn't work this time did it?" Finnegan said spitefully.
"Why are you being like this? You know you are everything to me Finnegan," Boa said quietly so that the listeners wouldn't hear.
"What was your next move Princess? Let's say I didn't find you after you were shamelessly calling 'Christopher' for all to hear, what would you have done next? Run after him?" Finnegan shouted flaying his arm in the direction Carrion had walked in.
"I don't know," Boa answered honestly. "And you didn't answer me Finnegan."
"You want to know why I am angry with you? Well let me tell you Boa. You slighted me in front of Carrion. A man I despise more than you will ever know! A man who threatens to take you from me!"
At this Boa laughed, it seemed too ridiculous not to be joke. She didn't understand why he was upset, by all accounts it seemed to be his pride that was hurt not him. But Finnegan wasn't amused by her laughter, the harsh look on his face made Boa feel stupid and then angry.
"This is all pride!" she accused him. "Well I am sorry if your ego took a dent Finnegan, but I don't think that should be any concern of mine."
Finnegan scowled and turned his back on her. But Boa wouldn't call him back as she had done Carrion. She wouldn't wait for him to leave either, but turned around herself and walked in the direction Carrion had gone. Her purposeful steps showed everyone that she wanted no company. She didn't care if Finnegan thought she was going to find Carrion or not, but if he did she felt he deserved to worry after the way he had acted.
Boa stirred her soup round and round the bowl until a servant leant over and took it away. She was about to complain, when she realised everyone's first-course was being taken away.
"Ladies and Gentlemen," King Klaus said standing and raising his glass. "It is, as I'm sure you're all aware, the anniversary of my marriage to my dear wife, your Queen."
There were cheers at this, but Boa blanched and slumped her shoulders forward in an attempt to make herself seem smaller. She'd completely forgotten the reason so many people were at the dinner. It was probably why Carrion had returned too; he'd been forced by duty to return, even though his sense of duty obviously didn't stretch to actually attending the dinner. This gave Boa a scared cold feeling inside her, he had come to see her father after all, he hadn't come back for her.
"And so, please join me in a toast, and enjoy the entertainment I have arranged for this evening," the King said to an enthusiastic applause.
Boa looked around the room, everyone was continuing to eat and drink excessively, the music grew slowly louder, or so it seemed that way to Boa. The more wine that was gulped, the louder the room became until people were shouting at one another to be heard. Boa spotted Finnegan laughing with the men and women on his table, as if he was doing so to spite her.
"Father?" Boa asked dragging him away from his conversation. "Did you speak to Prince Carrion today?"
King Klaus swallowed a mouthful of wine from his glass and nodded.
"Yes, he came to see me today, what a strange fellow he is. Not a word from him in ages, and then he turns up out of the blue! How he knew it was today I have no idea, I didn't send out any invitations. It was supposed to be a small affair this year…"
"Oh," Boa said looking about. "Perhaps he remembered from last year." Boa added trying to turn the conversation back to Carrion without it being too obvious.
"Yes, perhaps he did," he said nodding and smiling at the people who were looking up at them and lifting their glasses.
"He didn't attend tonight," Boa said her voice dripping a octave into sarcasm.
"Well he never does, can't think why," he replied frowning into his glass as he swirled the drink around. "Seemed a little out of sorts today."
Boa choked mid-swallow and set down her glass.
"W-what do you mean?" she asked quickly. "Did he say something?"
But Boa didn't get a reply, as King Klaus was now busy talking to someone else. Boa turned her attention back to the room and realised she had to leave it. She knew exactly what she wanted to do once she was outside, and couldn't wait another moment.
Standing, she nodded to the people who looked up at her, sidled past the acrobats and jugglers and made her way to the main doors. All the way she felt Finnegan's eyes upon her, accusing and questioning as she walked, and as the doors closed behind her she felt immense relief.
As she walked up the corridor, Boa pulled the heavy earrings from her ears, unfastened the garishly gold necklace and undid the clips in her hair. By the time she reached her room all of her sparkling accessories were in her pocket. Locking her bedroom door, Boa debated what to do next.
When she had had the mind to leave the dinner, her thoughts were all about finding Carrion. Now in her room, with the door closed behind her, Boa felt like going to sleep rather than doing anything else.
Not only did she not actually know where Carrion stayed when he was a guest, since she had never before felt the need to go looking for him and certainly never at this time, Boa wasn't even sure he'd receive her anyway. Not only had she angered him, but also he'd had a long journey and was most likely was asleep.
Deciding it was safer just to go to bed herself, Boa began to undress, throwing her dress over the back of the chair and pulling her nightdress over her head. Sitting down in front of her mirror, she brushed the kinks and knots out of her hair and then rubbed sweet smelling moisturiser into her skin. Slumping back in her chair, Boa stared at her reflection.
After tilting her head side to side and pulling faces to see how she looked, Boa frowned and closed her eyes. Her aim was to sit quiet long enough to shake all the thoughts from her mind and think about sleep instead, but she found herself waking to the sound of shouting from the floor below.
Startled, Boa opened her door and peered outside. The weak light from the windows illuminated the metallic bits on picture frames, the grey slate tiles on the floor, and made shadows in corners. There was no one in the hall, and so Boa began to go in search of the noise.
A young looking maid came around the corner in such a hurry, that Boa was forced to the side in order for them not to collide.
"What is happening?" Boa demanded as soon as the shock of having to jump out of the way had subsided.
"Oh Miss!" the maid said curtsying. "They've all had too much to drink. The butler is having a right old go at the horse-master!"
