Chapter 18

"Hi, Muscles, how are you feeling?" Vala greeted Teal'c at his quarters.

"Much improved, Vala Mal Doran, thank you."

"I'm glad to hear it," she smiled, "we aliens need to stick together."

Teal'c merely smiled and bowed his head.

"Well then, the other reason I'm here is to see if you have anything you want to add to my laundry basket. I don't quite have a full load."

"My clothes are in need of a washing. I will accompany you."

Vala's smile lit up the corridor. "Even better!"

They walked together toward the base's laundry facility, both wearing standard SGC uniform pants, black T-shirts, and combat boots.

"I take it my cast-offs are still agreeable to you."

"More than agreeable, Teal'c, thank you. They're nice and worn, so the material is much softer than the newer uniforms I'd been given way back when. And even though Carolyn and Samantha took me out shopping, all the maternity clothes look so…maternal, you know? Pastel colors and flowers and rainbows." Vala squinted her face thinking about it. "I don't know, it's just not quite me."

When they arrived, Vala shook out a few of her peasant dresses and loaded them into the washing machines, along with a couple of Daniel's shirts.

"Is that why you are cleaning the clothes from your time with the Ori?" Teal'c asked with obvious confusion.

"Oh," Vala looked up from the machine. "No, I'm thinking of making a quilt, for the baby." She turned the water on hot and measured a good deal of detergent. "I thought maybe I'd cut up the dresses and sew the material together to make a blanket. Daniel's shirts will make the back of the quilt, and I'm using a pillow for the stuffing." She held her finger to her lips and winked. "Don't tell the Pentagon I destroyed a pillow."

Teal'c bowed to her once again. "Your secret is safe with me."

As soon as Daniel and Vala had made it back to Earth, Stargate Command had disclosed the coordinates of the supergate to all their allies. The Jaffa, Tok'ra and SGC all took shifts keeping the gate under constant surveillance. Any activity would be instantly reported. The Asgard were also consulted, and during the Prometheus's surveillance shift, the dialing panel was located and Sam was able to switch out a control crystal for one of their own. The Prometheus was able to successfully dial out and thereby keep the Ori locked out of the Milky Way.

Of course, that wouldn't stop the Ori from creating another one, but at least the one they knew about was blocked.

Meanwhile, science teams delved into the data brought back with the scout ship. Engineers went over every detail of the ship in order to enhance the shields on the current fleet of 304s.

Vala felt certain that they'd find a way to protect their ships and didn't think her involvement was necessary. However, she did ask Sam one day about the communication stones and if she might try using one to tell their friends in the resistance that they'd made it back all right. The request stunned Sam a little but she still brought out the emulator computer program and showed Vala the stones. They were working on making a device of their own like the terminal, but there was still a lot they didn't understand about the data.

Vala didn't mind being a guinea pig in this case. She just wanted to know if Kira, Denya and the rest of them were okay. She and Sam agreed that if Vala seemed to leave after the stone was activated, then Sam should shut the program down in three minutes to disconnect Vala. They could always turn it on again if Vala wanted to go back. They also didn't tell Daniel right away, which Sam very reluctantly agreed to.

Vala picked up the stone, but nothing happened. She remained conscious and in her own body. Sam explained that it was very likely because they didn't have a terminal on their end. But at least this way, if anyone in the Ori galaxy still needed to communicate with them, Vala would probably be the receptacle.

Vala nodded and tried once again to push her worries aside. Though at least once every few days she could be found in Sam's lab, holding a communication stone and watching Sam's emulator program, hoping for…something.

Other than that, she had briefings with various SG teams who were in charge of gathering intel on the Lucian Alliance. Vala reported on all she knew about the Alliance, even though she admitted her information was over half a year old. She doubted things changed much in the Alliance hierarchy, but she still cautioned the teams about her knowledge.

No one found it a bit surprising that her most common location was in Daniel's office. What was surprising was that she only rarely read parenting books or popular fashion magazines. She was frequently found arguing with the esteemed linguist about some Goa'uld translation, or debating heatedly the best way to sway people that the Ori were just another set of false gods. Daniel would side on arguments of logic and reason, and while Vala agreed that everything he said was true, people usually responded better to actions.

