The Man Who Knew Too Little
Chapter 11 by Clubs
"Excuse me, what?" Dean, subtle as ever, was staring at Bobby with an expression that suggested he thought Bobby might be a little wrong in the head.
"He's not wearing a meatsuit anymore." Bobby reiterated, rolling his eyes, "He is a meatsuit."
"Are you sure it isn't just that he left his body behind or something? Maybe he went back to Hell." Sam suggested, shooting an apologetic look at Lucifer, who winced slightly at the mention of Hell.
"I think I know that arrogant prick when I hear 'im."
When the brother's still looked skeptical, the archangels sighed and interjected.
"Not that this isn't already blindingly obvious to everyone else here boys, but you do recall that it is God that we are dealing with, right?" Gabriel said, eyebrows raised.
"Turning a demon into a human isn't really that difficult if you're the Creator of All." Lucifer added. Dean rolled his eyes at the sarcastic duo, and turned to watch the unconscious ex-demon. He bit his lip, mulling over their options in his head.
"Well still, I think we should at least put him in the Panic Room or a Devil's Trap or something. I don't like him just...around."
"Trust me, I don't much enjoy the thought either." Bobby said, moving to Crowley's side. "You gonna help me move 'im?" Dean obliged, picking up and supporting the short but heavy man with the older hunter as they carried him none too gently down the stairs. Sam, feeling awkward just standing there watching them, decided to go into the kitchen to survey the damage. Apparently Bobby hadn't gotten around to mopping up the blood on the floor and some of the appliances yet, so he went ahead and grabbed a rag, setting to work on that.
Meanwhile, the two archangels remained in the living room, not looking at each other. There was some leftover tension left hanging in the air like drying laundry, except without that nice clean scent. Gabriel automatically reached for a lollipop to busy himself, before he realized he didn't have any left. Sighing, he felt a ripple of energy beside him, and looked up to see Lucifer holding out a lollipop to him. He smirked as he took it, because smiling just wasn't his badass style.
"So..." Lucifer began, watching the Trickster as he began to lick lazily at the sucker. "How long were you looking for me?" Gabriel paused before answering.
"A few hours." He stated vaguely, although he wasn't sure why he didn't want to admit to searching for his lost brother for 5 hours straight. Lucifer watched him, unable to read the Messenger's face or tone to tell how he felt about it. Finally after a pregnant pause he nodded, looking out the window instead at nothing in particular.
"It felt like years to me." He said quietly, and Gabriel bit his lip. "I was just curious. Time moves slower in Hellfire. Even if it isn't real."
"Luce..." Gabriel wasn't even sure what he wanted to say. He just wanted it gone. Wanted the lump that was somehow simultaneously occupying his stomach and his throat to just go away and wanted Lucifer to be safe. He wanted the Morningstar to not be in constant fear of going back, of being thrown mercilessly back into the cage for all eternity.
When the younger angel didn't continue, Lucifer turned around to face him again. He looked more like a child than he ever had before in his entire existence. His eyes were sad, and the corners of his mouth were turned down, set in a thin-lipped frown. His eyes just looked lost and confused and hopeless. Lucifer was reminded of when they were younger, safe and naïve up in heaven before the trouble, any of it, had started.
It was harder nowadays to recognize Gabriel as the younger sibling, but back then he had played the part exceedingly well. As much sarcasm and spite that he had in him even in his first hundred years, he had always looked at both Lucifer and Michael (or "Luce" and "Mike" as they were called by him) with such respect and admiration. Raphael had been more condescending, trying to act just as old and mature as they were, even more so in fact. Countless times Gabriel had called her out for it, telling her to just loosen up and take the stick out of her ass, but really it was all just in good fun.
If there had ever been such a thing as an innocent Gabriel, that would have been it. Then their dick of a father had gone and ruined their existence, and everything had slowly crumbled after that.
The look in Gabriel's eyes now, that was just a ghost of their past carefree lives, celestial siblings living among the clouds. As much as he had been through, that sight still tore at Lucifer, and he did something very unlike him. In a rare and almost nonexistent show of affection and comfort (that he had nonetheless engaged in several times that day), Lucifer carefully pulled his little brother into a hug. It was awkward for him, he wasn't used to this anymore. He just knew that he didn't want to lose Gabriel again. Even if they ended up losing, or even worse, if they ended up winning and having to kill their brothers, he didn't want to lose Gabriel again.
