HAPPY 1st BIRTHDAY "THE WINNING LOSERS"!
IMPORTANT: The chapter right before this one somehow changed, so the beginning scene with Zoisite and Ami was cut out. Thankfully, I've corrected this mistake. Please go reread it if you did not see that part!
Disclaimer: I do not own Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon. I've said this fifteen times already. Yes, I am a chronic liar, but no, I do not want a lawsuit. I don't even own a suit! All I have are old jeans and oversized t-shirts. But back to the point, I own nothing but this particular story.
Author's Notes: This chapter will have its comedic moments, but it will lean more toward the romantic aspects of my story. I think that's a first…
And for my editor, I've included some more Mina and Kunz action.
This chapter is dedicated to those few and precious people who read and review my little fanfic. Many of you are also busy writers, but you still take the time to send your words of encouragement, and nothing is as thrilling as the support of one's peers. Thank you all for your dedication and patience.
' denotes thought
AN: =author's notes
denotes mental messages
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The Winning Losers
Chapter 15: Sleeping Beauty
A ruby locket. Laughing children. A balcony.
"I'm sorry…"
Trumpets blaring. A sword. A thermometer.
"The perfect what?"
A crowded ballroom. Candles. A featherbed.
"Please, listen to me!"
A white glove. A white lily. A white ribbon.
"Mother would never have done this to me!"
A punching bag. The Lunar Gardens.
A dark-haired man. A parade. Nameless officers.
"Why did you do it?"
"Because of you."
An orchestra. An empty hallway. A nurse.
The Lunar Ballroom. Twilight Bastion (AN: Rei's home).
"I made a promise, and you can't stop me from keeping it!"
And then everything suddenly stopped. Gone was the insane rally of voices, and the seizure of arbitrary visions ceased its maddening rush. Rei, most thankfully, drifted into a cradle of sheer obscurity, where she was welcomed by a dreamless sleep. A soothing lullaby of silence ensued.
Suddenly, the first golden light of spring broke through the wall of black mist, revealing a fertile valley of vermilion soil. In the concave center of the landscape, a colorful spectrum of carp swam against the taunting currents of a glistening river, and along the course of the crystalline water grew a perfect forest of grand cherry trees. The pliant branches danced to the quiet song of the fragrant wind as their small cherry blossoms hovered downward in a pastel pink snow, blanketing the rich earth with velvety petals.
'Where am I?'
Rei found herself lying beneath the umbrella of cherry blossoms, and her face was resting against the soft red ground. 'This is Martian soil. I'd know it anywhere. But… how the hell did I get back home?' Filled with curiosity, she slowly stood up to brush the petals from her gown, but surprisingly, there were none. With the heavy rain of cherry blossoms, it was odd that none of them clung to her. She decided to test her suspicions by holding out her fair hand, and sure enough, the falling petals passed right through her. 'So the divine spirits have actually put me into a vision, but what do they mean by doing that?'
Instinctively, she followed the sound of rushing water and found the little river full of carp. She studied them as they struggled against the current, and after a moment's contemplation, she elected to walk in the opposite direction. Symbolism was everything. She did not want to be like the fish that swam against the current and got nowhere. Instead, she would go with the flow of nature.
"What's wrong with her, Lady Mercury? What happened?" asked an addled and anxious Jadeite. It was ridiculously hard for him to speak coherently, but he managed to construct and verbalize two sensible sentences. When he had dashed to the infirmary with Princess Mars in his arms, his legs were unstoppable, but now he could barely stand up straight. Rei was lying limply on the hospital bed, and Ami was fluttering about her, examining the dilation of her pupils, the rhythm of her pulse, her body temperature, and her brainwaves. Although Doctor Mizuno was behaving as professionally and calmly as she always did, she was beside herself with fretfulness. Minako, Makoto, and Serenity shared the exact same sentiments. Endymion frantically paced up and down the room, and the Shittenou sat to the side in mute solemnity. They were by no means fond of the Senshi, but they weren't mercenary either. Luna, Artemis, and the elder royals were ignorant of Rei's condition, and the occupants of the infirmary agreed that it was best that they remained so for as long as possible.
Ami ran her hand through her short blue hair to hide its slight trembling. "Rei-chan displays no sign of physical abnormality, except…"
"Except what?" questioned Minako nervously.
"Her brainwaves are off the chart, and I have no idea how to rouse her from her current state of unconsciousness," Ami finished dejectedly. She turned to face Jadeite. "Lord Amerveille, please tell us exactly what happened before Rei fainted."
Gathering his wits together, Jadeite accurately related the incident beginning from the time he encountered her in the woods to the time she inexplicably fainted. When he recounted the part when Rei used her magic to torture him, the girls looked surprised and exchanged worried looks with each other, but they saved their comments until after he was done speaking.
Zoisite was most intrigued in the report. "You say you saw her go into a powerful trance after the flash of red light?"
"Yeah, and when I tried to shake her out of it, her muscles were clenched so tightly that she was as stiff as a bronze statue."
Zoisite nodded in understanding. "I see. That could only mean that she was having an involuntary vision, or what the Martians call a 'message from the gods'. Only the high priestess of the Aresian faith, meaning the crown princess of Mars, can receive this divine communication."
"Right," agreed Ami. "Lord Aufait has obviously acquainted himself with Martian history and culture." She acknowledged that he was capable of something other than chasing women and annoying the hell out of her. "Rei's present brainwave pattern is an astounding singularity, which could only mean that she is having a vision as we speak. But even when the waves return to normal, she may not wake up."
As the group digested the details, Makoto, a little hesitatingly, asked, "Was Rei-chan very… violent… when she unleashed her magic on you?"
"She looked like she was going to kill me," confessed Jadeite.
Kunzite crossed his arms and looked questioningly at her. "Why do you seem so surprised, Lady Jupiter? It's not the first time that Lady Mars has illogically lost her fierce temper."
"It's not the first time," Minako agreed, "but it's the first time in a long time."
Reaching over, Minako lovingly patted Rei's cool hand. "I've known Rei-chan since we were babies, and although I call her one of my best friends, I consider her more as my sister. I admire her for her strength and dignity." Smiling, she continued, "She's always been a headstrong girl, and she's passionate in expressing her emotions. I learned quite early that she's a force to be reckoned with, and when she's mad at you, she'll find a unique way to show it. We're all guilty of losing our cool every now and then, but Rei-chan started to lose some control of her temper after her seventh birthday. Everyone initially thought it was some childhood phase and that it would pass, and nothing would be out of the ordinary for long periods of time. But when we'd least expect it, someone would provoke her into blowing things up or setting them on fire."
Makoto picked up the story from there. "One of the worst cases happened when she was ten years old. All of us girls were playing in the marketplace and disguised in civilian clothes so we wouldn't attract attention. A pickpocket tried to steal my wallet, and when we confronted him, he called his accomplices to even the score. In the middle of a heated argument, one of them pushed me into a bush. I'll never forget the look on Rei-chan's face. If you didn't already know, she's incredibly protective of her loved ones. Her eyes looked darker than I had ever seen before, and a shadow seemed to come across her face. Suddenly, all the windows in the street shattered, and the next thing we knew, the pickpockets were sent to the hospital in critical condition. After that, we knew it was not just a phase."
"From then on, her mother, the late Queen Azalynn the Great, performed fire readings every night," Ami persisted, "but no answer was revealed until after you guys visited us eight years ago. In fact, the last time Rei-chan unleashed her rage was when you last came to the Moon, but that time was a lot less serious than other times."
"So the explosive Rei Hino that we met eight years was not the real one?" posed Nephrite.
"Yes… and no," said Ami. "How can I clarify? Well, all those pranks and schemes were devised by the 'real' Rei-chan, but the 'possessed' Rei-chan was the one who actually put them into action."
"That was the only time we thought it was funny," interjected Makoto. The Shittenou scowled.
"One year later," Ami went on, "her mother passed away, and the volatile Rei-chan that you came to know never emerged again. Until now."
