Beyond Grim And Evil Installment 2: Return To Bunny Island

Beyond Grim And Evil: Return To Bunny Island

(A/N: Third up today. Ghastly's getting desperate to win Hector, Estroy is still obsessed with her. What's a girl to do? With a slip of the tongue, the decisions made for her. Even with Skarr's help, though, will she be able to both win over Hector and get rid of Estroy? Well, as long as screw ups like these don't keep happening it's possible, right?)

Operation Win Hector, Get Rid Of Estroy

"Hector's not evil, just misunderstood," Ghastly stated as she and Skarr walked through the base towards their rooms.

"Get married to him then. At least Estroy will back off a little. That metal head promises to be annoying if something isn't done," Skarr replied. "I don't want my vacation ruined by that pest, Doctor."

She blushed, admitting, "I can't marry Hector. Not yet."

"At the rate he catches on, you never will," Skarr cynically stated.

She pulled her hair and screamed, infuriated, then demanded, "What do I have to do to get through to him!"

Skarr, who had pulled back surprised at the outburst, relaxed once more, smirking coldly. With his regular wry humor, he answered her, acting out the part, "Ah Major, to get that idiot's attention, you'd have to march right up to him, seize his arms, shake him, and scream in his face, 'I love you, you moron. How could you not get that? I've dropped hint after hint after hint, I've endured envy, rejection, belittlement, all the crap you put me through, and somehow you still miss the fact that I'm so ridiculously in love with you I'd crawl on my stomach like a reptile to have you. Marry me you fool, marry me!'"

"Skarr!" a voice exclaimed. Skarr gasped and turned his head, still holding Ghastly's arms, and Ghastly looked up in horror.

"Hector!" she exclaimed.

He looked angry. He'd overheard Skarr's insult, he must have, the two minions panicked. All at once, though, his anger fell to the regular look. "You sly dog, Skarr, I never knew you felt so strongly for the Major Doctor! No wonder you came back," Hector said, nudging Skarr.

"What? No!" Skarr exclaimed. "This isn't what it looks, or sounds, like!" Skarr insisted, dropping Ghastly's arms and turning around.

"It's, uh, a play, yeah. Endsville's town play. Skarr's the main part! He was just practicing!" Ghastly quickly covered. "I was helping!"

"Of course he is, nudge, nudge," Hector said, nudging Skarr again and making the General hold his arm in pain. Boskov began singing 'Here Comes The Bride,' and the two walked away laughing, Stomach joining in.

GAoBaM

"Skarr!" Ghastly screamed furiously.

"I told you what to do, now do it," Skarr stated quickly, backing away.

"I can't now! He thinks you love me! You're gonna help me fix this, or so help me I'll give the Reaper another reason to come after you!" she yelled.

"Keep your shirt on Major Doctor, I'll help," Skarr quickly promised, desperate to pacify the woman as she advanced on him like a predator ready to kill.

She relaxed, and in her normal sweet tone said proudly, "Good." She frowned then, though, asking, "Wait, how did you know I had a crush on Hector if even he didn't?"

"Oh please. Could you be more obvious woman? I'm not that stupid, Ghastly. Hector's an imbecile when it comes to things like this," Skarr replied as if it were obvious.

"Too much, huh?" she questioned, blushing.

"In his case, too little," Skarr assured, walking to the door of his room and waving at her.

"Okay, but keep in mind you're helping me get him," Ghastly warned.

"How could I forget?" Skarr bitterly asked. "I'd kill for a woman to show me as much affection as you do to him. Every time you drop a hint it infuriates me that he can take it willy nilly without a comment. I doubt he even knows it. I'll admit, I'm jealous of you two."

She smiled, saying, "I've missed your cynicism around here."

"Of course you would. It's always fun to watch someone else get hurt, complain about life, all that," Skarr retorted. "Goodnight Ghastly. Tomorrow we can come up with a plan to win him over." With that, he slammed the door. She squealed in excitement. With Skarr's help, maybe, just maybe, she could finally get Hector Con Carne's love!

GAoBaM

Evil Con Carne stood in the lab. Hector then said, "I have come up with a brilliant plan for world domination." He opened a notebook, saying, "Behold!"

