Disclaimer: Don't own characters or Glee I'm just borrowing them at the moment.

Quinn was the first one to wake up. She checked the time and it was 5:30. She groaned inwardly because she knew that with everything weighing heavily on her mind she was not going to be able to fall back asleep again. She needed to talk to Santana. Quinn slipped out of bed trying not to wake Rachel while doing so. She crept out of the room and went into Brittney's room. She shook Santana as hard as she could.

"Quinn you or Berry better be dying if you're waking me up right now." Santana said growling at Quinn. She did not like when people messed with her sleep especially when she was cuddling with Brittney.

"Come on Santana please I need to talk to you about Rachel!" Santana picked up the hint of hysteric when Quinn said that so she got up carefully so that she didn't wake Brittney. She hated exposing the innocent girl to all of this. She didn't want to ruin her innocence but she knew would have to find a way to explain this to her.

"What's up Quinn?" Santana said as they headed to the living room. Quinn got herself a glass of water than sat next to Santana.

"I'm worried about Rachel. I... I can't help her the way I want to. The ways she needs help. She's so angry. I can see it in her eyes and I can't help her and it keeps me awake at night because I know that I can't give her the help that she needs and... and..."

Quinn couldn't finish her sentence before she started to cry. She didn't want to cry but she couldn't stop the tears from spilling over. She hated that Rachel was hurting and that she didn't fully trust her. She knew that Rachel only asked Quinn to go out with her so that she could distract herself and she hated that but at the same time she wanted to be with Rachel and almost didn't mind that she was most likely just using her.

Santana watched as Quinn got lost into her thoughts. She wasn't all for the mushy bs but Quinn was her girl and she hated seeing people she cared about get hurt. She'd just kill you if you ever let anyone know she had a soft side. She knew that she needed to help Quinn and Rachel before things got to bad and both girls ended up broken and that would not be good.

"Look Quinn you have to force her to talk to you or this is just going to end up being worse than it started out already being. Sometimes a little tough love is what she's going to need or she's just going to keep shutting everybody out because she's not used to having people care obviously."

Quinn sighed. She figured the Santana was probably right. She was going to make Rachel talk to her. She was going to show Rachel that she could trust her and that she could come to her because if Rachel didn't have somebody to talk to her than she's going to go crazy. Quinn nodded at Santana and gave her a thankful smile. They climbed the stairs and went back to their rooms.

When Quinn got back into the room Rachel was curled into a ball on the bed her face hidden by her hair. Quinn sighed. She hated what that bastard had done to the old Rachel Berry. The Rachel berry that was so confident and wasn't afraid of anything. She knew what she wanted and wasn't going to let anybody or anything get in her way but now…. Now she's just a ghost of what she used to be. But Quinn was willing to do whatever she had to fix her.

"Rachel…"

"Rachel… talk to me."

Rachel just shook her head and turned away.

"No! Rachel I need you to talk to me. If you don't talk to somebody then you're just going to end up hurting yourself and I am not going to sit here and watch you fade into nothing. I need you to understand that I am not going anywhere. I need you to understand that you can trust me Rachel. Please baby, please just talk to me. I need you to talk to somebody about what you're feeling and you need to stop pushing everybody away because if you do you're just going to lose yourself even more!"

Rachel was sobbing by the time Quinn was finished. She didn't know how to trust anymore. Her father took a little bit of that away from her every time he beat her until she lost the ability to trust all together. Her father took everything from her and she was struggling to just end her like her father should have the last time he beat her.

"Quinn…."

Quinn climbed into the bed next to Rachel and pulled her into her lap. She was starting to think that she was never going to get through to the little diva in her lap. Or what's left of the little diva.

"No Rachel you have to taka to someone. Please Rachel!"

"I… I don't know where to start."

"Start where you feel comfortable."