The Shittenou listened with the utmost interest, and Jadeite recorded every word in his brain. Endymion was in shock, for he couldn't believe that he was never aware of this information. "How come no one told me this? How come I never knew?" They waited impatiently for Ami to resume her explanation.
"It was only after you left that we learned about Rei-chan's true situation." She paused for a second to look compassionately at Rei's motionless body. "She is one of the many reincarnations of the first oracle of Mars, the most powerful priestess in Martian history. According to legend, the reincarnation of the premier oracle is born with all the power of her past life, but it cannot fully be realized until she becomes queen. Only the priestess with the purest heart and the strongest spirit will live long enough to see that day. However, the power is so intense that it can possess and destroy its own keeper before she ascends the throne. One cannot possibly predict when it will commandeer the keeper's negative emotions and multiply them a hundred-fold."
"All previous incarnations, twenty-two in total, have died before they were crowned queen," added Serenity. "Some princesses committed suicide to stop themselves from inflicting further damage. Others spontaneously combusted. The rest had to be executed because the power turned them evil. The premier oracle spent hundreds of years mastering her dangerous art, but imagine how that same amount of magic would affect a young woman. Rei-chan has demonstrated amazing fortitude in her struggle to avoid the same fate of her predecessors. She fought the evil of her massive power and transformed it into good. She wrestled it every day and was successful for eight straight years. Yes, Rei-chan has always been sarcastic and impish, but above all else, she's kind, graceful, witty, and loyal."
The winding river finally led Rei to a pretty red bridge that arched over the water like a rainbow. The solitary figure of a tall, fair-haired, armor-clad man stood in the middle. Even from far away, Rei instantly identified him. 'Jadeite Amerveille. And here I though that this vision had a meaning to it. Even in a dream, he bothers me.'
Jadeite appeared to be waiting for someone. Then out of nowhere, a woman in a billowing gray cloak ran past Rei towards the bridge. The woman's face was hidden under a heavy hood, but Jadeite seemed to recognize her immediately. She jumped into his eager embrace and wrapped her arms desperately around his neck. His keen cobalt eyes softened into a deep, tender look, and he caressed her concealed cheek. Holding her close, he lowered his head to give her a long, fervent kiss, and their lips never separated until both ran out of air.
Rei didn't know whether to pity the woman or pity herself for having to watch them. "What kind of woman could fall for a thing like that?" The absurdity of the anonymous girl made her chuckle. "Be lovers with Amerveille? I'd rather go lesbian with Neptune and Uranus."
The protective hood of the cloaked lady fell away, and Rei felt like someone had kicked her hard in the stomach. She staggered backward in disbelief, shaking her head violently from side to side. *She* was the woman kissing Jadeite. *She* was the one who clung so zealously to him. This whole time, Rei had been laughing at herself.
If she weren't already unconscious, she would have fainted dead away.
The infirmary was quiet for a lengthened time. The girls felt a little guilty about betraying Rei's secret, but the truth was the only way to defend the claim of her natural goodness. She forever regarded her condition as a weakness and hated for people to know about it, yet none of the room's occupants shared her opinion. Jadeite gazed long and thoughtfully at her prostrate form.
Endymion brought them all back to the matter at hand. "Thank you for telling us what Rei refused to divulge," he said earnestly, "but now we have to find a way to awaken her before the elders find out and get sick with worry."
"Yes," said Ami, rummaging through the card catalogue of her cerebral library. "Her guardians might know what to do. Mina-chan, could you call Phobos and Deimos on the pictocom?"
Minako was in the process of typing in their contact number when the porcelain face of a brunette angel zapped onto the screen. "Phobos!" she exclaimed in astonishment. "I was just about to--"
"I know," replied the beatific figure, "and I'm Deimos, not Phobos."
Minako apologized sheepishly. She had known Rei's guardian twins for as long as she had known Rei, but she still couldn't tell them apart for the life of her. How Rei was able to distinguish them amazed her to no end.
"Phobos and I already know all the circumstances concerning Rei-ko," asserted Deimos.
"But how?"
The guardian smiled enigmatically. "What kind of spiritual guardians would we be if we do not know everything that happens to our charge?"
"True. Now if you would be so kind as to - HEY!"
Zoisite had shoved Minako to the side to have a word with the ethereal dark-haired beauty. "I don't think we've ever been properly introduced, my lady. I'm Zoisite Aufait. You might have heard of me. I'm King of the Eastern Hemisphere of Earth. How do you do? I like poetry and taking long walks on the beach--"
Kunzite, mortified by his general's lack of propriety, whacked him in the head with crutches and dragged him away by his collar.
Minako cleared her throat. "As I was saying, how can we get Rei-chan back to normal?"
"The only way to revive her is to give her an antidote that is created from the roots of an exceptionally rare Venusian plant called promithicus. After you retrieve those roots, follow the cooking instructions that I am going to send to Ami-chan, and use a syringe to get it directly into Rei's bloodstream. But do not give her the antidote until her brainwaves return to normal. She should come around in a few seconds after the substance is injected into her system. Please work quickly, and be careful."
"Thank you!" exclaimed the girls, and the pictocom reverted to a blank screen.
"I'm going to Venus to get that plant," Minako declared.
Makoto, Endymion, and Serenity volunteered to accompany her. Minako shook her head. "Endymion and Serenity must stay in the palace at all costs. I will not risk the lives of our future heads of state. Mako-chan, since Ami-chan must stay here to monitor Rei-chan, you're the only Senshi left to act as our princess's bodyguard."
"Then allow me to escort you," Kunzite offered. Minako's eyebrows shot up into her hair. "As leader of the Shittenou, I see it as my personal duty to be of service to our neighbors of the Silver Millennium. Furthermore, Lady Mars is the close friend and cousin of our prince. My men will stay and help the Senshi in case an emergency occurs in our absence." His explanation satisfied Minako, and the matter was settled.
Taking off her round blue earring, Ami handed it to Minako. "Just press on it, and the graphic visor will appear. And take my handheld computer. They will both help you find and identify the plant."
"Okay. King Acoupser and I probably won't be back until after dinner, so all you staying in the palace must come up with good excuses to cover up this mess." The transformation stick crested with the symbol of Venus appeared in her right hand. "Venus Crystal Power!" she shouted.
"Is it necessary to shout?" whispered Nephrite to Kunzite. The latter shrugged his shoulders.
Out of thin air, gold ribbons wrapped themselves around her, and in a burst of sparkling stars, her princess gown was replaced with the infamous sailor uniform. Zoisite stopped rubbing the lump on his head to ogle the tight white bodysuit, the cute blue-violet bow on her chest, and the short, pleated orange skirt that exposed her long, slender legs. He wedged himself between her and Kunzite. "You know Venus, we probably started on the wrong foot, but I just want to say--"
Endymion punched him in the face to stop him from saying anything. "This is not the time for that, you idiot," he grumbled as he dragged Zoisite away.
Hasty farewells were made, and Minako and Kunzite embarked on their mission. Conjuring a portal, they walked through it and found themselves in the jungles of Venus on the other side. Minako put a hand to her ear and pressed Ami's earring to activate the graphic visor. The weightless blue laser monitor flashed across her eyes, allowing her to analyze her surroundings. She proceeded to open the matching metallic compact computer and type vigorously.
"Exactly where are we?" asked Kunzite.
"The portal transported us to Euphillida Island, which is located in the middle of the Erosian Sea."
The heat and humidity licked at Kunzite's face, forcing him to loosen his cape and unbutton the collar of his uniform. He might have envied Minako, whose uniform consisted of a short and airy skirt and a sleeveless top, but the thought alone threatened his masculinity. The heat was already getting to him.
Reading his thoughts, Minako elucidated: "We're also on the equator, so this area gets a lot more sun during the summer. Did you know that Venus boasts of the highest temperatures in the solar system? It's because of the thick atmospheric clouds that keep the heat in, but I'm so used to it that I hardly notice. But if it becomes too unbearable for you," and she winked mischievously at him as she spoke, "you can strip down to your underwear. Don't worry - we'll keep it between you, me, and these trees."
"Let's just find that damn plant," he growled.