Ghastly and Skarr looked blankly at it. After a moment they looked up. Ghastly, forcing a grin, complimented, "Oh, great chief. You're quite the artist." As if. She had no clue what it was.

"Thank you," Hector proudly said.

"Artist? Hah. This is chicken scratch. What is it?" Skarr questioned.

"Maybe you would like to spend time in the dungeon, General?" Hector warned testily, insulted at Skarr's putdown. Skarr grinned innocently, shrugging. "For your information, it's the diagram of a death laser I plan to have Ghastly build for me, once the plans are complete, that is. Observe. We build it, then we lure SPORK here to stop us. When they come, we destroy them, then we move onto bigger fish."

"How will this laser destroy them when no laser we've used before has ever worked?" General Skarr asked.

"Because this laser is special," Hector hinted.

"How so Hector?" Ghastly questioned.

"Ah, that is my secret. When the plans are complete, I'll tell you all about it," Hector answered. He looked to Skarr and frowned. The General was looking around everywhere for something. "Skarr, what are you doing?" Hector demanded.

Skarr snapped back to attention, then admitted, "I'm not sure, sir, but I feel like we're being watched."

"By who? SPORK's given up on us, and Estroy hardly ever spies anymore. The last time was like two weeks ago," Ghastly remarked.

"Yes. What are the chances that the day I come up with a brilliant plan, is the day he's watching us?" Hector said in a carefree tone. Hector and Ghastly laughed. Skarr looked around once more, but then shrugged it off, laughing as well.

GAoBaM

"So, boys, General Skarr's back. Finally. I wonder when he reappeared, and why. About time Hector started getting his motivation back. Thank goodness I decided to give them one last chance to impress me," Estroy remarked, turning to his two sons.

"Does that mean we're going for a visit?" one questioned.

"But of course. It's about time I paid my beloved Ghastly a call," Estroy said.

"I don't know dad, what if she's married? It's been a while after all," the other boy said.

"In two weeks? Unlikely. Con Carne wouldn't catch on that quickly," Estroy stated. "Come on boys, we're off to see Bunny Island. And, of course, examine Con Carne's latest plans." With that, he climbed from his chair and headed out. The boys exchanged glances, then followed.

GAoBaM

"So, what's our plan for winning over Hector?" Ghastly questioned, as she and Skarr walked through the hideout.

"He's your goal, not mine," Skarr retorted.

"Okay. I like your suggestion, but we need to convince him that we're not in love first," Ghastly remarked.

"Easy as pie," Skarr replied.

"What!" she shot, insulted.

"You heard me!" he barked back.

"All right hot shot, what do we do?" Ghastly challenged.

Skarr blinked, then thought a moment. Soon he answered, "Let's stick to the play ruse. We can come up with a fake script and show it to him. Then maybe he'll believe us."

"If he decides to watch the play?" Ghastly asked.

"We tell him it was cancelled," Skarr replied.

Ghastly sighed, face palming as she shook her head, then looked up, saying, "I guess it's the only way."

"Oh good, because I came up with this last night," Skarr giddily stated, handing her a manuscript.

She blinked at it then skimmed it over. Soon she looked up, saying, "This is good. You came up with it? You're really throwing yourself into your plots. If only you'd done as much when you weren't retired."

"Hey!" he shot, proud smile falling to anger.

GAoBaM

Just then a voice cut in, saying, "Why Major Doctor Ghastly. A pleasure to see you again."

Ghastly gasped and whirled, along with Skarr. "Estroy!" Ghastly exclaimed.

Skarr's surprise fell to his usual brooding look, and coldly he greeted, "Estroy."

"Skarr. What's the matter? Couldn't even handle retirement?" Estroy retorted.

"Metal head," Skar grumbled.

"Baldy," Estroy retorted.

"What are you doing here?" Ghastly demanded, cutting in.

Estroy blinked at her, then replied, "Why, visiting of course."

"I knew we were being watched! I told you!" Skarr shot, pointing accusingly at Ghastly.

"All right already, you were right," Ghastly heatedly replied.