It took Boa a few seconds of thought to understand this, not totally familiar with the girl's terminology.
"Right, well thank you," Boa replied continuing on her journey down the hall. As she walked she passed the library, and seeing a light on inside and the door slightly ajar, Boa looked inside. She observed someone sat at the large writing desk, on one of the many chairs in the room that turned all the way around should you need it to.
Boa knew she couldn't ignore this opportunity, and stepping inside she only managed to get his attention by shutting the large carved wood door and sending an echoing boom around the room.
Carrion looked up from his book, returned to reading, and then, as if he had just processed what he'd seen, looked up again slightly less composed than usual. Boa felt his eyes sweep over her nightdress, or lack of nightdress, for it barely reached her knees or covered her shoulders. It certainly wasn't what she wanted to be wearing for a meeting with Carrion, but she had acted in a hurry and hadn't thought to bring her dressing gown.
"I thought you might be asleep," Boa stated, her back pressed against the cold door.
Carrion's eyes seemed to be stuck on the hem of her nightdress, and Boa felt herself shiver as he shut the book making another echoing thud in the room. She could already feel her face turning red, and was thankful when he decided to stare at her face after looking everywhere but.
"In the library?"
"In your room obviously," Boa replied rolling her eyes.
At this she thought she saw him visibly gulp, the kind of thing that is only ever portrayed in nervousness situations in novels. Then she realised why, as she suddenly took in everything from his perspective. She heard her words in her own ear, and saw her own appearance in her mind.
According to her she had been wandering about the castle, gone to his room hoping to find him abed, in her nightdress. She couldn't have got anymore suggestive had she tried.
"I wasn't suppose to arrive in my nightdress, there—there was a disturbance," Boa said trying to rescue herself from whatever he might have thought of her seconds ago.
"You call that a nightdress? That is the smallest nightdress I have ever seen!" Carrion said a slight smile on his face.
A cross of being embarrassed and angry, Boa couldn't help but retaliate. Even if she knew he was giving her a way out of the embarrassment. Yet she couldn't help but drag it back down.
"How many have you seen?"
There was stony silence in the room now, Carrion continued to stare at her but it wasn't friendly. Far from embarrassing him, she's only succeeded in embarrassing herself.
"Well you can buy me another one if you like," she said into the silence.
Boa grimaced inside herself, she was making this worse, what exactly was she thinking? She might of well asked him to buy her underwear. If she had been alone she would have bashed her head repeatedly into a wall by now.
She couldn't help but picture a family scene of some kind where the line 'Oh don't worry mother, I'm not spending all my allowance on fancy clothes, Christopher bought it for me!' would feature. She couldn't help but think that wouldn't down well.
However Carrion seemed to find that suggestion more palatable than the last.
"Favourite colour?"
Boa just smiled, hoping he would just take it as a joke and not insist upon it. She was feeling very stupid now.
"So," he said reopening his book and picking up his pen before writing something down. "Apart from begging for new clothes, what do you want with me Princess?"
Boa rubbed the side of her neck nervously.
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I've behaved appallingly to you, and I wish that you would forgive me."
Carrion continued to read and made another note.
"Will you not say something?" Boa asked worried.
Carrion looked up at her.
"What am I to say?" he asked.
"Say you forgive me!" Boa insisted stepping away from the door.
"I cannot."
Boa felt the tears forming in her eyes again, she couldn't bear to be hated.
"But why?" she asked tearful sounds in her words. But Boa had the feeling she had pushed him too far, she could feel the room become potent with the sense of expectation. She wasn't wrong either.
"Because I don't want to be your friend anymore!" he snapped, slamming the book closed making Boa jump from the loud sound it made.
He was standing now, but Boa wouldn't back down.
"Then I hate you!" she screamed, tears flooding from her eyes. "I hate you!"
Boa didn't know how, but he had managed to close the distance between them even before she had managed to wipe the tears from her eyes, and without warning he had her pushed backwards into the unforgiving door.
Gasping from the sharp shock of pain she received in the bottom of her spine, Boa found herself kissing him. Or he was kissing her, she couldn't tell. He wasn't gentle with her, he had her pinned and wasn't letting go, no matter the amount of resistance Boa tried to make at the beginning.
It didn't take long before her skin felt too hot, and her body too heavy, like the dizzying feeling of illness when the mind seems detached from oneself. She could feel his tongue on her bottom lip, but she didn't dare move her own. She didn't quite know what to do with it for a start, and rather than worry about what she was doing, she found herself worrying about not being able to do it.
Just as she thought she couldn't embarrass herself anymore with her inexperience, that was most obviously showing through, Carrion released her and stepped away. Boa stared up at him wide-eyed, and her hand slowly went to her mouth in disbelief.
"Go back to your room Boa," he told her his eyes the darkest she'd ever seen them.
Taking a deep breath, Boa turned, fumbled with the handle and hurried out. She wished with her whole heart that she could have someone to talk to that would understand just how she was feeling. But who would understand? Anyone she could speak to would see her as just a stupid girl.
Never had she been kissed like that, with Finnegan it was all giggles and fun. She had been held still, or made to feel so helpless. With nowhere to go, or no one to talk to, Boa had no choice but to wrap her arms about herself and lay down on her bed.
A/N: Ooops that's not the smartest move to make. Poor Boa, I'm starting to feel sorry for her now, yet at the same time, not really.
Ps, would there be such a thing as a 'night'dress in the Abarat? For the lack of a better word I had to use it. The Abarat is a very confusing place….