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Paramour

(Termination)

Sara nervously made her way down the hall towards the bar where she had been told Rueben was- it felt strange being here with Greg waiting outside. It felt strange that someone knew her secret. It had surprised her how little it had fazed Greg when she had explained that she had been paying for companionship. It had seemed like such a strange thing to do when they had first been investigating the case but having spent time with Rueben she realised she couldn't judge any of the women her.

With a deep breath she glanced around the bar to find Rueben sitting in a booth surrounded by attractive young women in slinky outfits. Sara could feel the small amount of confidence she had used to walk into the club leave her as she noted how adoringly they were all looking at him.

Perhaps she hadn't have come- after all- she paid to go the gym and then stopped going.

Wasn't this the same thing?

She'd paid for a service- couldn't she simply just walk away without feeling guilty. But Sara knew it wasn't the same- the gym wasn't a person that could worry about her, or wonder where she was.

The sense of self deprivation that seemed to be constantly setting the tone for her everyday life came to life as it struck her that Rueben had many relationships- there was a chance he couldn't even remember who she was. And from the sight of the attention he was receiving she wondered why he would even bother him that she hadn't returned.

Sara took one last look around the room before turning back towards the door- attempting to think of whatever excuses she could use to explain to Greg why she had returned without a breakup.

"Sara!" Rueben shouted to get her attention moving through the crowded bar towards her- his chip toothed smile stopping her in her tracks.

"Hi..." She replied nervously, shifting her weight on her feet realising that she actually had to have this conversation now.

"What can I do for you?" He asked tucking his hands casually into his trouser pockets.

"Oh you're busy...I can come back another time..." She shrugged half turning to face the door- her body language giving her away.

"I'm really not that busy..." He smiled again and a part of Sara started to relax slightly. "And you'd be doing me a favour...talking about myself is getting really boring..." He exaggeratedly rolled his eyes indicating back to the table of women that were intently watching them.

"They don't seem to think so..." Sara gave a small laugh, smirking at Rueben.

"Well...They...don't think many things...I need someone like you challenge me..." Another one of his secretive smiles sent a shiver down her spine.

"Ha. What with my ridiculous relationship problems..." She teased.

"Err...well those and some other things." He shrugged attempting to keep the tone of their conversation light even though he could sense something more significant that chit chat was coming.

"What other things?" She raised an eyebrow questioningly at him.

"You're very smart...I find that slightly intimidating..." Rueben answered after giving her question a moment's thought.

"I see..." Sara pursed her lips as she built up the courage to talk about why she had come here in the first place. "I don't have long...but there were a few things I wanted to say before I left..."

"Sure...I understand..." Rueben glanced around quickly before turning back to her. "Let's go somewhere more private."

He lead Sara to one of the quiet rooms as he had done the first time she had come here and it felt odd knowing that this would be the last time she would see him- unless fate decided otherwise.

Rueben perched himself down on a heavy oak desk leaving Sara standing awkwardly before him as if she were a student receiving an official warning from the headmaster. She had never liked getting in trouble at school. From a young age she had been conditioned to know that being 'naughty' would only just result in punishment and occasionally- severe punishment that didn't seem to fit the crime.

"I want to end this...relationship..." She said slowly glancing around the room before finally forcing herself to look at Rueben.

"Okay..." he had a knowing expression- he had been through this before.

"It's just...I think it's time I did something to make myself happy." She shrugged slightly feeling unsure of herself again.

"That's good..." Rueben did his best to try and make her feel at ease again.

"I've walked away from him...Grissom." Sara's expression was pained as she recalled the phone call she'd had the previous night. "And...I just want to start over..."

"It's okay...I understand. I just want you to be okay." He smiled.

"I am...or at least I will be" She shrugged pursing her lips as she thought about the future.

"I didn't think you were going to come back. I have something for you...I was going to post it but since you're here I might as well give it to you in person." Rueben handed her a crisp envelope he'd taken from one of the desk drawers. Sara took it not bothering to open it then and there.

"I almost forgot...I wanted to give you your book back." Sara fished out the manuscript from her bag and handed it to him.

"What did you think?" Rueben asked sounding hopefully as he took it back from her.

"It's beautiful...you're a very talented writer." She beamed.

"Thank you...it means a lot..." A sudden shyness came about him. "Can I ask you something Sara?"

"Sure..." A slow reply came.

"Can I kiss you one last time?" He took a step towards her closing the space between them and Sara could feel herself become breathless. She simply just nodded not able to speak. Rueben's hands settled on her hips pulling her body flush against his before he met her lips with his own. He tasted like cigarettes and whiskey a heady mix that had Sara feeling light headed.

"Let me walk you to your car..." He whispered to her once the kiss had ended their lips barely an inch apart.

Sara opened her mouth to protest but Rueben had already intertwined his fingers with hers leading her towards the door so she simply just followed his lead.

She squinted in the sunlight as they wandered outside, her hand dropping from his as she saw Greg. He was leaning on the bonnet of his car, basking in the glorious sunshine that had ripened across the city while she had been inside. His eyes scanned the people passing by with an air of curiosity as he nursed the coffee in his hands. Perched beside him was a second cup of steaming coffee and a ridiculously large cupcake. She simply couldn't help the smile tugging at the corners of her lips at the gesture.

"That's Greg" she muttered, gesturing towards him with a soft smile "He's... a friend" Rueben nodded as his eyes followed her gaze and Greg spotted them.

He stood up and smiled in Sara's direction and Rueben noticed how his entire body seemed to come alive in her presence. How his eyes never left her for more than a second and how he waited for her so patiently and willingly that he was sure he would never stop. He recognised these traits in a man, he knew that look in his eye because once upon a time he had worn that same expression for a woman. He had once been the man who would wait forever for the tiniest hint of gratification.

"He's in love with you" he observed quietly, studying her features for any trace of surprise or emotion. Sara shrugged her shoulders without meaning too- her body seemed to respond while her mind scrabbled blindly to respond to what Rueben had said.

"Love like that isn't worth letting go..." He told her quietly. "Take a chance...you might surprise yourself..." And with that Rueben disappeared inside the club not bothering to wait for a reaction.

Sara took a deep breath before walking towards Greg with a confused expression indicating towards the large cupcake.

"I'm sorry about your break up..." He said awkwardly handing her the cupcake and coffee before smiling at her with everything he could muster.

"Thank you" Sara blushed at Greg's attention inching forwards on her tip toes to kiss him on the cheek but he moved far too quickly their lips finding each other's for an awkward peck. It felt like the ground fell away from under her, the power of the intimate contact knocking her for six and stealing her breath away. They pulled away within seconds apologising to each other their cheeks flushing pink but it was becoming obvious to her that she couldn't ignore what Rueben had told her.

Greg's eyes watched her nervously and she realised that it was the way in which she had always wanted a man to look at her- that after all of these years denying it she needed to make a change in her life and start to move on.