The Messenger didn't react at first to the strange but not unwelcome embrace. Mostly he was surprised, but then he leaned into it, accepting the small comfort. He knew what Lucifer was trying to say. And he agreed. Whatever the outcome, he didn't want to leave, he didn't want to lose his big brother again either. He slowly, hesitantly, brought his arms up to return the hug. Part of his mind registered how awkward this would be if the Winchesters or Bobby showed up now, but he pushed that aside. They could go fuck themselves. He wanted a moment with his Lucifer.
Somewhere, far off in heaven, God watched, head tilted to the side as he listened to the whispers and voices that came to him on the wind. He smirked, turning to look at his two children, both archangels waiting obediently behind their father, awaiting orders.
"Your brothers' bond has reformed. Can you feel it?" he asked them, and Michael nodded, though he gave no other visible reaction. God's smile widened, his borrowed teeth glinting in the eternal light all around them. "Do you wish to join them? Reform your own bonds?" he asked quietly. The archangels raised their slightly bowed heads.
"No, father." They answered in unison, eyes blank.
"We serve only you." Michael droned.
"We love only you." Raphael added. God nodded, satisfied. He turned back around to face away from them again, looking out upon His domain.
"Very good, my children. You shall be rewarded for your loyalty." He murmured. "Soon we shall descend upon the Earth and begin the Reign anew."
Michael twitched a little at His words, but just as quickly was once again solemn and solid. They both nodded.
"Yes, father."
"What are we going to do with him when he wakes up?" Sam asked no one in particular. The three hunters had eventually returned to Bobby's living room, where the two angels were waiting, Gabriel sitting on a musty old armchair in the corner and Lucifer staring aimlessly out the window, looking bored. Apparently they were so stealthy at feelings that the other three were absolutely none the wiser to their conversation and eventual hug.
Dean shrugged.
"Keep him in there. Even if he is human now, I don't trust him." He said.
"Well yeah, but for how long? Eventually we'll have to let him out." Sam replied, and Dean scoffed, unimpressed by how logical his brother was.
"If he's human he'll be easier to handle." Bobby supplied, "Maybe we could get someone to watch him while we're busy with the Big Guy upstairs."
"Who would be stupid enough to agree to that?" Dean asked skeptically. Bobby snorted.
"I'll give Rufus a call. He's never doin' anything useful." At this response, Dean snorted too, smirking. Then his face turned serious again.
"So what are we going to do about the Big Guy upstairs?" he asked. There was a pause.
"Well, we ain't got any way to tell where he is or what he's up to, and same goes for his two brainwashed little ass-kissers." Bobby said. Gabriel and Lucifer threw half-hearted glares in the older hunter's direction, but he ignored them. "Way I see it, there's nothin' much we can do besides preparing for the whole world to come crashing down."
"Well aren't you just a fountain of charm." Gabriel interjected, another lollipop sticking out of his mouth. Bobby rolled his eyes.
"You got a better idea?" Gabriel raised his hands in mock surrender.
"Hey, I just call it like I see it."
Bobby snorted, turning back to the Winchesters.
"What I don't understand is where all the other angels are. Great big Apocalyptic showdown, you'd think they'd be front and center." He said. Lucifer and Gabriel exchanged a glance.
"God killed them all." Lucifer said, and the three hunters stared at him.
"What? Why?" Sam asked, and Lucifer shrugged.
"Because he's a dick. Because he's insane. Because there was nothing better for him to do, I don't know. I don't think His children were too happy about his sudden appearance in someone who used to be one of their own. He probably didn't want to take the risk of rebellion."
"But can't he brainwash angels or something?" Dean asked. Gabriel rolled his eyes.
"Do you have any idea how many angels there are? It's not like you three have had the misfortune to meet 'em all. It'd be faster and easier to kill them." He said, his tone nonchalant. In truth he hated the thought. Not because he had particularly liked his less powerful siblings (come on, they all had sticks so far up their asses that the other end was coming out their mouths), but just the principle of them being slaughtered so suddenly all at once was terrifying. He was used to the subtle whispers of communication passing through his head all the time, he was used to being able to sense all the other angels in the back of his mind, and now...now it was only three little blips. Lucifer, Michael, and Raphael. And that thought scared him.