Minako accessed the Mercurian Archives of Information online and searched for information on the promithicus plant. She read the following description: "Promithicus is a perennial herb of the genus Panax, in the family Araliceae. It is native to the rain forests of Venus, primarily along the Cumulus Belt. Believed to have roots of extraordinary healing properties, promithicus has been uprooted to near extinction. It is estimated that there is one promithicus plant for every 2.5 million acres of forest. During the summer season, it grows blossoms with vibrant purple and orange corolla."
Whenever they came across a flower that matched the physical description, the graphic visor would flash and the mini computer would beep, but upon further analysis, they would discover that they were mistaken. Nevertheless, they were optimistic, and Minako indefatigably continued to scan the area and follow the directions on the screen. Mile after mile, they trekked through the uncomfortable wilderness, the only sounds being the flapping wings of wild birds, the rapid typing on the diminutive keyboard, and the contemplative voice of Minako as she muttered bits of information. Then all of a sudden, the visor and the computer went blank.
"Shit! You've got to be kidding me!"
"What? What's going on?"
"My equipment went dead!"
"Are you sure you didn't accidentally press 'off'?" he asked skeptically.
She glared at him. "Are you calling me a ditz?"
He declined to answer.
Momentarily forgetting his implied insult, Minako frenetically tried to reboot the system, but she never got past the wretched blank screen. "Ami-chan's computers are connected to her supercomputer on Mercury. Something must be blocking the transmission."
"So how are we supposed to find what we're looking for now that are only tools are useless?" inquired Kunzite, fatigued and disgruntled. "I knew I shouldn't have relied on your people's technology."
Minako was irritatingly unruffled. Instead, she pointed triumphantly to her head. "I can always rely on my famous Venusian instincts."
He glowered heavily at her. "I'd rather depend on the broken equipment."
"Oh, stop being a sourpuss. I do remember the last coordinates that the comp gave me before it flat-lined, and if we use the stars as our guide, I'm sure we'll be fine. Before you'll know it, we'll be back on the Moon and Rei-chan will be okay."
"If I had known that we would resort to consulting the stars, I would've rather dragged Nephrite with me instead of you."
"And if I had known that you would be such a whiny bitch, I would've rather taken him, too. Now quit complaining and follow me! We haven't much time!"
Left with no other alternative, he trailed her. They ran for several more miles until they slowed their pace to a walk with the intention of catching their breath. The intolerably warm weather of Venus began to suffocate Kunzite. His mind became a little cloudy, and his tongue, unfortunately, loosened up.
"Why are women so stupid and careless?" he grumbled.
"Excuse me?"
Kunzite quickly checked himself. "Pardon me. Even the hottest places on Earth cannot compete with your planet. I'm not quite myself. What I meant was… Oh, blast. Nevermind."
Being quite exhausted as well, Minako stopped him in his tracks.
"Oh no you don't, mister. You've got Minako Aino curious now, and when Minako Aino gets curious--"
"She refers to herself in the third person? Just forget it, little girl. Don't let your pretty empty head read too much into a meaningless remark."
"If you're trying to distract me with your inane comments, then sorry, you're doing a horrible job. I was going to say, before your unnecessary interruption, that when I get curious, I become indomitably determined to learn what I want to know. So ask your question again before I have to force it out of you." She moved closer to him so that her face was barely three inches from his own, and her eyebrows knitted over her appealing and prying lapis eyes. "I can be very convincing," she purred evilly.
Somewhere in his stoic mind, that small, crude male part of him wondered what naughty things she would do to get precisely what she wanted. The heat had definitely gotten to him. He casually continued their hike. 'Damn hormones,' he cursed. 'I thought those things disappeared by the time I hit two-and-twenty.'
"Since that silly, girlish nature of yours refuses to stop pestering me, I can only surrender to your demand and thus preserve my nerves. I was going to ask you… what drives a woman to obey her instincts, to trust her feelings without a doubt? It's suicide, if you ask me. So why is the female species so negligent of the commodity that we humans like to call logic?"
"If Ami-chan heard you say that, she would have blasted you with a blizzard and turned your reproductive organs into icicles."
"Okay, so there are exceptions to the rule," he admitted, "but I'm speaking in general."
Minako smiled. "Do you know, my dear general, that oftentimes a woman's intuition is more reliable than tangible clues?"
"Rubbish."
"Oh really? Well, take Rei-chan for example. That girl lives on her senses, her feelings, her premonitions, her instincts."
"Lady Rei is another exception."
"How so?"
"She's born with those psychic powers."
"True, but isn't every woman endowed with strong instincts? Granted, the princess of Mars has it to a much greater extent, but all women are born with it, and they're going to use it to their advantage."
"Still, why don't *most* girls use sound reasoning once in a while?"
"I have to answer your question with another question: why don't men think with their mind instead of their groin?"
"That was unfair."
"Aww, does the tin man wish that he too could be affected by physical sensations?"
"Was that supposed to be an insult?"
"Compared to what I really think of you, you might as well take it as a compliment."
"You still haven't quite answered my first question."
She sighed. "I am the Senshi of Love and War. Day in and day out, I cannot help but heed the certain vibes that I perceive. You may scoff all you like, but more than once have my gut feelings saved my life and the people I have vowed to protect. It is truly a shame that so many people, like yourself, are so remotely out of touch with their feelings."
"The brain and the heart are separated for a reason," he pointed out patronizingly.
"Ah yes, but they are housed in the same body, too."
He pondered over her statement for a while, and when he was about to renew the conversation, she slapped him across the face so brutally that he thought his jaw was knocked out of his head.
"DAMN IT, WOMAN, WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"Hehe, sorry! A huge mosquito was about to bite you," she explained, showing him the squashed remains of a nasty insect on her once-clean white glove. She then used her unsoiled hand to wipe off the remnants from his cheek. As she gently rubbed his face, she smiled contentedly at him.
Impulsively, he gazed down at her, temporarily mesmerized by the movement of her hand and the expression in her eyes. "Why are you smiling?" he asked softly.
She glanced at him solicitously. "That was the first time you called me 'woman' instead of 'little girl'."
He was surprised that she would pay attention to such a detail. Apparently, she was, too. "There," she said abruptly, wiping her hands on the moss of a nearby tree. She gave a muffled apology for not knowing her own strength and vaguely suggested continuing their operation. He was more than willing to comply.
Minako barely took three steps before her left leg was sucked into a marshy patch of ground. It caused her to trip, and her arms also got stuck in the greedy, damp mantle. "Step back, Kunzite! It's quicksand!" Now that her hands were trapped, she could not summon her Venus Love Me Chain. She was sinking rapidly, but her body from her shoulders up was still free.
Kunzite reflexively summoned a shimmering plasmatic rope and shot it around the thickest and sturdiest branch of an adjacent tree. Fearlessly, he jumped into the pit of quicksand, grabbed her exposed shoulder with an iron grip, and pulled her out by retracting the rope of energy. When Minako's arms were free, she wound them around his neck, and the rope elevated them to the branch. Kunzite hauled her and himself over the bough, and they rested their backs against the broad tree trunk. "Did I hurt your shoulder?" he asked.
"Is that concern I detect in your voice, or is it a tinge of hope?"
"Be serious."
She tried to raise her arm. "OW! I think you dislocated my shoulder." Kunzite instantly removed his cape to make a sling for her arm.
"I think you're glad that I fell in," mumbled Minako. "It makes you the hero, and you got to mangle my arm."
"I had no other choice!"
"Sure… but really, I'd rather have a banged-up shoulder than die pitifully in a quagmire." She looked meaningfully into his visage. "Thank you… for rescuing me." She smirked. "I guess you're not as useless as I thought you were."
He too cracked a smile. "Don't tempt me to push you back into the quicksand."
"Oh yeah? I'll take you down with me."
"Ungrateful," he sighed, and then his eyes blinked with a realization. "Did you know that you called me by my first name when you warned me to step back?"
"No I didn't!" denied Minako.
"Yes you did! You yelled, 'Step back, Kunzite! It's quicksand!' I didn't believe that we were on such familiar terms," he said in mock disdain.