Turning to Estroy again, Skarr accused, "You came for a sneak preview of Hector's latest plans, didn't you?"

"Latest plans? Skarr, I'm hurt you'd accuse me of such a thing. I'm over his second rate inventions. No, I'm here for the hand of the lovely Ghastly," Estroy replied, taking her hand and kissing it. She looked appalled. Skarr blinked blankly, then frowned. He kept kissing it until Ghastly put an impatient hand on her hip. Skarr checked his watch. A minute. Soon enough she looked desperately over at the General. He shrugged. Her romantic life wasn't his problem.

Estroy finally moved and began kissing up her arm. She scowled, ready to deck him, but Skarr put up a hand, telling her off. "Allow me," he declared. He suddenly shoved Estroy back and pulled Ghastly away, saying, "That's enough Estroy! She's taken!"

Estroy blinked at him in surprise, then asked, "By Hector? Oh please Skarr. You expect me to believe that disembodied brain would finally catch on to her advances? What kind of fool do you take me for?" Estroy laughed, along with his boys, and Skarr and Ghastly exchanged helpless glances. He had them there. Finally ceasing to laugh, Estroy looked to Ghastly, saying, "Now that I've finally seen you again after so long, my dear, expect me here far more often."

That was when Skarr stiffened up, and his eye began to twitch. He scowled, feeling his blood boil. There was no way Estroy would ruin this vacation more than it already would be by Hector, Boskov, and Ghastly! Angrily he yelled, "I said she's taken! I didn't say by Hector!"

GAoBaM

Estroy fell instantly silent and looked at the two. Ghastly looked equally shocked, then looked to Skarr for clarification, whispering, "Uh, Skarr, who else would I be taken by?" Skarr tensed up, just realizing the predicament he'd gotten into. She was right. Who else would she be taken by?

"Really," Estroy said, sarcasm dripping from the word. "Who, might I ask, is that?"

Skarr began to sweat, saying, "Well, uh, erm, he's, um…" He trailed off, seeing Estroy's smug smirk coming back. His eyes hardened, and he shot, "By me! She's taken by me, alright! Happy now!"

Estroy, his minions, and Ghastly's mouths all fell open, nearly dropping to the ground. Oh boy, he'd have to do some fast thinking to get out of this. "She's what!" Estroy's two sons demanded.

All at once his brilliant-hah, hah- mind, came up with the solution. He became bold, declaring, "That's right. You see, Estroy, the time came for us to do something drastic about you. Since Hector was clueless, what could he do to remedy it? So we figured, why not? If it'll get rid of you, or at least slow you down, it'll be worth it. So we got married, tied the knot."

"Impossible!" Estroy yelled.

Skarr cut him off, though, saying, "You see, my little friend, you don't have her heart. You'll never have her heart. Neither will I. It will always belong to Hector. However, Hector doesn't know that, and both she and I were through with your stalking. We knew you wouldn't stop as long as she was unattached."

Catching on, Ghastly continued, "Oh, y-yeah, yeah. I couldn't suggest it to Hector, and even if I did, with my luck he wouldn't even get it. I told Skarr, and he suggested this. Whatever it is."

Putting an arm around Estroy, Skarr said in mock sympathy, "I know it's hard to understand, but we've lost out on her love. Only you, however, have lost out on her." Defiant tone returning, he went on, "She loves Hector, she's married to me, and you're just the desperate little man who wants her but can't have her, no matter what you do. I know you're not one to exert a lot of energy trying to win a battle you know you'll lose. This way it's sealed. If Hector ever falls in love with her and wants to marry her, we can divorce. If he doesn't, she still stays close to him. Even if Hector dies, she'll still be with me, and she'd prefer me to you any day, because that's just how annoying she finds you. Besides, she'd still have the opportunity to love someone else again. If that happens, we divorce. So there! See the plans, for all I care. Then you can leave and never come back!"

GAoBaM

"Nice," Ghastly whispered.

"Thank you," Skarr proudly said, surprising even himself with the spontaneous plan. Maybe Jack's tips had rubbed off on him.

