Disclaimer: Primeval does not belong to me, this is fan fiction, not for profit.

Any references to people, places, businesses etc is entirely fictitious.

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Abby looked startled at Jess' question. "What do you mean?" she asked her friend.

"Well," began Jess, "with the work we do… don't you worry? How did you know that you wanted to…" her words trailed off in confusion. Was this too personal a question to ask she wondered?

Abby smiled. "Do you remember my bridal shower?" she asked.

Jess nodded, remembering her pleasure at pulling off the surprise for her friend. She doubted that she would have been able to keep the plans hidden from Abby, if Mrs. Lester hadn't helped. The woman had made the Lester's London flat available for use. The other ladies had all met there and Jess just had to get Abby there in time for the party.

"Don't you remember all the talk," asked Abby.

Jess shook her head. It had been fun, but she mainly remembered juggling food and drinks, hoping nothing got spilled on the Lester's furniture. Abby smiled as she started talking.

There had been laughter and teasing she remembered. The other women had been giving advice on the wedding night and nights after, as though there had never been a year in the cretaceous. Somehow the talk had turned to the potential results of wedding night activities.

Edie had surprised Abby, with her wistful expression and quiet comment that she thought babies were wonderful. "Hope you have lots of little Abbys and little Connors!"

Abby had thought that sentiment would be something that Emily might have expressed. But, for a supposedly sheltered Victorian lady, Emily had been very forthright. "Women didn't have a choice in the matter in my time," she stated. "I think choice is one of the best things about this modern era." She had gone on to say that she didn't want to have children, she was in favor of birth control pills and reading a new book… something called Fear of Flying… Abby chuckled as she tried to describe the expression on Mrs. Lester's face when Emily had asked her if she had read it.

Connor's sister was also there. The young woman was interning at the ARC before her last semester at uni. She didn't say much, but Abby thought she was listening closely, just maybe… hadn't made up her mind.

Some of the other women from the ARC had chimed in with various comments, but it was Mrs. Lester's comments that Abby remembered most of all.

Mrs. Lester had looked so shocked at Abby, when she overheard Abby saying she wasn't sure about wanting to children.

"What?"

Abby looked up at the tall woman. She took a deep breath and tried to remember that Mrs. Lester was her hostess, reminded herself to be polite.

"I said," Abby repeated slowly "that Connor and I are still talking about whether or not to have children. We haven't decided yet." Abby didn't tell the woman, that she was the one who was undecided, didn't know if she even could have children. She knew Connor wanted children, but he seemed to discount her worries and fears. He said if anything ever happened to them, his mother and sister would surely take care of the children. It was the one thing that they continued to disagree about at the couples counseling class they attended.

But, it seemed as if the older woman was channeling her thoughts somehow. She smiled at Abby and said softly, "I remember having similar worries, when James and I were talking about… maybe marriage… and maybe children."

Mrs. Lester continued, "There have always been terrible things in the world, even before we knew of the anomalies." She glanced at the pictures on the mantle, her face softened into a smile. "The risk… to have a child," she said "is to give a piece of your heart… to be held hostage… by the future."

Abby looked at the woman in surprise, it sounded as if she really understood where Abby was coming from.

"What made you change your mind," Abby asked curiously.

"James asked me to think… if we lived to be a hundred, and the world was still here, spinning round as usual" the woman said "would I miss not having had children. Was I willing to sacrifice our present, both joys and concerns, for some unknown possible future?"

The woman reached for a piece of celery from the vegetable tray, and then continued.

"And of course, there's that one other thing…" she said, the mask slipping ever so briefly "I love him."

Abby was smiling as she finished her tale. Looking down at the gentle swelling of her abdomen, she said to Jess, "As you can see, we finally decided."

Her eyebrow creased with a tiny worried frown, before she continued, "the first visit to the doctor… we told him we thought maybe three months along… he said we needed to have the ultrasound to make sure… the baby is small..."

Jess listened to her friend's voice trail off, and remembered her older sister's similar concerns. "Abby, I'm sure everything will be all right," she said "first babies are usually small… and besides look how tiny you are."

Abby started to say something in response, when the sound of a crash coming from the front room startled both women. They looked at each other in consternation.

What on earth was that?

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