Her lips curved upwards charmingly. "Well, people have first names, so why not use them?" Kunzite didn't mind at all, and for the first time, they agreed on something on pleasant terms. They were not exactly friends, but they were not enemies anymore either.
Night soon consumed the forest, and Kunzite pulled out a small torch to light their way. Since their last interlude, they had resumed their frenzied sprint, and nothing short of a confrontation with a bloodthirsty beast would slow them down.
BEEP BEEP.
Except for that. The two of them stopped dead in their tracks. Minako pulled out Mercury's compact computer and pushed on the earring. "Alright! System up and running again!" she cheered. The beeping sound got louder and faster. "See? I told you I was leading us the right way. We must be close to it now." She and Kunzite walked slowly, eyes peeled for the promithicus root.
Out of the blue, a long saber was pressed dangerously close to their necks.
"Don't move," ordered a gruff, low voice. Kunzite and Minako exchanged looks, but they did not dare move a muscle. "Now, hands up and slowly turn and face me," commanded the stranger, and they did as they were told.
"Haruka-san?!" cried Minako.
Haruka Tenou, senior officer of the Outer Senshi and princess of Uranus, lowered her sword and smiled crookedly. "Minako-chan? That you? Holy moly, what the devil are you doing in the middle of this jungle?" the tall, elder Senshi asked as she patted Minako's head warmly. Her short, sandy-colored hair swept over her amused and arresting navy eyes, and she crossed her muscular yet elegant arms across her chest. Haruka was certainly an attractive woman, but the way she dressed and behaved made her more handsome than pretty.
"I should ask the same of you," answered Minako, clearly perplexed.
"I'm on vacation. Can't you tell by my getup?" Minako finally observed the baggy button-front shirt patterned with martini glasses and palm trees, the khaki cargo shorts, and the thong sandals. Kunzite thought she was crazy. Minako just laughed.
"Minako-chan, what happened to your arm?"
"It's a long story."
"And if it isn't King Kunzite Acoupser! How have you been, sir?"
"I've been better, but I'm glad to see you again, Princess Tenou."
"Oh, just call me Haruka. So, what are you two kids doing all alone in the middle of nowhere?" she interrogated suggestively. "This is undoubtedly a strange place to have a romantic rendezvous, don't you think? The backseat of a carriage would have been more convenient."
Kunzite and Minako were quick to explain the crisis back on the Moon because, first of all, it was their top priority, and secondly, it distracted Haruka from the rising blushes in their faces. Haruka converted to perfect seriousness and asked to see the tiny beeping computer. "I think what you're looking for might be located at my camp, just a hundred meters ahead," she claimed. She swiftly led the way, and the duo raced after her. Sailor Uranus was a monster when it came to speed, so they reached the campsite a while after her. There, they met up with the other three Outer Senshi.
Michiru Kaiou greeted them affectionately. She was not surprised when they arrived together -- she had seen them in her enchanted mirror. The beautiful water Senshi of Neptune was as cool and graceful as her element, and she was arguably the most refined of the princesses of the Silver Millennium. Her aquamarine hair cascaded down her back like a whimsical waterfall, and her enchanting green blue eyes sparkled like the sea. Unfortunately for the male race, she was the devoted life partner of Haruka, who loved her more than any man ever could.
Princess Setsuna Meiou of Pluto, protector of the Time Gate, stood sedately next to Michiru. Her glossy black hair, which was streaked with an iridescent emerald, swept the backs of the calves, and the light of the campfire complimented her glowing tan skin. Her unfathomable garnet eyes always gave one the impression that she was a wise, old spirit despite her fine, youthful features. She gave Minako a hug and smiled at the king from Earth, but as she performed these gestures, she studied the pair meditatively. Minako caught the significant look, but she knew that Setsuna never shared her knowledge of the past, present, and future, for she had pledged eternal secrecy.
The last of the bunch dozed in her sleeping bag. The young princess of Saturn, Hotaru Tomoe, was the picture of innocence with her mysteriously exquisite heliotrope eyes closed in peaceful slumber and her slim hand resting against her pillow. Her silky, shoulder-length raven locks were a striking contrast to her smooth snow-white skin. It was hard to remember that she was the Senshi of creation and destruction, the mightiest of all the Senshi. With the drop of her legendary glaive, she could obliterate an entire planet, but she preferred to spend her time reading or playing a game of leapfrog.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
The visor finally locked onto a target, and according to its results, the promithicus was supposed to be right where Setsuna stood.
"Well, Setsuna, I guess we're going to have to squeeze those medicinal juices out of you," Haruka chortled.
"I am quite sure that I am not a weed," affirmed Setsuna placidly.
"Off course you're not, otherwise the natives of the island would have already smoked you."
"Haruka!"
"Kidding!"
Michiru rolled her eyes. "Setsuna, I think you are standing on the plant," she suggested helpfully.
Setsuna stepped aside, and indeed there was a trampled purple and orange flower. She quickly yanked the roots from the soil and handed them to Minako to verify the authenticity. "We've got a match!" she cried merrily. Tears of happiness welled in her eyes. "Rei-chan will be alright!" Glad that their journey was not in vain, Kunzite joined in her celebration.
The Outer Senshi cheerily expressed their relief.
The volume of their hurrahs disturbed the peace of the sleeping one. Slowly, Hotaru opened her sleepy, adorable eyes and walked over to Minako. She passed a glowing hand over the injured shoulder, and the joints were magically set back in place. Minako moved it around and discovered that it was completely healed. Next, Hotaru quietly toddled back to her sleeping bag and promptly fell asleep.
"When Hotaru-chan wakes up in the morning, make sure to thank her for me."
To be continued…
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Can you believe it? "The Winnng Losers" has survived a whole year!
Happy Dance
I think I deserve a lot of reviews for my measly accomplishment as a sort of birthday gift. I actually enjoy the critical ones! Read the following review, which I have dotingly called "my favorite":
"I really enjoyed some of the jokes that your characters made. They were quite funny and that's what made me keep reading. What made me want to stop was the way you portrayed your characters. Ami is still portrayed as smart and Rei is still portrayed as fiesty. You do what everyone else does. I'm not saying that you can't describe them as that anymore but don't depend on those characteristics in shaping your characters. If you really want me to believe that a character is a human being, then don't stereotype the person in any way (including associating them with the same color). Also, you describe these characters at a very high level, being kings and princesses, etc, but they don't exhibit that kind of behavior. I know that you want to make these characters more human but would kings and princesses really play prank jokes on each other? The point is that I don't think your characters are realistic as princesses and kings in the setting that you placed them. Now, if this was early 21st century Earth, then these characters would be much more believable. Where you set this story is just as important as what you write about."
And what is my response to this? This person is absolutely, positively, one hundred percent correct! My story, "The Winning Losers," is technically outlandish, unrealistic, and unoriginal. I do often associate the Senshi with their custom colors. I have kings and princesses doing obscene and immature things because frankly I'm not talented or intelligent enough to make this a comedy without doing so. Yes, I do portray Ami as "smart" because Naoko Takeuchi, the ingenious creator of Sailor Moon, intended her to be. I have Rei act the way she does because it ties into my story better, but I have somewhat elaborated more on her character in this chapter. However, I do not think that my Ami is just "smart," nor do I think that my Rei is just "feisty." I believe that I have added a different dimension to each character than some other writers, but in my vanity, I'm probably the only one who thinks so. For my amusement (and for a small handful of people), I've created an entirely new universe where modern thought clashes with ancient custom. It's ridiculous and repulsive, as this astute critique so accurately points out, and I am well aware of that. I plead guilty.
Unfortunately, this good critic sent his or her review fourteen chapters late, and now I am too deep in the story to change its course. I will, though, store these suggestions in my memory in case I decide to write other stories. (More stories after this mind-sucking monstrosity? I don't think so.)
So if you are searching for a good, credible portrayal of the Sailor Senshi, this story is not for you. "The Winning Losers" is a burning eyesore of utter nonsense mixed with preposterous scenarios and glutinous slapstick.
