A/N: I have exams this week, so that might explain why updates have been a little slow! If you have any great insights on whether semantic information = syntactic information, whether consciousness can be explained solely in physical terms despite the problem of qualia, and whether intentionality is truly what distinguishes representation from resemblance, I'm listenin'. (I feel like there's a connection/analogy to be made with neutrinos somewhere for the first two, but damned if I can see it. Maybe the oscillation?)

And now for some hot boy lovin'!

Genesis and Reno looked at each other.

"Shall we continue?" they said at the same time (only Reno stuck a 'yo' on the end).

This time, it was Reno who reached for Genesis' nether regions.

.

Cloud's eyelids fluttered.

Sephiroth was at his side in a second. "Cloud? Cloud! Oh Cloud, you're alright! Oh, thank the gods!"

Cloud murmured, gazing around in confusion. "What happened?"

Sephiroth shook his head, pressing his lips together in a thin line. He didn't want his darling little chocobo to feel worried and endangered. "Never mind. You should..." Sephiroth eyed Cloud's crotch, but it was clear that the boy was too weak for consensual sex, and Sephiroth was too kind to force himself upon him. "You should get some sleep. Go back to your room." Each word caused Sephiroth almost physical pain and tension, but he knew he had no choice.

Cloud nodded and stumbled to his feet. Sephiroth bit his lip; the blond looked so helpless. If he grabbed him now, and shoved him up against the wall, Cloud would be unable to resist. Sephiroth imagined clamping his hands around Cloud's waist and then snaking them lower, to his hips and below, licking his jaw and rubbing his thighs- Sephiroth moaned in glorious agony. No. It would have to wait.

As the door clicked shut behind Cloud, Sephiroth's face twisted into a mask of furious retributive rage.

"Zack Fair, you will pay for this."

And Sephiroth now knew exactly how. He cackled, thinking about it.

Revenge.

.

Rufus Shinra awoke to the sound of smashing glass.

There was a strange man in his room!

A man with long, black hair, a red scarf and cape and golden pointy shoes stood staring at him. The man had large, violet, leathery, batlike wings. Above his sharp, hawklike nose, there blazed two glowing crimson orbs. Below his nose, his mouth was thin and sharp as a stiletto blade. Two tiny fangs poked out.

"You're a vampire," said Rufus.

The man gave a nodding snarl in acknowledgement. "I could smell the mako in your blood all the way from Nibelheim," he said mysteriously, swishing his cape. "My name is Vincent, and I want to suck it."

Rufus frowned and tried to sit up in bed, but he was too weak to shift the covers. With a hiss of frustration, he settled for propping himself up on one elbow instead. "Wait, you're saying that you want to drink my blood- I assume that just sucking it would be a little unfulfilling- because of its high mako content?"

Vincent Valentine the vampire nodded.

"Dear Lord," said Rufus, flipping his hair with a long-suffering sigh. "Why not go to a bloody mako reactor, then? There was one in Nibelheim."

Vincent frowned. This golden-haired blood bucket used too many words. "Enough. Quiet. I will leave you enough to live on. Now proffer your neck to me, and let me drink my fill."

"No," said Rufus.

"Then prepare to suffer the consequences!" roared Vincent. He dived at the young President.

.

(A/N: Read and review, please and thank-you! :D)