Some noticed that, even though the two bickered and fought, they nearly always came around and acknowledged the other's point of view. And only a spare few had caught Daniel going to Vala's door late at night, or leaving her suite early in the morning. There were whispers and gossip, but it was low-key and never meant to hurt anyone. Many even defended Vala if the gossip got really bad, especially those from the medical units who had witnessed her healing villager after villager on P8X-412, or the science teams who realized she'd risked her life to steal an Ori ship for them to study. If they kept watch on the alien and Dr. Jackson, it was only to see what would happen next in their developing relationship, because there seemed to be something there—that was obvious to everyone.

As far as Vala was concerned, she wouldn't have minded if Daniel came to her quarters every night, but more often than not he'd fall asleep at his desk. If he woke up in the middle of the night, he'd usually shuffle to his own quarters instead of Vala's. He'd told her once that he didn't want to always be waking her up. She'd reminded him that their baby kept her up half the night anyway, but she also kindly said she appreciated his thoughtfulness.

Whenever he did crawl into her bed, there was the occasional tingling, toe-curling kiss, but it never blossomed into anything more than that. And she honestly didn't know what to make of it. Part of her wanted to let him know that she'd be open to more, but another part whispered hurtful words to her, that he'd never enjoy sex with an ugly, fat, pregnant woman. Vala hardly ever listened to this voice, but it was still there.

Instead she tried to rationalize Daniel's actions. It seemed quite possible that maybe he didn't want to have sex in the same place where he worked. That maybe he couldn't quite be himself here. Vala liked that explanation, so whenever the evil voice in her head whispered to her, she used that as the counterargument, refusing to believe that her Daniel might find her pregnancy unattractive.

About a month after they'd arrived back on Earth, there was an incident on a planet called Tegalus. Vala was unfamiliar with it but apparently Daniel and the rest of SG-1 had a tenuous relationship with its people.

"Rand has control of the stargate on Tegalus, and has been in a cold war with its neighbor, Caledonia, for decades," Daniel explained to Vala in his office. "It's a long story but a prior has offered a satellite weapon to Rand in order to wipe out Caledonia if they don't convert to Origin. I don't know if there's much we can do, but we've got to try."

"You're going to try to negotiate with them?" Vala asked incredulously. "Any society mired in a cold war seems just as fanatical as the Ori followers. You may not be able to get through to them."

"Well, that's where the Prometheus will come in," Daniel replied. "Sam says the early schematics of the satellite show no defenses of any kind. We'll destroy it to protect the entire civilization."

"But isn't that a little bit like taking the choice from them?" Vala argued. "If they want to blow themselves to kingdom come, why not let them?"

"You don't really mean that, Vala."

She hesitated, but finally replied with a sigh. "No, I guess not. I just don't want you to go. Another bad feeling, I guess." She shrugged.

"I have to do something. When we gated to Tegalus, we completely disrupted their society. There were already tensions and problems, but we just exacerbated everything."

"You can't blame yourself for their people's differences."

"No, but they need to know the truth about the Ori before they resort to genocide," Daniel said finally. "I can at least do that."

Vala realized there was nothing she could say to make him stay. If she were in his position, she might even feel the same, maybe. It still didn't make her feel any better though.

"Just, come home safe, please," she pleaded, squeezing his hand and kissing his cheek.

Daniel kissed her back softly, then left to meet up with Kane, the Rand senator. Vala didn't see him again for three days.

The wait was interminable. Sam, Teal'c, and Mitchell had left on the Prometheus as soon as Daniel failed to check in. Sam had tried to assure Vala that the ship's shields had been retrofitted to withstand Ori weapons, and so the satellite shouldn't pose a problem, but Vala could barely calm her worries.

When word arrived that the Prometheus had been destroyed by the satellite weapon, Vala had been at the doorway of the control room, about to ask Walter if he'd heard anything. Her heart clenched, her lungs seized, and her abdomen contracted. She gripped the wall in an effort to keep herself from falling to her knees. Someone noticed her next and immediately went to help her sit.

Walter ordered someone to call the infirmary as he knelt in front of Vala. He assured her that in his almost nine years with the Stargate Program, SG-1 had always come home after disasters like this, always. She nodded to him, hearing his words, letting them soothe her, knowing somewhere in her heart that he must be right. The universe couldn't keep doing this to her.

