Disclaimer: I don't own Fringe.
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Olivia took a cab from the Bishop's residence to a close by mall. She headed straight to the nearest shop selling clothes and bought herself a new outfit, starting with underwear, and basic make up items. She changed her clothes in the toilet, carefully bagging everything from the alternate universe for the FBI technicians who would no doubt want to analyse each item. Next she used the make up to cover the dark circles around her eyes that spoke so clearly of a sleepless night. She also got herself some blond hair dye, but she knew that dealing with her hair would have to wait until later.
On her way out, she stopped at a coffee shop to buy herself the biggest coffee the place sold. While she savoured the taste with great appreciation, the caffeine in her empty stomach made her feel nauseous. Her head was already pounding from no sleep and hours of crying and she had to grit her teeth to avoid throwing up. Taking slow breaths through her nose, she discarded most of her coffee in the nearest bin and walked out to get some fresh air.
She had felt completely numb since getting out of Peter's bed earlier in the morning and she continued to be strangely numb as another cab left her outside the Federal Building in the centre of Boston. She walked in slowly, still relying heavily on her cane, but stopped when she got as far as the security. When she realised that she would need to be escorted in as she no longer had her security pass, her courage almost faltered and she came very close to running, or hobbling, out. A couple of deep breaths helped to bring back the numbness and she approached the nearest security guard before she lost her nerve again.
"Agent Dunham here to see agent Broyles," she said quickly, "he's expecting me."
The guard recognised her and frowned in confusion, but turned to talk to his radio and verify that she was being expected. A few minutes later and Broyles himself came to find her.
"Good to have you back, agent Dunham." His voice betrayed a little emotion, but his eyes were warm and kind as they took in her brand new clothes, cane and tired expression.
"Good to be back, Sir." She nodded and smiled.
"This way," Broyles nodded her through security and led her towards one of the bigger conference rooms, "now there will be quite a few people at your de-brief. I have already brought them up to speed about what the Fringe division does and also what you are personally capable of. So hopefully you can get straight to the point."
"Thank you, Sir." She followed him into a room, where ten officials with stacks of note paper and dictaphones were already gathered. She sat down, accepted a glass of water Broyles offered her and began her story.
At the end of the first day, she had got as far as explaining how Walternate had transplanted the other Olivia's memories into her brain in order to make her think that she belonged in the other reality. Her voice was hoarse from hours of talking and the feeling of numbness persisted. Once she was dismissed by the panel, with an order to be back the following morning, she followed Broyles who had beckoned her to go with him. He led her to his office, where a box was waiting on his desk.
"This is for you," Broyles indicated towards the box.
She stepped forward and eased off the lid. Inside she found a standard issue gun, her badge, access card, re-issued driving licence and passport, together with new credit cards, a new phone and some cash. She pulled the items out, feeling immediately better once she had strapped on the holster and the familiar weight of her gun was pressing against her side. Her laser pistol from the other universe, together with all her clothes and other possessions had indeed been handed to the scientists for studying.
"I can get a car to take you home now, if you wish?" Broyles offered, watching the nigh imperceptible relaxing in her shoulders as she was a fully equipped agent once more. At his words, she stiffened.
"Actually, I'm not sure I'm ready to go back to my apartment yet," she said, looking at her feet, "I mean, she lived in my home for months." Olivia shifted her weight to ease the pressure on her injured leg.
"Let me book you into the hotel next door, then." Sympathy coloured Broyles' voice as he spoke.
"Thank you", she glanced up at her boss and for a moment he saw the unguarded hurt in her eyes. Then she blinked and an unreadable mask was back covering her face. He sighed, his heart heavy for her, and briskly made a hotel reservation for her. She gave him a wan smile in thanks and limbed out.
The hotel she was booked in seemed far too luxurious, in so far as Olivia noticed her surroundings. Once in her room, she headed straight for the bathroom, pulling out the bottle of hair dye. Only when the last traces of red had been bleached out of her hair did she allow herself to rest a little. She ordered a dinner from the room service and picked at the food listlessly while surfing through the wide range of channels available. She was only half way through the meal when she could stomach no more and pushed the dishes away. Feeling too tired to watch any more TV, she brushed her teeth and went to bed.
Out of habit she had pushed her gun under the pillow before switching off the lights and when her nightmares woke her up in the middle of the night, she found herself clinging on to her weapon. She managed to swallow the scream threatening to break free as she struggled to calm her breathing. The cold, hard angles of the gun were her only comfort as she rolled onto her side and began to sob.
In the end her de-brief lasted for three exhausting days. For countless hours she recounted her experiences in a dispassionate and detached voice. She spoke of what had happened to her, of the people she had met and of the world in general. She explained in as much detail as she could about the problems the other world was facing, without voicing her speculations as to their original cause. Although she discussed her increased abilities to cross between words and create small fireballs, she kept her ability to create windows to the other reality a secret. She had no wish to become a tool to be used by the government to spy on the other universe. Only Peter knew of her new ability and whatever else she might have thought of him, she knew she could trust him.
When she was not being grilled by the de-brief panel she spent her time in her hotel room, ostensibly watching TV but really just staring into space. Every so often she would pick her up new phone, stare at it for a while and then put it down. Someone, probably Astrid, had saved contacts to the phone, so that she had the numbers for Peter, the lab, Astrid, Rachel, Broyles, the Federal Building and even her favourite Chinese take-away place. Astrid need not have done that of course, since Olivia had memorised everyone's phone numbers a long time a go. The new phone was gathering up a long list of missed calls, most of them from Peter. She had kept the phone on silent during the de-briefing, but even when it was on and she heard it ring, she simply ignored it, not wanting to talk to anyone.
Every night the nightmares woke her in cold sweat and every night the tears came. As sobs racked her body, she clung to her gun as if the cold metal was the only thing keeping her sane. During the quiet hours of night when she was too exhausted to keep crying, she knew that she could not go on like this for much longer. A plan was beginning to form in her mind and the more she thought of it, the more felt compelled to put it in action.
The morning after her de-brief was concluded, Olivia knocked on Broyles' door and for once waited for an acknowledgement before walking in. Broyles looked up from his paperwork in surprise at her as she came closer and sat down.
"What can I do for you, agent Dunham?"
"I was thinking," she said, smiling slightly, "that I'm about two years over due a holiday. So if it is okay with you, I was hoping to take couple of weeks off to get my bearings after everything?"
"Of course," Broyles looked very surprised at her request, "take as much time as you like."
"Two weeks should do it." She nodded, still smiling a little.
"Anything particular you were planning to do?" Broyles asked, his curiosity piqued.
"Not really," she shrugged, "I just want to get out of town for while."
"In that case, have a good time." He nodded as she stood up to leave. She paused at the door, her hand resting on the door handle.
"Oh Sir," she turned back, "thank you." He thought he saw a small spark of life returning to her haunted eyes, and her expression stayed in his mind long after she was gone.
Olivia took a deep breath as she walked out into the morning sunshine and shivered despite the warm weather. For the next phase of her plan, she would have to return to her apartment.