So, this is, I believe, the penultime chapter. At most, there are two more chapters after this one. I really hope you are enjoying this so far.
Dan finds himself alone in the room's bed while Blair is in the bathroom. They are both having their space right now, alone. Reflecting on what had just happened. Blair is thinking on what would had happened if she had just left Dan while they were dancing and returned to her room alone. "I would have ordered room service and watched television" she tells herself, "And, I would not be feeling this confused right now."
In the meantime, Dan has already put on his undershirt and is debating himself of whether he wants or not to listen to the message she has received earlier on the room's telephone. He was curious, man, he was so very curious. He wants to have at least an idea of what is her life at the moment. How she has managed to construct everything again while he is still figuring how to glue the pieces together again. He lets his curiosity win, picks up the phone, and starts listening.
"You have one new message, click one to listen to it" He clicked, "Message received at 2:31 p.m."
He prepares himself to listen to whatever he has to listen.
"Hello gorgeous." A man's voice said "his husband, obviously" Dan told himself, "Sorry we missed you. Everyone's fine. Anya wanted to talk to you before bed."
Then, a little girl's voice began to speak; "Hi, remember to get the snowboard. Ok mummy?" And another girl's voice, Dan judged that she was older than the first girl, "And something for me too. Whatever you want."
"How magnanimous of you, Eliza." Blair's husband spoke again. "We'll try you again in the morning. Hope everything went fine, nothing awkward I wish. Be sure to take a photo in that bridesmaid's dress. That's for me, by the way. Love you. Everybody say I love you."
"I love you" both girls said. "Come soon, bye bye."
"Love you," her husband said again. "Call early if you want. I'm going to take a run."
End of message…
Dan hangs the phone, and he really doesn't know what to think. What is he supposed to think? At the least, he is bitter, he feels betrayed even when he knows she is married, but he didn't expected for her to have a family. A complete family. She has completely moved on. "Oh my god," he tells himself, "I am just the… the mistress."
He hears a whisper in the bathroom and because he knows he has already begun to meddle in her business, he decides to just finish the business. He stands up, walks to the bathroom, and begins to listen through the door.
"Hey. Hi, it's me. I didn't wake you, did I?" Blair is speaking to her husband in her cell phone, "No. Hum, it was… it was dull. Boring, boring, boring. Not much happened." Blair is now feeling more than confused, also guilty, now. She shouldn't have done it, not only to her husband, but to Dan as well. "I miss you."
"Would you mind if I use the bathroom?" Dan asks from outside partly because he does want to go to the bathroom and partly because he wants Blair to know that he is still outside, and that he is listening.
"It's fine." Blair tells him in a loud voice, "Can you leave it by the door?"
Well, now he is confused. Blair opens the door suddenly, she tells him with a look that he should stop talking. "Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't knew you were on the phone." Dan whispers. She closes the door again.
"Hi." She continues her conversation, "Oh, it was just room service. I know I shouldn't eat this late but, the food on the plane was horrible and then the food at the weeding was really off. Mhm? The tip? Oh the tip! Of course, thank you." She starts pretending to be looking for change in her purse, just to make a noise. "My mind is so gone. One second." She opens the bathroom door again and finds that Dan is still listening. "Have a good night."
"Thank you very much, madam. You look very nice by the way," Dan begins talking in a very fake female voice, "Enjoy your stay…" He doesn't finish, Blair closes the door in his face.
"Hi. Yeah, the waiter was very friendly." She starts talking on the cell phone again, "Oh I'm, I'm having, you know, french fries, french onion soup, and french toast, I think. And a pickle. What? Yeah, so very french except for the pickle. Uhm... I'm still thinking about it." She begins to whisper and looks under the door to see if Dan is still listening, "No, I'm still thinking. Yeah? Uhm, okay. I'll phone you before I get on the plane. All right, yes. I love you too. Ok. Yes love, bye."
She stands up and opens the door.
"I didn't knew you were on the phone." Dan tells her.
"I saw your feet under the door."
He smiles. "Well, you recovered very well. That was good."
"It's quite easy to lie once you get started." She tells him and starts walking towards the mirror.
"Well, I'm sorry."
"You could have put me in a really awkward situation."
"Well," He walks towards her, "I knew you would be ingenious and you were." He sits in the chair next to the mirror.
"Yeah, but what was the point?"
"To see you squirm."
"That's not very nice."
"You see, I wanted him to know that I exist."
"Of course he knows you exist."Blair whispers, "How could he not?"
"You don't have any secrets?"
"No. Nothing significant. No."
"So you'll tell him you made love to me tonight?" He is now bitterer.
"Maybe, someday." She walks towards him and he manages to take the cell phone out of her hand.
"Somehow, I doubt that." Dan tells her. He opens the cell phone. "Mister, Mr. Businessman. Hello?" Dan looks at Blair. "Should I call him?"
"No." Blair answers.
"Should I call him and tell him what we just did?"
"No!" Blair says clearly annoyed.
"Would that spoil things between you?"