But as disastrous as it is, I have grown an irrational fondness of it, and my hard work this past year is a testament of it. ^_^
IMPORTANT: The chapter right before this one somehow changed, so the beginning scene with Zoisite and Ami was cut out. Thankfully, I've corrected this mistake. Please go reread it if you did not see that part!
Disclaimer: I do not own Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon. I've said this fifteen times already. Yes, I am a chronic liar, but no, I do not want a lawsuit. I don't even own a suit! All I have are old jeans and oversized t-shirts. But back to the point, I own nothing but this particular story.
Author's Notes: This chapter will have its comedic moments, but it will lean more toward the romantic aspects of my story. I think that's a first…
And for my editor, I've included some more Mina and Kunz action.
This chapter is dedicated to those few and precious people who read and review my little fanfic. Many of you are also busy writers, but you still take the time to send your words of encouragement, and nothing is as thrilling as the support of one's peers. Thank you all for your dedication and patience.
' denotes thought
AN: =author's notes
denotes mental messages
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The Winning Losers
Chapter 15: Sleeping Beauty
A ruby locket. Laughing children. A balcony.
"I'm sorry…"
Trumpets blaring. A sword. A thermometer.
"The perfect what?"
A crowded ballroom. Candles. A featherbed.
"Please, listen to me!"
A white glove. A white lily. A white ribbon.
"Mother would never have done this to me!"
A punching bag. The Lunar Gardens.
A dark-haired man. A parade. Nameless officers.
"Why did you do it?"
"Because of you."
An orchestra. An empty hallway. A nurse.
The Lunar Ballroom. Twilight Bastion (AN: Rei's home).
"I made a promise, and you can't stop me from keeping it!"
And then everything suddenly stopped. Gone was the insane rally of voices, and the seizure of arbitrary visions ceased its maddening rush. Rei, most thankfully, drifted into a cradle of sheer obscurity, where she was welcomed by a dreamless sleep. A soothing lullaby of silence ensued.
Suddenly, the first golden light of spring broke through the wall of black mist, revealing a fertile valley of vermilion soil. In the concave center of the landscape, a colorful spectrum of carp swam against the taunting currents of a glistening river, and along the course of the crystalline water grew a perfect forest of grand cherry trees. The pliant branches danced to the quiet song of the fragrant wind as their small cherry blossoms hovered downward in a pastel pink snow, blanketing the rich earth with velvety petals.
'Where am I?'
Rei found herself lying beneath the umbrella of cherry blossoms, and her face was resting against the soft red ground. 'This is Martian soil. I'd know it anywhere. But… how the hell did I get back home?' Filled with curiosity, she slowly stood up to brush the petals from her gown, but surprisingly, there were none. With the heavy rain of cherry blossoms, it was odd that none of them clung to her. She decided to test her suspicions by holding out her fair hand, and sure enough, the falling petals passed right through her. 'So the divine spirits have actually put me into a vision, but what do they mean by doing that?'
Instinctively, she followed the sound of rushing water and found the little river full of carp. She studied them as they struggled against the current, and after a moment's contemplation, she elected to walk in the opposite direction. Symbolism was everything. She did not want to be like the fish that swam against the current and got nowhere. Instead, she would go with the flow of nature.
"What's wrong with her, Lady Mercury? What happened?" asked an addled and anxious Jadeite. It was ridiculously hard for him to speak coherently, but he managed to construct and verbalize two sensible sentences. When he had dashed to the infirmary with Princess Mars in his arms, his legs were unstoppable, but now he could barely stand up straight. Rei was lying limply on the hospital bed, and Ami was fluttering about her, examining the dilation of her pupils, the rhythm of her pulse, her body temperature, and her brainwaves. Although Doctor Mizuno was behaving as professionally and calmly as she always did, she was beside herself with fretfulness. Minako, Makoto, and Serenity shared the exact same sentiments. Endymion frantically paced up and down the room, and the Shittenou sat to the side in mute solemnity. They were by no means fond of the Senshi, but they weren't mercenary either. Luna, Artemis, and the elder royals were ignorant of Rei's condition, and the occupants of the infirmary agreed that it was best that they remained so for as long as possible.
Ami ran her hand through her short blue hair to hide its slight trembling. "Rei-chan displays no sign of physical abnormality, except…"
"Except what?" questioned Minako nervously.
"Her brainwaves are off the chart, and I have no idea how to rouse her from her current state of unconsciousness," Ami finished dejectedly. She turned to face Jadeite. "Lord Amerveille, please tell us exactly what happened before Rei fainted."
Gathering his wits together, Jadeite accurately related the incident beginning from the time he encountered her in the woods to the time she inexplicably fainted. When he recounted the part when Rei used her magic to torture him, the girls looked surprised and exchanged worried looks with each other, but they saved their comments until after he was done speaking.
Zoisite was most intrigued in the report. "You say you saw her go into a powerful trance after the flash of red light?"
"Yeah, and when I tried to shake her out of it, her muscles were clenched so tightly that she was as stiff as a bronze statue."
Zoisite nodded in understanding. "I see. That could only mean that she was having an involuntary vision, or what the Martians call a 'message from the gods'. Only the high priestess of the Aresian faith, meaning the crown princess of Mars, can receive this divine communication."
"Right," agreed Ami. "Lord Aufait has obviously acquainted himself with Martian history and culture." She acknowledged that he was capable of something other than chasing women and annoying the hell out of her. "Rei's present brainwave pattern is an astounding singularity, which could only mean that she is having a vision as we speak. But even when the waves return to normal, she may not wake up."
As the group digested the details, Makoto, a little hesitatingly, asked, "Was Rei-chan very… violent… when she unleashed her magic on you?"
"She looked like she was going to kill me," confessed Jadeite.
Kunzite crossed his arms and looked questioningly at her. "Why do you seem so surprised, Lady Jupiter? It's not the first time that Lady Mars has illogically lost her fierce temper."
"It's not the first time," Minako agreed, "but it's the first time in a long time."
Reaching over, Minako lovingly patted Rei's cool hand. "I've known Rei-chan since we were babies, and although I call her one of my best friends, I consider her more as my sister. I admire her for her strength and dignity." Smiling, she continued, "She's always been a headstrong girl, and she's passionate in expressing her emotions. I learned quite early that she's a force to be reckoned with, and when she's mad at you, she'll find a unique way to show it. We're all guilty of losing our cool every now and then, but Rei-chan started to lose some control of her temper after her seventh birthday. Everyone initially thought it was some childhood phase and that it would pass, and nothing would be out of the ordinary for long periods of time. But when we'd least expect it, someone would provoke her into blowing things up or setting them on fire."
Makoto picked up the story from there. "One of the worst cases happened when she was ten years old. All of us girls were playing in the marketplace and disguised in civilian clothes so we wouldn't attract attention. A pickpocket tried to steal my wallet, and when we confronted him, he called his accomplices to even the score. In the middle of a heated argument, one of them pushed me into a bush. I'll never forget the look on Rei-chan's face. If you didn't already know, she's incredibly protective of her loved ones. Her eyes looked darker than I had ever seen before, and a shadow seemed to come across her face. Suddenly, all the windows in the street shattered, and the next thing we knew, the pickpockets were sent to the hospital in critical condition. After that, we knew it was not just a phase."
"From then on, her mother, the late Queen Azalynn the Great, performed fire readings every night," Ami persisted, "but no answer was revealed until after you guys visited us eight years ago. In fact, the last time Rei-chan unleashed her rage was when you last came to the Moon, but that time was a lot less serious than other times."
"So the explosive Rei Hino that we met eight years was not the real one?" posed Nephrite.
"Yes… and no," said Ami. "How can I clarify? Well, all those pranks and schemes were devised by the 'real' Rei-chan, but the 'possessed' Rei-chan was the one who actually put them into action."
"That was the only time we thought it was funny," interjected Makoto. The Shittenou scowled.
"One year later," Ami went on, "her mother passed away, and the volatile Rei-chan that you came to know never emerged again. Until now."
The Shittenou listened with the utmost interest, and Jadeite recorded every word in his brain. Endymion was in shock, for he couldn't believe that he was never aware of this information. "How come no one told me this? How come I never knew?" They waited impatiently for Ami to resume her explanation.