When she woke up later in the infirmary, Daniel was sitting beside her, smiling and relieved. She was too afraid it was a dream even when she saw the rest of her friends stand up and greet her. Sam, Teal'c and Mitchell were all there. She only believed she was actually awake when Carolyn stepped into view and reminded her that the pains she had felt were false labor. Vala was ordered to take it easy for the next few days, and to come by if she felt any more contractions.

Vala nodded and her friends helped her from the bed. Each of them gave her a hug and she laughed as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I don't know how you all do it. And I finally have a little bit of sympathy for Jack."

"We're all addicted to caffeine and adrenaline," Mitchell commented. "Everyone except Teal'c, whose drug of choice is tretonin."

Teal'c dipped his head in a single nod.

"No honestly," Vala continued, as they all left the infirmary for the cafeteria and snacks, "it's no wonder Jack's hair has gone all gray. You guys really need to swear off saving the galaxy."

"General O'Neill has a club," Sam joked. "He'll probably let you in after today."

Daniel didn't even hesitate when he walked Vala back to her room that night. He walked in after her and locked the door. Vala waited until he turned around and then stepped into his outstretched arms.

"Can I just hold you for a minute?" she asked.

Daniel wrapped his arms around her shoulders and back and held her tightly. He hadn't meant to scare her. When they'd gone to the infirmary to be checked out and he saw her lying in a bed, he'd almost lost it. Dr. Lam explained that she'd suffered from acute-stress-related false labor. The contractions had eventually passed and Vala was encouraged to stay in the infirmary for rest and observation. Her body had dutifully complied and fallen asleep in no time.

He'd only had to sit there a few minutes after his check-up before she woke up, but they were very, very long minutes.

"Maybe we should think again about you staying at my apartment. Stargate Command is probably way too stressful for you."

Vala shook her head. "You never go to your apartment, and when I'm here I can get information much faster."

"That's what I'm worried about. If you hadn't been outside the control room you wouldn't have had those labor pains." He kissed her forehead. "And the only reason I don't stay at my apartment is because you're here."

Vala sighed happily, and lifted her gaze to meet his. "We are a pair, aren't we? How about I swear to stay out of the control room, and you swear to only go on missions studying dusty, dead civilizations?"

Daniel grinned at her then looked over her shoulder and down her back at her crossed fingers. "Cheater." He kissed her nose.

They undressed and got ready for bed, slipping under the covers and curling up in each other's arms. Vala was wearing a sleeveless, cotton maternity top and soft pajama bottoms, but it was probably the sexiest thing he'd ever seen her in. His insides electrified when he rubbed his hand up and down her arm. He not only wanted her, he needed her, but after the day she'd had, he couldn't fathom subjecting her to the force of his desire. So he tamped it down as best he could.

When she reached for him below the covers, he simultaneously wanted to push into her hand as well as recoil.

"You need to rest, Vala," he reluctantly pushed her hand away with his, "doctor's orders."

In the dark, Daniel felt Vala sit up and clutch her knees. She took a long, deep breath, then another.

"Daniel, I need you to be 100% honest with me. Are you stopping me because Carolyn said I needed rest…or because you don't want me?"

He immediately sat up with her. "Of course I want you. But you were told to rest, and sex is not rest."

Vala blew out a relieved sigh. "Okay then, we won't have sex. But let me do this for you. I want to give you some release."

...

...

When he had finally caught enough breath for words, he said, "Talk about torture."

"Tell me about it," Vala agreed. She got up and went to the bathroom to wash her hands. She returned a minute later with a wet cloth for Daniel. "Turns out when I torture a man, I end up torturing myself in the process." A small nightlight in the bathroom lit up the wink she gave him.

"I promise to return the favor," he said, pulling his clean pajama bottoms back on.

"And you know very well I intend to collect." Vala kissed his nose and laid her head on his chest.

Author's Note: Even though I rated this story M for mature content, I still self-censored this chapter. There is a slightly racier, yet still tasteful, version on my live journal account: search journals for username aeryn_b or aeryn-b. I'm not sure how else to direct you. Sorry.