"It might." She says from the bed, where she is sitting now. "Why would you want to do that?"
"Would it spoil things so much that you couldn't go back to London?"
"No. Not that much because I have a job up there, and a dog, and a house."
"And a family", he thinks.
"And a husband," he says pointing at the cell phone.
"And a husband."
"Hey, Mr. Important-Businessman," Dan again pretends that he is speaking to her husband, "My heart has been broken by your wife."
Blair stands from the bed, walks towards him and instead of doing what Dan was expecting, which was to try to get her cell phone away from him, she grabs his cell phone which is in the table next to where he is sitting.
"Oh, you want to play that game." Dan tells her.
"Now I get to phone Olivia the actress." Blair says and starts clicking random numbers on the phone while Dan starts to do the same.
"Go ahead."
"You don't care?"
"Not really."
"That's awful." Blair tells him.
"It is what it is."
"I hate that phrase." She says, closing his cell phone. "It sounds like dying."
He closes her cell phone as well. "What was your last serious relationship before your marriage like?"
"You know perfectly well how it was like."
"Refresh my memory."
"No."
"Honest, I can't remember." She watches him and crosses her arms, "The memory starts failing around 40."
She closes her eyes because they begin to water and she doesn't want him to notice. "It was red and it was kind of yellow. And black, and pink. And orange and blue."
"What the hell is that?"
"Purple, and indigo," She opens her eyes and starts laughing, "And maybe a little bit of..."
"Hey." He stops her, "What does that mean?"
"I don't know," She is still laughing, "It is what I see when I close my eyes."
"Come on!" He tells her, "That's a bullshit answer."
She stands from the bed, walks towards him, and demands for her cell phone.
"Ask nicely." He whispers with a smile. She doesn't say anything because that is not how Blair Waldorf goes around life so he eventually hands her the cell phone. She puts it on her night table along with his. Oddly, she notices, they are the same model.
"I love him." She answers his question while looking him in the eyes. "I loved him. But sometimes, people who really love each other, well, they have an uncanny ability to make each other miserable. I mean, of course you are happy, and you are happy for a very long time, but this uncanny ability makes its appearance and makes you, me, doubt everything. Is this real? Is this really happening to me? Am I this lucky? And me, I couldn't live with those doubts, I needed safe, Dan, I needed safe, and really safe. Safe in the sense that I didn't wanted to have doubts that you were once going to realize that you deserved better. And just walked away. I didn't want to be in a relationship where I could be hurt so much in a heartbeat. You had me wrapped around your finger. You see, when I gave you my heart I really meant it. But I was so insecure, and I had been deceived so many times before that I had to be careful. And I realized that you don't need, don't deserve careful. You deserve someone who is willing to give everything to you, to embrace everything you have to offer. And I realize it wasn't me, I couldn't, I was too hurt, and many mistakes were done before you, Dan. So I left."
"And now?" he asks her and looks at her, with teary eyes, but he controls himself.
"And now I'm happy." Blair answers him with teary eyes as well, "Of course I'm happy. Yeah, I'm happy. I needed safe and safe is what I got. But sometimes, I do miss the banter. It can be terribly romantic. It is the true."
"Do you want to know how my last serious girlfriend was like? How the last woman involved with my life was like?"
"No. I have no interest in other women." She says while smiling again, Dan smiles too.
"She was a great fuck."
"Wow."
"She was a great fuck." Dan continues, "And a great friend. No, scratch that; she was an excellent friend."
She just looks at him and then decides she needs to sit down. So she walks towards the armchair near the bed and sits. He stands up too and walks towards the window, opposite side of the room.
"You know I…" Dan starts talking. "I have to confess, I, I checked the message." She looks at him with bewilderment and with realization. "He called you, you couldn't be bothered. Remember, the red blinking light. It was really annoying during sex."
She just asks, "Why?"
"I wanted to know how he sounded like."
"And how does he sound like?"
"Like Neil Young."
"Hm," Blair whispers, "I haven't thought about it. Maybe a little."
"Foreign, cool." Dan says, "I hated him immediately."
"Probably, you would really like him."
"No, I hated him with a passion that I didn't know I was capable of anymore."
"For my sake?" Blair smiles at him.
"Yes, for your sake." Dan leans in the window, "Of course for your sake, you silly girl."
"I'm not a little girl anymore."
"Don't you want to know what the message said?"
"No."
"It said," Dan starts walking across the room, "That he loves you and he misses you. And wants you to call before you leave. In fact, he is going for a jog. He'll be up early so don't be afraid to call."
"Thank you."
"Yeah," Dan says, "You know? I… I… To tell you the truth, I just, I just expected more."
"A soliloquy from Hamlet?"
"No, but it was all just so ordinary." Dan tells her, "I mean, the man, the man that marries you should be extraordinary."
"Dan," Blair says smiling, "I'm done with the extraordinary. I'm too old for extraordinary."
"And how old would that be?"
"I've been too old for extraordinary for some time now."
"And that's my fault I suppose?"