"It was only after you left that we learned about Rei-chan's true situation." She paused for a second to look compassionately at Rei's motionless body. "She is one of the many reincarnations of the first oracle of Mars, the most powerful priestess in Martian history. According to legend, the reincarnation of the premier oracle is born with all the power of her past life, but it cannot fully be realized until she becomes queen. Only the priestess with the purest heart and the strongest spirit will live long enough to see that day. However, the power is so intense that it can possess and destroy its own keeper before she ascends the throne. One cannot possibly predict when it will commandeer the keeper's negative emotions and multiply them a hundred-fold."
"All previous incarnations, twenty-two in total, have died before they were crowned queen," added Serenity. "Some princesses committed suicide to stop themselves from inflicting further damage. Others spontaneously combusted. The rest had to be executed because the power turned them evil. The premier oracle spent hundreds of years mastering her dangerous art, but imagine how that same amount of magic would affect a young woman. Rei-chan has demonstrated amazing fortitude in her struggle to avoid the same fate of her predecessors. She fought the evil of her massive power and transformed it into good. She wrestled it every day and was successful for eight straight years. Yes, Rei-chan has always been sarcastic and impish, but above all else, she's kind, graceful, witty, and loyal."
The winding river finally led Rei to a pretty red bridge that arched over the water like a rainbow. The solitary figure of a tall, fair-haired, armor-clad man stood in the middle. Even from far away, Rei instantly identified him. 'Jadeite Amerveille. And here I though that this vision had a meaning to it. Even in a dream, he bothers me.'
Jadeite appeared to be waiting for someone. Then out of nowhere, a woman in a billowing gray cloak ran past Rei towards the bridge. The woman's face was hidden under a heavy hood, but Jadeite seemed to recognize her immediately. She jumped into his eager embrace and wrapped her arms desperately around his neck. His keen cobalt eyes softened into a deep, tender look, and he caressed her concealed cheek. Holding her close, he lowered his head to give her a long, fervent kiss, and their lips never separated until both ran out of air.
Rei didn't know whether to pity the woman or pity herself for having to watch them. "What kind of woman could fall for a thing like that?" The absurdity of the anonymous girl made her chuckle. "Be lovers with Amerveille? I'd rather go lesbian with Neptune and Uranus."
The protective hood of the cloaked lady fell away, and Rei felt like someone had kicked her hard in the stomach. She staggered backward in disbelief, shaking her head violently from side to side. *She* was the woman kissing Jadeite. *She* was the one who clung so zealously to him. This whole time, Rei had been laughing at herself.
If she weren't already unconscious, she would have fainted dead away.
The infirmary was quiet for a lengthened time. The girls felt a little guilty about betraying Rei's secret, but the truth was the only way to defend the claim of her natural goodness. She forever regarded her condition as a weakness and hated for people to know about it, yet none of the room's occupants shared her opinion. Jadeite gazed long and thoughtfully at her prostrate form.
Endymion brought them all back to the matter at hand. "Thank you for telling us what Rei refused to divulge," he said earnestly, "but now we have to find a way to awaken her before the elders find out and get sick with worry."
"Yes," said Ami, rummaging through the card catalogue of her cerebral library. "Her guardians might know what to do. Mina-chan, could you call Phobos and Deimos on the pictocom?"
Minako was in the process of typing in their contact number when the porcelain face of a brunette angel zapped onto the screen. "Phobos!" she exclaimed in astonishment. "I was just about to--"
"I know," replied the beatific figure, "and I'm Deimos, not Phobos."
Minako apologized sheepishly. She had known Rei's guardian twins for as long as she had known Rei, but she still couldn't tell them apart for the life of her. How Rei was able to distinguish them amazed her to no end.
"Phobos and I already know all the circumstances concerning Rei-ko," asserted Deimos.
"But how?"
The guardian smiled enigmatically. "What kind of spiritual guardians would we be if we do not know everything that happens to our charge?"
"True. Now if you would be so kind as to - HEY!"
Zoisite had shoved Minako to the side to have a word with the ethereal dark-haired beauty. "I don't think we've ever been properly introduced, my lady. I'm Zoisite Aufait. You might have heard of me. I'm King of the Eastern Hemisphere of Earth. How do you do? I like poetry and taking long walks on the beach--"
Kunzite, mortified by his general's lack of propriety, whacked him in the head with crutches and dragged him away by his collar.
Minako cleared her throat. "As I was saying, how can we get Rei-chan back to normal?"
"The only way to revive her is to give her an antidote that is created from the roots of an exceptionally rare Venusian plant called promithicus. After you retrieve those roots, follow the cooking instructions that I am going to send to Ami-chan, and use a syringe to get it directly into Rei's bloodstream. But do not give her the antidote until her brainwaves return to normal. She should come around in a few seconds after the substance is injected into her system. Please work quickly, and be careful."
"Thank you!" exclaimed the girls, and the pictocom reverted to a blank screen.
"I'm going to Venus to get that plant," Minako declared.
Makoto, Endymion, and Serenity volunteered to accompany her. Minako shook her head. "Endymion and Serenity must stay in the palace at all costs. I will not risk the lives of our future heads of state. Mako-chan, since Ami-chan must stay here to monitor Rei-chan, you're the only Senshi left to act as our princess's bodyguard."
"Then allow me to escort you," Kunzite offered. Minako's eyebrows shot up into her hair. "As leader of the Shittenou, I see it as my personal duty to be of service to our neighbors of the Silver Millennium. Furthermore, Lady Mars is the close friend and cousin of our prince. My men will stay and help the Senshi in case an emergency occurs in our absence." His explanation satisfied Minako, and the matter was settled.
Taking off her round blue earring, Ami handed it to Minako. "Just press on it, and the graphic visor will appear. And take my handheld computer. They will both help you find and identify the plant."
"Okay. King Acoupser and I probably won't be back until after dinner, so all you staying in the palace must come up with good excuses to cover up this mess." The transformation stick crested with the symbol of Venus appeared in her right hand. "Venus Crystal Power!" she shouted.
"Is it necessary to shout?" whispered Nephrite to Kunzite. The latter shrugged his shoulders.
Out of thin air, gold ribbons wrapped themselves around her, and in a burst of sparkling stars, her princess gown was replaced with the infamous sailor uniform. Zoisite stopped rubbing the lump on his head to ogle the tight white bodysuit, the cute blue-violet bow on her chest, and the short, pleated orange skirt that exposed her long, slender legs. He wedged himself between her and Kunzite. "You know Venus, we probably started on the wrong foot, but I just want to say--"
Endymion punched him in the face to stop him from saying anything. "This is not the time for that, you idiot," he grumbled as he dragged Zoisite away.
Hasty farewells were made, and Minako and Kunzite embarked on their mission. Conjuring a portal, they walked through it and found themselves in the jungles of Venus on the other side. Minako put a hand to her ear and pressed Ami's earring to activate the graphic visor. The weightless blue laser monitor flashed across her eyes, allowing her to analyze her surroundings. She proceeded to open the matching metallic compact computer and type vigorously.
"Exactly where are we?" asked Kunzite.
"The portal transported us to Euphillida Island, which is located in the middle of the Erosian Sea."
The heat and humidity licked at Kunzite's face, forcing him to loosen his cape and unbutton the collar of his uniform. He might have envied Minako, whose uniform consisted of a short and airy skirt and a sleeveless top, but the thought alone threatened his masculinity. The heat was already getting to him.
Reading his thoughts, Minako elucidated: "We're also on the equator, so this area gets a lot more sun during the summer. Did you know that Venus boasts of the highest temperatures in the solar system? It's because of the thick atmospheric clouds that keep the heat in, but I'm so used to it that I hardly notice. But if it becomes too unbearable for you," and she winked mischievously at him as she spoke, "you can strip down to your underwear. Don't worry - we'll keep it between you, me, and these trees."
"Let's just find that damn plant," he growled.
