The One That Got Away Chapter 20: Not Over You, a vampire academy fanfic

This is the chapter that you have been waiting for :D lol I dragged it out didn't I? ^.^ Anyways, just wanted to say thank you for your reviews and that, sadly, this upcoming chapters I will be wrapping this story out... Yay! Anyways, again, can you check out my other, new story? It's called The Sun and the Moon. It's different, I promise. Review and make me one happy girl (:

"Not Over You"- Gavin Degraw

Dreams, that's where I have to go
To see your beautiful face anymore
I stare at a picture of you and listen to the radio
Hope, hope there's a conversation
We both admit we had it good
But until then it's alienation, I know
That much is understood
And I realize

If you ask me how I'm doing
I would say I'm doing just fine
I would lie and say that you're not on my mind
But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two
And finally I'm forced to face the truth,
No matter what I say I'm not over you, not over you

Damn, damn girl, you do it well
And I thought you were innocent
Took this heart and put it through hell
But still you're magnificent
I, I'm a boomerang, doesn't matter how you throw me
I turn around and I'm back in the game
Even better than the old me
But I'm not even close without you

And if I had the chance to renew
You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do
I could get back on the right track
But only if you'd be convinced
So until then...

DPOV

After our little meeting, we all went back home, and we started packing. I was done the same day, but Tasha and Lissa took longer. The guys and I rented a van, and we packed it with snacks, and drinks. We put them in the middle, so they would be more accessible. Once the girls were done with their few bags, we put them in the very back.

We left on a Friday, so we could be there early Saturday.

We all felt excited, even Christian, though he wouldn't admit it.

It was dark at night, I was driving, and I thought everyone else was asleep. From the seat behind me, Lissa spoke up. At first I thought she was bumbling.

"Why did you believe Avery? Why are you even with her?"

I waited a few minutes to answer. Not really knowing how to answer this. To say it was complicated was an understatement. It's been complicated for the past few years, since we began college.

"When I first met her, we had sex, but then her and Ambrose became involved, and I found myself dating Tasha. I learned to care for Tasha in a whole new level. But, after a a year things changed, Avery came onto me again. She said Ambrose was cheating on her. Of course, I didn't believe her. Not until she showed me the pictures of Ambrose with an old high school friend, holding hands. it angered me, and out of anger I slept with her. Everything was a lie. It still is."

I looked at her from the rear-view mirror. That wasn't the actual answer she was looking for. I sighed.

"She got pregnant."

Lissa gasped, "When?"

"Two months after Rose."

"You slept with Avery two months after you broke up with her. Great."

"Look, I'm not the best man out there, but I was angry at myself. I was angry at Avery. I was angry at Ambrose... And angry at Ivan."

"What happened?"

"I'm still somewhat honorable, you know, so I told her I'd be with her, but only because of the baby. She had a miscarriage, when she found out who Rose was."

Lissa leaned back on her seat, and looked at me through the rear view mirror. Her green eyes sparkled in the night. She pursed her lips, and looked out the window.

I knew that the only reason she kept me around was because of Tasha.

"I like you Dimitri. You've shown your a good man, despite it all. But, it's not me who needs convincing."

"I know," I said quietly.

She leaned her head against the window, and closed her eyes. "Goodnight Dimitri."

"'Night Lissa."

I really had some making up to do. But first I had to find Rose.

Once we'd arrived, we got hotel rooms. As we sat in the lobby, a blonde, young woman, arrived with two babies at hand, and an old man.I, personally had a fascination with babies. We slept for a while before we got up again.

We took a shower, got ready, and ate breakfast before we headed out to the cemetery. It was kinda chilly, and windy, when we arrived.

The cemetery was only 20 minutes away, and we got there pretty quickly. Silently, we walked to Ivan's and Mason's grave site, they were put next to each other.

We all came to an abrupt stop, 9 feet away from the graves. There was three adults, and two babies. It was the people from the lobby last night, except there was an extra person.

She was facing Mason's grave, her hair whipping back, and there were fresh tears on her rosy cheeks. She had very long hair, so dark it looked black, but I knew otherwise. I'd felt that hair in my hands, I'd run my hands through it.

My hand went to the key chain in my chest, that went all the way back to my shoulder blade.

I saw her body stiffen.

"Roza..."

RPOV

The room felt oddly cold, and I hugged Ivan close to my body. I looked around, glad I wasn't the only one here. But I was the only one with a baby. A man stood behind me, to keep me safe. It was very loud, filled with screams of joy, and tears.

"I didn't expect to see you here."

I jumped at the voice, and turned to look in front of me. He was dressed in all orange, he had hair stub in his face. He hadn't shaved in a few days. His amber eyes looked at me expectantly, then down at Ivan. I saw the amazement in them, and the pride. I swallowed and took one deep breath.

"Me either, but I need to make peace."