Rachel pondered for a few seconds. She climbed out of Quinn's lap and sat next to her pulling her knee's into her chest and looked away from Quinn. She was trying to figure out how to put her feeling into words. She remembered when that was easy for her. She remembered when she wasn't afraid to speak her mind. But now she can't do that anymore. She's too afraid. She doesn't want to open up and end up getting hurt. She just too tired to do it anymore. She wishes that everything would just go back to how they were before when she was happy and had a family. But those days are gone and she was forced out of her ignorance and pulled into the real world too fast for her to handle.

"I don't… I remember the first time he really broke me. He told me that nobody loved me not even my mother. He told me that he and dad didn't really care about me and that I was alone. I believed him that day for the first time. The walls that I had built up over the years came tumbling down that day and it was like no matter how much I tried I couldn't put it back up again. I still hear him insulting me. He was right you know? Nobody wants me."

Rachel was now laying her head on her knees looking at the wall facing away from Quinn. She knew that her father was right when he told her those things. She could hear him now telling her that she was right when she said nobody loves her and that she was worthless and pathetic.

"Rachel that's not true. I know I haven't been the nicest person to you before but I'm serious when I say that's not true. I want you Rachel. The whole glee club wants you there Rachel. You mean more to all of us than you know and I am so so so sorry that we haven't shown that to you. I wish you could see that Rachel. I really am sorry."

Rachel didn't know if she could trust Quinn. She heard the sincerity in Quinn's but she didn't know what to do. She didn't want to end up with another broken heart. She didn't know why she would hurt Quinn by using her as a distraction. She knew that was wrong now. She liked Quinn for real but right now she wasn't ready for a relationship she just needed something to take her mind off of things. She didn't want to hurt Quinn. She just wants to disappear.

"I can't talk about this anymore Quinn. I don't want to. It hurts too much. If I talk about it then it makes it real and I can't pretend that it's not real if we discuss it and analyze it."

"Rachel you can't just pretend it didn't happen because if you do you're never going to stop hurting."

"I don't want to discuss this anymore Quinn please. I'm tired and I just want to go to sleep please."

Quinn sighed. Rachel sounded so tired and so defeated. She knew that tomorrow after school she was going to have to push Rachel because if she didn't then Rachel would never talk about it and she would waste away to nothing. Quinn was not going to let that happen. Rachel lied down and Quinn snuggled next to her hoping that the nightmares would go away for the rest of the night.

Brittney and Santana came into the room when it was time for them to get ready for school. They woke the girls up and an hour later they were all out the house and driving to school. School went relatively well for Rachel but she was starting to get annoyed by the protection detail that followed her around and she was never alone. She couldn't even go to the bathroom without someone following.

"Alright Santana please stop following me! I just want to use the freaking bathroom by myself!"

"Take a chill pill muñeca."

"Sorry sorry! It's just I haven't been alone all day. And by the way one of these days you are going to have to tell me what that means. Could you please just let me used the bathroom alone! I just want some privacy for at least 10 seconds today."

With that being said Rachel spun on her heals and went into the bathroom. When she realized she was alone she took a deep breathe. She checked the stalls to make sure she was alone. She locked the bathroom door and sighed. She was happy to have some alone time to think. She was happy to have some alone time to think. She slid down on the floor and was leaning on the door. But then she started to breathe heavily. She didn't realize how loud the silence could be. She didn't realize how much she hated to be alone again until she realized how much more it hurt. She got up unlocked the door and ran straight into Santana.

"Umgh. Oh my God I'm so sorry. Please don't hit me." Rachel said as she fell to the floor. She backed up not realizing who she ran into and backed up against the bathroom door. Santana bent down and put her hand on Rachel's shoulder to calm her down.

"Hey muñeca relax it's just me."

Rachel put her hand down and opened her eyes to see a very worried Santana looking back at her. Santana may have not been known to have a heart but she her heart ached for Rachel. She wished she had gotten another hit in on Leroy. Santana got an idea that might cheer the girl up for a few hours. Santana sat next to Rachel in the now empty hallway.

"Hey what do you say we get out of here and skip? You look like you have had enough of this hell hole for today."