Minako accessed the Mercurian Archives of Information online and searched for information on the promithicus plant. She read the following description: "Promithicus is a perennial herb of the genus Panax, in the family Araliceae. It is native to the rain forests of Venus, primarily along the Cumulus Belt. Believed to have roots of extraordinary healing properties, promithicus has been uprooted to near extinction. It is estimated that there is one promithicus plant for every 2.5 million acres of forest. During the summer season, it grows blossoms with vibrant purple and orange corolla."
Whenever they came across a flower that matched the physical description, the graphic visor would flash and the mini computer would beep, but upon further analysis, they would discover that they were mistaken. Nevertheless, they were optimistic, and Minako indefatigably continued to scan the area and follow the directions on the screen. Mile after mile, they trekked through the uncomfortable wilderness, the only sounds being the flapping wings of wild birds, the rapid typing on the diminutive keyboard, and the contemplative voice of Minako as she muttered bits of information. Then all of a sudden, the visor and the computer went blank.
"Shit! You've got to be kidding me!"
"What? What's going on?"
"My equipment went dead!"
"Are you sure you didn't accidentally press 'off'?" he asked skeptically.
She glared at him. "Are you calling me a ditz?"
He declined to answer.
Momentarily forgetting his implied insult, Minako frenetically tried to reboot the system, but she never got past the wretched blank screen. "Ami-chan's computers are connected to her supercomputer on Mercury. Something must be blocking the transmission."
"So how are we supposed to find what we're looking for now that are only tools are useless?" inquired Kunzite, fatigued and disgruntled. "I knew I shouldn't have relied on your people's technology."
Minako was irritatingly unruffled. Instead, she pointed triumphantly to her head. "I can always rely on my famous Venusian instincts."
He glowered heavily at her. "I'd rather depend on the broken equipment."
"Oh, stop being a sourpuss. I do remember the last coordinates that the comp gave me before it flat-lined, and if we use the stars as our guide, I'm sure we'll be fine. Before you'll know it, we'll be back on the Moon and Rei-chan will be okay."
"If I had known that we would resort to consulting the stars, I would've rather dragged Nephrite with me instead of you."
"And if I had known that you would be such a whiny bitch, I would've rather taken him, too. Now quit complaining and follow me! We haven't much time!"
Left with no other alternative, he trailed her. They ran for several more miles until they slowed their pace to a walk with the intention of catching their breath. The intolerably warm weather of Venus began to suffocate Kunzite. His mind became a little cloudy, and his tongue, unfortunately, loosened up.
"Why are women so stupid and careless?" he grumbled.
"Excuse me?"
Kunzite quickly checked himself. "Pardon me. Even the hottest places on Earth cannot compete with your planet. I'm not quite myself. What I meant was… Oh, blast. Nevermind."
Being quite exhausted as well, Minako stopped him in his tracks.
"Oh no you don't, mister. You've got Minako Aino curious now, and when Minako Aino gets curious--"
"She refers to herself in the third person? Just forget it, little girl. Don't let your pretty empty head read too much into a meaningless remark."
"If you're trying to distract me with your inane comments, then sorry, you're doing a horrible job. I was going to say, before your unnecessary interruption, that when I get curious, I become indomitably determined to learn what I want to know. So ask your question again before I have to force it out of you." She moved closer to him so that her face was barely three inches from his own, and her eyebrows knitted over her appealing and prying lapis eyes. "I can be very convincing," she purred evilly.
Somewhere in his stoic mind, that small, crude male part of him wondered what naughty things she would do to get precisely what she wanted. The heat had definitely gotten to him. He casually continued their hike. 'Damn hormones,' he cursed. 'I thought those things disappeared by the time I hit two-and-twenty.'
"Since that silly, girlish nature of yours refuses to stop pestering me, I can only surrender to your demand and thus preserve my nerves. I was going to ask you… what drives a woman to obey her instincts, to trust her feelings without a doubt? It's suicide, if you ask me. So why is the female species so negligent of the commodity that we humans like to call logic?"
"If Ami-chan heard you say that, she would have blasted you with a blizzard and turned your reproductive organs into icicles."
"Okay, so there are exceptions to the rule," he admitted, "but I'm speaking in general."
Minako smiled. "Do you know, my dear general, that oftentimes a woman's intuition is more reliable than tangible clues?"
"Rubbish."
"Oh really? Well, take Rei-chan for example. That girl lives on her senses, her feelings, her premonitions, her instincts."
"Lady Rei is another exception."
"How so?"
"She's born with those psychic powers."
"True, but isn't every woman endowed with strong instincts? Granted, the princess of Mars has it to a much greater extent, but all women are born with it, and they're going to use it to their advantage."
"Still, why don't *most* girls use sound reasoning once in a while?"
"I have to answer your question with another question: why don't men think with their mind instead of their groin?"
"That was unfair."
"Aww, does the tin man wish that he too could be affected by physical sensations?"
"Was that supposed to be an insult?"
"Compared to what I really think of you, you might as well take it as a compliment."
"You still haven't quite answered my first question."
She sighed. "I am the Senshi of Love and War. Day in and day out, I cannot help but heed the certain vibes that I perceive. You may scoff all you like, but more than once have my gut feelings saved my life and the people I have vowed to protect. It is truly a shame that so many people, like yourself, are so remotely out of touch with their feelings."
"The brain and the heart are separated for a reason," he pointed out patronizingly.
"Ah yes, but they are housed in the same body, too."
He pondered over her statement for a while, and when he was about to renew the conversation, she slapped him across the face so brutally that he thought his jaw was knocked out of his head.
"DAMN IT, WOMAN, WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"Hehe, sorry! A huge mosquito was about to bite you," she explained, showing him the squashed remains of a nasty insect on her once-clean white glove. She then used her unsoiled hand to wipe off the remnants from his cheek. As she gently rubbed his face, she smiled contentedly at him.
Impulsively, he gazed down at her, temporarily mesmerized by the movement of her hand and the expression in her eyes. "Why are you smiling?" he asked softly.
She glanced at him solicitously. "That was the first time you called me 'woman' instead of 'little girl'."
He was surprised that she would pay attention to such a detail. Apparently, she was, too. "There," she said abruptly, wiping her hands on the moss of a nearby tree. She gave a muffled apology for not knowing her own strength and vaguely suggested continuing their operation. He was more than willing to comply.
Minako barely took three steps before her left leg was sucked into a marshy patch of ground. It caused her to trip, and her arms also got stuck in the greedy, damp mantle. "Step back, Kunzite! It's quicksand!" Now that her hands were trapped, she could not summon her Venus Love Me Chain. She was sinking rapidly, but her body from her shoulders up was still free.
Kunzite reflexively summoned a shimmering plasmatic rope and shot it around the thickest and sturdiest branch of an adjacent tree. Fearlessly, he jumped into the pit of quicksand, grabbed her exposed shoulder with an iron grip, and pulled her out by retracting the rope of energy. When Minako's arms were free, she wound them around his neck, and the rope elevated them to the branch. Kunzite hauled her and himself over the bough, and they rested their backs against the broad tree trunk. "Did I hurt your shoulder?" he asked.
"Is that concern I detect in your voice, or is it a tinge of hope?"
"Be serious."
She tried to raise her arm. "OW! I think you dislocated my shoulder." Kunzite instantly removed his cape to make a sling for her arm.
"I think you're glad that I fell in," mumbled Minako. "It makes you the hero, and you got to mangle my arm."
"I had no other choice!"
"Sure… but really, I'd rather have a banged-up shoulder than die pitifully in a quagmire." She looked meaningfully into his visage. "Thank you… for rescuing me." She smirked. "I guess you're not as useless as I thought you were."
He too cracked a smile. "Don't tempt me to push you back into the quicksand."
"Oh yeah? I'll take you down with me."
"Ungrateful," he sighed, and then his eyes blinked with a realization. "Did you know that you called me by my first name when you warned me to step back?"
"No I didn't!" denied Minako.
"Yes you did! You yelled, 'Step back, Kunzite! It's quicksand!' I didn't believe that we were on such familiar terms," he said in mock disdain.
