5. Seeking solace
Blood.
It had being something he had learned to live with. Something that gave some form of relief to him. Nobody knew he did this to himself.
Nobody asked… Nobody cared.
When he was little he never knew why the blood that run down his arm stopped flowing so quickly. After learning about his burden he knew why.
The Kyuubi was healing him.
After that night he didn't do it again.
Until Sasuke left.
And again blood dripped down onto his bathroom floor.
Why was it that whatever he did was never good enough.
Sure he was strong enough to have a demon sealed in his gut, but he was not good enough to have Kakashi's teaching. To have Sakura as his girlfriend. To bring back Sasuke. To be Hokage. To be acknowledge by his own village as a person. To stop the organization that wanted to take the demon from his gut.
He just wanted to end it.
He just wanted to live his life like the rest did.
He wanted a family that loved him, a mom that cooked his meals, who worried about him, that smiled at him and hug him after he'd had a nightmare. A father who he could make proud, who would help with his training, who would help him with the girls and gave him some advise.
He just wanted to be normal.
Out side a pair of blue eyes watched the scene inside the rundown apartment.
The mission scroll laid on the floor.
Tears were running down pale cheeks.
Her eyes were wide with disbelief.
His name escaped between soft plum pink lips.
The scene before her was one out of nightmares. Naruto. Sweet annoying, loud Naruto was inside his bathroom sitting on a puddle of blood, his expressive and full of light blue eyes were now dull and lifeless. Staring at the blood that flew and dripped from his arm onto the floor.
She Could't believe that that cheerful, full of laughter and naïve in some ways boy was doing something like this.
How many nights had he done the same thing? Did anyone even knew? Did forehead had a clue that her teammate was trying to kill himself?
Just as he was about to make a new cut into his wrist. She snapped and threw herself at the blond boy, retrieving the kunai from his hands and throwing it to a wall away from the boy.
His dull and unfocussed eyes tried to make sense as to where the knife had gone to until he saw her in front of him
Why was she crying?… was she crying… for… him?
"Ino?"
"Naruto what are you doing?, why are you trying to kill yourself?"
"I… I just want… to make it all go away"
"make what go away Naruto?"
"all, all of it. The pity, the glares, the disappointment. The pain… the loneliness, I cant take it anymore"
"what are you talking about?" asked the confused girl
"I mean… that I tried Ino, I really tried. All I've ever wanted was to be acknowledge, for someone to look back and say hey, that guy was awesome I want to be just like him, but all I do is never enough, I won against Kiba, I asked my sensei for help because I knew Neji was strong. But he ditch me for Sasuke, I never asked for anything you know, I knew he needed all the help he could get. But I needed it too. I know Sakura doesn't like me. But I just wanted to make her feel ok after he crushed her again and again by rejecting her. And good damn I try to reason with him to make him come back but it was never enough. I couldn't do it, and I ended up with a fucking hole in my chest. I cant do it anymore, this is all I have left, just let me die Ino. Nobody cares anyway. Nobody is going to miss me"
"I would"
"You're lying"
"No"
"Stop Ino. Just go"
"No. I care Naruto. You cant just give up. Not like this"
"You don't know shit about me. You wouldn't be saying this if you really knew me"
"Naruto don't say that. Sure I don't know you now, but I want to get to know you"
"You don't mean it"
"Stop being so stubborn. I do care. Why do you think I stopped you in the first place. You're my friend, even if I don't know you that well, I know that there are people that really like you, like Shika and Chouji, and Hinata and Shino and Kiba, and lee and Sakura too. don't give up Naruto"
"you mean it? You really mean it?"
"yes baka. Now stop with the pity party and go get clean up, I'll take to the ramen shop, and then go back to pack cause we got a mission to go to. So go, go, go what are you waiting for?"
"you're right. Thanks Ino... for everything".