"But we can't just skip school Santana. What if we get caught or we get in trouble?"

"Hey don't worry about it I got it covered okay?

Rachel nodded. She figured she could use a little time away from everything. Santana got to her feet and pulled Rachel from the floor. They grabbed their bags and got out of there before anyone noticed they were leaving. Santana texted Brittney and Quinn to let them know what she was planning and they left. Santana decided to take Rachel to the park since she always took Brittney feel better when she was feeling down. Rachel was silent the whole ride but she knew that she was going to have to talk to Santana sooner or later.

Santana parked and hopped out the core signaling Rachel to follow her. They walked for about 15 minutes until they reached a part of the lake that was pretty much deserted. Santana sat down by the water and pats the spot next to her for Rachel to take a seat.

"So you plan on talking to me muñeca?"

"You plan on telling me what that means?

"Yeah," Santana said with a chuckle. "It means baby doll. I figured it fit since you're so small and Britt dresses you up like her own life sized doll."

"Oh well that's such a sweet term thank you Santana." Rachel said sarcastically then sighed. Santana poked Rachel in the side encouraging her to talk.

"What do you want me say Santana?"

"I want you to talk muñeca. You know as much as I do that you needs to talk about this or you're going to end up going on all Rambo on Mercedes again. Just tell me what you're feeling right now and we'll go from there okay?"

Rachel nodded. She looked out into the water and leaned her head on Santana's shoulder.

"I'm fine right at this moment but I'm not okay most of the time. I can't be alone but when I'm around others it hurts."

"What happened in the bathroom? Why did you run out so fast like that?"

"Have you ever realized how loud the silence around you can be? When all your thoughts become so loud it's like the silence is screaming everything into your ear? All I could hear was my… Leroy's voice inside my head. Telling me how worthless I am and how ugly I am or how pathetic I am or how stupid or ugly or unlovable and I just wanted to make it stop. I know that I shouldn't believe it but it's all I think about. It's all I hear. And deep down as much I don't want to I know that he's right and it makes me hate myself."

Rachel was now standing and pacing back and forth clenching and unclenching her tiny fists. She was starting to angry with herself and him for what he had done to her and how much she hated herself. How much he had changed her and view of herself. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts and getting angrier at the second that she didn't hear Santana calling her.

"Muñeca… Rachel… RACHEL!"

Rachel jumped out of her thoughts and turned to look at Santana wrapping her arms around her chest. She was trying to calm herself down and trying not to get so angry.

"Look muñeca you have got to find a way to get you anger out or you're going to end up like Quinn when she went all ape shit on that idiot on the football field. And we have already seen what you did to Mercedes and we do not need a recap of that situation got me?" Rachel nodded her head in agreement. She didn't like when she was angry because she felt like she was turning into him. "Look why don't you throw some rocks or something get some of that anger out. And stop looking at me like I have a boob growing out of my head it might help."

Rachel nodded getting up and grabbing a few rocks from the floor. She tossed all the rocks from her hand into the lake her throws gaining more force with each one. She started to kick the rocks when they were finished in her hand. She saw a tree in the corner of her eye and turned and stalked towards it. She started to kick it over and over and then she started to hit it ignoring the pain in her hand. She was so wrapped up in the destroying of the tree and the tears that started to pour from her eyes that she didn't notice Santana telling her to stop before she hurt herself.

"Rachel come on stop it. Muñeca you're going to break your hands." Santana said as she wrapped her arms around Rachel's midsection and pulled her away from the tree. Rachel leaned into Santana as she gave in due to exhaustion. She stood there leaning into Santana until she caught her breath and the tears came to a stop.

"Come on muñeca let's go and get some ice for you hand. Q and B should be home from school by now." Santana said as she let go of Rachel and began to walk her back to the car. Before Santana got to far Rachel hugged Santana.

"Thank you Santana."

Okay guys here's chap. 11 I hope you like it. Please review and tell me what you think. Sorry for any grammar mistakes or mishaps before. You guys are awesome!