Warning: General, language, OOC..Etc
We're doin' this man, we're makin' it happen.
It was currently 10:30 pm on Christmas.
Roxy had invited Jane, Dave and Rose had invited their individual friends; John Egbert and Kanaya Maryam.
Egbert was a...dork to say the least, and Kanaya was very polite (Earning the classiest Vietnamese award from Roxy) and Dirk had invited Jake. Come on, WE ALL EXPECTED IT.
Currently, Everybody was residing on the couch. Dave and John arguing about who was better, Nicholas Cage, or Chuck Norris. While Rose and Kanaya were talking about something very..obscene. While Roxy and Jane...Well, who knew? Probably in the bathroom making out or something.
Jake looked awkward and Dirk just kept watching his episode of My Little Pony. Taking a sip of orange soda after a few minutes.
Dave stood up "Hey bro, we're gonna go to my room since your show is borin' as hell. "
"Be back by dinner. "
"...I'm not leaving "
"Still, be back before dinner, or else Rox's gonna throw a big fat lesbian fit. "
"...Whatever bro " Dave grabbed John's wrist and ran to his room. While Rose and Kanaya stayed to be with the two men on the couch.
"Hey, Dirk, " Rose spoke up, walking in front of the blonde lounging on the couch.
"Hm? "
"What are we going to eat tonight? "
"Hm..." Dirk pushed his shades up "How about...Chicken, potatoes, and carrots? That sound good? "
"That sounds good, right Kan? " Kanaya smiled and nodded.
"It sounds jolly fine! " Jake grinned.
Dirk stood up, stretching and popping his shoulders and back. He yawned and walked around the couch, patting Rose on the head. She made a noise and swiped at the back of Dirk's knees, he dodged and smirked down at Rose as she glared at him.
"You'll never be fast as me, Rosie " Had she had her knitting needles, Rose probably would have jabbed them in Dirk's stomach. He silently thanked Kanaya for being there.
"You don't need speed when you know how to pick locks AND know where the chainsaw is."
"You don't know how to operate a chainsaw..." Dirk mumbled, tilting his head.
"I believe I am the one with the knowledge of a chainsaw. "Kanaya smiled, a dark look on her face.
Dirk faked a pout "Man Kan, and I liked you to..." He put a hand to his chest "I feel soo betrayed. Oh my heart! "
Rose rolled her eyes "Oh go make the food you dumb slave " Rose pushed at Dirk. "And stop coming on to my friend.
"I'm sure she likes it, no one can resist this hot Strider ass. "Dirk said putting his hands on his hips and strutting.
"Oh mister Strider, oh~ " Kanaya said, putting one hand on her heart and one to cover her eyes and swooned.
"See, your friend likes me more then you, Rosie " He fake pouted.
"Because she's easily faked, now " Rose stood tall (As tall as going to a few inches above Dirk's waist tall ) pointed towards the kitchen, pursed her lips and scowled. "Go. Make. Dinner. Now you creepy pedophile. "
Dirk grumbled, making his way to the kitchen "Fine fine you little pain in my as- "
"Mister Strider I'll help! " Jake jumped up, making his way to the kitchen with Dirk.
"and I ain't no pedo! " He stomped into the kitchen, taking out a few cooking items while Jake floundered around.
Dirk rolled his eyes "Get the can of carrots, mix of potatoes and thing of chicken breast out, dummy. "
"Oh..right! " Jake quickly walked to the cabinet and wormed his way through going from the large one, to the middle shelf to the last shelf. Before finding nothing and doing it another time.
"Aha! " He pulled out a can of carrots, and set them on the shelf as he tried to find the box of potato mix. "I found 'em Strider! "
"Wooo, let's throw a party! " He pocked his head back out into the living room. " Rose! Get the strippers! "
"But, I thought they were for Dave when he hits puberty " Rose titled her head.
And speak of the devil "Someone said ' Dave' 'puberty' and ' strippers' in the same sentence? "
"No Davey, now go back to your room."
