Serena tried to control her breathing but it was useless she was having a panic attack. Blair yelled at Chuck while Nate was whispering something in her ear and trying to hug her but she only felt more suffocated when he touched her.

It wasn't possible. She couldn't imagine ever physically hurting someone much less murdering someone who was once her friend. Yet, even though she couldn't remember the act itself she knew it was true. She couldn't explain how but she just did.

It seemed like forever until she stopped sobbing and her breathing was under control. She looked at Blair and Nate. "Tell me everything."

Nate and Blair looked at each other. Blair gave her a sympathetic look.

"Tell me what I did. And how is it possible that I don't remember?"

Nate didn't even know where to start. "We're not sure. When we got to you, you were panicking and covered in blood, holding your field hockey stick. You said you didn't mean to do it and you were trying to do CPR but her head was bleeding out and we didn't know what to do. You were both high out of your minds…anything could have happened."

"Why didn't you call an ambulance!"

Blair rubbed her back soothingly. "She was already dead. We took care of it because we didn't want anything to happen to you and we covered our tracks as best we could."

Chuck walked back into the room. "We knew you wouldn't be able to live with yourself if you knew what really happened so we helped you forget." He took a small white pill out of his pocket. "It's called a black-out pill. And it lives up to its name; it makes you forget recent events targeting particularly traumatic ones. Leaving you with side-effects that resemble a really bad hangover."

Serena couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Who is G?"

Chuck shrugged. "Someone who has no evidence…no proof. I'm working on narrowing that down."

Nate took the small white pill from Chuck and held it up to Serena. "Take this, babe."

Serena shook her head. "I can't. I don't deserve to forget. I have to turn myself in."

All three of them looked at her like she was insane. Chuck was the first to speak. "That's not going to happen. You turn yourself in and we all go to prison for life. But if you take this pill then this conversation never happened. You can have a future. Go to college, get married…make babies with Nathaniel…you can have it all."

Serena looked at Chuck incredulously. "What about Georgina? What about her future! I killed her! Where's her chance? How can I just carry on like nothing happened?"

Nate asked Blair and Chuck to step out of the room and kneeled in front of a now-sobbing Serena. "Serena, I know you. You have such a big heart…whatever happened that night, no matter what all signs point to; I know you're not a killer. I am begging you to take this. Please baby, just swallow this pill. Can you do that for me? Please?"

…

Serena woke up to her head pounding. She smiled when she saw Nate asleep next to her and curled up against him.

Nate opened one eye and kissed her forehead. "How are you feeling?"

"Like shit. What the hell happened last night?"

Nate shrugged. "We all had a lot to drink. Just hung out here, actually. Got wasted and just kinda knocked out."

Serena tried to look past the fact that he'd just lied to her face. "I'm starving."

Nate nodded and got up instantly. "Smells like waffles. Let's go."

Serena smiled. "I'll be right there."

Nate walked downstairs to find Blair and Chuck at the table.

Nate looked at Chuck. "It worked perfectly."

Chuck nodded. "Good. Oh, I just found out Damien Dalgaard is coming back into town. I'm gonna pay him a little visit."

…

"There you are." Nate leaned over to kiss Serena but she turned her face. Nate frowned. "What's wrong?"

Serena avoided eye contact. "Nothing. I feel sick." She couldn't help but be angry with Nate even though she knew he was just trying to protect her.

Nate nodded. "I could bring you some medicine…or soup. You love tortilla soup."

Serena shook her head and turned to face him. "Do you love me?"

Nate was taken aback by her question. "Of course I do. You know that…right?"

"Then no more lies. Don't lie to me...okay?" She saw the confused look on his face, as if every other word he'd said to her lately hadn't been a lie. "I see you guys whispering when you think I'm not around."

Nate cleared his throat. "We only want to protect you because we care about…"

"I don't need to be protected! I'm not a little girl anymore."

"Okay. No more lies." He gave her a soft smile and placed his hand on her cheek. "I miss you. We haven't had much time alone lately." He ran his hands up and down her sides.

Serena pulled away from him. "I'm tired. I'm going to bed."

Nate looked disappointed. "It's 7 pm." He waited for her response but she was already curled up in bed. "Goodnight." He turned to leave.

"Nate!"

Nate smiled and turned around instantly. "Yeah?"

"Turn off the lights on your way out. And I never took the pill."

…

Nate wasn't sure how to tell them. He was too pissed himself to think about what Serena could do. He was just going to say it. "She didn't take it."

Chuck looked at him. "What?"

"She didn't take the pill. She knows everything."

Blair looked like she was choking.

Chuck let his fist pound on the coffee table so hard that there was an echo. "That was your only job, Nathaniel!"

"I thought she'd done it. What the fuck was I supposed to do? Shove it down her throat like you did?"

"I did what I had to do."

Nate turned to leave. He didn't feel like being yelled at. "Well it is what it is. We'll deal with it."

…