"Yeah" She laughs, "God, you would love to think that, don't you?"
"Would you indulge me with something?" He asks walking towards her.
"Probably."
"And this will be unpleasant for you but there are some things that I would love to say," He kneels in front of her, "In fact, which I need to say."
"It won't matter anyway."
"Ok, it probably won't."
"Sad old story that everyone has forgotten, even me."
"No, don't say that."
"But I have, of course I have." Blair tells him, "I needed to forget so I could go on. And if I hadn't I wouldn't be here. When it comes to it," she starts whispering, "It is just stories of girls you used to know that read books under trees."
"No, I thought about it well, and you were not reading Persuasion."
"And what was I reading?"
"I don't know… something by Dorothy Parker," He laughs remembering another anecdote, another time. She smiles because she remembers as well their whole saloon failure.
"I was not reading Dorothy Parker."
"But it was something by a woman."
"It was The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton."
"Fine, it sounds about right."
"Not about, I was reading that book…"
"Okay. You were lying under a tree reading a book by Edith Wharton."
"The House of Mirth."
"The House of Mirth." He agrees with her and then continues, "It was the end of summer, a little muggy."
"Actually, there was a breeze."
He ignored that, "And everyone else was walking towards the building because class was about to start. I could tell that you didn't want to be disturbed so I said: You know that class is already starting right? And you said…"
"Who are you? And class can wait." Blair completed.
"Ala." Dan smirks, "And then you waved me away like your servant but I wouldn't desist so I took you by the hand and I said: You look like someone who cares, so no, it wouldn't. Your book dropped to the ground,"
"You got me by surprise." Blair tells him.
"And then, I don't know why, but I kissed you… on the mouth. Right there, and then."
"I remember now, and it wasn't in high school, it was not the first time you saw me at all."
"I told you the memory started to fail at 40." He smiles, "But the scenario is true, and the kiss is true, and it all happened, not in high school, it happened later, but it happened."
"How long we were into our relationship then?"
"I wouldn't call it a relationship, per se. You see, you told me before that you knew that being a businessman's wife was better than being a writer's wife. And you said that because you were in a serious relationship with a writer and yes, it was serious. But that was not all, and I let you play along because that is just how I am. But you have to admit it now, Blair. It happened."
"All right Dan," Blair says, smiling, "How long we were into our marriage then?"
"Six months."
"Not so long, then."
"Not so long."
"And then what happened?" Blair asks him.
"It was the end of the summer. We were in the Hamptons so we returned to the city."
"And then?"
"Well, we bought curtains, we… walked the dog, and we cooked meals for two. We finally finished school. We had sex once in the morning and once in the night; sometimes once in between."
"Sometimes twice." Blair reminds him.
"But sometimes you were alone, sometimes I was alone. Your husband was young, so he was foolish and careless."
"No."
"And you were pregnant."
"No."
"And you ran away." Dan says sighting, remembering, "You ran as far as you could get. You ran to Paris, and then to London, you met a businessman and then married him. You divorced me in between that, of course. Is that the ring I gave you?"
"No."
"It looks like it."
"It's a ring, it's a wedding ring." Blair tells him, "It is white gold and round." Dan touches the ring and she pulls her hand away, "What happened to the husband? The first, or was it, the second husband?"
"The second husband, remember that ass Louis." Dan answers her, "Well, he, the second husband, sometimes he thinks about ending it, his life."
"That is not like him."
"Yeah," Dan tells her, "Sometimes he can't bear it. He can't bear the loneliness." He stands from the floor and lies on the bed instead. "And one day you're at a wedding and a man, offers a glass of champagne to you. You tell him you don't drink anymore. The man makes stupid jokes; the man thinks that if he talks fast enough the woman might not notice."
She stands from the armchair and goes to the bed and cuddles with. "Might not notice what?"
"That he is the same," Dan answers her, "It would be as if she met him for the first time."
"Does it work?"
"For a while, anyway." He responds, "She takes him to her hotel room but as soon as the lights go down, she recognizes him. She's one of those people who see things better in the dark." He can smell her hair now.
"And then?"
"And then," Dan whispers to her ear, "It is all over."
"It's over." She says, and they kissed. And then she suddenly stands up from the bed and runs, opens the door and runs, in her sleeping robe, away. He doesn't have time to think, he stands from the bed quickly, grabs the hotel room's key and follows her, because it is what he always tries to do. He tries to find her.
Uhm... so what do you think? Did you liked that? Did you expected that? Anyway, I really hope there are no errors in the continuity, or if there are, hopefully they are not major ones and that you can ignore them.
The book that Blair was reading, The House of Mirth. In the movie, it is the original book that it is mentioned, and I was going to change it to the Belle Jar, or maybe The Age of Innocence, but, The House of Mirth, I think, it is very appropriate for Blair in canon.
Anyway, I'm going on vacation this Friday and I don't know when I'm coming back, I'll try to upload something on Thursday, but there are no promises. Thank you again, and enjoy your summer.