i like the way you define happiness
you can't be satisfied unless you're bleeding
i'm here to undermine your power trip
it seems like years
since you've been thinking clearly
i am fearless
now you've got no one to push around

I'm fearless
you can never take me down again

dSz

No letters. None. No owls. Not a one.

I pace back and forth, crumpling parchment in my hands. There are letters but they say nothing, they are nothing.

Do they plan to keep me in the dark forever?

They don't know what I know. They haven't seen what I've seen. They don't understand and they never will.

Voldemort is a threat to me, but not my biggest fear. Death is frightful but also tempting. Authority is a nuisance. My family a disease but one that will soon be cut from me.

That leaves only loneliness. The dark, the unknown, these are the things I fear the most.

Is it the monster under the bed that scares the children? Or is it the darkness in which hides the monster just out of sight? Perhaps you see a shadow or a reflection but never the clawed hand or the sharp teeth.

In me I do not see a monster but I sense something lying in wait just beyond the darkness. Its hands are not clawed but small human hands, exactly like mine. No red eyes stare back at me, only green.

February 4, 2019 3:40 PM, Saturday

"So what to do now?" he asked, tapping his chin contemplatively.

"I…don't…know," I responded truthfully. "I thought I'd just wake up but as you can see." I spread my arms wide.

"You're still here," my father stated matter-of-factly.

I shook my head and pointed at him. "No, you're still here. I'm the one who exists, remember?"

He scratched his head. "I suppose you're right."

"So now what?"

"Make the most of it I suppose," he shrugged.

February 4, 2019 4:30 PM, Saturday

The sun shone high in the sky as I watched my father play with his big black dog. In the real world it was named Sirius but here in my head Sirius never existed so instead the dog's name is Shadow. A creaking noise coming from behind me caused me to start and I almost fell off my lawn chair.

"Is this seat taken?" My mother asked as she pointed to the chair next to mine. I shook my head and watched apprehensively as she gracefully sat down. "You understand why I can't believe you, don't you? What you're saying is so farfetched."

"I understand," I interrupted quickly. "It doesn't matter."

Our eyes met and she offered me a warm smile. My heart slipped up into my throat and for a moment I found it difficult to swallow. A slight breeze blew through her hair and I gazed at her, completely mesmerized, as she pushed it behind her ears.

"In the real…" I began but stopped myself. I shook my head and thought out what I wanted to say before starting again. "In my dream I didn't know you and now I don't remember anything about you. Can you tell me?"

She looked at me questioningly. "Tell you what?"

"I don't know," I shrugged, "anything and everything. How about how you and Dad met?"

"Ah, that's a good story," she stated with a nod, "My father, your grandfather, was out driving one day. This was when we still resided in London and your father and I were only teenagers. Father hit Harry and nearly killed him but he couldn't bring Harry to the hospital because the accident happened out in the middle of nowhere. I couldn't even tell you now where exactly it was that it took place but father wrapped him up in his traveling cloak and brought him straight to our home. My mother and I tended to him and after three days he was up and walking again."

Oriel gazed at my father with a wistful look in her eyes. "It was like a miracle. He healed so fast. I still remember when he first opened his eyes and looked at me. He asked, 'Am I dead?' And I said, 'Of course not, why would you say that?' and he answered back, 'Because I'm looking at an angel.'

I snorted loudly. "I hope you didn't fall for that."

My mother gave me an incredulous look. "Of course not," she replied amusedly, "I told him that it was the worst pickup line I'd ever heard."

The sound of our laughter carried across the lawn. It rose into the sky and touched the clouds. It fell to the ground and covered everything in sight. This was the world I had always wished for. A world filled with laughter.

February 4, 2019 6:30PM

A thick fog rolled in as the sun began to set in the West. On the porch I stood waiting for my grandfather, mother on one side of me and my father on the other. The fog continued to thicken until I could barely make out the edge of the lawn. A twig snapped and then there was silence.

"I can't see a thing," I complained aloud as I reached for my father's hand. Instead of warm skin I grasped only cold, damp air. "What…?" Looking to my right I found only fog and to my left was the same. How I wished that I could have at least said good-bye to the two of them.

"Have you made a choice?" Voldemort's voice questioned softly.

I squinted my eyes, attempting to make out anything in the darkness surrounding me. "Where are you?"

"Have you made a choice?" he asked once more.

"I know who you are," I replied slyly.

"Do you?"

"Enkidu," I stated. "You're one of his descendents and my father and I are…"

"Gilgamesh," Voldemort supplied as he stepped out of the fog to stand in front of me. His face was still that of Charles Smith but his eyes were deep red and his hair had turned black as coal. A simple black robe was draped over his thin form with one hand up the opposite arm's sleeve, almost as if he still had a wand hidden there.

