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Chapter 7 – he thinks he is the loser here…
I hate Thomas so much right now. My muneca cried because of that song. One of the reasons that she did not want to see Thomas again was because she knew that she could never give him children.
"he said the songs are not about us" I said to Esmeralda as she picked up the book
"what! You talked to him" she yelled at me
"I said nothing, trust me. I just asked him what he was doing and he said he was listening to songs Elena gave him" I said and looked at her beautiful green eyes.
"thank God, they are not about us" my love said and I kissed her lips.
"please don't be upset over…it is use, I mean it means nothing to us right" I said
"yes you are right" she said and moved the hand rest and moved closer to me. I hugged he and held her in my arms and she rested her head in my chest.
"this song is bachata..you love bachatta" I said and kissed her hair.
I can tell her to listen because these songs are not about us. I like this type of music.
Hay Un Dicho,No Se Sabe Lo Que Se Pierde...Es La Verdad)
Te Vi Llorar
Viviste La Monotonia
Y Te Escuchaba Hablar,Pero Era
El Que Te Entendia Y Me Robo
Ese Tesoro De Duente,
Y Ahora Comprendo El Valor
Que No Se Tapan Los Defectos
Con Pretextos,Y En Cambio
Siento Rencor
[Coro:]
Ay Ve Y Dile Que Lo Odio
Y Lo Detesto Por Tener Lo Que Fue
Mio,Aunque El Culpable He Sido Yo
Que Hoy,Lo Considero Un Enemigo,
Lamentando Mi Perdida,En La
Batalla Por Tu Amor
Recalcale Que No Duermo De Noche
Imaginando Que En El Sexo El Te
Devora Con Pasion
SHIT! You have got to be kidding me…these songs are so about her.
I translated the song in my head and I knew that my muneca in my arms was doing the same thing. "there is a saying that you do not know what you have until you lose it. I saw you cry and you lived in monotony and I listened to you, but it was him who understood you and he robbed me of that unique treasure, and now I have come to appreciate its value, that faults can't be hidden behind excuses however I feel the and tell him that I hate and despise him for having what belonged to me, even if the one to blame is me
that today I consider him my enemy, and I regret my defeat in the battle for your love remark on him that I can't sleep at night, imagining that he's devouring you with passion in bed..."
Great! So this song has double meaning..to Esmeralda it means that she cried right now and I comforted her. But me and Thomas know that she also cried to him when she saw him in college. But now Thomas, through the song is telling Esmeralda that he hates me and despises me because I have what belongs to him and he says he is to blame. In Esmeralda's head he is to blame because he lied and said he did not love her. However, me and Thomas know that he is to blame because was the one who gave me the poem that Esmeralda has framed in our library and he 'fixed' our lives the way he told me during Martin Luther King's speech more than forty years ago.
In the song he says that he considers me his enemy because now he regrets his defeat in the battle of love. At the end of this verse, the song says and he can't sleep at night because he is imagining me in bed with her.
As that last part, Esmeralda lifts her and looks at me with concern. I just smile at her. "tell me what do to" I ask her.
"nothing..just hold me" my muneca says and forces a smile.
The song continues.
HOW IN THE WORLD DOES THOMAS HAVE THESE SONGS!
Agregale Que Hoy Me Revelo Envidioso,Egoista,Impulsivo Sin
Control Por Creer Que Yo
Era El Unico Que Tu Amarias,
Que Estupido Fulano Con
El Premio Y Yo El Perdedor
I translated the rest to myself. "you can add up that today I reveal myself to be envious, selfish, impulsive with no restraints for believing I was the only one you could love, how stupid!
that bloke won the prize, and me, I'm the loser..."
Well Thomas, you have acted like an envious, selfish, impulsive bastard today.
"well he is acting like a fool…" Esmeralda said and laughed in my arms.
"I know..is he like digging his own grave" I said and kissed her hair
"the song is pretty sad, he is calling himself the loser" Esmeralda mumbled and I hugged her closer in my arms.
Good thing he cannot hear us.