Estroy, though, finally frowned coldly. He asked in a menacing tone, "Oh yeah? And what if you suddenly die?" He drew a large laser and pointed it at the General. Skarr stiffened and blinked. He could find nothing to say.

"Oh, I walked right into that one," Skarr finally remarked.

As the laser was charging, Ghastly swiftly stepped in front of Estroy, saying, "That's enough Estroy! Break it up! Whether you kill him or not doesn't matter. See, Skarr made Hector promise that if he ever died, Hector would marry me. He said it jokingly, of course, but Hector signed the contract. Now he's bound to it."

"A modern woman like you allowing herself to be passed around like that?" Estroy demanded, instantly suspicious.

"Better to get the man I love and have him be forced to marry me than go to you again," Ghastly retorted, putting her arm around Skarr. Skarr blinked blankly, looked at her worriedly, then forced a nervous grin, focusing on Estroy. He hated contact. Nonetheless, he returned the gesture.

"Take off your left gloves," Estroy suspiciously demanded. The two looked curiously at each other, but obeyed. Estroy instantly went to look at their hands. Immediately they realized that they'd walked right into that one too. "I don't see a ring," Estroy said, playing the last card. Skarr and Ghastly straightened up and looked at each other.

Looking back, Ghastly grinned nervously, saying, "It's, uh, being refitted."

"I suppose his is too?" Estroy asked, pointing at Skarr's own hand.

Skarr blinked at it. All of a sudden he pulled off his right glove and removed a pair of rings there, saying, "Oh why hide it Ghastly? It's no big secret anymore. Here, my mother's ring." He handed her one, and placed the other on his left ring finger.

"Oh, I couldn't," Ghastly gasped, taking it and placing it on her finger.

"Of course you can," Skarr grumbled, admiring the second one. "Ah, father's ring. The old man had good taste."

Estroy growled. Finally, though, he said, "Fine, be that way. I'll just look at his plans and be on my way then."

"You know the way to the lab," Ghastly stated.

Estroy harrumphed and walked off, calling, "Don't think this is over yet, Ghastly. I still don't believe you two!"

GAoBaM

As he disappeared, Skarr said, "Good riddance. Now give me back mummy's ring."

"Yeah, yeah, hold your horses," Ghastly said, pulling it. It didn't move. She frowned. "Uh, Skarr, little help."

"Oh for Pete's sake," Skarr grumbled, taking the ring.

He was just about to pull, when a voice said, shocked, "Skarr, Ghastly, why didn't you tell me?"

They looked up, confused, then looked at their position again. They gasped. It looked like Skarr had just put the ring on her finger! They pulled away. Quickly Ghastly said, "Chief, no, it's not what you think!"

"When's the wedding?" Hector questioned, bitterness obvious in his tone as he looked icily at his general.

"Sir, I swear, there is no wedding!" Skarr exclaimed. He stopped suddenly, though. Was that slight distaste he saw in the brain's eyes? He glanced at Ghastly. She was pale. She'd found it as well. Well, this just got better and better. He frowned, annoyed.

GAoBaM

"I'll pay for the wedding of course, Ghastly, if this is what you want," Hector stated, looking to her with confusion in his eyes.

"Oh great Scott, it's just the play!" Skarr yelled, throwing the manuscript at Hector.

"Play?" Hector asked, looking at the manuscript and looking it over. "You were serious?"

"Yes!" Skarr exclaimed. Ghastly sighed in relief.

As Hector skimmed it, they watched him visibly relax. Ghastly and Skarr grinned at each other, giving a thumbs up. "Phase one complete without even being developed," Ghastly whispered.

"Of course. Never doubt me my dear Ghastly," Skarr replied boastfully.

"This play, it's so beautiful," Hector remarked, sniffing. Boskov began to cry.

"It is, isn't it?" Skarr replied, smirking with pride. Growing serious once more, though, he added, "Oh, incidentally, sir, Estroy is in the lab looking over your plans."

"What! How dare he!" Hector exclaimed, racing off.

"Thanks Skarr, for all of this. I owe you big," Ghastly said.

"I plan on using that to my advantage," Skarr replied, looking at his watch again. "Come on. We have work to do."