He looked up at me again, his eyes glazed with unshed tears. He bowed down, and his body started shaking with sobs. I wanted toreach over, but I was too afraid.

"I'm so sorry rose, truly am. You have no idea what it's like in here. I'm paying for all my mistakes in more than one way. I hope you can forgive me. The same for Dimitri, Tasha, and Viktoria. Along with the two that I- that I killed."

I felt bad for him, I can only imagine what they'd done to him once they found out he'd raped three girls, and killed two men. I wiped away the tears that had fallen.

"This is my son-your son. Ivan Mason."

He reached out, afraid I would't give him the chance to carry his own son. But I did. He took him in, and spent a few minutes playing with him. I smiled, and I laughed along with him.

"How are you and Dimitri?" he asked, not looking at me. I sighed.

"We're not together. Never will be." This time he did look at me, a confused look on his face.

"And why not?"

"Because I'm over him."

He laughed. He pushed Ivan closer to him, and laughed his ass off. I rolled my eyes.

"What's so funny?" I asked frustrated.

"That I know you. And I know you're lying. You may be able to lie to yourself, but not to me."

I didn't say anything for a while. "You're no one to tell me that Ambrose." He looked at me sadly, and nodded his head.

"I know. I'm sorry."

I looked down at my watch.

"This went smoother than I thought. Look, I just wanted you to meet Ivan, and know I'll send you pictures of him, and bring him when I can, but I really don't my son to see you here."

"Me neither."

"And... To forgive you. It's harder than I thought, but you gave me the biggest gift of them all. But you also took away from me. I decided it's healthier for me and Ivan if I forgave you. From the bottom of my heart, Ambrose I forgive you."

I let out a breath, tears escaping out from my eyes. Oh god, it hurt so bad. More than I ever thought possible. He put his hand over mine, his was cold, and at first I felt disgust and fear, but then I understood. Ambrose was a very misunderstood man. In his own mind, he felt he was doing the right thing, to avenge what he had lost.

"I'm sorry. I wish I could take it away."

But he couldn't, so instead he gave me Ivan back. "I'm also sorry I left with more to remember me from."

I shook my head. "Thank you."

"Thank you Rose. You're amazing, for forgiving me like this, when I don't deserve it. When I don't deserve any of this."

I chuckled, "Probably not, but we all deserve forgiveness."

He nodded, "Like Dimitri does."

I didn't say anything, when the man behind me said it was time to go.

"I don't know when I'll come back, but at least we have peace now. I loved you Ambrose, I did, but well, things happen. I can forgive, but I will not forget."

He reached out to me, but I took a few steps back. He let his hand drop. And I could see the sadness in his eyes.

"Tell him, how much I love him, and how much I loved you. Tell him I regret everything..."

"Okay," I said softly. I turned around and walked out.

"I hope you grow up in a better world than me Ivan."

I didn't get an answer from him, all I got was a smile, and saliva on my shirt. I sighed.

"That's all I'm going to get, aren't I? Oh well."

He hit me in the face, making me laugh.

"I love you too."

We had to rent a van on Thursday morning. We'd already packed Wednesday, and we were ready to go. We'd bought snacks, and drinks for the long drive, and we'd agreed I'd drive first, then Jake, and lastly Mia. Jake went on the back to watch over the kids.

We left Thursday afternoon, so we could get there by Saturday morning.

The drive was long, but we made the best of it, laughing, and making jokes. When we arrived, we checked in into a hotel. I had to use the bathroom, so I left them in the lobby. Once I was done, we went to take a quick nap.

When we woke up, we got ready, and we left for the cemetery that was 20 minutes away from the hotel.

We walked up to their graves. Mason and Ivan had been put next to each other, and I felt something heavy in my heart.

Jake and Mia stood 4 feet behind me with the kids. They gave me enough space to talk to them quietly.

"Hey..." I started.

I pursed my lips together, and I felt cold tears on my cheeks. "I'm sorry I couldn't make it before, but I was busy with Ambrose. He was the one who raped me, and set the house on fire. I'm sorry."

The tears fell freely, and soon I felt myself sobbing quietly.

"Oh God, I miss you. And I love you guys so much. I named my son after you guys, it only seemed fair."

I felt a few pair of eyes on me. And the wind carried to me a very strong, smell. It was a smell I'd often woken up to. I stiffened, and looked at my lap. It couldn't be...

"Roza..."

The wind carried to me his voice. Slowly, I looked up. I felt numb, as I looked at him. He hadn't changed... And I felt longing. So much longing. And need. And I knew Ambrose was right. I wasn't over him. Not by a long shot.

I knew I'd have to see him one day, and I thought that if they asked me, I was over him. I'd forced it into my brain that I was over him, but I was lying to myself all long.

How could I ever be over the man that had taught me to love? The man who'd been my strength. The man that was my soul mate. Right, I couldn't.

And the truth felt like a punch to the gut.

And finally I'm forced to face the truth,
No matter what I say I'm not over you