Chapter 2

The next day Maureen was up early. She slept on the couch that night letting Joanne have her alone time with her thoughts, while she was up most of the night with her own thoughts running through her mind, ones that hardly let her get any sleep, and it showed.

Her head snapped up when the bedroom door creaked open and Joanne emerged from inside. The sight of her solemn face didn't give her very good hopes for what was to come next.

"Morning." Maureen stood up, anxious to see how Joanne was feeling today.

Joanne looked over at her, "Good you're up...we need to talk." She softly said and Maureen slowly sank back down onto the couch, those words were never good. She walked over to Maureen sitting down next to her, but a space where their usually wasn't, was now in between them. "I'm not going to beat around the bush... I... want a break."

Maureen's face completely fell, "A break?"

Joanne nodded, "A break. I've just been thinking a lot...and really Maureen, what are we doing? We're so opposite from each other..."

"But opposites attract!" Maureen said moving a little closer to Joanne, reaching for her hands. "Joanne I don't understand where this is coming from all of a sudden. I hardly flirt anymore...my eyes are almost always focused on you."

"Just stop, Maureen." Joanne said, "It's not you..."

Maureen rolled her eyes, cutting in, "Oh how cliché...you're actually going to play that card. It's not you it's me?"

"I'm just...not feeling it right now." Joanne softly said feeling terrible, but her words were true.

"Is there someone else?" Maureen asked tears stinging her eyes, but she wasn't about to let them go just yet.

Joanne simply shrugged not wanting to give an answer.

"Joanne." Maureen said sternly. "I love you. I'm in love with you and I know you love me. You can't just break up with me and not give me a legit reason!"

Joanne sighed casting her eyes elsewhere, anywhere but the hurt expression on Maureen's face. She put up with Maureen, fought so hard for her, even got her to change a little and now she was letting her go so easily, it didn't make sense, but at the same time it felt right.

"There may be someone..." Joanne trailed.

"Fiona?" Maureen whispered.

Joanne sighed finally meeting Maureen's eyes, "Can we not do this? I just... I don't want to be with anyone else, I just need a break... to figure things out."

"You just told me that there may be someone else and now you're saying there isn't." Maureen said, "Don't fuck with me, Joanne! Just say what you have to fucking say!"

"Okay I like Fiona!" Joanne finally admitted. "We have things in common...things you and I don't... perhaps more. It just made me see a different life...it made me question ours, together."

"That's bullshit, Joanne!" Maureen said shooting up. "What? Just because she's a lawyer? Is that what it is? I... I... I'd fucking do anything for you!"

"Maureen..." Joanne sighed slowly standing as well, "I'm sorry. I ... I can't help how I feel. I love you, but...I think I'm falling out of love..."

"But you can't! You can't!" Maureen yelled, "I love you, Joanne!"

"I know you do." Joanne sighed again putting her face in her hands, "I'm sorry. This is just...not what I want right now."

"Well what the fuck!" Maureen said the tears finally being released and pouring down her face, "I don't understand...this doesn't make any sense to me."

Joanne nodded letting out a breath, "I know...I'm sorry. Please don't hate me."

"How can I not hate you when you're breaking up with me for bullshit reasons?" Maureen said storming passed the lawyer to grab her coat.

"Maureen, where are you going?" Joanne asked watching her with worry, she may not have been in love with her anymore, but she still loved and cared for her.

"Why do you fucking care?" Maureen asked pulling her coat on and slamming the door shut.

Joanne's eyes stayed glued to the door, until she finally sank to the couch, "You could have handled that a lot better..." She scolded herself, guilt wrapping around her and tears leaking from her eyes.

Not too long after Maureen was pounding on Collins' door, her fist knocking until her best friend opened up. Collins didn't even have time to greet her with his adorable grin, before Maureen's arms were tightly wrapped arm him, eyes hiding in his chest, and sobs shaking through her body.

"Mo?" Collins softly questioned, wrapping his arms securely around her.

"I hate her." Maureen mumbled. "I hate her, I hate her, I hate her."

"You don't mean that." Collins said running his hand up and down her back. "Why don't you come in and tell me what happened?"

Maureen stood there for a moment, before pulling away and nodding. She swiped at a few tears as she followed Collins into his and Angel's very small, but comfortable apartment.

"Hey, hun." Angel brightly greeted as she walked out of the bedroom, dressed in drag and ready for the day, failing to see the tearstained face, "It's kind of early for you, isn't it?"

Collins made eye contact with his girlfriend, slightly giving his head a shake. Angel rose a confused brow, her eyes going from him and then to Maureen. Maureen gave her a half wave and then stood behind Collins, hiding her distressed features. She hated when people saw her cry. She was supposed to be tough, not weepy and vulnerable.

"I should...?" Angel began wanting to help Maureen with whatever she was going through, but when she looked to Collins, she knew this was her cue to leave. "Go."

Collins nodded, walking over pressing a quick kiss to Angel's lips, watching her go. Once she was gone he grabbed two beers and sat on the couch, handing one to Maureen as she took a seat next to him. Maureen laid her head on his shoulder, his arm wrapping around her shoulders and pulling her close.

"Tell me everything." Collins softly said. "Start to finish. I'm here to listen."

It took Maureen a few minutes, but she soon began her story and by the end of it a fresh new wave of tears ran down her face. Collins, as Maureen's best friend and the cause of Maureen's suffering, automatically felt some rage towards Joanne, but at the same time he knew Joanne to be genuine and couldn't help but look at this situation through her eyes as well.

"Feelings...are a funny thing." Collins said, "Mysterious."

"Fucked up." Maureen said, taking a sip of her beer, "It doesn't make sense. I love her, Collins. I love Joanne, so she has to love me back."

"And she probably does, but she is clearly confused." Collins said.

"She's going to end up with that Fiona chick, I just know it." Maureen said her voice catching in her throat, the thought of Joanne with anyone else made her heart sink into her stomach, it actually made her feel sick to her stomach and glad she skipped out on breakfast this morning.

"You don't know that." Collins said.

"But she can't." Maureen shook her head, "Because I love her, so she has to love me back. She just has too. It's not fair to give me these feelings for someone and then they go and fuck things up."

Collins nodded. Maureen's logic made sense, but at the same time he knew how cruel and fucked up the world could really be and wondered if he should give her some tough loving, or if it were too soon. Because he remembered a time when Mark was in love with Maureen, but Maureen didn't love him the same way.

"It just does not make any sense. What did I do wrong?" Maureen asked, "I don't understand." She said running everything through her head to try and see where she went wrong. "It's not fair. We were doing so well her and I. Was I too clingy?" she asked and then began listing off a bunch of things that might have pushed Joanne away, her big brown, helpless eyes locking with Collins. "I don't understand, Collins."

Collins let out a breath, not sure what to say, all he knew was he hated seeing Maureen like this. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a hug, "We'll figure it out, Maureen."

"I'll get her back." Maureen nodded, although her voice didn't sound too confident. "I love her, so she has to love me back." She stated, almost trying to convince herself this was true.