"You knew?" I questioned in surprise.

The Dark Lord let out a low chuckle. "Of course," he hissed, "I've always known. It's all up here." He pointed to his head. "But you're not one hundred percent correct in your assumption. I am not one of Enkidu's descendents, I am his ONLY descendent." His voice became louder as he continued.

"I am Enkidu!" he shouted, "The soul of my ancestors reside in me and they will always reside there." A wild expression formed on his face. "Can you imagine having thousands of voices in your head? Thousands of voices that despise you, love you, worship you, hate you? Can you imagine it?"

"No, I…"

"Of course you can't," he interrupted, "When I had my magic I could keep them quiet, I could make them go away but now…now their insults, demands and petty whining never cease. I cannot sleep. I cannot eat. I cannot do anything except continue on with my plans."

"But why destroy the world?" I asked in a confused tone, "Then you'll die too."

One corner of his mouth twitched as if he were about to grin. "There are worse things in life then death, I understand that now. Now tell me what choice will you make. Stay in this wonderful world where all your dreams will come true or return to the world you left where you'll most likely end up dead or ripped to pieces by your own magic."

I shook my head. "I can't stay here. This place isn't real and I can't just abandon everyone."

In seconds Voldemort's eyes were only inches from my own. Two red slits giving me the coldest glare I've ever received. "Tell me where the crystal bottle is hidden. Tell me where your father's notes are hidden. Tell me these things and I promise to make your death quick and painless."

"I don't know," I replied fearfully. I closed my eyes as tightly as possible, knowing that he was doing his best to try and break into my mind. "I don't know!"

"I can't live like this Jenny," he stated as he grabbed both of my shoulders, "And if I can't live then the world can't live."

"But…but what if things were different," I broke in without thinking. "What if you got your magic back?"

The pressure on my shoulders slowly disappeared and the world went silent. "Explain."

I opened my eyes but kept my gaze trained on the ground in front of my feet. "What if there's a way to get your magic back? If my Dad did some kind of spell to take it away then there has to be a way to reverse it. If you had your magic back then you wouldn't need to destroy the world." Voldemort's eyes widened in surprise. Obviously he had never thought there might be a way to get his magic back.

Suddenly the fog began to disappear along with the Dark Lord. "It's a deal my dear granddaughter. Find a way to return my magic and I will let the world continue to exist. I give you one month and then I am done playing games."

"Jenny!" a voice called out through the darkness. "Jenny, wake up!"

I recognized it as Draco's voice but I couldn't tell where it was coming from. "Draco!" I shouted, "Where are you?" I began to run through the darkness until a blast of cold air suddenly hit me full force and I seemed to open a second set of eyes I didn't even know I had.

"Jenny?" Draco questioned as he stared down at me.

Looking around the room I could tell that some time must have passed. I was back in our bedroom with a whole gaggle of vampires standing around my bed. I turned my head weakly, seeking a certain face in the crowd.

"Khalida…" I whispered, reaching a hand toward the sad looking woman. "I know….I know…."

She quickly rushed to my side. "What do you know?" she asked softly into my ear.

"Gilgamesh…" I responded. "Voldemort…"

"You saw Voldemort?" Draco questioned nervously at the sound of the name.

"In here," I replied, pointing to my head.

Khalida scanned my body nervously. "Did he do something to you?"

I shook my head and offered them a small grin. "We made a deal."

"A deal?" they both asked at the same time.

"A deal with the devil," I answered quietly.

Draco gave me a confused look. "What does that mean?"

"It means we need help," I replied, "We need to go back to Hogwarts."

"What!" they both exclaimed.

"Are you crazy?" Draco asked frantically, "We can't…what…are you…"

I nodded my head. "Yes, I'm crazy, but this is something I have to do."

"But why do you have to go back to Hogwarts?" Khalida questioned in a concerned tone. "Are you going to ask for Dumbledore's help?"

"Nope."

"Well Severus can't help us anymore then…"

"I wasn't going to ask Severus," I stated, interrupting Draco in mid-rant.

He cocked his head to the side and gave me a confused look. "Then who?"

"My father," I responded in a serious tone as I pushed myself into a sitting position. "And Charles is coming with us. I need to find out everything about the spell that took his magic."

A look of comprehension crossed Khalida's face right away. It took a few more seconds for Draco to understand why I was suddenly so interested in how Charles lost his magic. "You've got to be kidding me," he sputtered. "You can't be thinking what I think you're thinking."

"I think I am," I replied as a sick feeling took root in my stomach.