"Maaan, y'all suck D-"
"Dave! " Dirk yelled.
"Eggs. Y'all suck eggs. "
"Good boy." Dirk nodded, before Dave went back to his room, with John, alone.
"Mister Strider I think I found the potatoes! " Dirk turned back to Jake in his kitchen, holding a box/bag of potato mix. He held it out to Dirk.
-Alternate-
Jake gave a predatory smirk as Dirk reached towards the potato mix.
Jake grabbed Dirk's wrist and slammed him against the wall, and forced him into a rough kiss that made Dirk moan.
And then they did it. While Dirk kept his shades on.On the kitchen floor. ( While an unknown man watched them while also, wearing shades. )
-Original -
Dirk took the potato mix and walked to the refrigerator pulling out the chicken breast. Before setting them on the butcher block next to the stove.
"Thanks Jake for getting this shit. "
"Ah! No problem..um Bro! " He grinned.
Dirk rolled his eyes "Stop tryin' so hard bro. " He mumbled, as he unwrapped the chicken breast and placed it into the pan.
"I'm trying to be 'hip' and 'cool' " Jake grinned, looking very happy. Dirk rolled his eyes before checking on the food.
"Hey..Strider..."
"What? "
"Um.." He scratched his head "Do..are..you..um..do you know..if you like guys? " He looked a bit flustered.
Dirk raised an eyebrow "Why do you ask? "
"I'm just curious..."
"You're gay. "
"No! I still like girls! "
"So, you're bi. "
"I..guess? But what about you? "
"I'm Pansexual "
Jake nodded. "But you still like boys, yes? "
"...If I didn't, why do you think I'm getting gay strippers for when Dave hits puberty? " Jake stared at the Blond, slightly perturbed.
"To mess with his head? "
"That, and I like seeing men dressed in sexy outfits. " Dirk looked at the stove.
Jake nodded. " I see then.."
"Yup. "
"Hey, Strider...Do you by chance fancy me at all? "
Dirk stared at him, his brown eyebrows almost visible over his shades. Which was weird, since he is blonde...maybe he dyed it?
While Jake was mulling over this rather important discovery, he had no noticed that Dirk had to gotten closer to him.
"Why do you ask, Mister English? " He looked into the shaded eyes of one Dirk Strider. He was so close, almost as close that Jake could reach down, and stroke Dirk's nonexistent mustache.
"Well...because..I happen to fancy you, Mister Strider. " He mumbled, as Dirk slithered his arms around the back of Jake's neck, so he rested his hands on Dirk's hips.
"Well, Mister English, what happened if I happen to like you back? "Dirk mumbled, getting closer to Jake.
Jake stared at him, before blushing and pushing his lips to Dirk's.
It wasn't that perfect and it wasn't that bad. It was sloppy and wet and warm.
"HOLY SHI-BROOOOOOO "
"What, you ain't never seen a woman naked? "
"NOT MY SISTER!
Dirk and Jake pulled away, staring into the vicinity of the Living room. Jake laughed nervously while Dirk smirked and went back to cooking.
Defiantly a normal day.
"BRO! ROXY AND JANE ARE HAVING NAKED LESBIAN SEX IN THE BATHRO- "
"He don't care! "
BROOOOOOO-"
Dooooooooone~
I've worked about...six to seven hours on this /Le dies
Anway, y'all better like this, or Imma cry and curl up tonight with the sound of rain and sob. Nah, y'all ain't gotta like it X'D
Anyway, bye and it was fun while it lasted. And I think everyone for putting up with my shit, and I'm really glad you guys like what I write.
So thanks for all the reviews, favorites, and alerts. It really makes me smile when I get one and my heart makes this weird flip flop in my chest.
So again, thank you a lot. I'll be continuing to write other stories (If my two stories don't already take up my time. ) So, if anyone ever wants to talk to me, go ahead.
I love talking to new people ^_^
Anyway, I'm gonna go now .3.