Her lips curved upwards charmingly. "Well, people have first names, so why not use them?" Kunzite didn't mind at all, and for the first time, they agreed on something on pleasant terms. They were not exactly friends, but they were not enemies anymore either.
Night soon consumed the forest, and Kunzite pulled out a small torch to light their way. Since their last interlude, they had resumed their frenzied sprint, and nothing short of a confrontation with a bloodthirsty beast would slow them down.
BEEP BEEP.
Except for that. The two of them stopped dead in their tracks. Minako pulled out Mercury's compact computer and pushed on the earring. "Alright! System up and running again!" she cheered. The beeping sound got louder and faster. "See? I told you I was leading us the right way. We must be close to it now." She and Kunzite walked slowly, eyes peeled for the promithicus root.
Out of the blue, a long saber was pressed dangerously close to their necks.
"Don't move," ordered a gruff, low voice. Kunzite and Minako exchanged looks, but they did not dare move a muscle. "Now, hands up and slowly turn and face me," commanded the stranger, and they did as they were told.
"Haruka-san?!" cried Minako.
Haruka Tenou, senior officer of the Outer Senshi and princess of Uranus, lowered her sword and smiled crookedly. "Minako-chan? That you? Holy moly, what the devil are you doing in the middle of this jungle?" the tall, elder Senshi asked as she patted Minako's head warmly. Her short, sandy-colored hair swept over her amused and arresting navy eyes, and she crossed her muscular yet elegant arms across her chest. Haruka was certainly an attractive woman, but the way she dressed and behaved made her more handsome than pretty.
"I should ask the same of you," answered Minako, clearly perplexed.
"I'm on vacation. Can't you tell by my getup?" Minako finally observed the baggy button-front shirt patterned with martini glasses and palm trees, the khaki cargo shorts, and the thong sandals. Kunzite thought she was crazy. Minako just laughed.
"Minako-chan, what happened to your arm?"
"It's a long story."
"And if it isn't King Kunzite Acoupser! How have you been, sir?"
"I've been better, but I'm glad to see you again, Princess Tenou."
"Oh, just call me Haruka. So, what are you two kids doing all alone in the middle of nowhere?" she interrogated suggestively. "This is undoubtedly a strange place to have a romantic rendezvous, don't you think? The backseat of a carriage would have been more convenient."
Kunzite and Minako were quick to explain the crisis back on the Moon because, first of all, it was their top priority, and secondly, it distracted Haruka from the rising blushes in their faces. Haruka converted to perfect seriousness and asked to see the tiny beeping computer. "I think what you're looking for might be located at my camp, just a hundred meters ahead," she claimed. She swiftly led the way, and the duo raced after her. Sailor Uranus was a monster when it came to speed, so they reached the campsite a while after her. There, they met up with the other three Outer Senshi.
Michiru Kaiou greeted them affectionately. She was not surprised when they arrived together -- she had seen them in her enchanted mirror. The beautiful water Senshi of Neptune was as cool and graceful as her element, and she was arguably the most refined of the princesses of the Silver Millennium. Her aquamarine hair cascaded down her back like a whimsical waterfall, and her enchanting green blue eyes sparkled like the sea. Unfortunately for the male race, she was the devoted life partner of Haruka, who loved her more than any man ever could.
Princess Setsuna Meiou of Pluto, protector of the Time Gate, stood sedately next to Michiru. Her glossy black hair, which was streaked with an iridescent emerald, swept the backs of the calves, and the light of the campfire complimented her glowing tan skin. Her unfathomable garnet eyes always gave one the impression that she was a wise, old spirit despite her fine, youthful features. She gave Minako a hug and smiled at the king from Earth, but as she performed these gestures, she studied the pair meditatively. Minako caught the significant look, but she knew that Setsuna never shared her knowledge of the past, present, and future, for she had pledged eternal secrecy.
The last of the bunch dozed in her sleeping bag. The young princess of Saturn, Hotaru Tomoe, was the picture of innocence with her mysteriously exquisite heliotrope eyes closed in peaceful slumber and her slim hand resting against her pillow. Her silky, shoulder-length raven locks were a striking contrast to her smooth snow-white skin. It was hard to remember that she was the Senshi of creation and destruction, the mightiest of all the Senshi. With the drop of her legendary glaive, she could obliterate an entire planet, but she preferred to spend her time reading or playing a game of leapfrog.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
The visor finally locked onto a target, and according to its results, the promithicus was supposed to be right where Setsuna stood.
"Well, Setsuna, I guess we're going to have to squeeze those medicinal juices out of you," Haruka chortled.
"I am quite sure that I am not a weed," affirmed Setsuna placidly.
"Off course you're not, otherwise the natives of the island would have already smoked you."
"Haruka!"
"Kidding!"
Michiru rolled her eyes. "Setsuna, I think you are standing on the plant," she suggested helpfully.
Setsuna stepped aside, and indeed there was a trampled purple and orange flower. She quickly yanked the roots from the soil and handed them to Minako to verify the authenticity. "We've got a match!" she cried merrily. Tears of happiness welled in her eyes. "Rei-chan will be alright!" Glad that their journey was not in vain, Kunzite joined in her celebration.
The Outer Senshi cheerily expressed their relief.
The volume of their hurrahs disturbed the peace of the sleeping one. Slowly, Hotaru opened her sleepy, adorable eyes and walked over to Minako. She passed a glowing hand over the injured shoulder, and the joints were magically set back in place. Minako moved it around and discovered that it was completely healed. Next, Hotaru quietly toddled back to her sleeping bag and promptly fell asleep.
"When Hotaru-chan wakes up in the morning, make sure to thank her for me."
To be continued…
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Can you believe it? "The Winnng Losers" has survived a whole year!
Happy Dance
I think I deserve a lot of reviews for my measly accomplishment as a sort of birthday gift. I actually enjoy the critical ones! Read the following review, which I have dotingly called "my favorite":
"I really enjoyed some of the jokes that your characters made. They were quite funny and that's what made me keep reading. What made me want to stop was the way you portrayed your characters. Ami is still portrayed as smart and Rei is still portrayed as fiesty. You do what everyone else does. I'm not saying that you can't describe them as that anymore but don't depend on those characteristics in shaping your characters. If you really want me to believe that a character is a human being, then don't stereotype the person in any way (including associating them with the same color). Also, you describe these characters at a very high level, being kings and princesses, etc, but they don't exhibit that kind of behavior. I know that you want to make these characters more human but would kings and princesses really play prank jokes on each other? The point is that I don't think your characters are realistic as princesses and kings in the setting that you placed them. Now, if this was early 21st century Earth, then these characters would be much more believable. Where you set this story is just as important as what you write about."
And what is my response to this? This person is absolutely, positively, one hundred percent correct! My story, "The Winning Losers," is technically outlandish, unrealistic, and unoriginal. I do often associate the Senshi with their custom colors. I have kings and princesses doing obscene and immature things because frankly I'm not talented or intelligent enough to make this a comedy without doing so. Yes, I do portray Ami as "smart" because Naoko Takeuchi, the ingenious creator of Sailor Moon, intended her to be. I have Rei act the way she does because it ties into my story better, but I have somewhat elaborated more on her character in this chapter. However, I do not think that my Ami is just "smart," nor do I think that my Rei is just "feisty." I believe that I have added a different dimension to each character than some other writers, but in my vanity, I'm probably the only one who thinks so. For my amusement (and for a small handful of people), I've created an entirely new universe where modern thought clashes with ancient custom. It's ridiculous and repulsive, as this astute critique so accurately points out, and I am well aware of that. I plead guilty.
Unfortunately, this good critic sent his or her review fourteen chapters late, and now I am too deep in the story to change its course. I will, though, store these suggestions in my memory in case I decide to write other stories. (More stories after this mind-sucking monstrosity? I don't think so.)
So if you are searching for a good, credible portrayal of the Sailor Senshi, this story is not for you. "The Winning Losers" is a burning eyesore of utter nonsense mixed with preposterous scenarios and glutinous slapstick.
But as disastrous as it is, I have grown an irrational fondness of it, and my hard work this past year is a testament of it. ^_^