A/N: Revised September 2013. The revisions establish more why St. Clair becomes attracted to Anna and set up the conflict he's starting to feel between her and Ellie.
Deuxième semaine, Paris
The first week back goes as expected. Rashmi teases me mercilessly for my perpetual tardiness, but I'm still getting accustomed to having a fixed schedule again. I'm definitely more of a night owl than an early bird, as they say.
Ellie is arriving in Paris today. I've gone practically mad waiting for her return. It's gotten so bad that I've found my thoughts occupied by someone else – Anna, the new girl.
Anna's slowly becoming a part of our group. (I guess I can thank Meredith and her welcoming bandwagon for that.) And Anna's proximity at breakfast, at lunch, at dinner, at practically every single class I'm in – well, it's making life at SOAP a bit more difficult for me.
I'm sure she hasn't noticed. In fact, I don't think anyone's noticed except Josh. He says it's cool, though. He says thinks about other girls constantly, even though he's with Rashmi.
Well, right, of course. I mean, Anna is an incredibly attractive girl – there's no question of that. I suppose that's part of the reason (okay, maybe a lot of the reason) that I find myself thinking of her so often.
But there's something more, too. Anna's smart, feisty, and doesn't back down from a debate. A lot of girls agree with everything I say – but not her.
I like that.
She's also incredibly, terribly scared about being in Paris. I mean, absolutely petrified. It's not a trait that I like, really, but it's one that makes me feel something a bit, well, more toward her. Like I want to protect her and show her that she's going to survive this year just like the rest of us.
I'd also like to do a few other things I'm sure would make her blush an incredible shade of red, but…Christ. I really do need to stop rambling about her, don't I?
I blast my iPod and get out of bed, changing into my Napoleon shirt, jeans, and boots. The sound muffles most of the idiotic conversation that my neighbors, Dave and Mike, are having about the freshman class – specifically, the girls.
They make my thoughts about Anna seem positively G-rated.
I will myself to think of Ellie, my girlfriend (because that's what she is), and set in motion our reunion plan. The RER is on strike (again) so I run down the stairs and hire a taxi to DeGaulle. We fly through the city and arrive in record time. I give the driver his fare and begin the long journey into the terminal. It's the usual chaotic scene, with people pushing and laughing and bickering all around.
And then Ellie comes into view – and my thoughts of Anna fall completely away.
She's struggling near the baggage claim with her Longchamp suitcases. Her hair cascades around her shoulders, gorgeously disheveled like it always is whenever I've been with her – the way I've missed so much this summer.
Her smooth white tank, black schoolboy shorts, and cowboy-style boots leave little to the imagination. As usual, she's the centre of attention – and back to the centre of mine, too.
My heartbeat quickens as I pull out my mobile.
Napoleon at 6 o'clock, I text.
Her purse vibrates and she opens it to check her mobile. Her exasperation turns to exhilaration as she lays her eyes on me.
"St. Clair!" she screams. I laugh and she runs up to me, dropping her bags. She wraps her arms around me and we kiss with such urgency that my mind practically goes blank.
"Welcome back, Ellen."
"Hmmm," she says, breaking away. "Thanks, babe. You won't believe how crazy that flight was – so many kids screaming!"
"Was it because they thought you were a cowgirl?"
She laughs. "Oh, you know," she says. "Just changing things up a bit. Making that wait worth your while."
My eyes widen at her suggestion. "Oh?" I mischievously ask, picking up her bags. "What d'you have in mind?"
"Things."
"Ah, yes," I say. "Those dreaded things."
She gives me a wicked grin as we run through the terminal toward to the cabs all sweaty and out of breath. Ellie directs our driver to her new address.
"We'll have so much more privacy at my place," she says, sliding in the backseat. "It's going to be great."
I nod and follow her close behind. We sit together, silently, as we pass through the banlieues. I suddenly feel her turn and feel her hands drift down my torso. She rests her head on my chest and fidgets with the button on my trousers.
"I'm so happy to be with you again," she whispers. I glance down, watching her chest rise and fall, and feel her heart pound against my own.
"I'm glad to have you back," I say.
I kiss the top of her forehead and she gazes up, her eyes tell me everything I need to know.
Plusieurs semaines plus tard
Reuniting with Ellie was amazing, awesome, even. But it's been a bit short-lived.
Yes, these days, I'm afraid I'm a bit of a double agent– and I'm not even sure how it happened.
I spend my evenings with Ellie, just like last year, but now we've got some company. Ellie has a bunch of new mates at Parsons and there I am, being dragged along to all their shows and parties.
It's always the same scene. Pretentious blokes everywhere. Young ingénues abound. The most insufferable conversations you can imagine – fueled by booze and pills. And, of course, I can't escape any of it, since they all know who my father is and want in on his gallery.
As if I had any say in his business!
Naturally, I detest all of this, but Ellie adores it. She says it's…invigorating.
The only time I feel like I'm truly with her is when we're back at her place, in the late night, in bed together. She says and does all the right things and I feel for her like I've always felt for her.
Until the next day, of course.
That's when my "normal" life occurs, in the mornings and afternoons, when I have classes and homework and the usual high school routine.
Though I don't like admitting it, I almost prefer this life now. It all seems so easy, so effortless. The classes are still interesting. My mates are still the best. And all the little dramas in our small school are just as ridiculous as they've always been.
There's just one thing, though. Well, a person, really.
Anna.
If I thought it was bad before, well, I clearly didn't know how much worse it was going to get. I find myself flirting with Anna constantly. I've even taken her on a tour of my favorite things in Paris…just because I could.
It feels so blatant that I'm waiting for someone – most likely Rashmi – to just call me out on it.
But no one has. Not yet, anyway.
So I've made a deal with myself. I tell myself I can think about Anna during the day, but as soon as I'm with Ellie, I have to stop.
Sometimes, it works – but I find the more I get to know Anna, the harder it becomes.
I can barely wait until the next time I see her. I'm terrified that, one night, I'll just blurt out "Anna!" when I'm in bed with Ellie.
It goes against everything I've ever believed about relationships – but there it is. The worst possible scenario.
No wonder I can't sleep anymore.