What if they lost? Worse, what if they won? If they achieved their objective and killed the power-hungry deity, what would happen to them? They would be alone, just four of them, maybe only two if they had to kill the others. Completely alone in heaven and on Earth. That thought scared him even more.
Not long after the conversation about God and the angels, Sam abandoned the others in favor of going to bed. Dean followed not long after, muttering about getting some decent sleep for once, though it was clear that there was little to no chance of that happening. It was more likely that he was going to lay awake for a while, possibly fighting back tears. Even Gabriel didn't have the heart to taunt him on this matter. It really did look like the man was at his wit's end.
Bobby, who had gotten up and gone to the kitchen to grab a beer, had muttered something indistinct about going to check on Crowley downstairs. The two archangels sat in the living room in silence for a few minutes before Lucifer, who had been leaning against a bookshelf, pushed himself up.
"I'm gonna go see what crap is on TV." He said, sounding bored. Gabriel nodded, standing up from where he had been lounging. He was on his way to the doorway that Lucifer had disappeared through, when he heard a voice behind him.
"Hey boy." He turned his head just because of habit. He obviously knew who that was.
"You know, I am older than you." He pointed out. Bobby ignored him, taking a drink from the half-full bottle in his hand.
"When're you planning on tellin' him?" he asked, jerking his head in the general direction that Lucifer was in. Gabriel turned around in full now, looking confused.
"Tell him what, perchance?" Bobby rolled his eyes.
"That you're in big, gay, love with him." Gabriel's mouth went dry. He feigned nonchalance, refusing to let the hunter see how much that comment had caught him off guard. He snorted, smirking.
"Man, even I'm not that messed up. He's my brother. My brother." Bobby rolled his eyes again, taking a few steps forward.
"Only by technical definition. Sure, God created both of you, but the way I hear it, angels still hook up." Gabriel shrugged, even though he knew that that much was true. He knew at this point that he was just avoiding the issue.
"Either way, I'm not in love with Lucifer. Any sort of feelings I have towards any of my brothers are totally platonic." he insisted, and Bobby smirked.
"I just call it like I see it." He replied, and Gabriel sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He pulled yet another sucker out of his pocket, unwrapping and putting it in his mouth with blinding speed. They both stood in silence, Gabriel trying to think about anything else, and Bobby waiting for him to clear his head. When it became apparent that head-clearing was not going to be happening any time soon, Bobby heaved a sigh, deciding to attack the issue right then and there.
"Look, I hang around Dean enough to know what it looks like." He began, walking closer to look the Trickster in the eye. "Trust me, I know." This was met with silence, so he continued. "All I'm sayin' is that you, unlike him, have what you want right in front of your face. And if there's anything you can learn from lookin' at that poor boy, it's that when you have the opportunity, you should damn well take it. Because Dean didn't. And now it's too late." Still silence. "So stop prancing around like an idjit and go get him."
Gabriel avoided the old hunter's gaze, focusing on the ground.
"Preferably before we both start growin' lady-parts from this conversation." Bobby added. Gabriel looked up, and nodded once, smirking slightly, though his eyes were genuinely grateful, which may have been a first for him.
"Thanks, old man." He said slyly. Bobby didn't even blink.
"Welcome, boy."
A/N: HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT GUYS. SO MUCH LUCIBRIEL. I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE IT. IT'S TOO AMAZING. But seriously, this chapter was really fun to write because of that, and I really am starting to seriously ship these two—which is awkward, because it only makes sense with this exact turn of events. Otherwise it just doesn't work.
Anyway, YAY FOR SASSY BOBBY! You cannot handle the sassiness. You cannot. It is not possible. ANYWAY AGAIN: thank you for your support and patience, next chapter will probably focus more on Crowley and WTF they're gonna do about him.
Jokers: And...umm...about the fact that Rufus is dead and you can't really leave a dude with a dead guy. I guess we just DOUBLE AU'd there, because we totes forgot he was deceased and by the time that we realized it...we had already planned excellent Crowley and Rufus funtimes. So fuck accuracy I guess.