Lo Vi Llegar,
Y No Pense Que Importaria
Y Te Empezaba A Conquistar
Convirtiendote En Mi Enemiga
Y Me Robo Ese Tesoro De Duente
Y Ahora Comprendo El Valor
Que No Se Tapan Los Defectos
Con Pretextos Y En Cambio Siento
Rencor
I translated this part to myself 'I saw him arrive and I didn't give it any importance
when he started to conquer you, turning you into my enemy and he robbed me of that unique treasure, and now I appreciate its value that faults can't be hidden behind excuses however I feel hatred'
Wow…I just smiled and shook my head. He saw me coming and did not think of it much.
"well he gave me up, you did not steal me away" Esmeralda said looking up.
The song ended and a really nice music started. "I like this" I said.
"me too…it sounds like a happy song" Esmeralda said in my arms.
Then the lyrics started and we both laughed. He is way too smart for me, I am really luck that I know that Esmeralda loves me or else, I would be so knocked out of the way.
I Dont Know It Is But (i Love You I Love You I Love You)
I Dont Know What You Do But (i Love You I Love You)
Verse 1:
Oh Baby,
Baby I Dont Know What It Is But You Drive Me Crazy
And Every Time Im Around You Girl It Feels Amazing
And Im On My Best Behavior,
When Im With My Baby, Cuz I Cant Lose My Baby
Chorus:
I Dont Met Alot Girls In My Life But They Not Like You Noo
Ive Been With The Best And Baby You The Best Of The Best You're The Greatest
I Dont Know What It Is But (i Love You I Love You I Love You)
I Dont Know What You Do But (i Love You I Love You I Love You)
I Dont Know What It Is But (i Love You I Love You I Love You)
I Dont Know What You Do But (i Love You I Love You I Love You)
"well you are the best of the best of the best" I said laughing to Esmeralda
She lifted her head and said "Love, I dedicate this song to you…this is our next Let me Love you Al Green song"
I know what she is referring to, we are going to make love to this song "oh yes, tonight" I said and she blushes and laughed and put her head back down.
The song ended and another song started. I just listened and Esmeralda was quite…
There's always that one person
That will always have your heart
You never see it coming
Cause you're blinded from the start
Know that you're that one for me
It's clear for everyone to see
Ooh baby ooh you'll always be my boo
I don't know bout you all
But I know about us and uh
It's the only way
We know how to rock
I don't know bout you all
But I know about us and uh
It's the only way
We know how to rock
Do you remember girl
I was the one who gave you your first kiss
Cause I remember girl
I was the one who said put your lips like this
Even before all the fame and
People screaming your name
Girl I was there when you were my baby
I HATE THOMAS! "god, I hate him" I said to myself. I let ago of Esmerlada and she just look at me. I put the arm rest back down. I looked at her and she turned around and looked out the window. It was night now.
It started when we were younger
You were mine my boo
Now another brother's taken over
But its still in your eyes my boo
Even though we used to argue it's alright
I know we haven't seen each other
In awhile but you will always be my boo
"what the hell does boo mean hu?" I said with anger and Esmeralda looked at me
She laughed and put her hands in front of her face and said "pick a boo"
I was so angry but I laugh anyway. She is so funny. "no…god I hate him. He gave you your first kiss!" said with anger, still mad
"listen to the song, he says 'now another brother's taken over'" Esmeralda says and looks at me and raises her eyebrow
"I hate him, were you thinking about his lips after he kissed you" I glared at her
Her smile disappeared and she looked at me and with a serious tone said "no, I was thinking about his death Nathaniel and then about my broken neck and then how to get out of your hell and then how the hell to get out of our marriage" and picked up her book again.
I was in love with you when we were younger
You were mine my boo
And I see it from time to time
I still feel like my boo
And I can see it no matter
How I try to hide my boo
Even though there's another man who's in my life
You will always be my boo
Yes I remember boy
Cause after we kissed
I could only think about your lips
Yes I remember boy
The moment I knew you were the one
I could spend my life with
Even before all the fame
And people screaming your name
I was there and you were my baby
"shit he says you are still his boo Esmeralda" I said a little louder than usual. I looked at Thomas and his eyes were closed, no expression on his face. He can't hear us.
"you just asked me what boo means..I don't know that that means" she said and laughed
"he gave your first kiss…I wanted to give you your first kiss" I said full of anger.
"well I can't like go back in time and change things now…can I" she said with a smirk on her face
"I hate him so much! God!" I said with frustration
"well think of it this way, he was the first to kiss me and you were the first to sleep with me" Esmeralda said and touched my cheek. I was so mad.
Great another song….
We both listened to it in silence.